Hi, Gasmii! Here’s my holiday present for you – straight to a full recap! Let’s get right to it!
We open with Maria Menuonos introducing the cast, and then going right to “the” issue – the wonder twins’ isolation from the rest of the cast. We see a video where Ashley and Zach claim the 7 were a group in the beginning, it was only later in the summer that the split happened. Nate rebuts that and says there was never a time when there was a cohesive unit of 7. Priscilla and Frank back him up.
Back in the studio, MM says she isn’t buying their teary goodbyes. Zach again says there were lots of good group times, but the other 5 have just chosen not to remember them. Oh, so it’s collective amnesia. Right . . . MM asks about now, and Frank says he’s not friends with them. MM asks if there was a point where folks collected others’ phone numbers and Frank says yes. He says he hangs out all the time with the other 4. MM asks Nate if he thought he would make 6 friends, and he says that was his motivation. But as time progressed, he wasn’t getting “100% from everyone”. He doesn’t like that people feinted (props to Nate for that vocab word!) because it’s the “Real” World, they’re not actors. He’s offended by people who front a persona or a facade.
MM asks Alexandra if she was eager to go home. She says she felt everyone was eager to get away from the tension. Zach pipes up to say how eager he was to leave. MM asks why Zach and Ashley didn’t join in the crab circle on the last night. Ashley responds she didn’t know what it was. You saw it in Mexico you liar! Also, you’ve made Nate sad! Booooo!
One one hundred, two one hundred . . .
Frank says something about they knew what it was. Gasmii, I have played this clip about 10 times and can’t make out the rest of what he’s saying (I also checked close caption, but they didn’t catch it either). Ashley says could Frank not talk sometimes. Funny, that’s what we think about you, honey. Ashley says the things Frank says are ridiculous. She, on the other hand, is apparently the epitome of honesty and plain talking. Ashley and Frank argue about whether they talked at the house, and he calls her an effing fake bitch. Finally . . .
Ashley complains MTV doesn’t play the clips where the tried to talk with Frank. Frank says they also don’t play the clips where he spoke to the other 4 about trying to have a relationship with her. He says Ashley basically talks sh-t and can never give an example of the bonding with others behavior she alleges. Zach pipes up to call Frank an effing psychopath. Frank says cool, he’s happy to be that way. Zach retorts “glad you are”. Frank says he’s in love with life and starts to say he’s sorry the wonder twins aren’t, but stops and says they are happy together and that’s great. Zach then calls Frank an idiot and says everyone who watches the show “conveys” Frank’s an idiot. The fact that you don’t know the meaning of “conveys” makes you an idiot, Zach. Then he calls Frank a moron, and Frank says he’s confident in himself and Zach can’t put him down today at all.
I want to slap that look off Ashley’s face.
MM says one person brought the drama this season more than any other. Quelle surprise – it’s Frank!
Commercial, but first we hear that Sam is back home with her parents, and also performing as Shawn Jade.
And we’re back. We hear from Alexandra, who’s back in LA, living with Byron. She’s started a blog about homeless musicians. She tries to meet a new musician every couple of weeks, and then do a video blog about them. That’s super cool! Alexandra says being a musician gives her a joy she doesn’t get from anything else.
Making a difference = super cool!
Back in the studio, we see some clips of people talking about how Frank affected them. It seemed to always end up as how Frank feels. Frank owns up to it, and says although he’s sorry about some of the things, he doesn’t regret anything. He also says he’s infectious. Zach says Frank freaked out 3 times the first week. Frank asks if Zach getting in Sam’s face was appropriate. He says they all, except Ashley, freaked out. He asks Zach why he hates him. Zach says he doesn’t hate Frank. he just wanted him out of his face. Frank says he was just asking Zach to things.
MM asks Frank if he can realize how his behavior came across. Alexandra says she liked Frank, and he pulled her out of her introversion. Priscilla says Frank was the guy who got people together. MM asks if Frank wanted to leave. He considered it. Frank says the house was the first time in his life he ever had to face consequences of his behavior.
MM says Frank was a lot to handle, and still is. Alexandra says people can only affect you if you let them.
That’s very Zen.
Next, we hear what Nate’s been up to. He went home for a few days, but kept thinking about the Living Memoir and realized he had to move back to San Diego to work on Living Memoir. Also there’s no winter, and good-looking girls. So it’s a total win.
We’re back in the studio now, with clips about Zach. Alexandra makes the point that a lot of the “butting heads” between Frank and Zach had to do with homophobia. Others comment that Zach’s on his high horse a lot.
