RHOA Recap: Gone with the Wind

Recaps

By L Boogie | Wednesday, December 19, 2012 | 10:00 am | 23 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Real Housewives of Atlanta, Recaps

Porsha is clearly using the age issue to get under Kenya’s skin. It’s such a juvenile argument and it’s asinine because if Kenya’s accomplishment was so irrelevant to the ‘incredibly young’ Porsha, she wouldn’t have asked Kenya to come to the event wearing her crown and “sashay”. Also, Porsha is older than me, even if only by a year or so, so I know that heifer is completely aware of Kenya being Miss USA. I know it’s just a show but the argument was so 6th grade. I would give Porsha points for using the word tramp. Initially I thought it was classy but then I realized that the last movie she saw was probably Lady &The Tramp and she was just eager to show off her expanded vocabulary. The rest of the women look completely bored by this until they start getting in each other’s faces. Even then, Cynthia looks like it’s just another day at the office. If the office had a death match every other day.

The argument just keeps going. Porsha is irrelevant to Kenya, Porsha thinks that Kenya is a  hood rat, curb ass bitch whore from Detroit and can’t be in her circle, Kenya asks what the circumference of a circle is…


“Hold up! No one told me there was going to be a quiz!” 

You get the picture. I can’t even remember it all. The insults were hurtling back and forth so quickly I think they made Phaedra accidentally break into a sweat. Kenya eventually moves to another part of the outside area and tells the women that her grandmother raised her in a Christian way and she is no one’s whore. She flirts and smiles but would never actually act on any of the stuff she was saying. Well, unless the Phillipino was open to donating some sperm.

“Our baby would have had great eyes!”

Nene tells Kenya that she should have allowed Porsha to tell her side and then she should have told her side calmly. I love that Nene is giving advice on basically doing the exact opposite of what she did to become famous. She’s not dumb. She needs to make sure these new girls don’t outshine her too much so she can lock in her season 6 spot in case things don’t work out on NBC. Kenya makes the valid point that Porsha’s grandfather did his work 40 years ago and that doesn’t make him irrelevant. Unfortunately, she doesn’t realize that that is not the issue here. Porsha is just saying things to make her mad…and is also a spoiled little brat who thinks she’s the shit who’ll get a rude awakening when her ditziness isn’t as well received when she has to go to work after Kordell leaves her for Peter. Seriously, what 31 year old woman without kids brags that she doesn’t clean or work? I really think this girl is special, like Corky special. A few weeks ago, she held up three fingers when she said four, she doesn’t know the number of days in a year, she said her grandfather died in ’98 when it was ’00.

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23 Comments

  1. 1
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 11:25 am

    Kenya’s turn was so ridiculous and even more ridiculous the second time that all you could do was laugh. I am surprised that the ladies didn’t laugh right there in her face. I know I would have like “what the hell girl…did you just twirl…bitch, take your crazy self to bed.”

    The wedding was really sweet. Even though I don’t like Peter I still don’t think people should ruin the wedding day. So I am happy they got the redo.

    I have implemented the Walter cough in my day to day life when people ask me questions that I have no answer too because they came from bullshit. Thanks Wally!

  2. 2
    LAC LAC
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 11:47 am

    Wow… that I can feel a glimmer of genuine “awwwww, that’s sweet” from this show is saying something. The wedding redo was sweet and Peter was not a horse’s ass. It’s a festivus for the rest of us!

    Lord, crazy Kenya Crisco- the only cocktail she should be having is one with prescribed pills. Is this bitch cray cray or what? After all that screaming and the battle of idiots with Porsha, she ends her night sashaying, shanteing and claiming to be “gone with the wind” fabulous? The one movie that most black women look at and go “uhhhhhhhhh…yeah……it’s classic….” while trying to change the subject? Where does that come from? The only third shift in that room going on is Walter trying to stay awake in the bathtub and checking the lock and Kenya swirling around a Brides magazine, chanting.

