Shahs of Sunset: Double Feature

Shahs of Sunset

By TheMiki | Friday, April 13, 2012 | 6:40 pm | 32 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Recaps, Shahs of Sunset

Hey hey, Gasmii.  So sorry to have fallen behind on Shahs.  I got the sort of sick where you only leave bed when your bladder demands it, and you spend the rest of your day in a semi-vegetative state wondering how your body could possibly produce so much fucking mucus.

 

Even if my head were a hollow vessel filled to the brim with snot, I STILL would have run out of mucus an hour ago.

 So, in the interest of getting caught up before the next episode airs, we’re gonna do sort of a quickie recap of the last two episodes.  I know what you’re thinking… “How ever will TheMiki be able to fit all the excitement and drama of two Shah filled hours into one quickie recap???”  Well, I have some good news for you.  Nothing interesting happened.  At all.  I think we’ll be fine.

Let’s make this happen, shall we?

 

Interior: GG’s apartment.  GG is cutting things (food, not bitches) and talking to Reza about her parents’ upcoming 40th Anniversary Party.  Reza’s like, “Oh, I’m so sad I can’t go, but I have a blind date that night…”  But then in confessional he’s all like,

Yeeeessssss!  I hate blind dates, but not as much as I hate my friend GG.

And then GG’s like, “Well, I’m sad but I totally understand.  Oh, and unrelated, would you like to see my collection of deadly hunting knives?”

 

I call this one the Parents’ Anniversary Misser

Meanwhile… Sammy is checking up with Russel the Foreman to see how Mohamed’s new home build is coming along.

My eyes are up here, buddy

Sammy is terrified of Mohamed and wants everything perfect, because apparently Mohamed is an insane perfectionist who will not tolerate flaws of any kind.

Can you imagine having to live in a billion dollar home with visible grout????? The horror!!!!!!!

Meanwhile… GG is having lunch with her daddy, whom she claims has always made sure she has everything she needs.

Cars, clothes, money, self-esteem…  Oh no wait… I meant purses.  Not self-esteem.  Pretty girls don’t need self-esteem when they can just tear down chubby girls.

Daddy gets out a credit card statement and tells GG she has to cut back on her spending or he’ll continue making vague threats about maybe possibly making her get a job or something maybe.

Who spends $8,000 a month on clothes?  It’s like I raised you to not appreciate the things you have or respect consequences or something…

Over in the Chihuahua Den of Loneliness, MJ is waiting for Reza and talking about her upcoming birthday.  He shows up and they take the surrogate children for a walk.  Reza tells MJ, “OMG, you’re fat. Seriously.  So fucking fat. BeeTeeDubs, I got you a colon cleansing for your birthday. Oh, and you’re coming to New York to visit my estranged father with me.  Do you think they’ll make you buy two seats? Cause you’re so fat?”

Oh, and you’re fat.

Over in the land of excessive excess, GG and her sister (who has a fucking job, by the way) are at a car lot picking out a car to buy their parents for their anniversary.

Money is no object. Only the best for my daddy.  Just put it on my daddy’s credit card.

New rule:  If you are COMPLETELY reliant on your parents for money, as in have no outside income and every dime you bring in comes out of their bank account, you are not allowed to buy them presents.  You learn to sculpt or paint or weld or glue some macaroni to a fucking card so that you can make them something nice.  Just like a six-year-old would do, since that’s essentially what you are, you lazy twat.

Meanwhile… Mohamed gets home and runs around screaming at the construction crew for such offenses as having a coffee cup on the roof with them.  Outside.  On the roof.  The waterproof, protect the whole house from the elements covered in shingles roof.  And without even using a coaster.

And get your shoes off my sidewalk, you barbarians!

After all that yelling he tells Sammy and Russ good job and that he’s very happy with the work they’ve done.

Meanwhile…

You can tell I’m super spiritual cause I wear panchos while sitting cross-legged on my quirky outdoor furniture.

Asa is taking two of her songs over to her producer friend so he can give her some feedback and maybe produce her record.