In the studio, Frank says he didn’t bring up sexuality with Zach, except at the beginning, and that it was Zach who kept mentioning it. Zach says Frank brought it up. MM asks Frank if he liked Zach and he says yes, that’s why he fought for their friendship. MM asks about before the separation, and Frank replies when he brought home a guy and Zach stopped talking to him, is that what she’s talking about? He thinks it’s a question for Zach. Frank starts to shout at Zach to tell them his views on gay people. Sam says it’s about gay people in general.
Sam’s not believing it.
Zach says he has no problem with people sleeping with whom they want. Frank asks what the disconnect is, and Zach says what doesn’t he understand. Zach says he doesn’t like the way Frank treats him and Ashley. And then calls Frank a dumbass. Frank then says he really likes Zach and wants to like him.
MM asks Zach does he agree that he felt it was ok for Nate to sleep around, but not Frank? Zach says he talked to Nate, especially after he slept with a girl who looked like a hamster. Nate says they could laugh it off because their relationship was different than the one he had with Frank.
Priscilla then says all 4 of them got to know and like Frank. What grounds does Zach have to dislike him based on “something other than the judgments you’ve made from afar?” Zach responds “so it’s all me disliking him, it’s not him disliking me” which leads to Frank saying all he did was try to involve Zach in events. Zach then says “you’re right, it was all my fault” and he takes all the blame while making this face.
Go f yourself, pal.
MM then says when Michael was in the picture, Zach and Ashley really liked him. Frank says they did it so they wouldn’t appear homophobic. Ashley says she liked Michael a lot. MM asks if it wasn’t genuine, and Frank says he doesn’t believe it was, but then he doesn’t know what is, or isn’t, genuine with the wonder twins. Ashley says she can’t say anything and have Frank believe it, so it doesn’t matter what she says. MM says didn’t Frank/Michael and Ashley/Zach spend time together? Frank says yes, he was trying to be friends. He had ground to make up, since he was a “nutso” the first week in the house. MM asks since they were friends, and the wonder twins liked Michael, does Frank still believe they are homophobic? Frank says we still haven’t gotten an answer. Zach says he already said he doesn’t have an issue.
Frank then says why is his lifestyle something Zach looks down on if it’s not about gay people? And why doesn’t Zach support gays in the military? Zach says he doesn’t support sexuality in the military at all. So using that moronic “logic”, Zach wants a fighting corps comprised solely of robots? Zach says gay or straight should not be able to express it in the military – and apparently straights don’t.
Are you effing kidding me?
Sam has now had it. She bursts out that Zach is a “straight jackass liar” (YES!) and asks him how many homecomings he’s been to. “Homecomings” says Zach like he’s never heard of the word and Sam is speaking some strange foreign language. So Sam has to explain “where military families come home”. She starts to say “where- ” and he interrupts, so Sam says “shut the f up! This is my thing”. Sam is crying now, and says “I have stood there and watched my father in uniform kiss my mother. They are a straight couple. How can you tell me that sexuality cannot have a voice in the military. Please – tell me!” Zach says he “researched” it. Sam says “research! witness it first hand!” Zach says he talked to a Ranger, and then says he doesn’t have to answer the question. He talked to them, and they say “it” doesn’t belong in the military. Sam says it’s not a question, she is proving a point.
You go girl! I totes love you even more.
MM then asks Sam if she accepts Zach is ok with her lifestyle when he said he was. Zach, whom MM was not addressing, starts to answer, but Sam talks over him “no, because he goes back and forth so many times”. Frank says there are effing inconsistencies, and if he could get a g-ddamned written essay that says how Zach feels, he would love that. MM says Zach is expressing his feelings. Frank says he accepts it because he would love to move on.
So gay rights BORES you, Ashley? Self-centered homophobic little b-tch. And the same for your oh so “macho” boyfriend.
MM then asks Zach if he feels he will ever be able to develop a close friendship with someone who’s gay. Zach says he has friends back home who are gay. But they don’t talk about what they’re “doing in the bedroom”. No, because that would mean you would have to hear about, understand and accept their orientation. If you just pretend they aren’t gay, it all goes so much better, right Zach?
Commercial. We see a clip of Priscilla talking about going to school at UC Davis. As you know she wants to be a doctor. Also, she’s liking spending time with her mom again. She talks about cooking, but thankfully doesn’t mention if her time with her mother also includes more making out.
I’m wearing glasses! That makes me smart!
In the studio, MM introduces clips of the cast talking about Ashley. Nate calls her a “fake-ass bitch” (YES!) who signed up for the wrong show. Apparently she also signed up for “America’s Next Top Almost” . Her being on Real World was a “miscast”. Alexandra says Ashley put people off by doing a 180 on her opinions and likes/dislikes. Priscilla says she told Ashley they didn’t know anything about her. Zach refers Frank saying he would break Ashley down, and says that’s the point where she realized she didn’t want to spend time around him. Nate says she can claim “editing at its finest” but that’s “complete dogsh-t, because they would have shown it” and the relationship with the housemates “is why we’re here! Why the f would they cut that out?” (YES!!)