    What is the point of the hair/makeup folks if that is the best that can be done?

    I love Phaedra’s reaction to any sort of fighting. Sidle up to the goodies and start nibbling.

  3. 3
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 11:58 am

    LAC I think white women have issues with doing African American hair. I used to get so mad watching makeover shows on Jenny Jones or Ricki Lake…AND…you know you watched too :) Any who I would watch the shows and think “did they put any heat on that girl’s hair?!?!?!” It looks like a freakin poof ball.

    So as I was watching the lady flat iron Porsche’s hair I said where is the traction? She’s not pulling anything straight like that and it would have needed to be SUPER straight to with stand the heat and humidity hence the curly hair for Kandi and Phaedra and the wigs for Cynthia.

  4. 4
    Lo
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    Has anyone heard else heard the talk about Walter going on a radio station last week and basically confessing that his relationship with Kenya was a set up. They dated years ago, and she called him up when she got booked on RHOA to fake the relationship? Girl, BYE http://www.crushable.com/2012/12/11/entertainment/walter-jackson-gay-kenya-moore-miss-usa-real-housewives-of-atlanta-rhoa-season-5-fake-relationship-boyfriend-girlfriend-cheating-bravo-producers/

  5. 5
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    @LAC….Glad you said it. Kenya embarassed herself something fierce saying that!

    LBoogie, “Seriously, what 31 year old woman without kids brags that she doesn’t clean or work?” I’d sat GG from Shahs brags about the same…but does she really count?

    I do love Phaedra soemthing fierce but, I will now forever look at her and say to myself, daym how did that church lady get herself such a hawt man! That’s sinful! She did look good with that high bun. Good call in the humidity!

  6. 6
    sagittariuskim sagittariuskim
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    Nene’s movie night comment during Kenya’s crazy twirl was great, but the highlight was definitely Phaedra’s church lady “alright, now”.

    And of course black people love a white party. White is the one color, that no matter how light or dark, all of us black people look good wearing. The only other race that comes close to looking as good in white in as we do, are the Latinos. There are times though when white can go wrong on black people. Like when my uncle got married. His wife-to-be who was Peter black decided to wear a frilly, fluffy, snow white wedding dress, that even a Disney princess would think was too much. But what do you expect from someone whose wedding colors were navy blue and burgundy red.

  7. 7
    LAC LAC
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 12:43 pm

    Classy! LOL!! Yes, I did watch it and I would be like, “get some oil and heat going on that hair, child or else don’t do it!” That is why I cling to my hairdresser like Kenya to a Zales jewelry display. He moves, I move… :)

  8. 8
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 12:50 pm

    navy blue and burgundy red!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! *gasp* “Peter black” @Sag, you are on posting punishment for even repeating such a story…HAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

    @LAC, I have gone all over the city for my hairdresser. I wouldn’t care where she lived.

    @LO, we went over that last week in the comments. Derek Hazelton posted a few youtube clips.

  9. 9
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 1:32 pm

    I;ve been with mine for 8 years she works a good 30 miles from where I live. NO JOKE.

  10. 10
    LAC LAC
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 1:42 pm

    Gypsy – I believe you, girl!!

  11. 11
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 7:28 pm

    @classy, thanks for the shout out! LOL, but this episode was so hysterical that I tweeted to @Flipit that this show is going downhill when the new girls steal “non-motherfucking factor” from Evelyn of Basketball Wives.

    So, I lost my job a few weeks ago, so I have nothing but time but to search for Youtube clips. BTW, did anyone else see Porscha on Wendy Williams this past week or maybe it was last week (the night after she was on WWHL) and she mentioned that one of her storylines this season is a miscarriage?

  12. 12
    fancivisage3000
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 8:08 pm

    She talked about it briefly at the OBGYN last week or the week before. Peter’s hubby, I mean her hubby was there with her. It was boring, just like Porsha.

