Tonight we celebrate episode 100. There will be laughter, there will be tears (or replays of tears), we will revisit great performances of the past, and revile brand new ones. Are You Ready?? THIS. Is So You Think You Can Dance (dance……..dance)!
I have to say even though Cat looks hot hot hot tonight, her dress is a little disturbing. And ugly. But she sure does wear it well.
I’ve always wanted an outfit that put two leopard eyes directly under my boobs.
The opening number this week is danced to “One” from A Chorus Line. I love that show so freaking much, I cannot even tell you. It’s a must see for any dancer.
This interpretation on the number still involves mirrors, but they’re all cracked. Okay. I’ll go with it. I am immediately impressed that Tyce was able to put together such an awesome Broadway routine. Little did I know at the time that it was actually Mia who had done the choreography.
You know, as much as I can’t stand Mia, she is a fucking awesome choreographer. Yes, she has had some duds, but most of the time I really love the dances she creates. I just wish she wasn’t such a mega bitch because it would be so nice to be able to like her. So the show is off to a great start.
Cat tells us the show is packed tonight. There will be three Emmy award winning routines, a look back at some of the show’s “best moments”, and an amazing performance from the “rather wonderful” Katie Holmes.
So you all know how I feel about this, we’ve been through it all already. But lest you think I have just been blinded by the sexiness of Mr. Hugh Jackman, let me assure you, the man can sing and dance. Don’t believe me? Take a look…….
See? So yes, I say I wish they had gotten him to be on the show partly because I adore him and think he’s the sexiest man on earth, but also because I think he would have been FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC. Can anyone say that about Katie Holmes? Well, I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
Ellen is missing from the judges’ table this evening; I’m guessing she’s sitting home in a dark room drinking heavily after the trauma of sitting between Nigel and Mary. But that’s just a guess.
Cat talks to Mia first, saying she’s been here since the beginning, what has been the best thing for her? You know, other than trampling on the dreams of kids and making them cry. It’s the little babies coming back to the nest, and showing what they have learned from the show, making the progression to choreographer, getting nominated for Emmys (Yay Dmitry!), and the professionalism that this show breeds.
Wait. She’s not done. She couldn’t be more proud of being mamma Mia on a show like this. Did she just really call herself a mamma?? Is she fucking delusional? Oh wait, maybe she is a mom, you know, one of those that WANT TO KILL HER KIDS!!! What the fuck? Oh yeah, telling people she wants to stab them in the face, take a hammer to their shoulder blades, and her general love of cutting all make her mother of the year in my book.
Christina! Bring me the axe.
Cat asks Mary what being a hundred means to her. Oh Lord, here we go with the botox thing again. Mary simply cannot keep herself from beating that dead horse into the ground over and over and over again. Yes, it was funny the first time, it hasn’t been since then. Stop.
Nigel thinks I’m funny
No he just tells you that so he can bang you. Mary says that this show means the world to her, and it’s changed her life. She starts getting choked up saying it’s been a lot of
cackling laughter, a lot of tears. Some not so good dancing, and the most brilliant dancing she has ever seen in her entire life. I guess I should mention that there is a section of the audience with dancers from seasons past, shouldn’t I?
There are more of them, but this is all you’re getting
Cat asks Nigel what the best part has been for him. He thinks that television at its best can reach out and unite a country with a shared experience. He thinks that happened last night with Tyce’s routine. Yes, it was the shared experience of you forcing an emotional response from us by stamping the cancer label on a dance!!! I think I’m still sharing the experience of being pissed off about that with many people across the country. Thanks!!!
He says he’s received so many calls, one from Olivia Newton-John who is a breast cancer survivor. She told him that that routine said more than words could. He’s extremely proud that a show like this can shed that sort of light on a difficult subject.