I better at least get a handjob for this

They listen to the songs and Donray is all like, “Bitch, you craycray. I ain’t attaching my name to this rubbish.  I’ve got a reputation to protect.”  Only he says it like, “You’d have to change your sound to make it more mainstream and I think you have too much self-respect and an artist and an individual.”

No, no…My ears always bleed when I hear something original and artistic

Oh hey, MJ’s mom is here!  Well, not here.  That would be terrifying.  MJ’s mom is here:

In MJ’s house, doing sassy hand.

Mama MJ runs around saying helpful, uplifting things like, “You’re doing that wrong” and “Here, let me fix that” and “You’re a chubby disappointment.”

You were also a mistake

Reza tells Mrs. Nagsworthy that he’s nervous about visiting his dad cause he hates seeing his dad flirt with other women and be a playboy because his dad cheated on his mom and then they got divorced.  Nagsworthy says to let the man flirt and man the hell up and stop slouching and get a real job and find a nice girl and settle down.

Meanwhile…

I need a present for my friend’s birthday. I want to spend about three thousand dollars, because Bravo! would like me to build up some suspense that said friend and I might hook up someday.

Have you considered buying her an Asian chick?  Bitches love Asian chicks. Look, this one’s got funny ears.  I’ll give you a deal. I have more in the back.

You know what bitches love even more than Asian chicks?

Asian chicks who shove tubes up their butts

Awww yeah, nothing says Happy Birthday like sterile anal penetration in a loft pretending to be a medical facility.  I’m pretty sure it’s an awful procedure because:

a) Getting your colon irrigated sounds suspiciously like gay waterboarding

b) No one showing that much cleavage should be allowed to perform medical procedures

And c)…

A gay man is crying because the thing you put in his butt is too big.  A really gay man.  Who I suspect is a total nelly bottom.

After the colon irrigations are complete MJ tells us she hated it and didn’t lose any weight.  All she lost was four hours of her life.

Reza is out meeting up with his blind date, who a drunk chick at Sammy’s party randomly told him he needed to meet.  I know I like to let random party whores make the majority of my matchmaking decisions for me.  They’re just so intuitive.

I’m dressed, pressed, and I’ve got a freshly scrubbed sphincter… Bring on the mancandy!

Hi, I’m your date.  I’m 14, I dressed almost exactly like our waiter, and the only reason you won’t feel like a pedophile while you’re out with me is because my creepy facial hair makes me look more like a child-rapist than you do.

You’re paying for dinner right?  Cause I don’t get my allowance for two more days.

Let’s see what Reza is missing out on by ditching GG to go meet up with the Twink Wonderboy…

I want tonight to be all about my parents, so I’ve chosen an understated, refined outfit to blend in with the other guests.

My auntie has a mental disorder and a collection of knives. I’m not allowed to play at her house.

Happy Anniversary!  We bought you a car you don’t need and GG went in half with your credit card.

Do you remember your Uncle Mike?

Get away from me! You smell like the Jersey Shore!

OMG, you guys! Our friend that is always chronically late for absolutely everything she does is LATE.  I can’t fucking believe this shit.

So… Totally off topic, just wondering… Where is your knife collection right this minute? 

Hi, I’m finally here. Ready for GG to rain down fire and insults and sassy head movements on me.

That’s a total dick move, but I’m not actually gonna lose my shit and get all up in your face cause I know you’re not prettier than me or anything.

And that’s the end of that episode.  Let’s jump straight into the next.

GG and Asa are shopping together.  Asa has chosen the store, because Asa has wicked awesome fashion sense

The Zoltar look is so six months ago

She pulls out some outfits that are hideous even by my lesbian white trash standards, and as much as I hate everything about her and her stupid face, GG’s stupid face is pretty much exactly how I feel about those clothing choices

Over at Reza’s house, his adorable mom is coming over to bring him some old family photos so that he can look at them and rip open a bunch of old wounds for his mom by exclaiming over how pretty she used to be and how happy they looked.

Remember how much you cried when dad left?? Haha.  That was so funny.  Wasn’t that funny?  When you cried?  Hey, why are you crying again?

You know what sounds like a totally awesome idea?  One that couldn’t possibly have any negative consequences or lead to any fighting or drama?

Girls Night!!!!!

