So You Think You Can Dance: Don’t Blink Or You’ll Miss It!

We’re down to the top six. The time in any other season where we’d whittle away two more dancers before the final performances. This season is different. Because Fox didn’t know how to properly schedule a fall season we now have a final six. The good news is the season will be over before Christmas. The bad new is because Fox decided you might want to see a cook along show tonight we’re only getting an hour for performances. So no solos, and everyone is not dancing with everyone else.

Luckily it also means less talking from this idiot. 

Welcome! To So You Think You Can Dance (dance……….dance)!

After the opening sequence, Cat introduces us to the judges who are still Adam, Mary and Nigel. Cat tells Mary she looks dazzling, so Nigel pulls out an old pair of Granny sunglasses to further illustrate the point. What an idiot.

Luckily we have no time for their nonsense tonight and Cat moves us right into a Jason Gilkison samba performed by Kathryn and Ryan.

That was a great way to start the show. I think they both did a really good job on this number, and I liked the tribal feeling Jason added to the choreography. Did anyone else think it looked like Ryan almost dropped her on that last throw? I had a moment when I caught my breath on that one. Other than that, I really liked it.

 

What the hell???? 

Nigel thinks it’s a great start to the show and that Jason has given it the entertainment factor as well as the ballroom. Fantastic. He says he would not have believed it had someone told him that only one of them was a ballroom dancer. He thinks Kathryn was fabulous.

Mary loved Ryan in this, and apparently is in agreement with his signage as she also calls him the Italian Stallion. Blech. She also gives Kathryn kudos for her control and balance with all the small moves in the beginning. She thinks it was fantastic.

Adam thinks this show should now be called The Rise Of Kathryn. He is getting blown away by her week after week. He calls out some specific moves he enjoyed during the samba, among them the assisted rotating turn. Um, Adam? Don’t all turns rotate? If they didn’t, wouldn’t they just be posing?

 

I especially love it when you do that repeating redundant thing. 

He loves that Ryan is such a fantastic partner, and praises him on his shirtlessness. I guess it’s a wonderful thing if you happen to enjoy seeing Ryan shirtless. I do not.

Up next are Ellenore and Jakob performing a Broadway routine choreographed by Sir BitchyPants. UGH!  Why? Was Spencer Liff busy or something?

Tyce has such an obvious hard on for Jakob. It’s really distracting. Look, you all know I can’t stand Sir BitchyPants’ Broadway choreography, and this number is no exception. He tries so hard to rip off Fosse and always comes off looking like a cheap imitation.

That said, I think these two danced the hell out of the number, even if I was wishing the entire time that I could have seen what Spencer would have done with them. Ellenore has great personality on stage, and I think I would actually love to see her in a Broadway show someday. This was a mediocre number made better by the dancers performing it.

Nigel thinks that what Sir BitchyPants has done so brilliantly here is allow Ellenore to be Fosse-esque and Jakob to be Jakob-esque. I think they were that in SPITE of him, not because of him. 

Nigel says that the guys today do so much more than what could be done years ago. He thinks they are so much stronger as dancers nowadays than anyone was back then. 

I don’t know that I agree with that. Dancing isn’t just about who can kick their leg higher or do the most turns.  What they had years ago that sometimes gets lost now is the performance factor. Take a look at someone like Ben Vereen. Not only is he an amazing dancer, but he really sold it on stage. I could watch that man dance all day and never get bored.

Do you see what I mean? 

Anyway, Nigel thinks this dance showed the pair of them off wonderfully.

Mary thinks Ellenore was smoldering and sexy out there. She thinks Jakob is tremendous. Adam brings up the number from All That Jazz, “Everything Old Is New Again” saying that that is exactly what this number was. It made the Broadway style relevant, current, hip and gorgeous. Funny, I thought Broadway was still all those things without any help from my least favorite hack.

He thinks Ellenore has never looked so gorgeous and that Jakob is one of the most selfless partners they’ve ever had on the show. 

