Shahs of Sunset Recap: The Circle of Hate

Shahs of Sunset

By plockness monster | Tuesday, December 18, 2012 | 12:24 pm | 11 Comments
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Posted in: Recaps, Shahs of Sunset

Asa and Reza decide they are done with GG. It is time to pick sides and they choose any side that does not involve her. She is done ruining their fun! Don’t worry guys, MJ will take care of that at dinner tonight.

Since MJ is now face-to-face with GG, she excuses her behavior because Asa should not have said the big nose comment upon first meeting Omid. Does anyone else think that MJ is scared of GG? The only person that should truly be scared is GG’s dad because he is going to have to live with her until he dies. GG repeats her “I am who I am” mantra, and says Asa can “suck her dick.” That one really has a way with words. Also, I can’t believe Bravo did not bleep out “dick.”

Time to check in with Lilly. She is getting ready for a Swimgerie photo shoot, and she is so excited that her Persian model actually has curves. If this chick is curvy, then I am the fat girl in a little coat. The photographer wants to test with Lilly, and she tells him that she is not a model but says it in a way that makes me think that she tells herself she is every day, while looking in the mirror and simultaneously stabbing a Vogue magazine. Reza and Asa stop by the shoot so Lilly can prove to them that she actually has a job. They hilariously peruse the bathing suits and Reza questions the motives of the women that would actually wear them. Lilly invites her new best friends and MJ to dinner that night. MJ must have just talked to her mother because she is acting very insecure about who really extended the invitation.  After Reza confirms that Lilly would like her to join them, MJ…hangs up? I am not really sure what happens, but I am sure she did not say yes OR no.

Asa tells us that it is time to get her shit together because she has bills, bills, bills, and no cash to pay them. She has a meeting with Shawn at Unix Water. Remember the diamond water she drinks? It’s infused with diamonds, herbs, and good vibes? Well, she is trying to convince this company to bottle and sell it for her. Shawn tells her it will take at least $100,000 to start-up production. He is being a good sport for the cameras because he does not laugh in her face one time. Someone just earned some good karma.

“I have no idea what just happened.”

GG gets a call from her father, Mahmoud, and asks her to stop by her sister’s house. It seems that Lelia wants to sit down and talk about the hair extension company. Mahmoud is there to moderate. GG is still riding the blame train, as she tells her father that Lelia has done nothing to help her with the company. This is ridiculous. It is the same defense she had with Mike, Omid, and MJ, just a different subject. GG continues to blame her sister for the lack of progress involving the company. She calls Lelia a bitch and Lelia asks her if she plans on stabbing or tazing her with her collection of weapons. GG says she wants to stab her sister in the face, then she storms out of the house. Mahmoud, the enabler, admits to Lelia that he pays most of GG’s bills. With that last fuck you, he saunters outside to get into the car with GG.

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I am here for your amusement. 

11 Comments

  1. 1
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

    @plockness monster. As soon as GG made her little leprechaun rage face I knew you’d make it the 1st pic in your recap!

    “douche brigade” is a good thing to call them. By the time this episode was over I was wishing every one of their mamas would’ve made a different choice.

    GG’s batshit crazy. Plus has got some alcohol issues. Which they all know. So Asa didn’t need to keep poking at her like she did last week. Knowing it’d just set her off. Just to get that out of the way.

    I don’t give a fuck how compliquated Reza and MJ’s relationship is. There’s no bigger scumbag in the world than somebody that tells about private stuff like that. About somebody else . In a public place and on tv. I don’t care if it’s a boy, girl, transgender or TBD.

    Last week I’d about decided Reza’s character just got re framed. But now I just think he’s a fuckwaffle.

    And then tries to blame it all on being hurt because MJ didn’t make some statement or something about GG’s Tweets. In the 1st place GG’s batshit crazy. So what does he expect? In the 2nd place he should’ve told MJ his feelings were hurt back when it happened. Maybe when he sees this episode. How GG acts with her own family he’ll get it. But if I was MJ I’d be so done with him after the restaurant stuff.

    You’re right there’s no excuse for MJ acting so ugly to Lily. I don’t think Lily’s all that likeable either. But MJ should’ve just said she had plans and couldn’t go.

    So I was already mad at both of them by the time they got to the real estate office scenes. And I’ve about had it with the way Mike talks to girls. I let it slide last week when he was calling himself calming GG down. Thinking well maybe he was just real upset. Because you don’t slam the table to calm down a drunk violent crazy person. And boys don’t raise their voices like that to girls. Not if they’ve had a scrap of home training.

    But then he puts on this tone fussing at MJ like he’s her dad or something. Like she was in there hollering by herself. But I guess in his mind it’s OK if Reza wants to yell. Just not MJ. Seriously? Way to keep those stereotypes going for another generation.

    I still suspect him throwing MJ out of his office was producer driven, though.

    And I’m going to have to call bullshit on Asa’s mama supporting that whole family in their nice house in LA. From working 70 hr wks as a visiting nurse. For $30K a yr. The same amount Asa says she’s got buried in gold coins under the porch. Of 1 of her houses she’s got. So either Asa’s as clueless as GG. Or being a Persian Pop Priestess pays way better than anybody guessed.

