Contrary to what Cat said last week, THIS is the most important performance show of the competition. The dancers will show us why they are the top four, and their performances will help us decide who our favorites are. The judges will remain impartial, praising and critiquing everyone as fairly as possible. After all, they wouldn’t want to tell you who to vote for. THIS. Is So You Think You Can Dance (dance….dance)!

Note from Nigel: You are allowed to vote for anyone but the person wearing a white shirt.
Cat is not standing on the balcony as she usually does. That is because tonight they are at the Kodak Theater, home of the Academy Awards. OoO, aren’t we special? In fact, this is such a special occasion that Cat has asked a four year old to design her dress for this evening. Armed only with a trash bag, glitter and a glue gun, the child prodigy was able to put together this STUNNER.

On sale soon at a craft store near you.

In other news, Cat’s been eaten by a pumpkin.
Joining Mary and Nigel at the judges’ table this evening is Adam Shankman. Cat wants to know what he thinks of the final four. There were people that he thought would be there that aren’t (Janette, maybe? Ade? Spill it, Shankman!!), and then there are people that he had no idea would be here.

I didn’t actually SAY Evan; don’t put words in my mouth!!!
He talks about the tenacity and talent of the top four, but has to stop to say how awesome he thinks it is that millions of people are tuning in to see dancers. I think it’s pretty awesome too, Shankman.
Mary says that dancers feed off energy and tonight they will be feasting because there are three thousand fans here tonight at the Kodak.

Make that 2,999
Cat wants to know if Nigel has anything to say to the final four. He says that this is like a gunfight at the OK Corral; they’ve got to come out and they’ve got to do it. Huh? Oh. He’s not done. “No one is giving them this favorite dancer title; they’ve got to earn it. And they are privileged to be in this fabulous theater.” I still don’t understand how that relates back to the gunfighting.

It does because I said it does.
The first dance we will get to see is a group number with all four dancers. Choreographed by Wade and Amanda Robson. YAY YAY YAY!!!!!! I love Wade! WOO!
The story of this dance is two football jocks hitting on two cheerleaders, and the cheerleaders turn out to be way more than the jocks can handle. Yay??? Okay, he’s gonna do something really off the wall, right? Like make the cheerleader vampires or zombies or werewolves or something, right?

They should show Wade dancing on every show.
Hey! I have an idea for next season. Instead of lame-o musical guests, how about each week a different choreographer performs? Imagine it now….Wade, Shane, Jean Marc and France……I would love to see that!
Alright, sorry. I got distracted for a minute. Back to this season. The final four are dancing to “Boys Boys Boys” by Lady GagMe Gaga. And there are no zombies. There are no vampires. There are jocks, and there are cheerleaders. And there is disappointment.


Wrapped in red sparkly panties
Was this a joke? Or some sort of statement to Nigel? That’s the only thing I can think of. This has to be the most Un-Wade routine ever. I’m at a loss for words. I think I might hate this routine even more than that freaking fox dance. At least the fox dance has the usual Wade strangeness to it. This was more like something we’d see from Tabitha and Napoleon or **gasp** Tyce.

et tu, Wade?
The judges don’t comment on the dance at all, which is a good thing because if I heard them praising this I may just puke. Instead, Cat tells us we’re minutes away from starting the competition (did that dance not count or something?), but first she has something special to show us.

An extended commercial for season six

How was that special?
I dunno, Hugh. I don’t have ALL the answers! Jeesh!
Back from commercials Cat mentions again that they are at the Kodak Theater in Hollywood, and I wonder if it was part of the contract that she has to mention Kodak Theater a bunch of times or something. Or maybe she thinks we forgot where we are.
Anyway, Jeanine and Evan are up first, and they have Sonya as their choreographer. Sonya tells us that this piece is about a guy who is trying to keep his girl, but she doesn’t care anymore. She’s over it, and throwing him around, saying no, and running away. He sounds like a stalker. Maybe she should try calling the cops.
Jeanine tells us that Evan is doing great, he is the ideal punching bag, and Evan warns us about Jeanine’s violent side. She does seem to be having a lot of fun “pretending” to kick and hit Evan. Between her whacking Kayla in the face last week and now this, I’m beginning to think I want to be her best friend!! Even Sonya gets in on the action!

They’re dancing to “Heartbreaker” by MSTRKRFT ft. John Legend.



LOVED this dance. It definitely was much more of a showcase for Jeanine than Evan, but I think he really sold it. It wouldn’t have worked as well if he wasn’t selling that desperation at wanting to keep her. They did good.
Cat goes to Adam first asking him what he thought. He thought it was really really great. He says this is going to sound really weird, but listen. They are like a bunch of nevers. He never saw Jeanine coming, and she has dominated week after week. He says he so underestimated her, “And I sort of can never forgive myself.”
He also never saw Evan in the top four. But this season would never be the same without him. He says Evan is like the molehill that became the mountain on this show. Wha?

