RHOA Recap: Gone Fishin’

27 Comments

1. 1
   kthxbai
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 3:15 am

   @L Boogie I’m laughing too hard to type in a straight line. I’ll try to make a real comment later.

   But now I just wanted to thank you. And try to explain about sweet tea. Except I don’t think it can be explained.

   In the USA deep south it’s just their ways. Even people that don’t let their kids have any candy or anything that’s got gluten etc in it. Their kids are growing up with sweet tea being the only sugar they ever have. It just goes way deeper than the health food craze. Those tv doctors would have better luck trying to to get people in UK to quit drinking hot tea in a cup.

   Even after the zombie apocalypse when there’s nothing else left but roaches and Cher, in the USA south sweet tea’s what they’ll be floating in.

2. 2
   Jane and Blanche
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 3:54 am

   LOL my first thought was shit faced too!!!! Great minds;)
   Also the sweet tea thing, in Mia and Mexico, I can’t tell you how many parents put Pepsi or coffee in their babies bottles! The first time I was requested to do that on the plane I was the one who acted like I was slow. Funny recap!!!!

3. 3
   kthxbai
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 4:52 am

   @Jane and Blanche Pepsi? They must’ve made some big inroads in those places. I’ve never seen anybody give the baby any soft drink that wasn’t Co’Cola. After sweet tea, it’s probably the Number 2 favorite non dairy child beverage in USA south. In Mexico I’d expect to see either Jarritos or horchata before Pepsi. Ew.

4. 4
   MarGoRita
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 8:18 am

   I agree about the coke v Pepsi comment. My bro lived I Georgia, outside ATL for about 5 years and said that it’s almost like a brainwashing camp for coke – a cola, that is. People drink that bc of the huge influence and bottling plants/museum and the huge amount of jobs and money it brings to the Southern economy. He said he and his friends got blazed once and wet on the Coke tour and he said by the end, he almost felt brainwashed into only, ever wanting to order and drink coke. It’s more funny the way he tells it. But it’a the way it is. Told argue w me about it, it’s just what I was told. Who knows if that’s what the actual situation is. As for sweet tea, I remember visiting him and you have to request NORMAL iced tea, if that’s what u want. Personally. I think sweet tea is disgusting.

5. 5
   Classy Drunk
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 8:37 am

   Unsweet is what you ask for when you want “regular” iced tea in the south. But most times people order sweet tea so if you want unsweet that’s what you ask for.

   Coke is a southern thing because that’s mostly all there is down here. There is no Pepsi unlike when I’ve been above the mason dixon line. Both are readily available.

   My aunts were down from NY this summer and we asked what would the want to drink when they got here. They said Pepsi, my brother’s all “where would we find it”. I said I am not sure. I mean it’s in the regular grocery store but down here no one looks for it.

   I drank coffee when I was at least three from what my mom said. I guess it’s the milk and the sugar.

   Seems Walter was over the situation at this point. He just came to play fake boyfriend and get some free advertising for his towing company. She went cray and thought they the things he was saying was for real. Sorry Kenya but after the conversations you probably should have notified him that you were just acting so he wouldn’t be so put off and confused.

   I’m not sure about this season. It doesn’t seem to have a main plot or long term story lines. It seems every show could be an independent episode. Maybe it will tie all together at some point.

6. 6
   caligal
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 8:46 am

   All tea in Cali is unsweet, unless it is fruit flavored. It’s just god-awful, so I make my own. I am one of those people who can taste the difference between Coke and Pepsi, and would buy Coke if Pepsi was being given away for free. I guess it is a southern thing.
   I really want to introduce Kenya to oil obsorbing sheets, Biore, something. Anything.

7. 7
   MarGoRita
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 9:09 am

   Agreed about the difference by coke and Pepsi. Pepsi has more sugar or something – to me, at least. As far as this season, I think Kenya is a pig. She’s so full of herself, which is sad bc we all know she just wants someone to love her and accept her, which her mother didnt do. Thats heartbreaking. Worse things have happened to to other people and those people either chose to be victims or take life by the horns and give themselves the life they need and want. That whole, I’m part of history crap, good for you, but don’t ever equate yourself w former Presidents. That was bizarre on a whole different level. And really?! The only people that I think, I’m speaking for myself here, so I hope no one takes offense, or knows the difference bt Miss USA and Miss America are the moms and coaches from toddlers and tiaras. And of course, the contestants, themselves. What a weirdo. Yes, for real. A FAKE ASS relationship. She’s such a beauty, too. It’s just the outside doesn’t match the nut job, inside.

