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Monday, May 16, 2011
8:00 am
35 Comments
Tagged: bbitz, bravo, Bride of Frankenstein, carol channing, Chris March, cindy, eleventy, funny, Gossip Slife, Indigo Girls, Jill Zarin, Joan Jett, Joan Rivers, lady gaga, Mr. Ed, Pamela Anderson, pinot grigio, project runway, Ralph Lauren, Ramona Singer, real housewives of new jersey, real housewives of nyc, recap, RHONYC, Rihanna, Scarlett O'Hara, scott slifer, Sex & The City 2, SlifeGoesOn, sonja, spoof
Gossip Slife here. Your one and only source for- wait a freakin’ minute!! This isn’t Gossip Girl! This is Real Housewives of NYC. And I’m not bBitz! WTF? It’s true, gasmii. That damn ginger decided to go on vacay, so I’m filling in this week. I’m guessing he went to Australia. I hear it’s very popular with redheads. (Winky face!) Anyhoo, I have some mayjah shoes to fill, and I’m not as good with the graphic pics, but I’ll still do my best to make you pee yourselves a little from laughing.
The episode opens in typical fashion with yet another photo shoot. Googly eyed Ramona needs some pics of herself to hawk her crappy skin care line. Her biggest fear though is that she’ll come off looking too stiff. As in, like a corpse. Of course, each picture is worse than the next, and her assistant Melissa has no problem telling her so.
Hideous!
Joan Rivers, is that you?
When Sonja shows up, Ramona has to brag that her photographer has also shot Rihanna and Lady Gaga, aka real celebrities. And actual attractive people. “Well, aren’t WE special!” Sonja smirks in interview. Shut up, snatch! Don’t be jelly! Then Sonja has to brag about how her Ralph Lauren jeans make her ass look amazing, and I SO WANTED Ramona in interview to say back, “Well, aren’t WE special!” Stupid Bravo!
As the shoot progresses, Melissa tells Ramona that she looks like “a young Pamela Anderson.” WTF?! On what planet?! Where gravity doesn’t exist?? I think Melissa should use that new raise she’s gonna get from that compliment to buy herself some glasses.
More like Pamela Anderson’s grandmother.
Jill comes over to Cindy’s apartment and immediately starts ragging on the place for being overrun by 2 babies, 4 nannies, and 18 assistants… all of whom just happen to be very attractive young girls for Cindy to look at all day. They move to the kitchen to eat muffins where Jill laughs that she eats with her hands, a trait she learned from her mother. Hands, claws… same thing! Jill then also reveals her biggest regret in life was only having one child. Geez, way to make your daughter feel totally worthless, you bitch!
Don’t ever get between Jill and her carbs. She’ll cut you!
Cindy then catches Jill up to speed on her disastrous meeting with Ramona last week, where she kind of exaggerates Ramona’s insanity a teensy bit. Jill is like a giddy school girl to finally hear that she’s not alone in her disgust and hatred of Ramona, and can’t wait for everyone else to come clean about how they really feel about her, so they can all take her down. Wow.
Now that they’ve bonded, Cindy wants to go to an Indigo Girls concert with Jill.
Side note: What does everyone think of the commercial for the new season of Real Housewives of New Jersey? I can’t get that damn song they play in it out of my head! “Get loose!” I find myself strutting around my condo like Caroline going, “YAH FAMILEE! FIX DIS!” Get loose! Anyone else? Just me? Ok…
PROSTITUTION WHORE!
Sonja invites over Bravo-lebrity Chris March of Project Runway fame to help her design a costume for this fab masquerade she’s throwing. First off, Chris March, I love you, but you are as big as a house! Now that you’re famous, you can’t afford a little lipo?? A home delivery diet meal plan? Atleast a gym membership! Speaking of gyms, Sonja apologizes for her attire – she just got back from spin class. Um, she’s wearing an Hermes pashmina and thigh high boots. Was this bike made out of 24K gold? Anyhoo, Sonja’s desperate for Chris to help her salvage this shiteous old powder wig of hers that looks like a dead poodle crossed with Carol Channing’s merkin.
If Chris wasn’t gay before, he certainly is now!