Mary thought that the two of them would be a good partnership and she says she was right. She tells Jeanine that she stood out a little bit more for her, but Evan held his own. Nigel tells Evan that this is the last time he wants to see him thrown about the stage tonight. Well, I sure hope none of the other choreographers have him being thrown about then!
Nigel says to him if he brings a big enough personality, he can do this. He is well loved by the public, but he now has to step up and own it. He says there were great things in the piece, but it showed to him just how strong Jeanine has become, both in technique and in personality.
Solo time. Brandon is up first, but before he dances Cat did a little interview with him. Let’s see what he had to say.
Cat wants to know how he is enjoying the show so far. He’s having a blast, and he’s learned so much. Cat wants to know who he misses the most, and that would be Janette because he wouldn’t be how he is right now if it wasn’t for her. Favorite routine? Tango with Janette.
On to happier things. Cat wants to talk about Mia. We’re treated to a flashback of her being a fucking asshole bitchface to him, and then her backpedaling bullshit. Brandon thinks she was giving him tough love.

The face of denial
He is performing his solo to “Dies Irae” by Karl Jenkins. Is this music from The Omen or something? Sounds like it. I swear it sounds like they are chanting “He is sexy, he is sexy” over and over. Once I hear that I cannot block it out for the life of me.



There is no denying he is a powerhouse, but this solo is both too much and not enough. If that makes sense. It feels somewhat desperate, and like he was trying to get in as many tricks and leaps as possible, but he forgot about drawing in the audience. It felt on the verge of being out of control. I love him, and I think he’s an amazing dancer, but it is not my favorite solo he has ever done.
What did Adam think? “That was competing!” He says Brandon threw that down on the floor, and it was a very take no prisoners routine. However, he does not get the board shorts with it. I know! He probably should have worn those same shorts from last week. I wonder why he didn’t?

Because he didn’t even bother to wash them before returning them. I wasn’t about to lend them to him again!!
Mary says he gave her goosebumps. She calls him dynamic and says he defies gravity. She thinks he is born to dance. She starts getting all choked up and teary-eyed while talking to him, and that’s one thing I do love about her. When someone gets to her, she really is an old softie.
Nigel’s just gotta say, “And Mary might not like this….”, but he agrees with Mia. He IS amazing. Great fakeout, Nigel. He says last week Brandon showed everyone where he was coming from (and what he was bringing with him!). His solo last week was totally outstanding. This week Nigel thinks that he has just wiped out the competition. Oh how I love it when Nigel is “witty”.

SHUT. UP.
After a commercial break, it’s time for the next couple to take the stage. This time it’s Kayla and Brandon, dancing Broadway with Tyce. He tells us the piece is “Bye Bye Life” from All That Jazz. I LOVE that movie sooo much. Tyce informs us he’s taken it to a much more showy place. That shall remain to be seen.




They lose it a bit in the turning section; it looks like Kayla falls behind Brandon in the timing, but other than that, I enjoyed it. One thing I must take issue with though is Tyce saying he took it to a showier place. Has Tyce seen this movie? No one does showy the way that Bob Fosse does showy.
If you haven’t seen it, please rent this movie immediately. It has all of Fosse’s signature choreography in it, and it will give you great insight into Fosse since it is semi-autobiographical. The semi part being that the character is not named Bob Fosse. THIS is the film version of the number.
So tell me. Is Tyce’s piece showier? I think NOT.
On to the judging. I think this will be well received, with the only critique really being about their timing issues during the turns.
Adams jumps up and down as he tells them, “That was SO GOOD.” He tells them that they are the two he always saw ending up in this place so he’s not surprised to see them here. But to see them dance together is just heaven. He thinks there is nothing that Kayla can’t do. (coughchoreographadecentsolocough), and Brandon was an animal out there. They tore it up.
Mary yells out “You guys are terrific, are you kidding me?!?” She thinks they’re rock stars and dance stars, and they have been front runners for her since the beginning. Did she just call them rock stars? But she doesn’t stop there, oh no. THEN she calls them superheroes. Now I object.

She’s joking, right?
Nigel thinks they’ve just shown everyone why they are in the top four. He says they were absolutely superb together and worked well together, “I mean, they were doing hopping pirouettes a la second together.” UMMMM, NO. They were not. Is he fucking kidding me?!? They were not together. This is now gonna piss me off. You can bet your ass that if Evan were in this dance it would have been pointed out that they were not together, and I’m sure blamed on him. That is such crap that he didn’t say anything about them being out of sync.
He also gives props to Tyce, not only for this routine but for all the routines throughout the season that he’s given us and says he’s the only choreographer he knows who is named after a cookie. Cat chimes in with a “And just as tasty!”

