RHONYC: Alex! You’re turning violet, Alex!

26 Comments

1. 1
   whoochile
   Posted July 2, 2011 at 12:30 pm

   Haven’t watched this epi yet, but you are hysterical!!! Thanks for a great recap

2. 2
   Lola
   Posted July 2, 2011 at 12:46 pm

   I personally found this episode to be HI-larious! Poor Sonja is such a hot mess & I’d feel bad ragging on her if she hadn’t shown us all season what a little twerp she really is… So to start, if homegirl had no problem reaching her hand into the toilet, why the ef call a plumber?! And then insist he not charge you for his time since you did it yourself?!? And I’m also having a problem with her latest single “I have no help” b!tch you have no job, you need no help! I also couldn’t get over her trying the FS expert that she’s such a “hard worker” (what work?!) & such a “team player” (what team?!) getting a little tired of her latest party themes being pity parties. Then the joint bday!!! 1. Why would Ramona be showing off those dumpy invitations? I know, it was because there were 2 glasses of booze – she could have tossed that clip art onto a burger king bag & thought it was genius 2. Did sonja’s dream “co-party” include a bachelorette style receiving line? Who am I kidding, of course it did 3. Did they use that extra room for anything aside pics? Lastly, this might have been my fave Kelly episode – I’m loving free range Kelly where she gets to say all this nutty stuff & no one tries to get her to rationalize. I hope the meantweets find their way to the reunion!!!!

3. 3
   classy drunk
   Posted July 2, 2011 at 6:20 pm

   When the girls were talking shit about Simon and Luann kept
   Saying “how low can you go? How low can you go?” I had this
   Irresistible urge to Cha Cha slide…

   I really liked Ramoner’s dress at the birthday party.

4. 4
   Florence
   Posted July 2, 2011 at 9:07 pm

   Classy drunk I hear ya! The best dancer at saint Bernadettes (with the worst reputation )

5. 5
   mamadoc
   Posted July 3, 2011 at 3:09 am

   Simon’s coat makes him look like he belongs in “The Matrix”. I quit watching this series. Watching a bunch of middle aged hags have junior high drama was too trifling to do alone. That’s why I still look forward to the recaps. It’s like I’m watching with a friend, knocking back some Pinot Grigio, and laughing my ass off.

6. 6
   mamadoc
   Posted July 3, 2011 at 3:11 am

   BTW- Lola- “Free Range Kelly”- Priceless!

7. 7
   eurotra$h
   Posted July 3, 2011 at 9:11 am

   Simon is so lame.I would ignore him completely, since thats his biggest fear. To be ignored and unseen. And Cindy is probably one of the most uncomfortable/incapable mothers i have witnessed. She gave birth to those angels and the hospital actually allowed her to take them home?! lol @ “free range Kelly.

8. 8
   Fnord
   Posted July 3, 2011 at 7:10 pm

   So apparently the Pinot Grigio grape is a clone of the Pinot Gris grape, which is itself a mutant version of Pinot Noir… So Rammy’s favorite wine is based on the clone of a mutant grape. How appropriate!

9. 9
   LastCall
   Posted July 4, 2011 at 1:44 am

   I don’t do twitter or facebook or any of that stuff, and I didn’t know what “mean tweeting” was, so I did some research. Well, it seems that if anybody from this show is guilty of “mean tweeting” it’s Jill and not Simon. A number of websites and blogs have recently investigated Jill’s claims that Simon and others were cyber-bullying her, and pretty much everyone came to the same conclusion; Jill is totally lying. Turns out she herself has a long and well documented history of attacking people online. Allegedly she also has her lackeys threaten bloggers and other people who say anything negative about her. She even got caught using fake names to leave horrible reviews on Amazon for Bethenny and SIlex’s books while praising her own. This time I guess she figured it she publicly accused Simon of some nasty thing that she herself does, it would keep the spotlight off her own crimes. And it did do that too. For about a minute. Now it’s backfired because the proof is out there for everyone to see.

   And for the record, as creepy as he may be, all evidence suggests Simon’s not much of a “mean tweeter” at all. The only “mean” tweets anyone could find from him were in response to other people’s attacks, and even those were pretty mild. Kelly is suddenly saying he mean tweets her all the time just like he does to Jill. The truth is that evidently, at some point, Kelly had a big problem with twitter. Somebody hacked her account or starting using her name or something like that, and she was in a panic. Guess who helped her out and showed her what she need to do to fix the situation. That’s right, old mean-tweeting Simon volunteered to help her. He comes to Kelly’s rescue and then she turns around and falsely accuses him of nasty things She’s not just crazy. She’s also bitchy.

   Anyhow, next episode should be fun. Looks like we get to see the blondes refusing to take part in LuAnn’s new video. I’ve watched that horror on youtube, and let me tell you, those blondes really dodged a bullet. Jill, Kelly and that albino midget “music producer” of LuAnn’s are background dancers in the video. Oy gevalt! At least her first song was fun in that one could easily snark on it. This one is just plain sad. I would have called it humiliating, but clearly LuAnn doesn’t have enough self-awareness to be humiliated by anything she’s done. I think she truly thinks she’s the next Countess GaGa.

