Hi Gasmii! Welcome to another recap of Sister Wives. Thanks for your patience; I meant to get this up last night but my job interfered. What a bunch of jerks, amirite?? Any way, you’re a champ for sticking with me and the show. I love reading all of your comments and I’d like to give a shout out to leslilly for summing up this show better than I ever could: “Religion is weird and stressful. And expensive”
Anyhoo, If the Real Housewives are the scotch and soda of reality television, then Sister Wives has been the Ovaltine for the past couple of years. Most of the drama the Browns face pales in comparison to the drunken, eating-disorder laden, plastic surgery having backstabbery that takes place on other shows. I’ve always wondered whether TLC is holding out on us. Exhibit A: At the end of the last season, Madison (one of Janelle’s daughters) explained that she would not want to deal with the “drama” that comes with polygamy to which I asked, “what drama!?!” Due to the limits of time and space, Madison did not answer me.
Another tipoff that things are not always as calm as they seem: last season Christine and Janelle talked about how hard they had been on Robyn. Janelle even stated that she no longer feels like it is “her against Robyn” and we’ve NEVER seen Janelle treat Robyn like shit. Christine was apparently such a brat that she felt compelled to give Robyn an “I’m sorry” embroidery. Well four seasons in and TLC is FINALLY letting us see the struggle instead of just hearing about it. Let’s all get comfy as we watch the S.S. Multiply The Love get tossed about by the cold, harsh waves of reality!
“Seriously, pop a dramamine and hang on because shit is about to get REAL bumpy”
While much of last season focused on the kids, this episode zeroes in on the wives. Kody pledges to take each wife out on a date, which is a great way to introduce discussion about how hard it is to share your husband.
Before we get to the wives, let’s talk about Kody since he’s the center of the universe. GUESS WHO GOT ANOTHER CAR? Apparently Kody has retired the Lexus for a new set of midlfe wheels. The entire family waits for Kody to come home with the car like it’s the Wells Fargo Wagon and they’re the cast of The Music Man. They all freak out over how cool the car is. Don’t encourage him, people!
The screaming is for the CAR, Bro-Dad, not you. Simmer down.
Enough about the car. Kody explains each wife has to go without seeing him for four days a week because he has to spend time with each wife one on one. This time apart is hard on the wives; I bet it would be easier if they didn’t have to think about who he was boning on the nights he’s away. In any case, Kody says that it’s important that he gets alone time with each wife, and that they don’t all have to do everything together all the time. Thank goodness for that; I’m pretty sure there would be a lot more hair pulling, slapping, scratching, crying and breaking stuff if they were together 24/7.
For his date with Meri, Kody is finally keeping a promise he made to Meri 22 years ago; he’s taking her skiing! Dude, you made her wait 22 YEARS? And Meri, for shame! You’re telling me that in all of that time, you couldn’t hit up the mountain on your own or with friends?
Meri is super psyched to FINALLY get her wish. I have a feeling she is going to be disappointed since 22 years is a long time for excitement build up when the reality entails falling on your ass all damn day. This has the potential to be an epic fail for her.
Kody Hagar postulates that living apart is really harder on him than anyone else. This kind of made me want to punch the TV but I refrained because I can’t afford a new one. YOU? It’s hardest on YOU? You have it the easiest, sir! How many times a week to you spend as a single parent with a bajillion kids??? How many nights a week do you lie alone in your bed, choking on jealousy while your wife plays house with someone else? Whoa, this soapbox is making me dizzy! Time to get down.
“I can’t find my pants sometimes.” Well CRY ME A RIVER!