  13. 13
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 20, 2012 at 5:15 am

    I saw that on Wendy yesterday also Derek. I hate you lost your job. People hire more in the first quarter so I hope you find something soon.

    And if I hear one more reality star say that someone is a non mutherfuckin factor I just might scream. I never thought it was all that clever when Eve first said it anyway.

  14. 14
    caligal
    Posted December 20, 2012 at 7:03 am

    Kenya is just so over the top dramatic, I had to laugh. Did she forget she was in Anguilla, and not a guest at Tara? I can hear Mammy now, “get along child, you ain’t never gonna land a man, acting like that!”

    Thanks for a great recap!

  15. 15
    AmyOops AmyOops
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 3:50 pm

    As usual I’m a little late to the party, but holy *shit* I almost fell out when reading this:

    “Excuse me for not knowing that U.S.A and America aren’t the
    same country. My grandfather did not believe in segregation! I don’t see color!”

    Ms. Boogie, I’ve posted a comment or two here at RHOA and never been acknowledged, but that is SO forgiven considering the quality recaps-man-ship shown here. That whole Kenya/Bambi conversation had me almost spewing Coca-Cola out of my nose. Well done! You may have just made my top five recappers list :-)

  16. 16
    AmyOops AmyOops
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 3:58 pm

    “I really think this girl is special, like Corky special. A few weeks ago, she held up three fingers when she said four, she doesn’t know the number of days in a year, she said her grandfather died in ’98 when it was ’00.”

    …and it just keeps getting better!

  17. 17
    AmyOops AmyOops
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 4:10 pm

    Sorry I’m comment crazy tonight…ah, hell, no one has been here in two days so I’m just amusing myself. LAC said:

    “The only third shift in that room going on is Walter trying to stay awake in the bathtub and checking the lock and Kenya swirling around a Brides magazine, chanting.”

    Holy shit I love the Gasm and my fellow Gasmii. Laughter truly is the best medicine for the end of a shitty-ass-freezing-cold-in-Florida weekend WORKday.

  18. 18
    L Boogie
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    AmyOops, comment away! I was literally thinking today that I feel so bad about not talking back. Ever since my tenants decided not to pay for their internet, I haven’t had internet. The only way to get on is through my cell or tablet and it takes forever. Verizon works great everywhere except my house!! Even when I type the recaps, it literally takes an extra hour or two b/c the service is so spotty. I LOVE reading comments though. It’s a windy, freezing Saturday night in NJ and, well, I have no life :-) . I’m glad you enjoy…and yes, the comments crack me up too!

  19. 19
    L Boogie
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 4:41 pm

    While I’m on here, @classy drunk I love anything that references Jenny Jones. I miss those “I went from Geek to Chic” episodes. You guys remember the Rio infomercial? If I’d had money and parental permission, I would’ve been all over that. I can straighten my hair and snack on it?! It was a relief from the mess you’d see on talk show makeover episodes. Even on ANTM the hairdressers didn’t know what to do with that girl’s hair the first season. I think it was Ebony? And Derek, sorry to hear that :-( . I didn’t see Porsha but I heard she tried to kiss up to women over 40. Thanks for reading and commenting guys!

  20. 20
    AmyOops AmyOops
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 5:34 pm

    Oh, damn, L Boogie. NJ? Somehow I don’t feel so cold anymore…

    Oh, and I feel ya on the internet thing. No sweat :-)

  21. 21
    thisbuggs4u
    Posted December 22, 2012 at 6:35 pm

    LBoogie, We have Verizon, and don’t get reception in our house as well. Mr Z looked up the coverage area online and we are well in the coverage area. It is just we are in a bunch of trees. He called and we got a Verizon wireless router….for free. It is much better being able to walk around the house and do thing while talking on the phone then having to sit in 1 room and not move and inch.

  22. 22
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 5:57 am

    Hey guys! I can’t comment on the new RHOA recap.

  23. 23
    L Boogie
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 5:49 pm

    Hey classy, trying to figure it out.Thanks!

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