Says who?
And then he pervs out for the first time this evening talking about when he had his heart attack there was a beautiful blond girl throwing her leg over him. He might have had another heart attack if that had happened. He might never have come back from that.

Missed Opportunity
Time for Jeanine’s pre-solo sit down with Cat. Jeanine asks Cat, “How’s life?” Cat wants to know who’s doing the interview. Facts we learn from Cats interview with Jeanine include that Jeanine starting dancing when she was three, she didn’t want to dance, her mom made her dance, she’s now glad her mom made her dance. But I want Cat to ask the questions we all really want the answers to.

Like “Why are you wearing purple high tops with a yellow dress?”
They have a cute segment where they talk about the Russian Folk Dance, and Cat says “What the folk?” Hee. I love Cat. So Jeanine says she was worried about it, and ready to have a panic attack, but Phillip talked her through it. Awww. And then we revisit Nigel insulting the dance that he brought on the show. What’s that, like five or six times now?
Cat asks her what her favorite dance has been. The Travis piece she did with Jason. Yeah, that was a good one. Jeanine talks about the partnership with Jason and how great it was that there was no awkwardness or tension because it was a very intense piece in a subtle way. Cat’s like Subtle?!? Hardly. And then calls out the fact that they had a full on “smoocheramaroonie”. Jeanine replies that the kiss was not choreographed. Ooooo, tell us more! She doesn’t.
She is performing her solo to “Por Una Cabeza” by The Tango Project.



Her solo was fucking awesome. When she did those turns and slowed them down before stopping? Holy crap! THAT is some incredible control this girl has. What I love the most about the solo is that it isn’t just a string of tricks and leaps; she had little moments choreographed, and there was style and drama. Her solos are another reason why I love her, but the difference between her and Evan is that I actually love her partnered dances as well and think she is a great partner.
Let’s see what the judges thought. Adam? He’s on his feet clapping. And so are Mary and Nigel and the rest of the audience. Standing ovation for Jeanine!! WOO!!! Adam says, “Are you kidding?!?” He asks her if she knew she was going to be able to do the pirouettes (slowing down thing), and she’s shaking her head no, and he says “Dude, that was a risky solo.” He thinks she killed it. He tells her that all the warmth and kindness and beauty she has comes through in her dancing. And she didn’t need the flower. She is the only beautiful thing that should be up on that stage.
Mary says from the first time she saw Jeanine she has always been a standout. She says Jeanine is peaking right at the right time (true), she’s been growing every week and she has elevated every single partner she has had.
Nigel says it was such a brave solo, and talks about how you don’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket. That reminds me, I have to buy a powerball ticket tonight. Thanks Nigel. He says she’s in the final two as far as he’s concerned. Nigel, shut your fucking mouth; I don’t need you messing this up for her.
After some brief pimpage of the tour we move on to the guys. Their dance together will be pop jazz choreographed by Laurieann Gibson. She tells us she is going to push them to the place of no return. But they still have other dances to do! Clips of rehearsal and she is boom katting all over the place. Brandon tells us the piece is that he and Evan are in a battle to win. How literal.
They are dancing to Janet Jackson’s “Nasty Boys”.



So before I even say anything about the dancing, I have to make a comment about the music cut. Why the hell did they keep in the part about “Miss Jackson if you’re nasty”? It kind of takes away from the fact they they’re supposed to be tough guys. Stupid.
I actually thought they did really well with this. The trouble for Evan in this piece is that Brandon is such a powerhouse; he’s almost got no chance. Brandon hit everything hard; Evan had his usual smooth style. I thought Evan acted the piece better, he gave more face. But I think that ultimately Brandon won out in this number. Not surprising, is it?
Adam tells Evan he got a little dusted. The audience starts to boo him, and he tells them this is his job, but then is all “Can you guys be nice to me again?” He says he couldn’t get rid of Evan’s natural sweetness. He had the character, but it felt like a character whereas Brandon got in there and got nasty with it.
Mary asks Evan what’s the nastiest thing he’s ever done. Cat tells his grandmas to cover their ears. Brandon says, “I’m excited.” Evan thinks that’s a toughie, and then says the list is too long.

Well played young sir.
She doesn’t think he really has done anything nasty, and that’s the whole point; he is so sweet and lovable. She thinks Brandon did a little bit of a better job. Nigel says that all the choreographers think that Evan’s work ethic is beyond reproach. But there isn’t a nasty bone in his body. He thinks Evan has a choochie face. Not sure what that is? Nigel will demonstrate for you.

