Recap: So You Think You Can Dance: Nepo-tastic!

It’s Vegas, part 2. Previously, the dancers cried. Tonight they will cry some more as we go from a pool of fifty dancers to our Top 20. Some people we know go through, but most of our Top 20 are strangers to the TV viewing audience. But the show really begins next week, so I don’t mind too much. It’s not the most thrilling episode of SYTYCD (there’s barely any dancing), but there’s still plenty of fodder ripe for mocking. This is SoYouThinkYouCanDance!I can’t figure out what instrument plays at the beginning of SYTYCD’s theme song. Are they horns making that sound? Is that a viola? I don’t know.

7pm at the MANDALAY BAY. Before the judges make their final decisions, each dancer will perform a solo. Dance for their lives, if you will. We get some clips, and they’re all pretty awesome, as they should be when we’re this close to the Top 20. Hey, I even recognize a few of these dancers!

I’ve got to be honest, I’m not a huge fan of Faina. I mean, she’s no Heidi. And then she brings the DRA-ma! After Faina walks off the stage, she apparently collapsed. It looks kind of serious for a moment, but turns out she’s just dehydrated. Unsurprising! Freaking dancers. Also she’s probably starving. Homegirl could use a sandwich and a cookie.

Is it just me, or is this fainting spell extremely well-produced?

After everyone finishes, Nigel asks to see a slew of them onstage right away. Among the names called is Olivia – the whiney crybaby whose mother may-or-may-not have cancer. Once they’re all lined up, Nigel delivers the bad news: they weren’t even good enough to be in discussion. They’re going home.

Some people take it pretty well. They’re upset, blah, blah, but thankful to have made it this far. Olivia, on the other hand is pissed that they’ve wasted her time. Because she’s worthless. She would rather have gone home in the beginning than to stay there and, ugh, work, God forbid, with all these people she didn’t like. Glad to know you cherished this once-in-a-lifetime experience.

Apparently 16 people got cut, because Cat explains that the remaining 34 dancers will have to wait backstage on shitty little folding chairs until the judges have made their decision. Lol, cheap, FOX.

You know it smells like feet in that room.

Up first is Kevin Hunt. No, we’ve never seen this guy before. And we won’t see him again, he’s not moving on. A few other nameless contestants are also rejected. Cat says that seeing other dancers go home builds tension in the holding room, but I would think it would make them happier since their odds just went up!

The next person the show has decided to spotlight is Danny Tidwell, the adopted brother of last year’s runner-up, Travis Wall. I would say something about spinning in the genes, but he’s adopted, so I guess it was all in his environment. Danny’s time in Vegas as not been that smooth, as Mia thought he wasn’t living up to his “brilliant reputation” and Shane thought he gave a “whack” attitude in his small group number. I don’t see what Shane was talking about at all there, but Shane really wanted to send him home.

Danny likens dance to therapy as he steps out onto the stage. Nigel begins by telling him to check his ego. I bet this would make a lot more sense if we’d EVER SEEN HIM BEFORE, but alas, we’re just going to have to go on Nigel’s word that Danny has an ego. Nigel makes him beg for it and then tells him they’ve decided to keep him.

When the judges are alone again Shane thinks they’re all going to regret putting him through in a couple of weeks. Way to voice your concern now. Mia worries that he has nothing inside. Ouch, and again, way to speak up before. Nigel, however, thinks the show is a “journey” and hopefully he’ll grow.

Ashley is now making her way to the stage. Since we’ve never seen her before either, Cat explains that the judges have loved her look and personality all through Vegas. But what about her dancing?? I guess we’ll get to find out in the coming weeks because Ashley is in our Top 20!

Continuing the love train, Dominic “D-Trix” is also in the Top 20. And after seeing two other people get through and jump for joy, Danny’s reaction does seem a little cold and soul-less. P.S. WTF is Lacey Schwimmer wearing?

Nepotistic fug.

Cedric would also like to be in our Top 20. He has a very interesting style – kind of a mix between popping and lyrical, and Mia Michaels is obsessed. Nigel makes a good case for getting rid of him, since he can’t dance any style but his own, but all the other judge want to keep him. Nigel apologizes to the Top 10 girls, though I think he should apologize for some of his letch-ier remarks before worrying about making amends for a bad partner.

Also through is a red-headed probable lyrical dancer, but I wouldn’t know, would I, FOX? I think I’ve found my early favorite based on nothing but ness in the girl with the ‘fro, also through to the Top 20.

…and then she pulled off her fro.

Tinny music plays as SYTYCD reminds the audience of Janet Bombard’s tearful background (she has one arm). Nigel remarks that he rarely cries, but she actually got him going. We see Janet telling her story to the judges in a flashback and it’s all very reminiscent of A Chorus Line, starring Nigel Lythgoe as Zach and Janet Bombard as Cassie. Throw her a rope to grab on to! Help her to prove that she’s strong!

