RINGER Recap

You guys A #1 – Let’s show some love for RINGER!!!

For realz, Gasmii – our show is on the FENCE!   Yes, we got a full season pickup, but will we get a 2nd season?   Let’s give RINGER the love it deserves, y’all…

Well, the CW did an amazing job of promoting the show this past week and a half – they basically re-aired the entire season and I was actually able to recognize that the plot is just as insane as I thought!  Phew.  I thought it was just me. Insane, yet addictive, right?

So – here is where we (re)start with episode 7 -

Oy – here comes Henry leaving his house.  OK – the photogs are all over Henry, um, maybe cause he offed our sweet lil’ Blossom?  Allegedly…

They yell “Where’s Gemma?”  “Ransom?” “Did you file for divorce?”  “Where are those twins we keep hearing about?”   I want him to yell back “If I knew, I wouldn’t be paying this sitter $75 an hour!”   But he does not.  Boo.

He says “Whoever did this…I want my wife back!” and then jumps into an armored cop car.  Guess he’s going back in for some questions.

How are those kids doing?`

SO – Bridg (Siofauxn – do we like that?  help me people!)  is watching TV (wait, people ON TV WATCH TV???)  and she sees Henry being arrested.  Hubs doesn’t want her watching the coverage – she’s stressing herself out AND she’s with child!  (nudge, nudge, wink, wink…).  Henry has been indicted in the public eye and he’s not even a suspect!  Poor Henry, always getting the raw end of the deal…???

You guys, this episode was directed by the doctor from ER that left and we never saw again!

Bridg asks Hubs if he knows any private investigators who can look into the “disappearance”, but Hubs says the cops have it covered after all  Gemma’s father is one of the most powerful men in New York.  Say whaaa?  I love how they’ve methodically given Gemma’s character more and more cred show by show.  Did we mention she’s rich?  Did we mention she’s one of the best architects in town?  Oh and her dad is one of the most important people in town!  Too bad she had to die to get some props…

Hubs said he spoke to Henry and he wants to know if they will be going to Blossom’s Art Pavilion opening – one of her architectural projects.  She renovated a building, worked on it for two years, and he wants to honor her by showing up.  So looks like we got a party to look forward to!

Does anyone else have a strange feeling Gemma might not be so dead?

The phone rings and as Bridg answers it, Juliet comes in from a run (good girl!) followed by Det. Saldana.  Bridg says “oh thanks, yeah, they’re here.” You guys, they really need to get a new doorman.

Mr. Doorman – uh, you suck.

Hubs immediately says “What did you do Juliet?”  What a jerk.  I’m turning on Hubs, you guys.  Saldana says Bridg has vital information regarding Gemma’s disappearance and she needs to come down to the station.  They have identified a suspect (due to Bridg’s fingerprints) and now the case is a joint investigation – NYPD and the FBI (Machado!).

Bridg goes to get her purse and Hubs tells Saldana that Bridg is preggers so this better be brief.  Bridg is pacing in the walk in closet.  She pulls her old cell phone from a boot (?) and calls someone saying “Its Bridget, I think I really messed up this time.”

Juliet asks Hubs if she can spend the weekend with her friend Monica.  There’s a lot of extraneous activity going on considering the police are currently in your apartment waiting to take you in for questioning, dontcha think?  After a bit of begging Hubs says Juliet can go.  Bridg comes back in as Saldana finishes her phone call.  Guess what?  The last phone call Gemma made was to Hubs – so they have some questions for him as well.  Too bad Juliet got rid of her drugs – It will could have been a family outing!

Police station – Look, there’s Bridg!  And Hubs!  And Henry!  And Machado!  The gang’s all here!  Machado warns Saldana not to implicate Bridget in the disappearance (even though they have her fingerprints) because if they do, Mr. Mob Boss will come after her in New York.  So he’s protecting Bridget even though she’s a suspect in Gemma’s murder?  OK…  He basically tells Saldana to let him take over.

Machado enters the interrogation room to talk with Bridg.  He does a not so good job of closing the blinds and offers her coffee, water, and aspirin.  Aspirin?  That’s hilarious to me for some reason.  She turns down the aspirin and says let’s just get this over with.

Cut to Saldana questioning Hubs.  She opens a file and shows him Bridget’s mug shot.  Does he know who this is?  Cut to Det. Towers asking Henry the same question.  Split screen as they both answer “Bridget Kelly”.