And then Cat starts pinching his cheeks. Nigel thinks you can’t put him into something like “Nasty Boys” and have it sit comfortably. Also? Brandon out danced him. I’m really starting to get pissed off. While I agree that Brandon hit it harder and edged him out, it seems to me that Evan is getting the critique tonight while other people are just getting praise. Has Nigel learned nothing? I really don’t want to see Evan win because his fans get a bug up their butts about the way he’s being treated tonight.
It also doesn’t sit comfortably with me. I’m not against them been critiqued, but please do it fairly and equally. The fact that Kayla was not called out for those turns in the number with Brandon, but Evan gets critiqued on his face YET AGAIN really bugs me. End rant.
So we take a break for commercials, and this is what happens on my TV when we go back to the show.

WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT FUCK????!!!??
Really Fox?!? You cut out a whole portion of the show because you were running a promo for the news?!?!? What the hell? I’m so fucking pissed you guys. Now I have to see if I can find the show with this dance intact.
Okay. Now I can see it.
They meet with Mia to learn the contemporary routine. Mia says this piece works its way from stage left to right and is a journey. Kayla compares it to the journey they’ve made in this competition, shedding layers as they’ve gone, and Jeanine says metaphorically they’re leaving stuff they’ve been through behind them.
They’re dancing to “The Four Sections: IV” by Full Orchestra Steve Reich.



That was good. The shedding of the skirts was a little distracting, in my opinion. Especially because they seemed to be having problems with them in some sections. It’s a very interesting thing with these two dancers. From a technical standpoint, Kayla inches out Jeanine, but Jeanine brings performance and connection to the piece that Kayla didn’t have for me. In fact, that is the thing that Kayla has lacked for me throughout the competition except for in a few of her pieces (like addiction). I liked this dance so much more than I liked the guys’ routine.
Adam says it was like watching the world’s longest wardrobe malfunction. He gives a shout out to MIa, saying her work is so, so special. He thinks it’s like a trifecta having the two of them working with Mia, and he can’t say enough about how much he loves them. Absolutely beautiful.
Mary thinks it was a very relevant concept. She thinks it’s another piece by Mia that is going to be well-remembered. Except for people that watch Fox in the Philly market. She thinks they are the strongest two women they have ever had in the finale.
Nigel talks a bit how it’s easier to decide who you like when you see them dancing together, and compares this routine to season three’s “Two Princes” with Danny and Neil. I loved that dance. Nigel thinks that this dance is like a modern day version of the seven veils where they take off piece after piece after piece. The routine didn’t go on long enough for him. Perv. He’s so fucking gross.
Time for Cat to sit down with Evan. Evan tells us that he wasn’t going to audition for this season, but his teacher and his brother Ryan convinced him. He talks about how tough it was that he got in and Ryan didn’t.
Cat asks him why he thinks people are getting up off the couch and voting for him. He thinks it’s because he’s something different. He’s the first Broadway dancer on the show. His favorite routine of the season was the butt dance, saying how great it was to get to work with Mia.
He is performing to “The Best Is Yet To Come” as sung by Michael Boobely.



Adam says that it was interesting because that was a variation on his audition piece. So people will either love it or think “been there, done that”. He does say Evan is unbelievable at what he does. But here’s my thing AGAIN. Yes, Adam is right; that was a variation on his audition piece. But Brandon did his audition piece as his solo last week, and didn’t get called out on it. In fact, Nigel JUST praised that very solo tonight!! This is the crap that is making me crazy tonight.
Mary says it did it for her because he is unique and he has brought a new style to the show. She says he’s excited millions of young Americans about a style that could have been lost. I think that’s a little dramatic, but partially true. I think he’s probably inspired some people to go back and watch Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire, etc. “Kudos on you, Evan.” ON you??? Oh, never mind.
Does Nigel think he has something special? Yep. Wanna know what that is? The awww factor. Nigel says people think he’s adorable and cute. I can feel my blood pressure rising again. He loves watching him do the Broadway style, but he hasn’t grown as much as Nigel would have liked to have seen. The crowd starts to boo him.
He goes on to say that what Evan did tonight wasn’t as strong as what Brandon or Jeanine did. Cat asks the audience if they enjoyed Evan’s solo. And they cheer, so I guess the answer is yes.
Next up will be Kayla and Evan, partnered together for a jive, choreographed by Tony and Melanie. Melanie tells us that even though the dancers are exhausted at this point, they are not going to hold back. Tony adds that there will be a lot of fast footwork, flicking, kicking, changing directions and fast paced movement going on.
They’re dancing to “T.R.O.U.B.L.E.” by Travis Tritt. What the fuck is up with that song name? What a pain in the ass to type. Lame. Also lame? Country Western Jive.