Back to the studio, Ashley says she didn’t know Nate felt that way. Frank says he told her he came to her on behalf of the others. She also says Nate wasn’t around much the second half of the summer. MM asks Nate why he felt that way. Nate says who is she to get to know him, and not reveal herself? Zach says it’s not in the contract. Nate says he just wanted to get to know her. Ashley says it takes “months – months!” to open up to people. She says she never said a negative comment about Nate. He says he tried to get to know her time and time again. He wanted to know her story.
Completely bored when she’s not the one talking. Even when the subject is her.
Zach says everyone is different, and maybe Nate being up in Ashley’s face wasn’t the best way to handle it. Frank asks why Ashley did the show, since the premise is they come into the house and be open. Ashley says if there wasn’t a guy she’d fallen for, she would have probably clung to the closest girl. Zach says when Ashley asks if he’d done anything differently, his response is he’d have been a bigger a-shole. I find that literally unbelievable. Zach can’t possibly be a bigger a-shole then he is now! Nate says that would have been a great change, since then at least everyone would have known where Zach stood.
Commercial. We see a clip of Frank, who did move to LA after the house closed. He’s been looking for jobs with LGBT nonprofits, applying for grad school, and hanging out with Alexandra. Also, Frank has Diego, an adorbs little dog.
Me llamo Diego. Soy completely adorable!
Frank has been helping out with the AIDS Ride.
That color doesn’t do much for you, though.
Back in the studio, MM again wants to talk about the wonder twins. WHY???? We’re 26 minutes into this – move on! We see a clip of Ashley saying people pushed her and Zach together, and then everyone did a 180. Sam says people couldn’t do anything with one of them, it was always the couple. Nate says Ashley and Zach got together because they’re both superficial.
Back in the studio, MM asks why the wonder twins didn’t engage with anyone else. Zach rambles something about him not opening up and she freaking out. Alexandra says it’s great they have each other but if they’d met outside the house, would they then not talk to their friends? would they not go to work? or social functions? Ashley says that’s in any relationship, especially if it’s a really strong one. No, Ashley, really strong relationships involve two people who are complete in themselves, who have their own friends and interests, and pursue those as well as being in the relationship. Your idea of a relationship is apparently one you formed at age 10 while reading romance novels.
MM says they appeared antisocial. Frank says they didn’t want to come out of their comfort zones. Sam says why did they try out if they weren’t going out of their comfort zones? Priscilla says she had a lot of good talks with Zach and then when he hooked up with Ashley, she felt the third wheel. Sam says one time Alexandra waited outside the gym for the wonder twins so they could go to dinner, and then they told her they were just going home, and Alex came home upset. Alexandra says she defended them, and cared about them, and then at the end they wouldn’t give her their phone number. Ashley claims that she didn’t think she had an issue with anyone. Then you are the biggest moron on the planet.
MM asks the wonder twins if they feel they missed out on anything They say no. So hanging out in a gym for 3 months was the ideal way to spend their time?
Commercial. And we see Zach back home, being a personal trainer/physical therapist. He says his roommates in Michigan all love him.
Zach and Lincoln. Wonder if Lincoln is gay.
Back in the studio, MM mentions sex. We see a clip about who has game, and who doesn’t. Frank thinks he does. Nate thinks he does. Alex and Priscilla think Sam does. MM asks if there was a divide between people who were having sex, and those who weren’t. Everyone seems to believe Zach and Ashley weren’t getting it on.
More sex talk – Sam keeps a book of her partners. Frank had the most sex, but Nate was the most enthusiastic. Frank was the best kisser. Frank loves Alexandra and would be with her if Byron were out of the picture. She says she wouldn’t date him.
Commercial. We see what Ashley is up to. She says she’s living with her mother and “in transition”, deciding what her next step will be. Oh, so you’re mooching off your parents. Nice. And – this is a real shocker – she goes to the gym. Apparently working out is a “passion” of hers. Honey, you must think we’re the stupidest people ever. We watched the show. We know working out is pretty much all you do.
You could go outside and walk, but that would mean interacting with those pesky humans, and we can’t have that.
Back in the studio, MM asks Zach if he sees a time when he can put things behind him and be friends? He says he doesn’t know. Which, of course, means no. MM asks Ashley if she’s bummed she didn’t connect more. Oh not much.
And now we see a preview of Challenge, the Battle of the Exes, which starts January 25. Nate and Priscilla are on it. Yay!
So that’s it for San Diego. I’ve had a lot of fun recapping the last part of the season. See you in January for Challenge, and also catch my recaps of Tabatha Takes Over, which starts January 10 on Bravo.
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