10. 10
    Sunshine
    Posted July 4, 2011 at 5:41 am

    @lastcall, I agree. I read a bunch of other blogs and they all say the same thing. I also read alex’s blog on bravo.com and she explained it very well. Plus she shows proof unlike Kelly & Jill.

11. 11
    Tmurda
    Posted July 4, 2011 at 12:17 pm

    These HW shows all consist of unbelievable immaturity and childish behavior by all cast members, but I gotta say that these NY bitches take the cake when it comes to that shit. ALL THEY DO all day long is gossip and bully each other. They are the one group of HWs that take the childish bullshit to a level that rendurres the show absent of any REAL entertainment value, IMO. They’re just sad. Up until recently, I loathed Kelley and prayed weekly for someone to somehow put an end to her denial reguarding her mental instability and bullshit, but her lunacy has transformed into something i’m diggin’. Lastly, sorry to all you twitter users, but I think twitter is the dumbest, most pointless, most pretentious waste of time ever created. Perfect thing for people like Simon to use to make him feel important.

12. 12
    hbgchick
    Posted July 4, 2011 at 1:38 pm

    I’m so all about lunch. I love lunch, especially at a decent restaurant. I’d go to lunch with someone I hate just to have lunch (assuming she is paying). I’m serious.

13. 13
    mere2142
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 6:48 am

    Really Cyndi? A table of three adults couldn’t take care of one baby for an hour? You had to call for reinforcements? I’m wondering if she has ever spent a moment alone with her kids. She is dead to me which isn’t really saying much – she hardly registered on my radar to begin with.

    BBitz you are hysterical. What’s the mean tweet count up to now?

14. 14
    classy drunk
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 7:53 am

    @Mere, Cyndi must have been raised by nannies also because I think most grand mothers would have taken the child off of the mother’s hands for a moment at least. The grandparents didn’t even seem at all concerned that she only brought one of the twins.

    Now that’s is weird Kelly…

15. 15
    mere2142
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 8:22 am

    @classy Ah I think you make a good point! In my family if a baby is being fussy we just pass the kid around the table for a while so everyone can have a chance to eat and the parents get a break. Cyndi seemed shocked that the baby was grabbing everything in reach on the table. I don’t have children but I know that a one year old is going to get their hands on whatever is close and put it in their mouth!

    Still laughing @ ‘Free Range Kelly’. It is suspect that no one calls Kelly on her crazy this season.

16. 16
    Sassygrl72
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 10:01 am

    @LastCall…I actually follow the housewives on Twitter (makes the episodes more fun) and Jill is 24/7 slamming someone. She has balls crying that others are mean to her when she is the meanest mean girl around.

17. 17
    toomuchtv
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 2:03 pm

    Thanks for clarifying LastCall. Simon may be weird and wants camera time like they all do, but he is not MEAN like LuAnne, Jill, and Kelly. I tend to believe his and Alex’s explanation for this tweeting business. Who knows what is going on with his wardrobe but at least he tries to be creative and doesn’t take himself so seriously as the women.

18. 18
    shana
    Posted July 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm

    I liked when Lumann said, “Alex…needs to put a leash on Simon, she needs to control what he is doing…”just like she did with her husband, right? She controlled him right out the door.

19. 19
    shana
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 6:24 am

    BBitz, you are absolutely right!

    That dual birthday party totally started out just being for Sonja, and then Ramona couldn’t keep her grubby paws off it. Ramona made it look like adding on Sonja was an afterthought, but Sonja smartly hinted at the truth in the slide-show room. When she asked Ramona how she got all of Sonja’s friends that are usually gone by this time of year to come to the party–the only real answer of course, is that Ramona must have contacted them a while back, when the party was originally just for Sonja. More proof–the ASPCA gift giving. That was probably set up before news of Sonja being bankrupt came out. Notice how Ramona’s gifts weren’t going to a charity (at least it wasn’t mentioned on the show).

    More on Ramona, what a hypocrite! What right does she have of being upset about Jill (or anyone else) not inviting her to the focus group? In the very first episode of RHONY, Jill was kvetching about not being invited to Ramona’s cooking party in the Hamptons and Ramona was defending herself, saying that you just can’t invite everyone. But not when everyone includes her, apparently.

    Did you notice BBitz that Ramona not only told that lady that she isn’t a part of the receiving line for Sonja, but she took her rose away too!!