I especially enjoyed the section where Kayla humped Evan’s leg. That was not very good. At all. It felt really sloppy. Really the best part of the routine was the slow cartwheel-like lifts that they did. Bleh.
Adam gives a shout out to Tony and Melanie saying that he always thinks they do great work. Oh! Then he says he’s not sure that was a finale level routine.

I will fucking cut you Shankman
Mary interrupts to blubber something about country music and Adam knocking it. He’s not knocking country western, he tells her, but she’s not listening. She tells him millions of people love country western. He loves country western! Please make it stop!
Adam wants to talk about the dancers. Yes, please do. He thought it was a very strong showing for Evan, and loved the lift series. He thought it was good, it just wasn’t competitive for him. It wouldn’t make him want to pick up the phone and call.
Mary says millions of people will pick up the phone and call for these two because they are so well loved. That’s not really the same as picking up the phone and voting because the dance was awesome, is it? She thinks the routine and choreography were amazing.
But let’s talk about the dancing. Evan. She doesn’t think he was strong enough, especially given that he’s had jive before. The leverage, the connection that you have to have, she thinks they faked it. She also didn’t like their arm movements. “You were two dancers dancing that routine kind of in your own worlds instead of using each other for power and speed.”
Then she tells Kayla she stole the show. HUH??? Did she not just say they were both disconnected? How could they as a pair be told they totally faked it, and then she’s told she stole the show?

Please esplain
Nigel thought they both came out with guns blazing. Then. As he’s talking the crowd just starts chanting Evan’s name. Nigel is not amused.

Hee
He’s now shouting over the crowd to give his critique, saying that Evan was there for Kayla, he thought the retractions were very good. He asks Kayla where that personality has been all season. He implies that if she had had that personality all season she’d be home free. I still think her biggest downfall was the judges themselves. Will they never learn that people don’t respond well to tongue baths?
Time for Kayla’s solo and sit down with Cat. Kayla tells Cat that she first got into dancing after watching Singing In The Rain with her family; she pointed to the screen saying she wanted to do that. They also talk a little bit about her grandparents, and what a crybaby her grandpa is. Then we get to revisit the tongue bathing. YAY! I love that so much, so it’s fabulous to get to see it again.
Her favorite piece was the addiction piece, because it really hit home for people and inspired them. I really loved that piece as well. It was the first time I really thought she was emotionally connected, and Kupono was fucking amazing in it also. We’re sure to see that piece again.
She is dancing her solo to “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) by the Eurythmics.



This girl can not choreograph a solo to save her life. There’s tons and tons of stuff, and yet it feels like it has no substance. The girl has amazing technique, but that’s not the only thing that makes a great dancer.
Adam wants to talk about the season more than the solo (of course he does) because he thought the solo was fine, but didn’t really show who she is. He realizes that this competition is for America’s favorite dancer, but there have been some of the best dancers he’s ever seen in his life on this show including Travis, Will, Danny and now Kayla. WRONG!!!! And he is wrong for the reason I stated above. Travis and Danny (and Will to a lesser extent for me) had a helluva lot more going on than just strong technique. Let’s take a look.
See what I mean? I’m not saying that Kayla isn’t a good dancer, she is. But she needs to find that performance and connection to the material, to the audience that great dancers have. She doesn’t have that yet. Travis and Danny did have that. You know who has that from this season? Jeanine. It’s part of why I like her so much. Janette had it too. Kayla does not.
Mary says that simple and plainly, Kayla is gifted. She has been touched by an angel somehow.

Wasn’t us!
Cat asks Nigel hasn’t Kayla been strong since the beginning? He thinks she has. He thinks what has been difficult for her is how much they have all loved her from the beginning and how vocal they have been about it. But then what sometimes happens is that the audience doesn’t want to listen to them, they want to form their own opinion. Or maybe they think she’s safe, and that’s why they don’t vote. He says thank god she’s made it to the final four. Yeah, no thanks to you.
Time for the last routine of the evening. This time it’s Jeanine and Brandon, and they’re dancing a paso doble choreographed by Louis Van Amstel. He’s excited to be working with them. Jeanine tells us there are some crazy lifts in there and she has become well acquainted with the floor. Louis thinks that as a couple these two are amazing.
They are dancing to “Tetsujin” from The Matrix Revolutions Soundtrack. In matrix-y sort of costumes.