Jill and LuMan meet up at some costume shop to find outfits for Sonja’s party. Right away, Jill bitches that she’s sick and her throat hurts. Maybe from talking so much shit on everyone?? Speaking of, they see a matronly dress and agree that it would be POIFECT for Ramona. The Countess starts braying like a donkey. She has the sense to point out they are being catty, even if they can’t help themselves.
Is there a 12-step program for being bitchy?
Jill picks a boring blue dress, and LuMan goes for a Scarlett O’Hara frock.
Money can’t buy you class, but it can buy you a ton of feathers and a hot glue gun!
Back at Sonja’s, she looks like Martha frickin’ Washington in her ratty old get-up. Chris looks terrified – and sweaty. On his way out, he bitches that he needs an elevator, and Sonja tells him that she has one, but she only uses it to store cleaning supplies! HA! Poor fat bastard!
Over at newbie Cindy’s house… and I use the term “newbie” loosely…as loose as the sallow flesh hanging from her bones. She’s eleventy if she’s a day. And I’m pretty sure she’s a closet lez. Aside from how irresponsible it is to have kids at her age, I was horrified to watch her, her incestuous gay brother, and her babies’ daddy Kevin play with the twins. There is so much awkward tension in the scene, probably because they are all gay, and no one wants to come clean about it. Kevin and Howie act like bitter, old, queeny exes, and Cindy’s the lesbian hag caught in the middle.
Cockward!
Major gay face.
On the day of her party, Sonja is barking orders at her live-in manservant, Michael. She wants her jasmine tea in a blue and white cup, on a tray, with rice milk or almond milk. You know, none of that old-fashioned crap that comes from a cow. She then explains to us that her divorce has been financially hard on her, so it’s nice to take in young strays (aka her friends’ grown children) and allow them to stay with her in exchange for indentured servitude, and probably sexual favors.
Run, Michael, run!!
Sonja is so overwhelmed when Chris March returns with her new and improved costume that she nearly has a stroke in her pink caftan. She totally has a brain fart and forgets his name for several seconds, but luckily saves herself and gushes over the mask and wig, which frankly, makes her look like the Bride of Frankenstein. But Sonja loves it, and I love her, because she’s so raw and honest, she blurts out, “I am all into me! I am loving myself!” And ain’t that the truth!
It’s hair-raising alright!
Side note on Sonja: This bitch just cracks me up. She wears sporty knee high socks, commissioned a painting of herself, understands the importance of a pecking order, keeps a well-stocked stable of men whose names she can barely remember, and loves the gays almost as much as she loves herself. No wonder I identify so much with her. I AM HER!
In the limo on the way to the party, LuMan calls Sonja and tells her that regrettably, she can’t come cuz she’s sick. No doubt because that disease-ridden Jill Zarin coughed all over her at the costume shop. Oh, well! That’s what you get for being a total rag, Countess! Sonja is sad that she won’t get to see LuMan in costume, because she would have come as some unbelievably leggy, statuesque character like Josephine Baker or Grace Jones. Um, pause while I laugh hysterically.
One of these things is not like the other.
Sonja arrives at the party, (natch, at her fave spot, Cipriani’s) drunk off her ass, and announces that drank a lot of “shampoo” on the way there.
I think you meant champagne, sweetie!
Also drunk off her ass when she walks in is Ramona, who stumbles even while she’s being escorted!
Where’s my Pinot Grigio?!
Ramona spots Alex dressed as Cleopatra and goes, “I didn’t recognize you! You look so good!” LMAO. So, basically you just told her that on a daily basis, Alex looks like crap! Genius!
Cleopatra comin’ atcha!
Jill comes in, looking pretty matronly herself there, and immediately starts bashing Sonja’s party in interview, because it was small, cramped, there weren’t very many people, everyone looked ridiculous, there were only two trays a food, and the bar was tiny. She feels that Sonja’s money would be better spent on fewer, more lavish parties. Now, to be fair, everything Jill says is accurate. But it’s also unnecessary and uncalled for.
I don’t see you throwing any parties lately, bitch!
Kelly’s there, too, with a big dumb bow on her head, but she’s pretty much nonexistent the whole whole party. The whole episode, really!
The party’s fairly dull. The best part comes when Sonja realizes that she forgot to put her petticoat on under her dress, and that her nasty, cottage cheese ass has been hanging out in plain sight the entire time!!
Full moon.
Reactions form the peanut gallery.
Close your mouth, dear. You look like a cod fish.