H & H – Who’s yo’ daddy?

Towers asks Henry if he’s ever met this “Bridget” person.  He says no,  “Siobhan” just told him about her.  Flashback to “one day ago” – Bridg telling Henry about Bridg.  You guys, my head is about to explode.

Now we see Bridg telling Hubs about Bridg.  Yep, my head just exploded.  Is 12 noon too early to start drinking?

While telling Hubs the “Bridget story”, Juliet comes in and he tells her that there is a twin.  Juliet gets another gold star with the line “Oh Gawd, there’s two of them?”  Juliet FTW!

So now we see Bridget explaining the whole wayward, drug addict, loser twin scenario to both Henry and Hubs – with the scenes cross cutting back and forth.  She just wanted to forget about her, that’s why she never told anyone she existed!  This is actually pretty sad, considering she’s talking about herself.  I can’t imagine this is good for her recovery, can you?

She’s tells them both (separately of course) about the murder trial and the FBI etc. etc.  So she’s basically coming clean except for the fact she’s actually talking about herself.  Baby steps!

Back at the station, Machado is starting to grill Bridg, but gets pulled out of the room by Saldana.  When he comes back he tells her both Henry and Hubs knew who Bridget Kelly was, but he thought she was keeping Bridget a secret.  He asks if she has any other secrets to share.   She pulls out her cell and tells him “my sister isn’t in New York anymore”.  She plays him the message she left when she was in the closet before they went down to the station.  In the message she says she’s going to Europe.

I got it in my digits, yo!

 

Machado isn’t fully buying it.  What is “Bridget’s relationship to Gemma Butler?”  She hems and haws before standing up and saying “We’re done here!”  She walks out of the room.  Um, can you do that?  Just take off?  I have to remember that next time I’m hauled in.

Machado stops Bridg on the way out (who does he think he is? The FBI or something?) and tells her they need to discuss Malcolm Ford.  Hubs is right there but he has no problem shuffling off to Buffalo…he’ll be in the car downstairs – on his way to Buffalo (not really…) Are you guys still awake?

So Machado knows (from the beach house slap fight night) that Bridg has called Malcolm – he knows that they’ve been in contact.  You guys, hate to be a stickler but why didn’t she use that other cell phone to call Malcolm in the first place?  The boot cell phone? Remember the one with the BLOCKED number?  Whatevs…

Machado ruins the whole police interrogation party vibe by telling Bridg that Malcolm is M.I.A. and perhaps dead.  God Machado, you’re such a buzzkill!  You should spend more time with Juliet – she’s always buzzed.

OK – Bridg leaves the precinct and immediately calls Malcolm – whose phone is out of order.  Yeah!  Duh!  He’s rockin’ the wife beater, high on horse, and tryin’ to find yo’ ass, gurl!  He don’t have time to pay his phone bill!

Bridg gets in the car with Hubs and this is when we know that Hubs is evil fo’ sho’!  Look at that face! 
Oh gosh -my heart told me Hubs was good, my brain tells me Hubs is bad.

Thoughts?

WYOMING!  And we’re not at a strip club!  Yay!  The Wyoming Tourist Federation said no more strip clubs, Ringer!   So we’re on a bucolic country road.  Its purdy.  Uh-oh, there’s a hostage in the back of the van with a sack over his head – so much for Wyoming rehabilitation.  “Wyoming – Come for the strip clubs, stay for the Kidnapping!”

So – its our favorite sad sponsor Malcolm in the back of the van – looking like the Scarecrow.

They pull off the road – kidnapper #1 has to pee and is hungry and could use some copenhagen – so they take a break.  What about the hostage?  No worries – he’s high!  He’s not going anywhere!  Oh really???

See ya!

This is awesome, you guys!  Malcolm gets his shit together and busts his ass out of that van!!  Yeah, Malcolm – I was waiting for you to kick it in!  Go ‘head!!!

NYC – Bridg is on the balcony pontificating – Hubs comes out and questions her about her “sister” – he was asked things he couldn’t answer…

Flashback alert!  9 months ago (umm, significant much?)  Malcolm is giving Bridget a mini-cake with a candle – but its not my birthday she protests!  Oh but it is, he says, its your 3 month sobriety birthday!  Say whaaa?  Ok, you guys, I have minimal experience with the 12 steps BUT I do have a little experience (STFU!) and I don’t think people get an actual cake at 3 months sober, do they?  A chip, yes, a symbolic cake, yes – a real cake…not sure about that.  Lemme know.