This is the first paso doble I’ve liked all season. WOW. They did an awesome job on this one. They get a standing ovation from the audience and judges.
Adam thinks that the reason the audience was standing and what makes a champion on this show is in the transitions, in the small parts in between. They filled out every single thing in between; they didn’t just get from one place to another, the movement never ended. He says they shredded tonight.
Mary screams. You know, I’d complain, but it’s the first one of the evening, so I think I’ll just consider myself lucky. First she gives a shout out to her very dear friend Louis Van Amstel. Saying the routine was fabulous.

Awwww, is he getting all teary eyed? So cute.
She thought they had just the right intensity. She loved their syncopated moves and promenade, and thinks that they have the strongest frame that they have seen all season. Spot on portrayal of the paso doble. And then she screams again. And again. And again. My luck ended very quickly.
And then Nigel screams in Mary’s ear causing her to scream again. Enough!! He says they really carried it off. He says Brandon is like a racehorse snorting to get out of the stall and take this woman and do things with her. And she was ready for it. And he wanted to do it to her too. UGH. YUCK.

I think I’m gonna barf
Nigel thinks that they are in the front for him this evening, edging the other two out by just a smidge. If he just jinxed them I will be so pissed off.
Cat tells us it is now over to us. After giving us their numbers one last time, the final four are out on the stage. Cat says we’ve had an amazing night here, but now she’s going to put the judges on the spot and ask them who they think is going to win.

Adam? “Brandon you tore it up tonight, Jeanine you became like this dark horse that came out of nowhere and became like a strong woman. Evan, I swear to god, you may be one of the most popular contestants this show has ever seen. And obviously I just called Kayla one of the best dancers I’ve ever seen, so I’m not going to sit here and try to call the winner on this one.”
Cat asks Mary if she’s going to be more of a man than Adam. She absolutely can not. She’s just glad it’s out of her hands. Nigel? He’s already said what he thinks, hasn’t he? He thinks Evan is a lovely, lovely lad and what ever happens tonight, there will be another Kasprzak coming in season six.

Who else thinks Ryan looks a little annoyed by that.
I actually thought that was really obnoxious. I felt like he was trying to tell people they didn’t need to worry about voting for Evan because Hey! His brother will be here in season six. Tonight is supposed to be about Evan, not Ryan. And although I don’t want Evan to win, I still thought that was rude.
He thinks Kayla is beautiful, he wishes she had brought her personality out before now, but the thinks she could have done no more than she did tonight. However, he still thinks the winner will be Brandon or Jeanine.