Realization sets in. ”I thought it was drafty in here!”
Jill feels bad and doesn’t want people laughing at Sonja, but then proceeds to tell everyone at the party about the huge bruise she saw on Sonja’s ass. Real nice, Jill.
The next day, Cindy goes in to get her whack grill fixed at the dentist, and she brings “bff” Jill along. Jill is quick to remind her new bestie that she took a day off from work for this! A whole day?! For an hour at the dentist? Way to bend over backwards, Jill. Jill, in her infinite kindness, wisdom, and unprofessional DDS opinion, proceeds to tell the doc how to do his job in order minimize Cindy’s horsy choppers. Cindy balks from the onslaught of insults as Jill basically takes over her mouth and her life.
Joan Jett and Mr. Ed’s love child.
Over at Serafina, Jill is throwing herself a lil party to hawk her new line of Ramona Singer Pinot Grigio. She prefers her pinot chilled, but “even warm it tastes good going down.” Bwahaha! That’s what she tells her husband! Jennifer, aka The Bride, shows up, and THIS is where the rest of the episode starts to spin out of control…
The Bride tells Ramona that on the day of her wedding, Jill pulled her aside and accosted her about Alex and Simon, wanting to know why they were invited and how she knew them. Ramona is shocked, but could care less. Time to get to the more important issues. “What did she say about me?!” Ramona begs. The Bride says Jill doesn’t like the fact that she and Ramona are friends. Now Ramona is the one saying that she’s put up with Jill’s crap for years and she’s sick of it.
You can count the rings on her neck like she’s a tree.
The rest of the “gals” show up. Alex makes a joke about what a lush Ramona is. LuMan starts grilling Ramona about her wine: how it’s made, how it’s stored, if it’s an “estate wine” etc. You know booze hound Ramona doesn’t know shit about her own wine except that it tastes good and it numbs the pain when she wakes up and looks at herself in the mirror every morning. Ramona practically belches in her own mouth when she tells LuMan that she’s at a party right now, and this isn’t the time to get into the technicalities of wine. Um, HELLUR?! It’s a party FOR YOUR WINE!!
LuMan detects a crisp, clean hint of bullshit in this blend.
Ramona spots Jill across the party, and her head nearly explodes she’s so frazzled. So she pulls Jill aside to have a word with her.
“There’s something in mah EYEEEE!”
And now, the piece de resistance! An epic bantam weight division brawl between frenemies Jill and Ramona. You knew it was comin’! The tension had been brewing since Jill got back from Australia and promised to keep her fat, gossiping mouth shut. (Yeah, that didn’t last long at ALLLL.) Ramona wastes no time in launching into Jill with the intel she received from The Bride about what Jill was saying behind her back. Of course, Jill goes on the defense and wants The Bride to get her ass over and say this to her face! Just then, some old ‘mo ass-clown tries to butt in, and I’m like, DO YOU NOT SEE THERE’S A TELEVISED FIGHT GOING ON HERE, DUMMY?! Where was the producer to keep him from meddling?!
Eff off, you old queen!
The ladies dismiss him and his “tempting” pizza, and get right back to fighting, with Jill screaming, “It’s not true!” and Ramona responding by guzzling her Pinot. Jill feels ambushed, and tells Ramona, “You have no class!” before storming off. Wait! Aren’t they supposed to end every fight with, “I’M DONE!” Hmm. Maybe they’re not done? Maybe they’re just getting warmed up!
Drink the pain away!
NO CLASS!
She looks like a blow up doll!
Ramona looks like she’s having a stroke, and forces Alex to feel her heartbeat. Yup. Shriveled up and on life support, but it’s still there.
Jill throws on her fab coat and tears out of the party, where she JUST HAPPENS to run into The Bride. “I was just mauled by THE DOG Ramona Singer,” she laments. LOL. She rips into The Bride for running her mouth, and still swears she never said it, that it was all some other drunk bitch. That is, until The Bride’s all, “No, at the end of the wedding, when you came up to me-” And you see this look on Jill’s face as if the light bulb just went on and she’s all, “Oh, shiz! I DID say all that crap!” It takes her all of two seconds to flip the tables on The Bride by saying, “Next time you have a problem with me, just say it to my face,” and she swallows The Bride into a giant hug in order to shut her up before the cameras catch any other damning evidence. And it’s because of this moment that I’m forced to side with crazy old Ramona and her bug eyes on this one.