Three out of six girls attending Girls Night are prettier than GG.  Let’s watch what happens…

So MJ, I’m still really upset with you about my parents’ anniversary dinner and your late arrival.  I’m addressing this in a calm and grown up manner because you’re so fat.  Clearly you’re no threat to my role as Pretty Girl.  Let’s make amends and move on with our lives.

We’ll all just split a salad please.  No, it’s never occurred to me that my behavior could be a direct result of my body consuming itself from hunger all the time.  Why do you ask?

Also MJ, me and my somehow even prettier sister would like to address the issue of you getting off the hook for talking a bunch of shit in Vegas. Also, we’re both prettier than GG.

I know I talk endless shit and am always late, but I have an incredibly demanding career which comes first.  Also, you all look skinnier standing next to me.

I am Asa’s random friend. I pissed off a Bravo! editor and so now they’re gonna cut to me jumping in and defending MJ while yelling at GG for reason about how if she didn’t live off her parents she might understand what it’s like to have to work.

Bitch please! You don’t know me! Lets shout over each other so no one can understand either one of us.

You’re a mean girl and I’m leaving

I hope you get hit by a bus, you soulless ginger bitch!

You were mean to my friend, so I’m leaving too.  Plus I have to get this dress back to Jersey in 1984 before someone notices it’s missing

The next day GG goes to see her sister.  After bitching to the cameras about how her sister is judgmental and never takes her side, GG is surprised when said sister doesn’t immediately jump into the ring for her when she starts bitching about the argument at Girls Night.

Well… Have you tried not being a raging cuntrag?

Over at Sammy’s place, MJ has shown up to do some birthday shots and open her birthday present.

I wanted to give you a gift that said, “I need someone to fall back on in case I ever get lonely enough to start setting up Facebook pages for my dogs.”

After getting her new diamond earring, MJ hooks up with Reza and they head to New York to see his estranged father for the first time in 16 years.

You look fat, by the way.  Fatty.

You would probably assume that Reza’s father has been so distant because of his son’s sexuality, but it turns out that the tension and abandonment in the Reza family are all because his mom’s side is Muslim and his dad’s side is Jewish.  Gramma Jew is a nasty old woman who hates Muslims, and she’s not a fan of her grandson, who is clearly a terrorist.

Reza’s Gramma:  Making people feel slightly less bad about the holocaust since the fucking holocaust.

Reza and his dad have an awkward sort of barely hug upon seeing each other for the first time in 16 years, but Reza takes him outside to talk where it’s quieter.  And where the hateful glare of Nana is at least buffered by some plate glass.

I’m sorry about your grandmother.  It’s just that she hates you.

Reza cries to his dad about how he never called or wrote or checked to see if he was even alive.  Reza’s dad tells Reza that it was difficult because Nana hates all NonJews and didn’t want no dirty stinkin’ terrorist in the family.  Reza says he’s done with her then, and goes back inside.  Reza’s dad stands on the porch and cries.

Goddammit!  TheMiki is an insensitive prick who could give two fucks about the suffering of others with only a few exceptions.  I cannot handle seeing animals get abused, seeing kids cry those epic little kid something awful happened tears, and seeing little old men cry at all.  Three things that make me a major softy, and Reza’s dad is so killing me right now.

Poor little old man with a heinous bitch of a mother...

MJ hears the commotion and takes Reza back outside to talk to his dad some more and she orders them to give each other a real hug.  They do, and the drama calms down, and everything goes smoothly for the remainder of the evening.

Evil Nana remains evil…

Well, that’s it for this week, kids.  Sorry for the delay, but I hope everyone is all caught up for the new episode this weekend, which will be posted on time, I promise.  Oh, and I turned 30 today (on Friday the 13th even), so wish me a happy fucking birthday.

Chase is enjoying the random April snow we’re experiencing

Stella needed a hug

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TheMiki
About

I enjoy mocking other people because it's the only thing I'm really good at, and I think we should all use the gifts God gave us.  My childhood was way more fucked up than yours, and yet I'm a fully productive member of society with no criminal record or bastard children.  As such, listening to coked-out hookers whine about their baby-daddies getting arrested and how they live this life cause their mama didn't breastfeed them makes me want to throw furniture at my TV.  When I'm not tearing down people on television I like to paint, write, drink coffee, hike, and make pathetic attempts to play the guitar, because chicks dig a lady with an instrument.