8. 8
   Jane and Blanche
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 11:17 am

   Trust me, coming from Texas, it’s coke ( even if you want a dr.pepper) So when they handed me the bottle and said Pepsi it threw me! Lol

9. 9
   dizzygirl
   Posted January 10, 2013 at 11:39 am

   There is no such thing as “unsweetened tea” Tea is naturally unsweetened..you need to add sugar to make it sweetened…drives me crazy at some places when I ask for ice tea and either there is sugar in it…I would have asked for “sweetened tea” if I wanted that or they bring out 27 sugar packets with it…pet peeve…rant over

10. 10
    NatPatBen
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 11:55 am

    HILARIOUS recap. I already knew you were going to say something about Porsha knowing emancipated.

    I’m liking the lack of screaming and fighting in RHOA now. It’s refreshing after Miami; still trying to make myself watch the reunion episodes for that one.

11. 11
    newsroomFan
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 3:12 pm

    “Kenya: Oh, it’s not a weave. I just had a colonic and decided to recycle.”

    You ain’t right.

12. 12
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 6:13 pm

    I love Pepsi and I’m proud to admit it.

    Funny how on the RHOA boards, my human verification code is “Hello Sweetie.”

    Anyway, the last ten minutes of this episode was so sad, considering we all know the fakeness of the Kenya/Walter relationship. I do agree that if she told Walter privately that this was all for pretend so that she could get cast on the show and earn a living, then it wouldn’t be a big deal and he would’ve rolled with the punches. Instead, she makes herself look even more pathetic and pathological and I want to feel bad for her, but all the bullshit is of her own doing.

13. 13
    kthxbai
    Posted January 10, 2013 at 9:31 pm

    @L Boogie What you said about us having to look at the oil slick that’s Kenya’s feet and legs all the time got me to thinking.

    And also got my embryo Kenya = Karent theory to growing.

    It started just because they were both pageant girls that got fake boyfriends to be on Real Housewives.

    But then in her lost footage Karent said she wished somebody would’ve worked on her teeth when she was little. Like she was doing in her charity scene.

    That’s when I got a revelation. Those Eric Estrada Halloween costume teeth she’s got aren’t press ons. I think not having a dentist when she was a kid not only fucked up her teeth. But her whole tooth related psychology.

    She’s had plastic teeth since before she was beauty contest age. And because of her fucked up tooth esteem she picked the most giant crazy ass 1s they make.

    I think the same thing happened to Kenya. But with ashiness.

    She didn’t grow up with $. Probably 1 of those situations where the grown folks work so much they let some things fall by the wayside. Like putting lotion on the kids. So I bet little Kenya had to go to school with ashy legs. And got made fun of.

    So she ended up with such fucked up skin esteem that she doesn’t feel right unless she looks like she just rolled out of a can of Crisco.

    I bet most of those foot and leg shots are her idea. Because she wants the world to see she is not afflicted with a scrap of ashiness. Even on her feet.

14. 14
    dizzygirl
    Posted January 11, 2013 at 8:35 am

    @kthxbai…..you maybe the first person I want to crawl inside your brain and see what the hell is going on in there!! Hilarious!!! I also bet That Karent and Kenya had it put in there Bravo contracts that the needed teeth and leg shots at all times…. Oh my God that was so funny! not a scrap of ashiness…lol

    captcha code…mumbo jumbo

15. 15
    Rosemary's Baby
    Posted January 11, 2013 at 2:20 pm

    In old Italian households like the one I grew up in, grandparents would take wadded-up balls of bread, dip them in red wine, and give them to the little kids to eat. Not only were my teeth fine, but boy was I a happy child.

16. 16
    kthxbai
    Posted January 12, 2013 at 11:35 am

    @dizzygirl Wow Thanks! You cheered me right up! Between me being filter impaired and long winded to boot. Plus medication issues everybody ends up having to live in my brain unless they know to see my name and scroll like hell.