Busted!
For whatever asinine reason, Jill feels compelled to come BACK to the party to tell Ramona that all is well between her and The Bride again. Ramona’s like, “How the hell does that help me get another glass of Pinot?” Jill offers to sit down to lunch with Ramona so they can air out all of their MANY problems.
Maybe if it’s a liquid lunch!
Ramona tells Jill she needs to shut her frickin’ mouth, and Jill tells Ramona that she has serious mental problems. Ramona runs off sobbing in the direction of the wine.
While Ramona drunkenly vents to The Bride about what a backstabbing ‘ho Jill is, Jill sits outside in her town car crying to LuMan, who automatically just sides with Jill.
You weren’t even there, Countess!
“She’s such an evil bitch!” Jill cries. In the funniest moment of the episode, she goes, “Here, give this tah Ramona next time you see hah. Bitch. I’ll never talk to hah again!” And what is she handing LuMan? Frickin’ tchotchkies from Australia!! First she gives Alex a plastic bag of crap for her kids, and now this?! Is this what she means by “class?” What a joke! And then come my favorite words:
“I’M DONE!” (Yeah right, crocodile tears!)
Yes! There it is!! The poignant end of yet another fight, and yet another friendship. DUN DUN DUN!! The stage has been set for an epic showdown between the blondes and the brunettes next week when The Countess (with a producer holding a gun to her head) invites all the “girls” to Morocco. Oh, brother! It didn’t work for Sex & The City 2, and it sure as shit ain’t gonna work for these old broads either! But I still can’t wait for the dramz! Leave your questions and comments, and bBitz will be back next week!! Xoxo
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35 Comments
Nice Recap! Ok here is the thing, I would think that if you are going to “forget” to put on your ruffled panties, wouldn’t you atleaste ask your make up artist to cover up that bruise on your ASS before you walk out the door?!
And Kelly really? Really? Your nasty ass wears skirts and dresses shorter then that!
Sonja was so out of her mind at her “masquerade” party. Oh oops I forgot my ruffled panties? That she felt necessary to announce LOUDLY to the entire party? I mean seriously she was wandering around her penthouse and sitting on her ass the whole time in that party bus and didn’t feel a breeze?
Hy-sterical recap!!
Those chompers of Joan Jett need to be taken down a notch, I about peed my pants when Jill was trying to get the dentist to decrease the number of chicklets exposed when she smiles.
I do think it was ridiculously inappropriate for Ramona to talk to Jill at the wine launch. I think the old queen was offering the papa john’s to try and snap these two rottweilers out of their fight. How bizarre to start a fight at one’e own business party. That being said, I do loves me the ramonacoaster though.
Jill really is a delusional cunt. I can’t believe she has the balls to write this on her blog.
“Cindy said, “We have our ups and lows” (she meant downs), but we accept Ramona for who she is. What the heck does that mean? Why would anyone accept someone who makes so many condescending remarks and offers little respect to anyone?”
Jill I think that you better ask this of your “friends” because they seem to accept you even those you are always condescending, completely disrespectful, and are a huge liar. I will always be on team Ramona because she at least has a modicum of self awareness and compassion. Jill is just a complete fake and phony. Everything that she has done this season is motivated by her desire to pay back Ramona for last year’s dismal of Jill at scary island.
Also I think that Jill is paying people to write comments on her blog over on Bravo’s site. There is no way that she would get as many glowing comments if she wasn’t paying people to be her fans. I would love for anyone on the cast to tell Jill that they don’t respect her because they aren’t one of her fans.
It bothers me that Sonja wears bows in hair. It is like she thinks that it makes her look young and fetching, but it just makes her look like a pathetic cougar. She is better than that. Or maybe not.
I sense a definate attempt by Jill, Luann and Kelly to paint Ramona as an out of control alcoholic. They are constantly mentioning how much Ramona has had to drink, alluding to her drinking *again* and so forth. Plus they keep feeding Kellys delusion that she was perfectly normal on Scary Island and was merely bullied into what exactly? A psychotic break?! Dangerous shit going down in NY housewifeland — allegations of alcoholism could destroy Ramonas many businesses and pretending Kelly is normal can also blow up in everyones faces. But then isn’t this what Jill did to Alex in the first season? Many comments regarding Simons ‘drinking’ and never clearly defined ‘problems’ cost him (or almost so) his job. Jill is not merely a cunt, she is a dangerous, self righteous slag.