Umm, 3 months?  Really?  More like 3 hours

And following up on that – Bridget moves in on Malcolm for a kiss.  He says he can’t because YOU GUYS the first rule in a 12 step program is DO NOT get involved with ANYONE romantically for the first year of your sobriety – ESPECIALLY do not get involved with your SPONSOR!!!  And yet after a moment of hesitation he dives right in, forgetting all 12 steps and 12 traditions…Holy crap Bridget/Malcolm!!!!

Actually, slutty Bridg is pretty hot

Alrighty, a cold shower later – Hubs and Bridg are back on the balcony.  How many flashback/flash forwards are we going to get in this episode???  And how many Roman/Greek busts do these people have hanging around their apartment?

 

Hubs tells her he read about Bridget online – the murder, the trial, the running from the trial etc – are they safe from her?  Is Juliet safe?  Ha…um, not so much Hubs.

OK, again – we get more Bridget shaming – Hubs says she’s “an addict, a prostitute – who knows what she’s capable of” – all the while saying this to the addict/prostitute he’s referring to…ugh, I hope she has some Marrianne Williamson on tape in her car – she’s gonna need it!

You’re going to need this Bridg, trust.

Truthbomb : he cannot forgive that she was not honest with him about her sister.  Oh Hubs, if you only knew…

He decides to call Juliet – he has started to regret letting her go away for the weekend.  Ok, what?  That’s random…I’m sure that plot device will play out in a bit.

Flashback to post-sex Bridg and Malcolm – they both admit this was a mistake.  But somehow it bonded them and he promises to have her back always (not like that pervs!).   Yes, this is a little ridiculous, but from experience it does make some sense.

Wyoming – Malcolm makes it home!  He throws on a new shirt and he is on the move!  Yay!  I love Malcolm!

Back in NYC Bridg is being stupid and meeting Charlie for another cup of coffee.  She tells him her friend is missing.  Oh Gawd, Bridg – we thought you got smart – wha’ happened?

Exactly!

He has heard about her “the famous missing architect” – yeah, he’s all up in there.   She drops the name “Gemma Butler” – Bridg…c’mon!!!

He says it looks like the husband (Henry) did it, she counters that no, he did not.  They are after the wrong man.

She says since he was a cop (did we know this?), can he go to the precinct and try to get some info on the investigation?  He tells her he thought being her sponsor would be a lot easier than this, but he will try to help.

Wyoming – Malcolm gets off a bus at a stop.  He goes into the bathroom to rinse off and sees familiar looking silver tipped boots peeking underneath the stall – oh Hell naw!

Them’s some Wyoming Mob boots if I ever did see ‘em

He attacks Silver Tips  who says “you didn’t think we’d let you go that easy?  We’ll find Bridget one way or another.”  He kicks the guy’s ass and takes off.

Back in NYC, Charlie and Bridg meet outside of the police station.  He tells her he knows about “Bridget” and that she’s a suspect in Gemma’s disappearance.  He asks “Where is Gemma’s car?”  He tells her there might be clues in the car.  She doesn’t want to tell him, but she breaks and says “JFK”.  Oh girl, what makes dissolve into a puddle with this guy???  And then she tells him “thank you”.  Honey, you are about due for a gay sassy friend!

 

House party – beer pong, dancing, more red cups, Monica puking in the middle of the room with Juliet holding her hair.  Aw, sweet.  Guess Monica is not the best influence either.  What’s wrong with kids today??

So Monica is wasted, but Juliet is pretty put together!  Juliet FTW!!!!  J tells M that they should cab it back to the apartment and then the driver can take them back to Monica’s.  Monica will now be known as Monifah if she ever appears again on this show.

Monica is now…

 

MONIFAH!

 

Back at the apartment/penthouse Hubs and Bridg are dressing for Gemma/Blossom’s architectural opening.

Yeah, that looks like a healthy relationship

She tells him she didn’t ever mention “Bridget” because she was ashamed – ashamed of her family.  He counters with “its not like YOU did those things!”  Oh God, Bridg, he sure is twisting that knife, isn’t he?

Mirror alert!

Drink!

She tells him its different with twins – she always felt responsible for “Bridget” and if she had told him he would have changed his opinion of her.

Bridg, girl, your psyche is roadkill about now.  GET A GRIP!!!

She then says “sometimes it’s easier to lie.”  Perhaps, but in the long run, it doesn’t work, sweetie.