I hope so.
So that’s it for tonight. Tomorrow we will know for sure who the favorite dancer is. What did you think, Gasmi? I actually agree with Nigel that it should be between Brandon and Jeanine, but I’m worried about Evan’s fans especially given the fact that he seemed to get the most (only) criticism tonight. I’m sticking with what I’ve been saying for weeks. I want Jeanine to win.
I’m jumping right into the finale, so keep your eyes peeled for that one! I promise to get it up here as soon as possible. Until then….
SWAK, PottyMouth
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11 Comments
Before I read any further, I want to stop and thank you for including that amazing clip from “All That Jazz.” I’d forgotten how awesome it was. And yes, it was WAY showier. I can’t even believe that Tyce uttered those words. He’s talented and all, but to say that you’ve done something showier than Fosse is sacrilege!
Great recap!! I liked it a lot.
The show opened with, far and away, the weakest Wade Robson routine I’ve ever seen. And that includes stuff from NSync and Britney Spears videos.
Yo. The Fosse-ish number confused me. I’ve not seen the movie, I don’t know the story, and if it’s high-minded 70′s esoteric psychobabble stuff (which it appears to be, from that clip), it’s too much for my feeble brain. What I mean to say is, it’s a bit demanding of an audience that isn’t familiar. The music didn’t go with the movement, and neither was helped by the staging or costumes. And then to call it Broadway when it’s based on a movie version of Broadway… sheesh. Isn’t there enough unexplored actual Broadway left to plow through first? Or am I missing something? I didn’t really enjoy it. But I didn’t hate it, either. JMHO. Oh, and from now on, Tyce = Tasty Oreo.
Jeanine => Perfect Solo. It was stunning.
I creeped my kids out by knowing the words to Nasty Boys. It was a weird choice of song for me, if I’m being honest. Who’s that eating that nasty food? And you’re right about Miss Jackson. Her name ain’t Baby, either. And it’s all a little too Pauler Abdul/AI/Lythgoe’s former job besides, and ..just generally a time waster. I’m sorry, not a big fan of that number.
100% agreement of your assessment re: Evan. He wasn’t my favorite but his treatment each week was unfair. And I also agree that Nigel was obnoxious in calling out the Next Kasprzak. Dreadful.
If they gave a prize for grace under fire, Evan would win it hands down. The judges’ treatment of him went beyond unfair to dreadfully unprofessional. I give him high marks for maintaining a positive attitude despite the judges. I have to wonder why they picked him for the top 20 if he was so terrible.
Excellent recap as always.
Thanks for an excellent season of recaps, PottyMouth!!! Your blend of snark, love of dance, and Hugh Jackman have made for dozens of LOL moments, nods of total agreement and grunts of shared frustration.
All things being equal, I think Jeanine’s solo made the difference. She stood out in all of her partnered dances (not counting the vastly underwhelming jock/cheerleader routine), but her solo was pure perfection. I recognized the music immediately from the famous tango in Scent of a Woman, and Jeanine embodied grace, power, and pure sex appeal. Her controlled turns were an exclaimation point on a fantastic season. More than anything else, that performance gave her the ultimate edge going into the final vote!
Can wait for your recap of the finale or of season 6 starting in a month!!! YAY!!!!
Oh yeah…forgot to mention: gee thanks, Wade, for the hot pink panties peep during the 8 p.m. dance finale. I loved having to explain to my kids why that’s unacceptable, especially when it didn’t even lend anything meaningful to the dance (other than the ersatz cheerleaders being sluts and/or teases). THANKS A LOT for that.
All right, I must ask: the kid vampire photo? Was that from “30 Days of Night”? If so, I’m glad to know I wasn’t the only person to see that movie.
I agree that Evan got some short shrift. It seems to me (and my mom) that Brandon has an equally sweet face and unthreatening, boyish personality–everything they said about Evan not fitting the “nasty” bit could just as well have been said about Brandon. The real point was (as one judge said and as you said) that Brandon just outdanced Evan and hit it harder.
And I thought the judges were on crack while critiquing that weak country western jive.
I liked the paso better the second time I saw it–I think the music messed it up for me the first time for some reason, but when I watched it again, it really was phenomenal.
Great recap, PM! Gonna miss them since I’ll likely miss season 6 (gonna have baby #2 soon that’s already 6 days overdue). Thanks for your hard work and great sense of humor!
I have to echo Memememe’s sentiments. This show sells itself as family entertainment…yet the costumes and choreography get increasingly racy each season, and Nigel’s pervy comments to girls young enough to be his daughters (or in some cases nearly his granddaughters) is repulsive. The flashing of the pink ultra-bikinis was way too much.
I didn’t want Evan to win…but I had a hard time stomaching the pummeling he took from the judges.
As for the homage to Bob Fosse…Tyce, you are no Bob Fosse. All That Jazz is a definitive dance movie, and Tyce insulted it. (For those confused by the number, it is a hallucination of the choreographer – based on Fosse – during a massive heart attack. The character is saying goodbye to everyone and everything he holds dear. Fosse said after his heart attack in real life, he felt dead.) If you haven’t seen All That Jazz, rent it immediately.
PottyMouth…you have been outstanding all season. So I’m voting for you.
Thank you again for another amazing recap Pottymouth — you’ve been so awesome — I can’t believe there’s only one more left. Are you recapping ABDC and Season 6? I can’t imagine you’d have the energy for it, but if so, goody for us!
You reactions to the show were so similar to the ones I had (and it seems a lot of us had those reactions judging by the comments here).
I’m sooo sick of Nigel’s pervy old man act. It’s rude and disrespectful to the female contestants (I kept cringing for Jeanine especially, how is that supposed to make her feel, up on stage with her family and millions of strangers watching? But maybe she’s used to pervy old men in the dance world and has learned to tune it out). And what’s the message that he’s sending to all the young boys and girls out there about how women are supposed to be talked to and about?