Oh, and Cindy just has to be Joey Ramones long lost sister. Surely nature wouldn’t beget that look twice (thrice if you count Howard Stern)without some dna linkage.
But isn’t that what Kyle did to Kim? She kept bringing up Kim’s drinking and ‘problem’ yet we never witnessed Kim with a glass in her hand. On the other hand, we hardly see Ramona *without* a glass in her hand. I think she was worse last season..”It’s turtle time!” And kissing the Hooters guy on the lips..Ramona is a mess. An entertaining mess, but a mess just the same. If I ever were to meet her, I’d show up with a bottle in my hand. Call me an enabler, but I’m just down for a good time!
Speaking of druggies….ever since I saw Sonja walking around with a purse in her own house, I was suspicious that it was so she could keep her drugs close by. Now, after seeing her run around with her ass hanging out, swollen and bruised, I’m almost convinced she is on that stuff. Cocaine is a helluva drug! LOL
I wish Cindy was wittier. Clearly she thinks these ladies are ridiculous but she can’t articulate a single thought so she just stares blankly into space. “Fight or Flight” syndrome…seems like Cindy chooses flight and goes off to her “happy place.” (You know, the place where she and Howie are frolicking in the fields, holding hands and laughing, their horse teeth glaring brighter than the sun. *sigh*)
@sarcasatire, I wish Cindy were more interesting. That picture you paint of her and Howie is way more entertaining than anything she has ever done or said on the show. As for Ramona, I agree that she is an entertaining mess. I don’t think that she is the alcoholic that they are trying to paint her as though. I honestly don’t think she drinks anymore than the Countess does. I did think Luanne’s questioning at the wine tasting was funny. Because when Ramona did successfully answer a question, Luanne was cutting her off to ask another one. Luanne wanted to stump her, which it’s Ramona! Why even bother? Ramona gets flustered by dust bunnies. There is no real challenge in that type of situation.
I would love to see Luanne turn her evil ways on Jill. I know it will never happen since they are besties, but that would be sooo much more entertaining than anything Cindy is bringing to the show.
Doesn’t Cindi’s baby daddy look like that guy from SNL? His name eludes me right now but that’s all I could think of when he was on the screen.
Bill Hader! Thank you imdb.
I love that Jill felt bad for Sonja throwing such a sad little party. And anyone notice how many things LuMan doesn’t show up at. Does she have a different contract than the rest of them that gets her out of these events?
@mere: Luann doesn’t even live in NYC anymore. She had to move way out to the Hamptons as that was the only property she got in the divorce. So, for most events, she’s 2.5 hrs away and Bravo doesn’t think it’s worth it to put her up in a hotel unless she’s coming to show up Ramona or French kiss Jacques.
@Plathaddict: Yes, a Jill vs Luann showdown would be epic. Next season, perhaps?
@sarcasatire: Fingers crossed!
But mon cherie, I thought The Cuntess had a pied a terre in the city.
@Amy, last season they showed her looking but she never settled on a place because what she could actually afford (downtown) was not to her usual standards (UES) so rather than display an obvious fall from grace, I think she stayed in a hotel suite (most likely paid for by Bravo). She probably spends her nights in the city at Jacques’ these days, as Ramona pointed out, she’s just a weekend mom.
First page already has me cracking up! My goal is to tell someone this week, “Shut up, snatch!” Also, “hands, claws…” Priceless.
I have to get this off my chest.
Chrissie Hynde…Cindy looks like a better fed, less eyeliner wearing Chrissie Hynde. It kills me to say this because Chrissie Hynde is the epitome of cool.
In what way is it irresponsible for a woman to have children in her 40s. No one would say that about a man!
Cindy looks 46 AT BEST. Even Jill commented that they are the same age and she is already a grandmother! Regardless, she’ll be in her 60′s when her kids graduate from high school. I think she’s pushing the limits of her fertility, but power to anyone who’s got the money and the spirit to do it.