And now, I think, is a huge moment.  She says “I’m sure there’s things that you’re not 100% honest with me about” and he says “I’d be lying if I said otherwise.”  OK, that’s it.  He’s evil.

He tells her when he found out about the pregnancy he wasn’t happy, but now he is – it means everything to him.  She agrees, she can’t lose him, she’s lost too much already.

Phone rings.  Hubs answers and it is Mr. Carpenter AKA Teach Logan!  He tells Hubs Juliet has been in a car accident.

So Hubs arrives at the accident and poses the most obvious question – what the hell is Juliet’s teacher doing there???  Oh, she called him.  Hm.

Meanwhile Juliet and Monifah are hanging out on Laverne and Shirley’s front stoop.

Where’s the Big Ragoo when you need him?

Hubs gives Juliet a big hug and then proceeds to tear into her.  What was she doing in the city?  She was supposed to be in Connecticut!  Why was she drinking and driving?  Juliet responds with the awesome answer “I had two beers!  Its not like I was doing coke!”  I can’t even begin on that line – I just know that I will be using it soon and often.

But Hubs isn’t having it.  Between the actual drugs and the being thrown out of school and the lies etc etc, he is OVER it!  That’s why she called Teach Logan because all Hubs does is get pissed off!  Well, he’s supa dupa pissed off J, cause you are officially cut off.  No credit cards, no allowance – nothing.  See ya!

Juliet comes through with another amazing line to pathetic Monifah – “You owe me bitch!  Like 10 million dollars!”  Juliet FTW!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE this picture – look at Monifah in the background!

At the precinct Saldana tells Machado he is a “lucky man” – they found activity from Malcolm’s ATM card right here in NYC!  With video!  New York, New York, its a wonderful town!

Machado immediately deduces that if Malcolm is in the Big Apple, then Bridget is as well…

We cut to the Art Pavilion opening honoring the missing/deceased/victim/blackmailer Gemma (Blossom) Butler!  Yay!  Sounds like fun!

Oh don’t pay attention to the accused murderer/widower/grieving husband/adulterer – he’s always like that!

Hey guys, c’mon in – let’s party!  Oh, my wife?  Uh no, she’s dead.

You guys, this is weird.  WTF is going on here?  They are “honoring” her when she’s missing?  Assumed dead?  What?

Needless to say Henry is getting WASTED!

That won’t help Henry, I’ve tried it

Conveniently Hubs is staying with Juliet (and Monifah?) so Bridg and Henry are fending off the photogs together.  He feels guilty, he’s a douchebag (ya think?), he should have listened to her blah blah.  She tells him that they will bring her back.  You guys, Gemma is SO not dead!

He wants to go home.  She says she will get him a cab – he should be home with “the boys”.  His twins or his testicles?

She sends him off, does a Scarlett O’Hara hand to the forehead, and then sees Malcolm creeping in the crowd.  She then passes out.

The EMTs arrive and take her away.  Her head is pounding.  They arrive at the emergency room and Malcolm is there.  Hubs approaches him and says thank you for helping my “wife” – Malcolm just plays the good samaratin and takes off.

Yeah, its cool.  Do you have Juliet’s dealer’s number?

Bridg is all hooked up on the monitors.  Hubs is there.  He tells her they just want to check on the baby as they wheel in the ultrasound.  Uh-oh.

He tells her don’t fight it. “This is our baby.”  Maybe…

OK – the ultrasound image comes up – is there a baby?  I think there is and I think its Malcolm’s…

JFK – hooded guy is breaking into Gemma’s car.  Surprise, surprise – its Charlie Flushing!  He then calls Siobhan on Paris to tell her he has found the car.  He is wiping up some of his own blood he dropped when he beat Gemma down…

Yeah, he’s a bad guy

 

Flashback to him approaching and then attacking Gemma.  He follows her into her place and continues to attack her.  Its pretty disturbing.

Yeesh! Sorry Blossom!

 

He tells Siobhan he has gotten rid of the blood, they won’t be able to trace it now.  Call him with her next move.

Parisian Siobhan avec braid

 

OK – you guys – did that whole episode/recap make you wig out?  SOO much info, plot complications, twin transference – wow!

 

So what now?  I think Hubs is def. evil.  Obviously Charlie is evil.  Siobhan is on her way back to town, I bet…  What do YOU think????

And Henry?  God knows…

 

Thanks for reading!