    The “I Hate Jill Zarin” Website was started during a time when Jill was being BEYOND AWFUL. I mean, even more awful than now. Bravo wasn’t telling the ‘behind the scenes’ stuff, some of which did come out in the reunion show–like how Bethany never knew Bobby was sick, etc., but other things, like how Jill was cyber-bullying a well respected critic for not liking her book–a book she sent him to review in the first place, was not allowed to be mentioned. I think she called the reviewer an anti-semite for not liking the book. Meanwhile, on the Bravo Blogs, all we were seeing was blogs about how wonderful Jill is. And any blogs stating the contrary weren’t published. Very Frustrating. The ‘author’ of the blog loves Simon and Alex and that is why they are a part of the blog at all. Jill would have a point about Simon bullying her and not taking her side if Simon had gone looking for this blogger and then put up a bunch of nasty stuff–Jill style, but he didn’t. And, most importantly, at the time the website was started, Jill was being really, really mean to Alex. Like Lumann is acting toward her now.
    I get why Simon contributed, however fleetingly, to the anti-Jill blog: when someone shows up at your door (book-signing), and tells you that they think your arch enemy is a pig and that you are the best–and that they have started a website stating all of this, well, let’s just say, I don’t see Jill saying no to it if the shoes were on the other feet (of course it would never happen, as no one but Oblivious Bobby adores her).

    As far as the tweeting goes, I tried to read some of Kelly’s tweets last season after scary island, but they were so crazy and delusional it was hard to follow. The only other tweeting I read was Assley’s from the RHONJ, following the hair pulling episode with Danielle and they were tweet-meaning each other. Reading Assley’s tweets, which were covered in ‘hahahaas’ and stupid wisecracks, caused me to lose so many brain cells, that out of fear of becoming too stupid to function (like her), I stopped with tweeting all together. So I can only say this regarding the mean tweeting–coming from Kelly, Jill and Lumann, it is entirely possible that it is the case of ‘she who smelt it; dealt it.’

    I hate it when Jill, Kelly or Lumann refers to themselves as if they were the entire cast. The “you’ll be iced out” comment from Kelly only referred to her being iced out by the three witches. Hardly a loss.

    I do not think there is a redeemable character on this show, they are all awful, but IMO, Lumann is the worst. If she misuses “I” when she should say “Me” one more time, I am likely to throw a shoe at the tv. It is expected when Ramona, Jill or Kelly does it, but when Lumann shows her ignorance, it is even harder to stomach. It grates on the ears hearing her fake accent butcher grammar while she is speaking down to someone.

20. 20
    shana
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 6:30 am

    Also loved the Mommy Dearest reference, I can totally see Ramona raging, eyes popping, screaming “WIRE HANGERS? WIRE HANGERS!!” Awesome.

21. 21
    classy drunk
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 8:08 am

    Would Ramoner’s eyes actually be “popping” or would those just be her regular Tuesday eyes?

22. 22
    mycousinrachel
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 10:35 am

    I think I almost fell off the sofa the time I heard LuAnn say,”Alls I know is…”! It’s one of those phrases that drives me crazy when I hear it, but hearing it from countess superior really had me laughing.

23. 23
    TV Junkie
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 4:25 pm

    As I said on last week’s comments.. how about a I hate Ramona, Simon and Alex website ..why stop with Jill ..they are all horrible , low class creatures!!!

24. 24
    Shana
    Posted July 6, 2011 at 9:53 pm

    Amen, TV Junkie.

25. 25
    Spelling Counts
    Posted July 7, 2011 at 8:38 pm

    Shana: You have written my thoughts! Did you catch when, during her lunch/meeting with Alex, Countess Lumann came out with the word “I’s”? I think she was telling Alex not to get involved in “Ramona and I’s business”….. I suppose the word ‘my’ is classless. She’s an ignorant snob.

26. 26
    Celchi
    Posted July 7, 2011 at 9:25 pm

    I Believe Simon does mean tweet. I hope he paid those people enough who said he doesn’t. why would he say to Jill WATCH OUT? That is a threat. All because she would not have LUNCH WITH HIM? And what the hell is Jill’s big crime that he is not over. to say his kids are out of control? well, Duh! Alex seems to have been doing her best last season and this one to play the victim and ALL I see her doing is running around saying Jill is talking behind everyone’s back –
    she wants more airtime – I believe she and Simon hired a consultant or someone to tell them how to make themselves more interesting. I meant the perv thing they got going is a bit boring. AND if Simon really want to be a housewife on this show tell him to go get something done about those suitcases under his eyes. I am exhausted just looking at him. I LIKE Jill, LuAnn and Kelly. Sonja- needs a reality grip – and some underwear. Honestly, how can you NOT know you have no underwear on? Ramona constantly promoting her grossly over priced jewelry – and Alex thinking she is a beauty – maybe in goth circles. I get a big kick out of Kelly though. What a Hoot she has turned out to be. LOVE HER. Jill – I Would love a friend like her – she did ALOT of S and A – Obviously they have aligned themselves with someone who even though on the skids has old money social connections (Sonja) the former Mrs. Morgan and Ramona who seems to have money coming out of her ..uh hum. They are two dimensional social climbers.