Well, @Sarcas you bring up a good point. Am I cutting Ramona slack that I definately did not give Kim? Yes, absolutely. I know that we view Kim completely differently (I think she is a succubus of need and you think she is sweet) and that certainly colors how I view any possible addictions they each may have. With Ramona….yeah, bitch is crazy and has no filter but she is also almost pathologically honest in how she approaches everyone in her life, including herself. If she was an alcoholic I think she would be the first one to talk about it. Plus, Jill is a cuntmonster and I can definately see her orchestrating a smear campaign to pay back Ramona for kicking her off Scary Island. Look how Jill keeps perpetrating the myth that Kelly was somehow bullied on Scary Island and that – again – Ramona was the worst offender. We all saw that Ramona actually was extremely helpful to Kelly. But Kelly (with Luann and Jill) keeps insisting that what we saw wasn’t real and that certainly is not a healthy thing for any of them to do.
Well said ohralphie.
I think women can have kids at any age. How many men in their seventies have kids with there younger second, third or fourth wives just ti keep them happy? How hypocritical and ignorant.
@ohralphie, I don’t disagree with you that Jill has it out for Ramona. She certainly felt very ostracized when Ramona didn’t let her stay on Scary Island, and in a sense, took Bethenny and Alex’s sides over Jill’s. But my point regarding the alcoholism is that neither Jill nor Luann need to point out Ramona’s drinking to the audience, we can see it for ourselves. Ramona walks in a room and immediately asks for a drink. We’ve seen her loaded plenty of times over the years. She came to Sonja’s party already drunk. She was drunk on a Hooters boat flirting with the captain. She was drunk and singing, “Turtle Time!”, with a glass in her hand. Drunk, drunk, drunk! Does this make her an alcoholic? Who knows. But it definitely makes her a drunk. LOL
(I only bought up Kim to say that Kyle used the power of suggestion to smear her, whereas Luann is using the power of proof against Ramona. Hours and hours of footage of a tipsy Ramona acting a damn fool. Guess who’s invited to my next party?
)
Oh yeah – Ramona does love her pinot. I just find it suspect that Kelly, Jill and Luann keep making a point of saying repeatedly that Ramona is drunk *again*. Crap, if we all took a shot whenever the bitch a’trois mentions Ramonas drinking we would all be happily drunk during WWHL. Which would be a good thing, but still — noone commented on Ramonas drinking last season, with the exception of Turtle Time.
Wasn’t it last season that Kelly said Ramona’s blood type was Pinot Grigio? And someone else, I think it was Bethenny, said Ramona needed an IV drip for her Pinot?
I don’t think these women drink this much during the off season. It’s just that most of the show’s good drama occurs at parties where the alchohol is flowing, so that’s the footage they use. And the ladies probably drink more during filming because they’re nervous and uneasy around each other.
Now Sonja on the other hand…she really does seem to have some issues.
Sonja is on that cooooooooooh-caine!
I agree with Ollybeau, I think they drink more while filming and to release the tension. If Ramona were ALWAYS drunk I think it would take her a lot more to GET drunk. I have a friend who loves her wine. At any event, you have to have her red wine. You associate her with wine, etc etc but she’s hardly an alcoholic. She rarely drinks so when she does it’s very evident. She gets tipsy faster. I’ve been in many situations with her where she has no problem not drinking her wine either…I just think its a fine line when you start saying things like that about someone to a large audience. Obviously Ramona is promoting soemthing so every chance she gets she wants to be seen with Pinot or mentioning Pinot. No one thought B was a drunk when all she talked about was Skinny Girl margarita’s.
Of course I will defend Ramona because I think in her real life she is probably a pretty down to earth, successful, smart woman. I think these women put her on the defense. She’s always prepared for battle because they will twist and turn whatever she says. They are all terribly catty and love the gossip. I think Ramona says things about people but I get the sense that she would prefer to not have to talk negatively about people or gossip (unless it’s with proven trust worthy friends) if she didn’t have to. She might not like someone or find them weird but I think gossiping is different.
I don’t like Cindy. She’s boring. And I think she wants those children to be like her and her brothers kids. She wants him to be the father figure in their life. I think that’s why he runs when the actual father comes around, he’s reminded that they aren’t his children and he doesn’t like it. I’m close with my brother and I hate thinking weird things when people are REALLY close but cindy just strikes me as wishing she could find a man like him–which crosses the line for me. CREE-PY.
I think the Housewives drink more during filming because the Bravo crew shows up every day with their cameras, mics, and a few cases of booze. The Housewives are probably given as much access to alcohol as the Real World or Jersey Whore kids are.