Because we have no extra time to spare on this show we’re jumping right into the next number which will be a lyrical jazz number choreographed by Sonya and performed by Russell and Asseleigh.

Is it just me or does Asseleigh look really orange tonight? Maybe it’s the white dress. Russell was great in this piece. I really love watching him dance. This is a guy that for me has the performance aspect down really well. What he lacks in technique he more than makes up for in his performance and passion.

Asseleigh wasn’t really given a lot to do here. I’m not sure if that’s because of her injury; maybe they were afraid to push her too hard. Or maybe Sonya just doesn’t like her. Who knows? What she had to do she did well, but this was really Russell’s dance with her providing backup and support to him.

Nigel and I are on the same page for once because he starts out by apologizing to Asseleigh saying that the whole routine for him was about Russell, and he couldn’t take his eyes off of him. 

He talks a little bit about how much of an inspiration Russell is to young dancers, and how great it has been to watch him grow week after week. He also says something about Russell pointing his toes whereas Legacy does not, but I swear I remember him saying something about the toe pointing to Legacy at some point as well.

 

In other words, shut up Nigel. 

Nigel says the biggest compliment he can give Asseleigh is that there was a great chemistry between her and that routine. He hopes he can say something nice about her later. 

Mary tells Asseleigh she is drop dead gorgeous tonight and thinks her passion was believable and right on. Then she gets choked up when she moves on to Russell, saying that he is special and that she has not seen someone grow in six seasons the way he has. She thinks it’s incredible to watch him dance like that tonight.

Adam thanks Sonya for this beautiful piece. He says that everything Nigel and Mary have said about Russell is true, but he does want to talk about Asseleigh’s contribution. He says she was literally like Russell’s guardian angel, and she did a beautiful job of portraying all of that. He tells Russell that he kicked that dances’ ass.

Nigel thinks the costume department has run out of money for clothes. HA HA HA. You are so not funny Nigel!

I have been praying season after season for no filler, but I do have to say that it is a little weird and rushed to have no filler at all. I’m not missing the lame questions to the dancers, but I do have to say I AM missing the rehearsal footage. I miss the choreographer’s telling us about the routines. Of course next season I’m sure I’ll be back to bitching about all the filler. Don’t feel free to remind me of this when I do.

Before we move on to the next dance Cat wants to remind us they are starting auditions for season seven in January. I can’t even think about next season right now, Cat.

 

Tell me about it! 

Up next are Ellenore and Ryan performing a Gary Stewart jazz routine.

This is not one of my favorite dances, but I think a lot of it is actually the music. I think this style is right up Ellenore’s alley and she did really well with it. Ryan? Not so much. 

Nigel didn’t like it. He thinks it was devoid of emotion and there wasn’t anything for him to get a hold of. To him it became a technical exercise, so he found himself nitpicking at the technique instead of just enjoying it. Uh, you DID know what kind of choreography Gary Stewart does before you hired him, right Nigel? 

Mary loved it because it was so different and unique. She found herself really getting into it. Adam agrees with both of them, saying that he thinks Ellenore was like Gary’s muse in this piece. I guess because she’s so quirky? He can’t imagine watching anyone else do that. 

He thinks Ryan was perfect in it telling him he was a great utility player in the relationship. Very well done, and sometimes you just gotta take that.

 

Where’s the Adam I used to love? Can we have him back now? Please? 

No time for questions! It’s time for the next dance! This time it’s a Jean Marc fox trot performed by Asseleigh and Jakob.

Feh. It was okay, I guess. The fox trot is not my favorite ballroom dance, but I usually like it more than this. This one was just sort of blah for me. Oh, and Jakob leaps again. In a dance style that is not known for it’s leaping. 

Nigel thinks that Asseleigh was fantastic in that. He’s so happy he has something nice to say! He says the chemistry that they have had this season has been outstanding. He also wants Jakob to stop the choreographers from giving him jetes in every single dance. That sounds like something YOU should be saying to the choreographers, Nigel. 