  2. 2
    labowner
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    What the fuck. Usually it is one person they single out for the bitch/bastard edit, but this whole crew sucks this season. Was I so enamored I didn’t see them for who they are?

    I love GG just because I can understand her. Anger/alcohol with a twist of spoiled crazy. That I can deal with.

    What in the hell is with Asa’s outfits. And I read a blurb she may win an oscar? Huh?

    Reza get over yourself. Do we know if he has his brokers license or just a real estate license?

  3. 3
    DagnyTaggart
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 7:30 pm

    Asa’s need for cash comes from a well-intentioned place? If that were the case, she’d have fewer ugly designer accessories and needlessly expensive crap and be helping her mom support her family. I thought it was horrifying to hear her talk about how hard her mom works and how little she makes after spending the season thus far talking about how much she spends on herself.

    At this point, Mike is the most likable character on the show, and that’s saying so, so little. GG desperately needs to be cut off financially by her parents – she’s a spoiled psychopath; Lily needs to stop acting like a bimbo and realize that Persian Cher is not a good look (and try to track down the rest of her original nose so she can speak with a normal voice again); Reza needs to never speak again – he’s never witty and the idea of him using some guy’s armpit like a scratching post is seizure-inducing; MJ needs to get herself in shape as she’s quickly turning into the bitter woman who lashes out at everyone around her because she’s so unhappy with her own life and appearance and can only elevate by trying to cut down the field; and Asa is delusional and should dig up her gold coins and buy her mom a dishwasher.

  4. 4
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 6:50 am

    I guess I’m the only one that likes these guys. I am not a GG fan. I don’t think that you can blame alcohol on all of your issues. I believe she says these violent things because she thinks it’s cool. It’s not.

    The model with curves was a joke. I am a thin girl and I probably have curves but I would never say such a thing because it offends others that are really curvy. A la Brooke from Basketball Wives.

    GG not knowing the budget for her projects is her own fault. Why doesn’t she be PROACTIVE and prepare a party and say this is how much it’s going to cost then the responsibility will fall on her sister to give her the go ahead on the launch party.

    I can see where Reza is coming from. If someone said something nasty like what GG said about my best friend I would take up for them. I wouldn’t let something like that slide. So I think this most recent siding with GG has really pissed EVERYONE off and people can’t believe she’s still hanging with GG.

  5. 5
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 7:00 am

    I am the only one that literally gets mad when these people are on TV?

    I’ve tried with the first three episodes, Lord know I did but I can’t stand these people and listen, Lilly Galichi? Bitch, you are so NOT fabulous. There is nothing more boring that a plastic skinny well mannered bitch on TV. Did you take lessions for Yoly on RHOBH on how to be the most boring, Cooter Lover?

    Sorry, I had to get that out. Man, these people piss me off.

  6. 6
    msjacqmills
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 7:33 am

    I was cracking up when GG’s sister called her out on her ridiculous knife/weapon love they showed last season. GG is trying soooo hard to be cool and tough and say all the right things – she looks like an ass. I can not believe she is 30 – what a loser!

  7. 7
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 11:54 am

    Is it possible to say @alloftheabove about these Priceless Persians? They are so awful they are wonderful, from the drunken tirades to the almost-but-not-quite-there microminikinis. Ah entrepreneurship.

    They just make me feel so good about myself.

  8. 8
    Kitkat
    Posted December 20, 2012 at 5:24 am

    #6 I agree…she is trying to come off as some kind of Angelina Jolie mysterious badass or something. I can’t believe she is 30, either. Her parents have enabled her into a perpetual teenage child with no personality. I saw her on WWHL w/ Andy and Cynthia from RHOA and she was so unbelieviably vapid it was painful to watch.

  9. 9
    plockness monster plockness monster
    Posted December 20, 2012 at 4:41 pm

    I borrowed “douche brigade” from my comment homies over at the Challenge recap, so I can’t take credit for it :)

    Reza is totallyyyy different from season one, and I hate it.

    Labowner – I agree about the edits this year. No one was likable this episode.

    DagnyT – lol at your entire comment! Persian Cher!!! Can I steal for the recaps???? Pleaseee!

    Gyp – my blood boils at least once an episode.

    I cant really say i like any of the Shahs. I CAN tolerate them at certain times. I am so glad that these people are such a train wreck. It makes for awesome television.

    I wish I knew the RH references! I guess I need to catch an ep.

  10. 10
    Petunia13
    Posted December 21, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    Hilarious recap!!!! And you got all the crucial details too.

  11. 11
    Aunt Dorsey
    Posted December 29, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    Asa the Persian Pop Priestess pompously toasting Omid for NOT getting a nose job took it over the fucking rainbow for me because of the fact that she phrased it so awkwardly that half the drunks at the table thought she was trying to insult him and not compliment him. I was rolling. She is queen of the twits.

    MJ is just a mess. She’s turning into a mini-me of her awful mother. Ten pounds of shit in a five-pound bag is not pretty girl. Don’t matter if you bought it on Rodeo Drive or not. And Lilly looks like a pneumatic blow-up doll with extra hair glued on. This buffoonery is so MUCH fun. Great re-cap!

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