Shahs of Sunset Recap: MJ’s Vag Has a Case of the Sads

Shahs of Sunset

By plockness monster | Wednesday, January 2, 2013 | 2:06 pm | 15 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Recaps, Shahs of Sunset

Happy birthday, MJ! She is getting ready and waiting on her friends to arrive at her apartment. She is nervous about meeting all of her potential men, but more nervous to see Reza. Creepy Sammy arrives first, followed by cousin Tehran and two possible booty calls. One of the dudes is called “Drizzy.” Yes, it is because he looks like Drake’s doppelganger. Asa is next. She tells us she is ready to party with MJ and hopefully start anew regarding their friendship. Mike also arrives with a guy for MJ. Omid is next. Reza brings up the rear. Fitting. There are three potential dates, and they are weirdly lined up in the living room.

MJ’s buffet.

The friends question the guys, and ask the important questions, like “Which Persian stew would you be?” Here comes the birthday girl! She greets everyone and gives Drizzy sex eyes. Reza and MJ finally come face to face, and although it is kind of weird, they seem to forgive each other for the moment. Their transportation arrives. It looks like a limo truck?? I think Mike says it best when he calls it a “strip club on wheels.”

Only the classiest of the classy for these Shahs.

MJ mentions they are headed to Malibu. They decide to get the party started early in the limo truck. Reza points out that there is a dance floor. They open bottles of champagne and begin to do the chicken dance. I kid! MJ shows us where she keeps her lip gloss.

Hard to believe this one can’t find a man.

Mike instigates some innocent kissing between MJ and the potential suitors. For the 100th time, she tells us that she is nervous. Drizzy also proves he is gentlemanly by telling MJ he will only kiss her if she says it’s okay. Reza approaches Mike and MJ. They kiss and make up. Reza assures her that he will always be there for her. Mike tells them that he would like to invite all of them to Mexico for a little vacation. Sun, fun, and no drama. Yeah, right!

Coconut gets her hair done by someone that I will never be able to afford.

The party truck arrives in Malibu. They get drinks, and MJ talks to the other guests that did not ride with them. We have a potential fourth guy! Drizzy and MJ start to give each other sex eyes again. Reza and Asa notice. Reza tells us Drizzy looks young, but that ain’t no thang for MJ, Queen of the Cougars. They call Drizzy over to chat about MJ. Reza tells him that MJ seems to like him. It looks like it could be a love connection, so Reza calls MJ over to them. MJ seems smitten as she tells Drizzy she was just talking about him. She is shocked that Reza is actually endorsing Drizzy. I really wish they would just call him by his real name.

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I am here for your amusement. 

15 Comments

  1. 1
    Jennifer
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 2:55 pm

    WOW. GG is in need of some very swift rehab. I don’t think they have shown her sober this whole season. She needs some therapy before she really hurts someone or herself. LOVE REZA’S MOM, she is adorable!

  2. 2
    labowner
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 3:15 pm

    Reza is such an ass he didn’t even post a blog last week to talk about what a dick he is.

  3. 3
    labowner
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 3:19 pm

    The obsession with “skinny” on this show is really becoming aggro and I am a skinny chick.

  4. 4
    aliens.rock
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 3:45 pm

    Yeah, some of them are skinny, but MJ isn’t. I think she looked great during her party. I was suprised she was coherent and walked to the limo all by herself. She looked great,and she is no size 4. Obsession with body image has IMO more to do with living in Los Angeles, and one of the most talkative people on the show being gay (Reza). I think that gay men love skinny and beautiful women, because they are almost unreal, just like fantasy dolls,and they can idealize them. They also look great in high fashion clothes. Most fashion designers (male) design for a size 0-2 women. They do not want to deal with our rolls of fat, stretch marks and PMS. (And who could blame them?…:-))

  5. 5
    Holyterror
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:05 pm

    Did Mike get a spanking? His hiney looks awful red.

  6. 6
    plockness monster plockness monster
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:11 pm

    There is no doubt GG has a drinking problem, but I wonder if she has been edited to look like a COMPLETE lush??

  7. 7
    labowner
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:22 pm

    Plock I believe we have a winner. You noted the back-and-forth between the GG/Mike scene.

    Oh and by the way – what happened to the love of Mike’s life? She was in one episode and is done? Is she with him, but does not appear on screen?

  8. 8
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 4:56 pm

    This show’s been on a record of making me mad every week for a whole month. But episode broke a record. And I hit a new low. Being shamed by a Shah of Sunset.

    MJ proved she’s got a purer heart than I’ll ever have by forgiving Reza. I’ll never forgive him for telling about them doing it in the shower. Even if he hadn’t said it on tv I still wouldn’t.

    We didn’t know MJ went to the spa with her the day after GG had her hateTweet fit. It’s easy to say well they both know GG’s batshit crazy. And also has that fairy tale sickness where she opens her mouth and snakes and toads fly out. Still I can see how that would be hurtful. To a regular person that had a scrap of real feelings, though. I don’t know why it bothered Reza.

    But MJ was wrong to do it anyway. She should’ve just kept her mouth shut and ignored GG. Which is also what she and Asa both should’ve done at the pool party.

    When Asa said that about haven’t you heard me talking about how I’m in the Persian nose business all the time, I think MJ was telling the truth when she said no.

    But if all that hadn’t gone down, I bet I would’ve lived my whole life without getting to type that sentence. So my feelings about that incident are compliquated.

    My anti-Mike sentiments got escalated with him telling those boys to kiss MJ. Like she was a piece of property. Which to him she is. He didn’t even know to feel shamed when that guy told him no because it’d go against the ways of his common decency life style.

    When he up and put his slightly below average butt on display on display I couldn’t help wishing somebody would kancho him.

    If I wasn’t committed to non violence I would’ve wished it was a girl or a Drag Queen. Because acrylics.

  9. 9
    plockness monster plockness monster
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 5:04 pm

    Lab – good point about the back and forth.

    Kthxbai – I don’t think MJ knows Reza told Asa/PC about them having sex.

  10. 10
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted January 2, 2013 at 8:53 pm

    @plockness monster I didn’t even think about that. But I sure hope you’re wrong. Because that would mean that not a 1 of them has her back even that much. You’d think something like that somebody on the camera crew would slip her an anonymous clip. Before they let her get on a bus with him and hug his neck.

  11. 11
    Jason
    Posted January 3, 2013 at 8:47 am

    More of Mike’s beefy muscular ass, and less of Reza’s flabby potbelly please?

  12. 12
    juddfan juddfan
    Posted January 3, 2013 at 4:40 pm

    oh Jason, Reza has to be good for something!!! ; )

    Haven’t seen, but this sounds less awful than the last one, which guy was Drizzy?

  13. 13
    MsMmm MsMmm
    Posted January 3, 2013 at 7:19 pm

    I was pretty sure Reza mentioned the MJ hook-up last season. Am I making it up?

  14. 14
    plockness monster plockness monster
    Posted January 4, 2013 at 7:29 am

    Judd – In this recap, if you look at the pic of the three dudes (page 3), Drizzy is the one in the red pants.

    MsMmm – I don’t recall if their hookup was mentioned last year. I feel like I would remember b/c I was shocked when he told Asa and PC the story at dinner.

  15. 15
    badgerfreak
    Posted January 9, 2013 at 6:25 am

    I can’t bring myself to actually watch this show, so your recaps satisfy my curiosity. Thank you. From what it sounds like, GG needs some serious rehab. Quickly. It’s all just…so much wow.

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