32 Comments

  1. 1
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted April 13, 2012 at 8:20 pm

    Happy Birthday, themiki! :-)

    Frankly, I find anyone bitching about someone having a love life when they don’t, a bit of a jealous hag. I’m sure when Reza was in his long-term relationship, he wasn’t worried about his father, either. And, also Reza is almost 40. If you want a relationship with your father, pick up the goddamn phone. He can spend a shit load of money in Vegas for a birthday party, but he can’t make a long-distance phone call? I really don’t have any respect or patience for people who think that others are mind readers and should know what they want.

  2. 2
    Delia
    Posted April 13, 2012 at 9:33 pm

    I actually like this show now. I usually like a show when I hate someone on it. And that someone is GG. You’re so right, she is a raging cuntrag.

    Did anyone catch Sammy seriously overvalueing the earrings to MJ? He stated that they were ‘like $15-20 thousand’, but at the store, he was charged around $2800.

    Even rich Persians lie about the price tag. lol.

  3. 3
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted April 13, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    I wonder if I can respectfully ask for recappers across the board to dispense with the de rigueur apology for being late and explanation of the reason? I just read three recaps from different ‘cappers, and all three started with apologies.

    We all have lives. We’re all busy. We all get sick. (I’m not sure I ever got even ONE of the Quantum Kitchen recaps in on time.) So we get it. Snark is what the smart, funny recappers here do best. So, do what you do best, and don’t apologize to us.

    And happy birthday. And give Stella more hugs!

  4. 4
    J-Mo J-Mo
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 2:11 am

    Happy Birthday TheMiki! I love your work on this show, and I especially love the word “cuntrag” and I especially love the thought of GG reading these and getting super mad.

    love, J-Mo :)

  5. 5
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 5:21 am

    Oh TheMiki, I’m so glad you’re baaaaack! I had to watch TWO whole epis all by myself without you or the other Gasmi, and I was afraid you had given up on the Shahs.

    Whew!

    Happy birthday and glad you’re feeling better. Try not to watch anything sad while you are a human snot farm ’cause crying loosens up all the mucus and… why am I telling YOU that? You know.

    Great recap.

  6. 6
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 8:12 am

    @Delia, I thought there was a scene where Sammy said he and the jewelry store owner knew each other and the store owner gave him a discount.

  7. 7
    MrsMiaWallace
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 8:30 am

    Seconded. I actually was considering sending this request straight to Flipit. I just started skipping over the first paragraph cause I don’t care that it’s late or why and reading excuses as a start to every recap is such a downer.

  8. 8
    DagnyTaggart
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 9:16 am

    Holocaust jokes? Really?
    Dickhead.

  9. 9
    TV Junkie
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 10:12 am

    I can not stand Renza’s bitch Grandmother…I think Renza should have brought GG with him for the visit. She would have beaten the crap out of the old bitch. MJ is too nice, she was sitting next to Reza’s father chatting up a storm ..I really love MJ and Reza the best ..so glad they have each other.
    I also loved GG’s parents ..how adorable are they. Is there any chance GG is from Renzia’s grandmother’s seed??? She really could not have come from such sweet people.
    Oh well I can’t wait until the the last one..hopefully BRAVO will bring this crew back quickly..the show has grown on me!

  10. 10
    lola
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 5:04 pm

    Why are these people so fugly? Ive seen some very good looking persian girls and these people look nothing like them. they look more like gipsys like asa portrays them very well

  11. 11
    lola
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 5:05 pm

    Felt bad about Reza. He’s the only one I like from the show.. the rest is gahbage gahhbage I tell ya

  12. 12
    MrsMiaWallace
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 9:55 pm

    The holy concept of Snark eludes you

  13. 13
    themiki
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 11:17 pm

    Holocaust jokes are outside Mein Kaumfort zone…

  14. 14
    themiki
    Posted April 14, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    I am definitely okay with that. From now on when I’m late I will either refuse to acknowledge it, or I’ll just say something like, “This recap is late because Fuck You, that’s why.”