Did I miss something? What light has been shed on breast cancer from that routine? Look, I get it, Tyce wanted to build a piece in tribute to his friend, but let’s not pretend that this is the first time any of us has ever heard of this thing called breast cancer. You know what would have been really great, Nigel? If you had pointed people toward one of the many breast cancer websites or organizations that exist out there like the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. That would have been something to be proud of.
Ugh. I’m getting all pissed off all over again. Shake it off.
Before we get to any results, Cat wants to show us some highlights of the past five seasons. Cue clip reel. Nigel wants them to bring it. Various good auditions. People falling on their asses. Awesome breakers.
And for some reason they show that idiot Sex AGAIN. And they wonder why he keeps showing up. Ugh. I’m not showing him. I’ve made a substitution.
Isn’t that better?
Shots of people screaming because they’ve made it through to Vegas. People hurt. People crying. People being told they made the top twenty. Shots of opening numbers that I now need to go back and watch again.
And this douchebag.
I had forgotten how much I hated that idiot. Shots of some of the awesome dances that this show has had, making me more determined than ever to go back and rewatch them all. And finally, shots of the winners of the past four seasons.
God, I love this show. Even when it pisses me off royally, which it has done quite a few times. I love that this show exists, that these dancers get the opportunity to show us what they can do, and that they get to work with some of the most amazing choreographers out there right now.
I’ve gone a bit sappy, I think, but as someone who danced for many many years and loves dance SOOO much, this show makes me so happy. Happy for those of us that are dancers, past and present, and even happier that it’s opened up the world of dance to people that know nothing about it from a technical point of view, but love it and are moved by it. Dance has always been there for me in my life in times of happiness, sorrow, joy and pain. It’s a timeless art form that keeps evolving but respects its past. I love dance and I love that this show allows all of us to share in that together.
Okay. Enough of the hearts and flowers and kisses and hugs. I must be PMSing, I’m not normally this sappy. Note to self: avoid all Kleenex and Hallmark commercials for the next week.
Before we get to the results Cat reminds everyone about the tour. After that, it’s time for a recap of what happened last night. People danced, judges cried, Ellen was Ellen, Mia was Mia, and Shane gave us an incredible zombie routine.
Results time. Ladies first.
First up is Melissa. We all know she’s safe. I just hope she sent Tyce a huge cookie bouquet or something because that routine really saved her ass this week. Cat jumps over to the other end of the line to talk about Kayla. She is in the bottom two tonight. Not really a surprise given the fact that she’s been in the bottom several times before. I actually liked her more this week than I have before, so go figure.
Now it’s down to my two favorite girls. Jeanine and Janette. I don’t want either of them to be in the bottom. These are the girls I want to see in the finale. Unfortunately one of them has to be in the bottom and that girl is……..Janette. I can’t even say poo about it because I wouldn’t have been happy the other way either. Pfft.
We’re going to take a break from results now and revisit a routine from season past. This one is The Hummingbird and The Flower, danced by Jaime and Hok, choreographed by Wade Robson.
I remember how much I loved this dance the first time. Wade is a fucking genius. He took things that Hok does well, and incorporated them into this hummingbird character for him. And Jamie…..whoa. That girl has amazing control, and gorgeous lines which Wade also used beautifully in this routine. They danced it just as beautifully now as they did before. Love it.
Time for the guys results.
Cat is starting with Ade. I think we all know where this is going to go, don’t we? Just to mix it up a little she decides to talk to Jason first before giving both of them their results. No surprises happen, and Jason ends up in the bottom two.
So now it’s down to Evan and Brandon. Done deal. Evan is definitely in the bottom. Except that he’s not. Brandon is. What?!
Someone’s not happy about that
And someone looks happier than they should be to see their partner in the bottom
Time for another blast from the past. This time it’s going to be Mia’s Bench Routine performed by Heidi and Travis.
You know, I never really liked Heidi too much while she was on the show. I mean, she danced well, but she was always pulling faces, and that annoyed me so much that I could never really get behind her. Until this dance. This was another one of those dances that I really loved the first time I saw it, not just because I loved the choreography, but because of the dancers. I think it was the first time I actually liked Heidi during a dance.