He doesn’t think it was the strongest routine of the night, but it certainly was worthy of being on the show. Really? How nice of you to say.

 

Dickwad 

Mary thinks Asseleigh danced this style beautifully, even though her style is more the Latin side of ballroom. She thinks Jakob keeps improving outside of his style. She thinks he still needs work once he gets into a close hold. But she is proud of him.

Adam thinks this suited Asseleigh beautifully. He talks about how a foxtrot is all about showing your partner off, and he thinks they both did that beautifully. 

Moving along, the next couple up are Ellenore and Russell dancing a paso doble by Jason Gilkison. 

Wait a minute! Shouldn’t Kathryn and Russell be next in the rotation? What are they skipping over to Ellenore and Russell? Me thinks me smells a little Nigel stink on this.

As far as the routine goes, I think they did a good job. The paso needs that fire and passion to it, and they definitely had that. Personally, I wish we had seen a tango out of these two; I think that would have been amazing. This wasn’t amazing for me, but it was very good.

Nigel and his fear of naked men want to know where the shirts are for the guys tonight? I think the costume department misunderstood his notes for more skin. He tells Russell that although he could have been sharper with his movements and had his hips thrust further forward (something about Nigel saying the words hips and thrust together makes me want to barf), he was still very good in this routine.

He thinks Ellenore was beautiful in the routine, and she gave him all the fire and passion he was lacking in her last routine,

Mary calls Ellenore a little Spanish vixen and says she thought she really fired it up out there. She tells Russell he didn’t quite have the torque or Spanish arms down, but what he was lacking there he more than made up for with his passion. She thinks he is on fire tonight.

Adam thinks it’s going to be crazy when Russell goes home and his friends say, “What was that?” I think they’ll know it was a paso Adam, since Cat was so helpful and told us all before they even danced it.

He tells Ellenore she was so extroverted in her Broadway routine and yet here she was dancing completely from within and it was magnificent and incredible to watch.

Next up are Jakob and Kathryn. They will be dancing a Dwight Rhoden and Desmond Richardson contemporary routine. 

So before I say anything about the dancing I have to address the music issue. I really don’t understand what it is with this show using covers or re-dos of songs I love into songs I can’t stand. I really love “At This Moment”, but who on the face of this planet ever thought it would be a great idea to have Michael Boobely remake it? Was it necessary? WHY?!?!?!? 

Alright, now the dancing. Incredible. They get a standing ovation from the audience AND the judges. I love Dwight and Desmond’s choreography, and Jakob and Kathryn danced it beautifully. I think I would have loved the dance even more if they had used the original song instead of Boob’s remake. I can’t help it. Music really can make or break a piece for me. But other than the music choice, I thought they were stunning.

Nigel says they just stopped the show. He then tells Kathryn that she is his favorite girl and has been for many, many weeks. What. What? What a fucking liar you are Nigel.

 

You’re totally my favorite now that Mowee’s gone and it looks like you could possibly win this whole thing. Yeah, you’ve been my favorite for like thirty six hours or so. 

I love how he now jumps on the Kathryn bandwagon. She hasn’t been his favorite for weeks. He said in an interview that it didn’t surprise him that she was in the bottom at top ten (when Noelle went out). I don’t know why it pisses me off so much that he’s lying, but it does. It’s just like last year when he tried to cram Kayla down our throats all season, and then in the finale jumped over to the Jeannine bandwagon when it became apparent that there was no way Kayla was going to win.

God, I fucking hate him.

Anyway, he says she rises to every occasion and picks up whatever is thrown at her. He would sometimes like to see more performance from her, and he’ll keep pushing her, but he thinks she is stunning. Whatever. Shut up jackass.

He thinks that Jakob now needs to grow more. He thinks he should join a company, maybe even Dwight and Desmond’s company,

 

Sounds good to us! 

where he can mix with dancers that are as equally good as he is and that will push him, because Nigel thinks he will become an incredible soloist. I actually agree with him on that one. He thinks Jakob is outstandingly brilliant.

