Sister Wives Recap: Date Night

Sister Wives

By LadyBaldy | Wednesday, May 23, 2012 | 3:00 pm | 23 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Recaps, Sister Wives

They’re going paintballing! It was Christine’s idea because she wants to shoot Kody over and over again. Who doesn’t, amirite? Kody has a surprise for Christine after they take out their aggression with paint. Good for you guys! Burn calories AND blow off some steam.

After paintball, Kody and Christine get into a party bus and go for a helicopter ride over Vegas! Christine is thrilled since she’s wanted to do this FOREVER! Was it 22 years ago? If not, don’t show your joy in front of Meri.

Armed with a fresh outlook on their marriage, Christine lets herself enjoy the helicopter ride. Kody explains that his relationship with Christine is based on their shared love of enjoying life and having fun. That sounds built to last.

Christine explains that growing up, she always knew she wanted to be a third wife because being a first or second wife looked like too much work. Being the second wife is like being a wedge, but the third wife gets to enjoy the marriage after the first and second wife have worked out the kinks. As she is saying this, I’m marveling at how she has spent her life stuck on the idea of “third” instead of “last”. Did Christine think that all plural marriages are capped at three wives, or did she miss the lesson in school where it is explained that “third” and “last” are not the same thing?

“Who has FOUR wives? That’s just stupid. Do they give out Olympic medals for fourth place? The playground rhyme goes “first is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the hairy chest” – fourth isn’t even MENTIONED. Oh and P.S., I do NOT have a hairy chest.”

When it was just Meri and Janelle, Christine came on board and helped balance things out. She made their lives a little bit lighter with her joy and tiebreakery. Subtext: Robyn came in and effed that up.

Christine is pleased with the date and calls a truce with Kody. She promises to be more grateful going forward thanks to Meri’s words of wisdom. Christine realizes that she has not been appreciating Kody and….and…and I can’t even keep typing along these lines because it’s killing me.

Back to Robyn! Robyn’s house is filled with a symphony of children’s coughs. Robyn is handling it as best she can even though she is tired. She spares us a sob story of how much harder it was to deal with sick kids before she married Kody and I count my blessings.

(cue the violins) “Before I married Kody, I had to sell my hair to buy medicine for my kids. No wait, that was Fantine in Les Mis. I relate to her a lot, except for the whoring.”

Kody and Robyn haven’t been on a date since Solomon was born! Since Solomon is not 22 years old yet, Robyn probably should not advertise this statement to Meri unless she prepared to look completely un-excited about her date.

It’s been a year and a half since Robyn signed on to Team Brown and she feels like she’s getting along with the other wives swimmingly. She and Christine have reached an understanding, which isn’t quite friendship or sisterhood, but it’s better than mutual resentment. Robyn wanted to be close to the wives really bad; she expressed this often in the previous seasons. Robyn is not willing to do ALL the work, however. The other wives need to want it too; they need to recognize that she really does love them, and be loving back. Well look who grew a spine! Robyn also mentions that sometimes one ends up with a sister wife who is not so nice, which sucks. While Robyn grew up around polygamy, this is her first time as a sister wife and one cannot help but wonder if she is thinking about someone in particular…

Kody shows up to Robyn’s for date night, and Robyn expresses how great Kody is for treating her children as if they were his own….on the one in four nights he’s there. Robyn LUUUUVS him for it, and Kody says that he’s got the ghost of his father in heaven nagging him to be a good dad to his step-kids. He’s in love with Robyn AND her kids. Also, I’m not sure if he’s talking about his own father or the heavenly father.

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LadyBaldy
About

LadyBaldy was raised by TV and thus has a completely warped version of what life is supposed to be like. She cannot have a conversation about anything without comparing situations and people to her favorite shows and movies. During the day, she works in clinical research and at night, she watches TV and discusses it with her cats.

23 Comments

  1. 1
    bautin
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 4:37 pm

    Yeah, that whole wedding reception in a gymnasium thing is totally standard in Utah, due to the fact that, you know, everybody is married within 4 years of graduating high school and can’t afford real venues. Most ward gym’s see more receptions than any actual sport.

  2. 2
    onie nicoll
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    loved your recap, i feel the same way, i think chrisine has been a bit naive, but it really seems that she is doubting her “marriage” to mr ego

  3. 3
    AmyOops
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    Wheee! A “Saved by the Bell” reference! Dead on, too. Back to reading :-)

  4. 4
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 6:51 pm

    I keep saying polygamy and modern ways love marriage don’t mix. I’m going to try to explain why so get ready to scroll.

    Some ways mix and some don’t. Take shoes in the house. If that’s a way you want to keep, fine. And fine if you don’t.