You know, that’ll be one of the reasons I’ll always love that addiction piece – it was the first time I liked Kayla and felt connected to her during a dance. It’s something that Mia does quite well; getting her dancers to connect to the material in a real way, that makes us go there with them. Another reason why I love so much of her work.
Up next we have the repeating of the solos from last night. Up first is Kayla.
Like I said last night, this is actually her first solo that I’ve liked. I think I like it even more this time around without the shakiness that wasn’t part of the choreography. We don’t get any judges words after the solo; we just go right into the next solo. This time it’s Jason.
I’m still not crazy about it. Moving on, time for Janette.
I can’t help but think that this solo is a big part of the reason why she is in the bottom tonight. I really think that she should have stuck to something more upbeat. Note to all future dancers on this show: if it ain’t broke, don’t try to fix it.
Last, but not least is Brandon.
It actually played as a little less stripperific this time around. I’m guessing it’s because he’s wearing a shirt. The funny thing is that I liked it better with his shirt on. Which surprised me, because I don’t have anything against shirtless boys.
As you ALL KNOW.
Now it’s time for another encore performance. This time it’s a group routine. Cat says it’s one of their best ever, and I agree. It features Travis, Dmitry, Donyelle, Benji, Ivan, Allison, Martha and Heidi. But Cat’s got a special surprise in store for us. In order to make this performance even more special Wade Robson will be dancing it with them!!! Fucking A. I love that.
I fucking love this dance. I love that Wade is dancing it with them. How awesome must that have been for them to get to dance with him on stage? I also love that he didn’t put himself front and center for the entire piece but gave others the spotlight as well. Have I told you lately how much I love Wade? Well, I’ll tell you again. I LOVE him.
You know what I really wish they would have done? Actually talked to some of the dancers that have been on the show in past seasons. Instead of the extended clip fest in the beginning, maybe have brief conversations with them about what their time on the show meant to them, and what they’re doing now. Did the show open more doors for them? Do they look back on their time there fondly? You know I’m not normally one for filler, but I actually would be interested to hear what they’ve thought of the show, and how it’s helped them, if at all. Oh, well. Maybe at 200.
We take a quick break for some commercials, and when we get back Cat tells us they have had some amazing guest performances on this show, none of them have been as exciting as this next one. The gorgeous Hugh Jackman!
Oh shut up! I’m playing make believe!
Of course it’s not Hugh, because who would want to see that when we can enjoy the treat of Katie Holmes? But before her performance, Cat sat down to talk with her in a pre-taped interview.
Blah blah blah Dizzy Feet Foundation blah blah
She talks about how this performance is sort of an homage to Judy Garland, and she’s really excited about it. Cat points out that not only is Katie dancing on this, she’s also singing. They talk a bit about the charity, basically going over the same things that we were told when Nigel rolled the whole thing out on the show. And I’ve already said that I love the idea, but using a lot more words. On to the performance!
First of all, I’m pissed that none of this is live. What a crock of shit. Second, if you’re going to tape the performance it had better kick ass backwards, forwards, upside down, right side up and all the way to Sunday. This does not. Nor does it even come close. AND she’s lip syncing in the taped performance of this number. Badly. Are you fucking kidding me? How exactly is this the performance of a lifetime?
Ugh. You know who’s not afraid to perform live? I know that you know who I’m talking about.
So I’m going to go off on a little tangent here. Apparently Nigel is pissed that people actually have the nerve to say that they didn’t like the performance. He’s threatened to ban people from following him on Twitter, he’s saying she’s had no formal training and that she did it for charity. All true.