Mary thinks that was one of the best performances she has ever seen and that it’s magical when the two of them dance. Adam says that was a game changer. He says that this country needs to be aware of how important dance is in our culture. He’s humbled by them. And he’s mad about what they just did. “I am very, very,….I’m going to actually stop talking.” 

 

Great idea since you already stopped making any sense. 

Is one contemporary routine never enough for you? Well then, you’re in luck! We have another contemporary routine. This time it’s choreographed by Travis and danced by Ryan and Asseleigh. 

WOW. I don’t like them, but that even seems a little cruel to me. I mean, I would have been pissed if they danced a Latin ballroom number together, but contemporary? Following THAT contemporary? Maybe Nigel was pissed that Asseleigh got enough votes to stay over Mowee. 

Okay, so here’s the thing about this routine……I sort of actually liked it. Even though I can’t stand either of them. Weird, huh? They had a tenderness together that really got to me here. I don’t think either of them can compare with the others from a technical standpoint, but they really did have something special in this particular performance.

God, it almost pained me to say that! It doesn’t change anything though! I still want them gone. But it does make me wonder what I would have thought of them if I had seen them perform this sooner in the season. Eeeekkk! Am I saying I might have liked them had that been the case? Noooooo. Nope. No way.

Nigel is still obsessed with men’s shirts; this time he’d like Ryan to button his. Um, Nigel? I’ve been saying that all season. Did you just notice that now? He says that a lot of people would say that both of them are in the finale because of sympathy for Asseleigh’s injury last week. Yup. Sounds about right.

 

You’re sort of an asshole, aren’t you, Nigel? 

That can’t have been too nice to hear, even if it is the truth. He thinks they’ve accounted for themselves very very well tonight. I guess they turned in all their receipts or something.

He’s not done yet. He goes on to tell Asseleigh he still thinks she has more chemistry with Jakob than she does her own husband. 

 

Forget “sort of”. You are a major asshole, Nigel. 

Mary says it’s very rare for a married couple to have a moment like this on a world stage. She thinks this is going to be a moment to remember for the pair of them.

Adam asks them how that felt, and Asseleigh says, “Perfect.” Ryan can’t respond because he’s too busy wiping away his fake tears.

 

Still no water coming out of the eyes. 

Adam says the hallmark of that number for him was to get to experience the incredible tenderness. That was worth a lot for him.

Time for the last couple of the evening. Russell and Kathryn. They will be performing a hip hop routine choreographed by Tabitha and Napoleon.

That was a great number to end the night on. It’s more hard hitting than Tabitha and Napoleon usually do, and it makes me wonder if that was in response to Shane’s comment about his piece not being lyrical hip hop.

It was a fun number and they both danced it well. Russell obviously did better than Kathryn, but I thought she held her own with him. Good job by both of them.

Nigel thinks it was great. He tells Russell it’s everything he would expect from him, and it was terrific. He can’t believe that Kathryn was as gangster as she was. He thinks that she may have stolen Russell’s heart there, but she stole his many hours weeks ago.

Mary has no idea how America is going to vote, but they definitely have her heart. And then she screams. Nigel says he prefers it when she’s crying. I hate to agree with him. But I do.

Adam says this is the absolute beauty of this show. He says that Kathryn did contemporary and samba before she threw on those jeans and tore up the dance floor. Russell did jazz and paso before he went and killed it. He thinks that was SO HOT.

And there you have it, Gasmi. Which routines were your favorites? Any you didn’t like? Were you sort of digging Asseleigh and Ryan’s routine together? Or is it just me?

I’m still at the same place I was last week. I want Ryan and Asseleigh to go out first. And any of the other four winning would make me happy, although I’m leaning toward Russell and Kathryn right now. Maybe Jakob too. And Ellenore. Hell! I don’t know! I actually like all four of them. A LOT.

As always, I’m going right into the results show, and I hope to have that up for you very, very soon. In the meantime, tell me what you thought of the performances! And no filler!

SWAK, PottyMouth