    But try to mix it, with some people leaving their shoes on and some taking them off, everybody gets the same outside dirt on their feet. And your rug.

    That’s why Meri’s advice was good and it also sucked. I’ll totally cosign the part about you can only change you.

    But a lot of it was more like something you’d say to a single mom trying to decide if some guy she was dating was boyfriend or dumpster material.

    They’d all be living as single moms most of the time no matter who their husband was. But you’re right about Bozo being stuck at 14. Christine can’t change that. She can put up, or she can bounce.

    I’m sticking by my theory that Christine’s the only 1 that had those romantic love marriage expectations to begin with.

    A modern ways love marriage is about personal feelings 1 particular person and you have for each other.

    Old ways marriage, polygamy or not, is about stuff you expect, like your roles in your families or tribe or whatever.

    Which is NOT the same as falling in romantic love with somebody that’s got the same goals and ideas you do. Because the number 1 thing is still that specific person and you guy’s personal feelings. Everything else is icing on the cake.

    With old ways marriage, personal feelings come after the wedding. Usually it’s more like affection and appreciating them as they get to know them as a person. That affection’s the icing on the cake. Falling in romantic love would be like winning power ball.

    It’s not that it never happens. But it’s not why they get married.

    My guess is when Bozo and the swives (except for Christine) talk about how much more “in love” they are now than their wedding day they mean that old ways kind of affection.

    But Christine wanted to be the 3rd wife of a guy that was in romantic love with all 3. I think now she’s starting to figure out 1) that’s not possible and 2) Bozo’s not into her like that.

    Their ways are to put their religion 1st. Which means sucking it up and putting up with Bozo.

    Bozo’s already done all he can to help Christine get those expectations down. She’ll have to do the rest for herself.

  5. 5
    Kimmi Paul
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    I have to agree. I think Christine has unreal expectations that has been fostered by her being the “baby” wife for 16 years. My thing is Meri’s advice was actually good. Any marriage counselor would tell you basically the same thing, change your attitude first, see what changes then go from there. Basically what Meri was telling Christine was if you always do what you always done, you will get what you always got. Christine is a bit like me where her emotion shows all over her face and she can’t hide it. So I am sure once Kody walks in the door her whole demeanor screams “Oh great, the ass is here….again.” And (I can’t believe I’m saying this) in his defense, who wants to walk into that? Maybe if she relaxes a little and calms down he will want to be there. Because lets be real, the problem with her and Kody only started when Robyn came into the picture. And the bigger bitch she becomes, the more in Kody’s eyes, Robyn is sweetest, bestest wife ever, and the angrier Christine gets. It’s a vicious circle.

    My hubby asked me what if we took another wife (we’ve been married for 17 years), I said GOOD, now she can deal with you. :)

  6. 6
    lovesthehobbitses
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 7:43 pm

    Can we PLEASE discuss Kody’s song to Meri at their wedding?? The falsetto? The length and repetition? Good lord.

  7. 7
    Closet Fan
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 10:17 pm

    Robyn has become the Marcia Brady of the group. As Meri and Cody were sitting in the ski lodge, Meri said (in her best Jan voice) … Robyn, Robyn, Robyn!

  8. 8
    Closet Fan
    Posted May 23, 2012 at 10:31 pm

    I am watching the show again now and wrote my comment before I started reading. So LadyBaldy I agree, lol :)

  9. 9
    notwithoutmytv
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 2:40 am

    Let’s get real: Kody Hagar is boning one wife. And that wife is not Meri, Christine, or Janelle.

  10. 10
    Wasabipeas wasabipeas
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 5:20 am

    OK @lovesthehobbitses! Here goes:
    Why did Kody sing a song about death at his wedding? Odd choice.
    Why did he sing harmony instead of melody when it was a solo?
    How come he didn’t have the words in front of him if he didn’t know them?

    AY, YI, YI!

  11. 11
    no cars go
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 5:44 am

    and i would give everything i own
    give up my life, my heart, my home
    i would give everything i own
    just to punch you kody brown

  12. 12
    Pat Ledoux
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 6:25 am

    Like the wives, especially Meri, but I can’t see the attraction for this clown. Kody is such a douche bag. Nuff said.

  13. 13
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 7:02 am

    @no cars go…No you didn’t! That was great.

    Baldy…you’re recaps are so well done! I kept nodding my head while reading the whole thing.

  14. 14
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 8:07 am

    LadyB, while I love, love, love your recaps, could you please stop it with all those close pix of KoDouche? My plants are beginning to wither. Thank you.