    I try to put up a pain pill warning to make it more consensual. But sometimes I forget. Or forget I didn’t. So I’m chuffed to bits to find out somebody likes it.

17. 17
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted January 13, 2013 at 11:44 am

    Is it bad that when I am watching the Seahwaks-Falcons game, I can recognize Kroy with his Helmet on?? Plus he is the only white guy on the Falcons Defense that I can see. I can’t remember that assclowns number, but I know his ugly mug with his helmet on….The Seahawks better score, otherwise I am going to be eating alot of humble pie!! Yes I can admit that I have been doing some shit talking this week, but I can bow out gracefully….

18. 18
    JennBug
    Posted January 13, 2013 at 8:47 pm

    I haven’t even read the entire first page, but Bri’Asia….seriously?? Poor, poor girl! (I do apologize to any Bri’Asia’s out there that I may have offended!)

19. 19
    Classy Drunk
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 4:55 am

    @Thisbuggs…Kroy is actually very handsome IRL. He’s number 71. Pete Carroll is an idiot…

20. 20
    Gypsy
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:06 pm

    The recipe for Coke is in a Suntrust building in Atlanta one half is in one security deposit box and the other half is in another and the Executors for Coke are not allowed to ever be incontrol of both parts for the company’s survival. The coke plant in Atl is like an institution.

    When I lived there we visited it a lot (Dad had a friend there) and the manager said there was nothing like a Coca cola fresh off the line (and warm)

    When I moved up north it was a total reversal, unsweetened tea and Pepsi (with milk Like Laverene & Shirley)

    It’s just the southern way. ( Oh and #GoFalcons)

    Not to steal any thunder but I cannot wait to discuss last night’s episode including Kenya on WWHL and her….performance. WOW!

21. 21
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:31 pm

    @Classy-Yes Pete Carroll was in idiot yesterday!! If that jack ass hadn’t called a timeout, that Falcons Field goal would have been no good!! Plus if he would have gone for the field goal at the end of the first half the game would have been ours….But I digress. I know I was talking some smack about the Falcons. But I honestly didn’t think we would come back from being down 20-0…Russel Wilson is a RockStar in my book…He and his wife got to Seattle Children’s Hospital ever Tuesday to visit with the kids..

    I don’t know if it was the way they edited Kroy but usually he is pretty chill..IDK maybe it is my growing distaste for Kim that is doing it…Then again, During football season, I only watch Seattle games….

    Kenya is Looney!! I missed her “song” on WWHL….What is it with these bitches and songs?

22. 22
    Gypsy
    Posted January 14, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    zOMG! If it’s on bravotv.com PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go watch it!

    It’s puts the Cuntess to shame!

23. 23
    sagittariuskim
    Posted January 15, 2013 at 11:10 pm

    Here’s a video of Kenya “singing” her “song.”
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=615iZL4bZQE

24. 24
    Classy Drunk
    Posted January 16, 2013 at 11:30 am

    @Flipit and L Boogie…I can’t comment on the new recap again. You guys can’t tease me with the recap and not let me talk about it. I’m bored at work!!! WA-CHA (my cracking whip noise)

25. 25
    Gypsy
    Posted January 16, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    @Flipit & @Classy & @LBoogie please open the comments they’ll BE FABULOUS!

26. 26
    sarcasatire
    Posted January 16, 2013 at 12:35 pm

    This recap was hilarious, L-Boogie!! You find the right combination of snark and dead-wrong and I love it!

    I am addicted to Pepsi. I think because last semester kicked my butt and I needed constant caffeine. (I don’t drink coffee) I’m not sure about other parts of the South, but it seems Pepsi was prevalent enough in backwoods South Carolina for people to make it a ‘thing’ to drop salted peanuts in the bottle and drink it like that. I still don’t get that one..

    Coca Cola is everywhere. They infiltrate the smallest towns and dominate. All you see in third world countries is Coca Cola and Nestle. World domination!! (Last week, Bolivia announced they are expelling Coca Cola and McDonald from the country. Well…the still have coca leaves!)

27. 27
    L Boogie
    Posted January 16, 2013 at 7:53 pm

    Thanks guys. Just sent Flipit an email. I seriously don’t get why I have this computer shaped cloud raining on my recap parade >:(. This might send me into early retirement…bocagasm.com here I come!