  15. 15
    MrsMiaWallace
    Posted April 15, 2012 at 12:58 am

    lol!!!

  16. 16
    MrsMiaWallace
    Posted April 15, 2012 at 1:00 am

    Yes! Best reason for anything!

  17. 17
    mirabelle gingerbread
    Posted April 15, 2012 at 1:35 am

    hey, I turned 32 on friday the 13th!

    I can’t help loving this show. it’s so trashy & great. your recaps have been hilarious! :)

  18. 18
    clares
    Posted April 15, 2012 at 8:41 am

    Loved the “with out a coaster” comment! Did any one see that Sylvester Stallone is suing Mohammed for a crappy remodel job on his home? All I could think of was “I hope Sammy wasn’t in charge of that project, but he probably was…”

  19. 19
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted April 15, 2012 at 4:14 pm

    Sure–I wouldn’t take offense. Properly deployed “fuck yous” can be high art, too.

  20. 20
    labowner
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 11:19 am

    Sister seems pretty normal.

  21. 21
    labowner
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 11:21 am

    Own a mirror?

  22. 22
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 11:26 am

    Dirty Thirty! Congratulations!

    Doesn’t Sammy know MJ is going to see this and realized that he high balled the price? Some times I wonder if people really do forget that there’s a god damn boom mic over their heads.

  23. 23
    labowner
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 11:27 am

    Happy belated b-day Miki. Did the dogs help or hinder your recovery? Mine gets annoyed with me when I don’t meet his daily demands.

    Thanks for the doubled up recaps. Love this show. Glad to see it didn’t fall by the wayside.

    Boo to mucus and yeah I read this well before lunch.

  24. 24
    2muchbravo
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 12:03 pm

    Happy fucking birthday TheMiki!
    And, don’t look at it as being late. You’re just taking a page out of MJ’s book!
    MJ is a chunky girl but it would probably help if she got a breast reduction and dressed in a more flattering way. Those shorty-shorts don’t fly for a girl with big thighs! And, I’m speaking as a girl with big thighs. It’s not like she can’t afford to go to a stylist!
    Seeing Reza’s poor father crying was sad. It seemed like he was looking for somewhere to hide. Reza was on WWHL last night. He said things are much better between them now.
    All snark aside, he had a very valid point when he said everyone in the Middle East should put aside the bullshit and just love each other. It’ll never happen. People have been fighting over religion for thousands of years.
    Can’t wait for your ‘cap of the finale.

  25. 25
    Poopsicle
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 5:22 pm

    I did Nazi that coming! Anne Frankly I’m offended too!

  26. 26
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted April 16, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    U.N. Secretary Reza Farahan: stoppin’ wars and spreadin’ the love.

    His rape ‘stache is a peace-keeping force all its own. Park that thing between two combatant countries and neither side will go near it. (Or, you could do the same thing with Asa’s pussy. Blam! Instant no-go zone.)

  27. 27
    Angeloudi
    Posted April 17, 2012 at 5:26 am

    I love these recaps! They are hilarious! I was going to stop watching this boring show, but gave it another chance because of these summaries. Loved the getting the dress back to 1984 Jersey crack.

  28. 28
    maxiefoofoo
    Posted April 18, 2012 at 11:14 am

    This recap was so funny! MJ is always late because she is getting her drunk and drugs on. Look at the way she walks in when she is late, she can’t look straight and her words are slurred. The amount of alcohol this woman drank in Vegas had to have been accompanied by some happy drugs. Even Sammy tells her on the last episode that she is a sloppy drinker.

    Sammy is afraid to come out of the closet. He is so critical of women and tells them to their face. On the blind date he tells MJ’s friend, you need to tone your body when the guy is a tub of lard and fugly! He is not dipping in the man pond he is way in there! He needs to open the door and come out like Reza did!

  29. 29
    fancyface
    Posted April 24, 2012 at 10:49 am

    Where’s the finale recap, WHERE’S THE finale recap, WHERE’S THE FINALE RECAP??? lol…I NEED TO VENT!! Ok, sorry, but I can’t wait any longer so I’m venting on this one about the finale.