RHONY Producer: “Can I top off that glass of wine for you, Jill? Now, let’s talk about Ramona: Would you say that Ramona is a “common drunk”, or a “raging alcholic”? Great stuff, Jill! Keep giving us this great stuff! Another glass? Hey, looks like Bethanny’s really digging a hole for herself on that show of hers! What would you tell her, if, say, she was watching this right now??”
Exactly. In vino veritas…
Isn’t LuAnn supposedly fluent in several languages? (She sure jumped on Ramona’s mis-pronunciation of that location in Italy.) Is she the only person on the planet who thinks Jacques rhymes with SHACK instead of SHOCK?
Amazing, too, how she’s suddenly (thanks, Jhack) so knowledgeable aboout wine. “Is this a vineyard wine, Dahling?”
Btw, your ladyship, no sentence ever begins with the word ME. As in Me and Jhack are going into town. Did I say she’s fluent in several languages? Apparently English isn’t one of them.
Is anyone else concerned about the way the “baby daddy” handles the little ones? I rarely gasp at anything that happens on these shows, but the way he pushed the one baby over in a somersault with her head twisted under her body, then holding the other one in a way that she could have SO EASILY toppeled over on her head…I just hope there’s never any reason to leave them alone with him. Even Cindy seemed to notice the danger. Maybe she can buy him some edumacation in how to handle infants.
Voiceofreasonnot: I didn’t notice that, but I’m sure the “baby daddy” (aka Howie’s ex boyfriend) may not be well versed in how to play with children. I reckon he doesn’t get visitation rights and can only play with his kids under Cindy’s and her nannies’ watchful gaze. My babe is a bit older and I am careful with her but she does like a bit of wrestling and horseplay. Of course, this includes tickling and somersaults but no stress on the neck or limbs. Perhaps if Cindy allowed him to see them more often or wasn’t so rough and judgemental with him, he would have a bit more confidence in how to handle the little ones. I find that many dads are well meaning, and just require a bit of instruction instead of harsh criticism and distrustfulness. I’m sure, at 50 (or 75), Cindy was new to whole child-rearing thing and needed to be taught, so the same should go for the dad. Of course, she’ll probably never give him the chance to learn because she could use it as an excuse to retain full custody. She never wanted her baby daddy to be a hands on father anyway.
Cindy won’t even admit that her “ex” was a sperm donor and she is still trying to convince us that he scthupped her regularly and at will. Girl, the jig is up!
@Voiceofreasonnot, I have to go back and look. I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary with his interactions. But, I don’t have kids, so I can’t be sure whether or not the guy was being too rough.
None of these “ladies” are likeable….I can’t stand Alex or Crazy eyes the most…I think Ramona has more than a drinking problem..the way her eyes pop out when she gets angry and do any of you remember last years’ reunion show when she jumped in front of Jill and got face to face with her screaming her head off…she seems very unbalanced..more than just a drinking problem..I can’t stand watching her..no wonder her husband is always looking at the woman around him..remember the sidewalk cafe scene ..around season 1 or 2 when he almost fell off his chair checking out some young chick walking past him? LOL
Please give me feedback on this….
Jill and Ramona are the NY version on ATLs Nene and Kim, and OCs Vicki and Tamra. What I mean is, they are frenemies who go waaaaay back, and this is their cycle. They grate of each other’s nerves for various reasons. Like, they are competitive sisters who hate each other’s guts, but are attached to each other at the end of the day. They will continue a never-ending cycle of a period of BFF, then a big blow-out, a period of mutual hatred, then one day they both wake up and are “over it”. Every single time they are “done!”, but they will NEVER be DONE. It’s almost a sick dependency, in my opinion. Lastly, what IS it with these HW Twats and “Doing lunch”??? If my friend pisses me off, I either A) Tell her right them, the moment it happens. B) Call her up and have a discussion about it. or C) Ask her to come over/me go to her place and talk through it. Why is there a lunch necessary? Like, my bestie says something rude, I tell her she’s a bitch, she says sorry, I say ok, then we make some cinammon rolls and call it a day! I just don’t get it.
Luann was upset because her boyfriend has something to do with wine–remember the speed dating with wine event? Either she was trying to show off how much she knew herself about wine, or imply that Ramona is not a true wine maker–unlike her boyfriend.