    Either that guy buys Viagra by the case, or he has some ‘splainin’ to do to at least some of the wives.

  15. 15
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 10:23 am

    Meri’s night: “Anal? Nah. I already did that with Robyn this week.”

    Janelle’s night: “Oral? Not feeling it. Robyn took care of that earlier this week.”

    Christine’s night: “Know what? I think I just sleep on the couch.”

  16. 16
    Kimmi Paul
    Posted May 24, 2012 at 7:00 pm

    Ok if we needed any more reason to think Kody is a D-Bag…

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/sister-wives-kody-brown-none-of-wives-can-satisfy-all-needs_n_1542439.html?ref=tv&ir=TV

    Such a man-child…

  17. 17
    Closet Fan
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 5:53 am

    Thank you for the link Kimmi. Ugh… who chose the UPS Brown color dresses for the wedding. “Brown”? Ugh again. Did I just answer my own question, lol.

  18. 18
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 6:55 am

    Kimmie’s, that was certainly an interesting article. Glad you sent it alone. What does the “lightness of being together” with Christine? Is that “lite” as in Lite Beer, meaning not much of it?

    Eeeewwwwwww. Every time I see him I hug HubbyCat. All of a sudden he has been wondering what’s up with that.

  19. 19
    leslilly
    Posted May 26, 2012 at 5:57 am

    Thanks for the shout-out, LadyBaldy! What a surprise! Now, back to your awesome recap…

  20. 20
    imani
    Posted May 28, 2012 at 8:24 am

    I don’t think Robyn ever wanted to share Kody with anyone. Her past marriage was monogamous. I thing Janelle is pretty much detached from all of them, and has shown that she can leave and make it on her own because in their book she talks about having left the family for two years. And when they moved to Utah i think she stayed behind with her five kids at that time. She initially lived with her mom and her mom’s sister wife who happens to be Kody’s mom. Kody’s dad is married to Kody’s mom and married Janelle’s mom after Kody got married to Janelle. After staying with her mom and in-laws for about six months, she and her five kids at that time, moved to their own home and she was able to survive quite well for two years, and then this lucrative contract with TLC came through and all the wives were on board for it. At one point all three wives had filed for bankruptcy. Meri has never connected with the other two wives and one of the reason’s Janelle left was because of a big blow up with Meri. Janelle at one time was married to Meri’s brother, but had no children by him. And Meri had problems with what had gone on between her brother and former sister-in-law. And Meri and Kody met Christine at some sort of youth camp where they were the camp leaders. And at some point decided to bring Christine in as the third sister wife. And so it remained… until 16 years later when Meri, her daughter and Kody met Robyn at a dance and Meri encouraged Kody to bring Robyn in as the fourth wife. Kody said he initially balked at the idea because Robyn had three kids from a previous marriage but eventually capitulated. And i think Meri did this to get back at Cristine and it has worked, maybe better than she thought. It is quite obvious that Meri does not like Christine and bringing in a younger fourth wife was more an act of vengence than anything else. In the end i think all the relationships Kody has with his four wives will implode and he will be left standing alone.

  21. 21
    Rebecca
    Posted May 28, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    Thank you so much for the hilarious and dead-on recap! You have made my day!

  22. 22
    annie Annie
    Posted May 29, 2012 at 2:50 pm

    When Kody said that line about “I spend more time with each individual wife than I do with the family as a whole” I was like…..whu whu whut? Im confused….is this about being a family, or having 4 relationships with 4 women? Maybe the words just came out wrong, I dunno.
    It’s going to be very interesting when they build the houses on the “Brown Cult-a-Sac” because then Kody will be closer to all women. He can’t have the excuse of “they live so far away I can only see each one every 4 days” But again, I have to ask….if it’s about being 1 family, why not all live under 1 roof? Isnt that what they did in Utah? Ehhhhh Im confused.

    I think Christine is just old-fashioned jealous, which is totally normal. She’s no longer the new wife…she feels replaced.
    There’s no freakin way I could share my man….even IF he drove a Lexus convertible (and randomly for 1 day a Nissan Convertible)

    P.S. Logan? Cuuuuuuute!

  23. 23
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted May 29, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Many books on the market discuss the problematic issues involved in polygamy. They are absolutely heartbreaking.

    “Predators, Prey, and other Kinfolk: Growing up in Polygamy” is the best. Others include “Stolen Innocence”
    Oh, so many.

    The point is that polygamy is difficult for and unfair to women. Many of the households are separate, and in many, many cases the husband drives expensive cars (often purchased with money earned by the wives) while the wives virtually starve.

    Go to Amazon and enter “polygamy nonfiction” and you will be amazed.

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