    WHAT A LITTLE, HEINOUS PIECE OF SHIT THAT SAMMY TURNED OUT TO BE! Why were the producers hiding his true colors and only focusing on GG’s hideous personality? I saw glimpses of sliminess from him, but his epi brought it out in rare form.

    1st of all, does that little troll own a mirror? What makes him think he has the right to criticize ANYONE’S weight, let alone a beautiful girl that he was lucky enough to be set up with? My jaw dropped when he said she’s ok but her body would be banging if only she would tone it up. The AUDACITY! Seriously? Seriously? Fucking, Seriously??? Have you SEEN yourself tubbo?

    2ndly, to ignore the awful behavior of MJ’s ex towards her just sealed his fate on top of my shit list. What a shitty friend. For him to try to justify it by saying she was enjoying it is INSANE. Is he delusional? Her desperate uncomfortableness came screaming through the tv, so I can only imagine how clear it was to anyone in the same room with them! Someone that was enjoying that attention doesn’t flee a room and practically hurl themselves into oncoming traffic to get away. I felt so bad for her, and I couldn’t believe the way he treated her when they met up afterwards to try to defer blame for his stupid idea of bringing that asshole back around one of his supposedly best friends by insulting her further and telling her no one else would come because she is so horrific. He is such. a. piece. of. SHIT! And MJ’s obvious incapability of expressing her feelings to him fully made me feel just even worse for her. That poor girl has obviously been beat down by that horrible mother of hers so much over the years that she has a hard time communicating her feelings as evident throughout almost every conversation with her friends, especially when they are criticizing her. I.E. her lack of ability to hold her corner when GG & Anita confronted her making her turn to others with relief when they stepped in for her, the way she gets so flustered when she’s trying to defend herself to he mom, her stunned silence when Rezza told her her mom didn’t love her, which, BTW REZZA, although her mom may not necessarily like her, I’m sure she loves her and you telling her that she doesn’t was completely out of line, but it did come out kind of hilarious because of his delivery. Yeah, she’s not the greatest communicator and her friends should be aware of that by now and actually give a shit, but I don’t think many of them do.

    And, oh yeah, SAMMY IS A PIECE OF SHIT! Phew, I feel a little better. Love this recap, btw, Miki :)

  30. 30
    TheMiki themiki
    Posted April 24, 2012 at 12:03 pm

    It’s almost done! Sorry you had to keep all that anger buried inside while I took entirely too long writing the finale recap. I should have it done tonight, which means it will most likely be posted tomorrow. And then you can yell some more, if you’d like.

  31. 31
    fancyface
    Posted April 24, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    Lol…thanks 4 the reply Miki. Sorry 4 the yelling but I’d just gotten around to watching it & Sammy made me violent! So instead of punching babies, I thought ranting on the Gasm about that idiot would help me out. BTW, it totes did :-)

  32. 32
    kthxbai
    Posted May 1, 2012 at 4:58 pm

    @TheMiki I’m so sorry about your rib and hope it’s better and you still have some pain pills. Because to watch this skankfest you need lots.

    I think this show might be my fault. Because 1 time I said I didn’t see how Bravo could get any trashier than Real Housewives.

    My guess is the universe must’ve heard it and decided to show me who’s boss.

    Just like with the Real Housewives, we probably don’t want to go rooting around too much in exactly how the Shah posse’s parent’s natural wealth building abilities got them to the point where the poor girl’s dumping diamonds in her water bottle.

    Reza’s dad didn’t make me cry a bit. Evil Naneh’s ways aren’t his fault. But he’s been a grown ass man for a minute. If he didn’t call his son for 16 yrs, that’s on him.

    For me what was sad was Reza just sitting there and listening to that shit. And MJ that’s supposed to be his BFF didn’t say my name and drag him out of that Tribute to Reproduction Furniture exhibit they were having in their living room.

    Which was so stereoffensive and cheesy it was actually kind of awesome.

    Oh and just in case there’s any ignorant lurkers that need to hear it, there’s a whole mess of people from Iran (and every other place, even Beverly Hills) that are respectable and nice. That even have regular jobs and know how to act.

    And don’t keep their nasty shoes on when they go in the fucking house!

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