Look! I’m feeling things!

The judges respect Janet enough to judge her just as they would judge any other contestant and unfortch, that means that Janet is not moving on. Tears for Janet, though I’m glad I finally figured out what is on that freaking sweatshirt. It’s not Gumby’s head, everybody. Those are cherries.

Some curlied-haired uggo-face is really sad to see Janet go. Wah, wah, she’s not dead, you know, just not on the show. And you very well might not be either! (Spoiler!)

The camera slow-pans up Ricky’s body as he waits to hear from the judges in the holding room. Like, really slow-pans. What is the deal? Ricky was that contemporary dancer that Mia loved and he continues the lovefest right back, explaining that working with her was the highlight of his week, since he could feel the “universe coming through [him]” as he danced her choreography.

The camera man is totally cruising this kid.

As soon as Ricky gets onstage, Nigel explains that he finds Ricky strange. Ricky child-molester-laughs that he’s heard that before. Someone check this guy’s freezer for dead animals. Well Mia thinks he’s perfect, despite the fact that Ricky admits he very well could be “bad strange” and Ricky is in the Top 20! Ricky has weeks of Nigel calling him a freak ahead of him.

Anya and Pasha, the hot Russian couple from the New York auditions are both through as well. Faina knows this doesn’t bode that well for her, knowing that two ballroom dancers are already part of the Top 20. I wouldn’t put her through, because she’s definitely weak, or at least an attention whore, like the great fainting Morganza from Project Runway. Mary meanly pulls a fake-out on Faina, which I think is unfair since English is not her first language, but in the end Faina is through, so who cares? Me! I don’t think she’s very good!

Lauren Gottlieb either has the tiniest head or the biggest neck. As she steps in front of the judges, Nigel begins right off addressing the issue of her working for the show in previous seasons. Lauren is ultimately through, but Nigel warns that this probably means they will be tougher on her to eliminate any pretenses of favoritism. Lauren scurries out with all the grace of a water buffalo. As she goes backstage to where the other contestants are waiting, Lauren hides coyly behind the curtain, then screams and I officially can’t stand her.

Kinda hating you.

Sara is the only b-girl left in the competition and hopes it will help her stand out from all these lyrical and ballroom dancers. She’s right and Sara is through. Nigel tells her to start practicing her Viennese (Vietnamese) Waltz.

Also through is the hot pink-mohawked Kameron, who is another contestant I like based on je ne sais quoi after two seconds. A variety of others are through, including 3 contemporary dancers and Jesùs “Chuy,” who was auditioning for the show to gain his father’s acceptance of dance.

A blonde in a bikini does not make it through, though the judges tell her to come back another year because she was one of their favorites. Yeah, sucks to be the 11th best right now.

Jessi Piralta, my arch-nemesis is up next. I agree with all the commenters who find her utterly mediocre. Also, she’s balding. But for WHATEVER reason, the judges put her through after the meanest fake-out yet. Jessi cries that she probably would have quit dancing if she hadn’t gotten on the show because she’s, GULP, 25. As a 23 year-old I can comfortably say yeah, get off the stage you old, mediocre GEEZER!

She walks back to the holding room sobbing and milks it a little bit before telling everyone she made it. Reeeeaaaally not a fan.

OMG what a coinky. I’m sobbing too.

We see some more people get cut, including my early favorite, Caitlin Cucciara. She was awesome throughout Vegas, but seemed to falter in the group number. The judges hope she comes back another year with that much more training and experience.

With only 1 male spot left, and Hok and Twitch still waiting to hear, the two friends are sad that one will have to go for the other to stay. I’m sure they’re super-stressed, so that’s not helping things, but BOYS, it’s just a show. I think the producers should make it clear to the contestants that they’re not actually dancing for their lives.

Man, you smell really good.

They go onstage together, so as to maximize the drama. Both of these breakers are great at their own genre, but struggle with other styles of dance. Hok was just a little better I guess, and he is in the Top 20. Unsurprising, given Hok’s personality. Hok really doesn’t seem that happy to be on the show and the judges remind him he should be happy he got on the show. Cheer up!

As for the girls, it’s down to Lacey and some girl named Kristin, that we’ve never seen before. Both of them want it so badly, and poor Kristin, you’re probably better than Lacey (another girl I find mediocre), but of course, Lacey is through. “Shut the front door.” She tells them. No open it! You’re totally underservingly in the Top 20!

“BITCH is only on ’cause of her brother.”

Nigel tells Lacey she “barely scraped in,” which makes me think she got in because of Benji EVEN MORE. I don’t know why I’m so anti-Lacey (probably this faux-goth thing she has going), but she really bugs me.

So we have our Top 20, and I look forward to getting to know them better over the next 2 weeks. What kinds of ridiculous fashion do we have to look forward to from Cat? Who’s your early favorite? Who do you think will choke first?