I would have had less of an issue with the entire thing if they hadn’t hyped it up so much. You don’t bill something as the performance of a lifetime and then give us that tepid pre-recorded vanity piece. I’m sorry if Nigel doesn’t want to hear that, but it’s true. Personally, I think she would have been better off performing live. Even if the vocals weren’t dead on, she would’ve gotten points for being out there with no dubbing, and no retakes.
I think it’s great that she wanted to do something for the charity, but we get enough canned, lip-synced performances from this show on a weekly basis. To have had the courage to just get out there and dance and sing LIVE, now THAT would have made an impression.
Before they get to the results, Cat asks Nigel if he has anything he wants to say. Of course he does silly. He wants to thank Katie, and everyone else that worked on the routine, and that have worked for free for the foundation. He also points out that Judy Garland’s son, Joey Luft, is in the audience and isn’t it just great that he got to see that performance.
If you say so
It’s now time to find out who is getting the boot tonight, based on your votes. Ladies first. The girl that polled the lowest number of votes sending her home tonight is…….Janette.
WHAT. THE. FUUUUUUUUCK?!?!?!?
Look! Even Kayla’s own grandparents can’t believe it.
How did that happen? That really sucks. There goes one of my picks for the last two girls. See what happens when Mia calls you her favorite? I’m just saying. Last night she calls Janette her favorite dancer this season, and Kayla perfection. Who’s in the bottom? And who gets sent home? I blame it all on Mia.
After they show the good-bye montage Cat says that she thinks this is the shock of the season. Nigel pipes up to say that often his favorites don’t win, but he has to say, on this occasion, that Janette was his favorite and he really wanted her to win this year. It’s ruined the 100th celebration for him.
Wah Wah. Shut Your Piehole
He thinks America got it wrong. That pisses me off. First of all, how disrespectful is that to the other dancers left in the competition? Wow. I thought Kayla was perfection Nigel. You’ve been blowing smoke up her ass all season long, but she should have gone home instead of Janette?
I personally would have rather seen Kayla go home this week, but I’m not a judge on the panel saying that. I hate when they pull that shit. It’s obnoxious and disrespectful and annoying. This show is set up to be a popularity contest. I don’t like that, but I didn’t set it up that way. YOU DID, Nigel. SHUT. UP.
Cat asks Janette what she’s going to take away with her from the competition. She says more than anything this made her realize how much she really really loves to dance. She was working in a bank and going to school for finance, and this has made her realize that she is meant to dance and she is going to keep on doing that.
You go girl
And I have one more thing to say regarding Janette. I will say that it would seem that I was wrong about her. I’ve liked her dancing throughout the competition, but her personality grated on me for a lot of it. I always thought that she would be the type to be snotty or backtalk if she was given harsh critique. We’ll never really know for sure since that didn’t happen, but I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt given the graceful way she is accepting defeat here. I will definitely miss her in these last couple of week of competition.
Time for the boys results. Jason’s going home. You can tell he knew it. Although I did think Brandon looked slightly nervous given what happened with the girls. So the sad thing for me about Jason going now is that I think he’s been finally coming into his own. I guess it’s just too little, too late.
We get his good-bye montage and then Cat asks him if there’s anything he’d like to say. He wants to thank everyone that has helped him get to this point because he never thought that he could ever be here in a million years. He says it has been an amazing experience.
So there you have it, Gasmi. Another two dancers are out. What did you think of this week’s results? I have a feeling that some of you are very very upset. What do think about Evan managing to avoid the bottom again? Do you think he’ll make it to the finale? Are you with me wanting to Jeanine to win the shebang? If not, who do you want to win?
And what did you all think of the Katie Holmes performance? Were you as disappointed as I was? Do you think that it would have been better received if it was live? Or was there someone else you would have rather seen? You all know my thoughts, and I’m going to end this recap with more video of my choice for guest performance for this evening. This is an excerpt from The Boy From Oz, in fact it’s one of the numbers with Judy Garland (as portrayed by Isabel Keating). I bet her son enjoyed this more.
Until next week…..