The way the judges crapped all over Evan again was disgusting too! They started this almost from the beginning of the season — I’m not sure why, because a lot of the time I thought Evan outdanced Randi and they still crapped all over him. Yes, Evan was the weakest of the top 4, and yes I agree, Brandon or Jeanine or Kayla deserved to win based on their performances, but seriously, give it a rest. We get it. Evan gets it. On a night that should have been the last hurrah for him, he has to grin and bear through that bs. I’m so glad you noticed how lopsided the criticism was too — with Brandon recylcing his audition solo too and Mary’s weird-ass self-contradicting commentary on the jive. I thought that Evan actually did better in the jive in parts than Kayla (I thought she was kind of heavy footed, although that could have been the boots). Anyway, Evan took it like the class act that he is. But he shouldn’t have had to. And even Adam? REally, Uncle Adam? Did you have to sell your soul to Nigel like that? I’m so disappointed.
Jeanine’s solo was brilliant. Loved the paso doble. I was glad that they finally had the girls routine be something strong rather than flimsy as in past years (although I don’t think I really liked it, it was strong). I too was disappointed in Wade’s piece (that was much more Dan Karaty, except slightly less hoochie). I thought the Nasty Boys was ok but was so lopsided it wasn’t thoroughly enjoyable. And I can’t help but wonder if that wasn’t the point.
PM- great recap – I am going to miss them over the next few weeks (hope you are planning on recaping season 6).
I love the idea of the choreographers doing a dance instead of the lame singers. I would love to see more dancing by wade, and see shane sparks do something. But then I thought it might subject us to watching Tyce dance, or
Mia Micheals dance – as amazing of a choreographer as she is, I am not sure I want to see her dance a routine. I can;t help but picture her and Nigel doing the bench routine, or maybe the one where she meets he dad in heaven – I shudder at the thought.
I could not believe the bashing Evan received. It made me really sad for him and then I wanted to throw a sympathy vote his way (but living in canada and well, not really all that interested in voting, I of course didn;t). But seriously, could they be any meaner? And am I mistaken or was he the only one who did not get to dance his own style (or at least something resembling his own style). When the two girls danced side by side, they danced contemporary. When the two guys danced side by side it was pop-jazz. I may be very wrong here as I am not a dancer in any way shape or form, but is pop-jazz not a whole hell of a lot closer to Brandon’s style the Evans. If so then that put him at a real disadvantage going side by side against Brandon. And maybe they could have had Evan `randonly pick` the broadway routine instead of Brandon. I just think they kinda screwed him over and it sat wrong with me. Not that I wanted him to win becasue I don;t feel like he deserved it, but he certainly did not deserve the treatment he got.
Oh and the Nasty boys routine SUCKED!!! first off, the idea was stolen right from Mia Michael’s routine with danny and Neil. Second – weird music selection. Third you are choreographing for Evan – COME ON. There is no way he could pull off dancing to Nasty boys.
Lastly, Nigel really outdid himself with the pervy comments. I normally don’t mind the comments as I think he is trying to be humerous (like with the whole joke about the girls’ dance not going on long enought – I can handle it as it is said humerously and in inuendo), but when he was talking to Brandon and Jeanine about doing things to her, he really grossed me out.
Loved Jeanine tonight. Loved Brandon. Kayla is Kayla (and is certainl not in leagues with Travis, danny or Will IMO), and well, I ended up feeling really sorry for Evan. Imagine it must have been really heart breaking to be picked on like that on a night when he should have been celebrating. The fact that he cried when the audience started to chant his name said it all to me.
Cheers
Add one more viewer who agrees with you 100% re: the ridiculous treatment of Evan, the disgusting pervyness of Nigel, and the inappropriateness of the pink panty flash — it was a shite dance from someone whom I’ve come to expect more from.
Phenomenal recap — I too hope you’re around for next season!
Oh, and I shudder to think of how cruel and unfair the judges will be to Ryan, given their obvious dislike of Evan. God love Evan for putting up with it and being so much more mature and graceful than those “judges.”
xqzmoi: My jaw dropped when Tyce said he was going to bring the piece to a showier place!! What an idiot. I’m so glad you enjoyed the clip!
Memememe: Have you ever seen All That Jazz? It is a little bit of a trippy movie, but you should definitely rent it if you haven’t seen it. There will be a quiz later.
ash310: I couldn’t agree more. It really pissed me off. I thought Evan handled all that bullshit really well and I’m hoping we see him dancing his little heart out on Broadway someday.
slumrville: That solo was indeed stunning. I’ve liked her all season, and I was glad to see her really going after it like that.
Memememe: Yeah, my sis and I were watching with my nine year old niece, so I feel your pain on that one too!
Allison: You are correct! I’m so glad to know I’m not the only one who’s seen that movie!! Holy Shit! 6 days overdue?!? Well, more now I guess (hopefully not). We’ll miss you next season “ try to pop in every now and then; dancing is good for babies
cattyfan: You are too kind. Thanks for the explanation of the All That Jazz scene “ I just sorta threw it out there and didn’t think about that fact that it could be confusing if someone hadn’t seen it before. I love Fosse so much so Tyce irritated the fuck out of me with that number.
Lizbot: I am recapping both! The whole audition piece thing mad me crazy. Nigel praising Brandon for a recycled piece and then Adam giving Evan shit for the same thing “ such utter crap. It’s a shame because I think it really left a bad taste in a lot of people’s mouths. Not the best way to end the season.
brat: Thanks for putting the image of Nigel and Mia dancing together in my head “ I will be puking for days.
zbird: I’ll be curious to see if Ryan even makes it to the top twenty given their treatment of Evan and the fact that he stayed around much longer than they wanted him to.
You guys are awesome! Thanks for all the great comments all season, and thanks so much for reading!
SWAK, PottyMouth