MiniCap: Survivor

Survivor

By PottyMouth | Thursday, May 10, 2012 | 12:05 pm | 20 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: MiniCaps, Recaps, Survivor

There are six castaways left and at this point everyone is trying to figure out who they want to sit next to in the finals and/or who might be thinking about trying to screw them over.  There seem to be two groups in play at the moment:  Chelsea, Sabrina, and Kim, versus Abitchia, Dr. PoopyPants, and Christina.  And Kim.  Yes, Kim is still playing both sides and worrying more and more if and when the rest of the gang is going to put two and two together.

Luckily they all seem to be a bunch of buffoons!

Chelsea tries to rope Christina into her confidence, telling her that if she wins reward she will totally take her on it.  Christina says she’ll take Chelsea if she wins (which they both know she won’t).  Seems like Chelsea made some headway with her.  Until they get back to camp and Christina blabs to the PoopyPants’ alliance about said convo.

Can you believe she was actually trying to be my friend?  I’d much rather get shit on by YOU, Abitchia!

The reward challenge involves a lot of spinning and then a giant decoder ring that will provide numbers for a combination that then releases a flag.  I’m a little dizzy just thinking about it!  Chelsea wins (woo!) and get to go hang out on a yacht for the day (and sleep over), take a shower, eat, and sleep on a real bed.  She can take two people with her and she tells Jeff she really wants to be fair in her choices.  So she chooses Sabrina (who hasn’t been no a reward in a while) and Kim.

What the fuck?!?!?!?

That’s right, Gasmi.  Chelsea not only decided NOT to take Christina after telling her she would (ALWAYS a really dumb move), BUT she also picked Kim to go who’s been on what seems like every fucking reward (not that her skinny ass looks like it).  What a stupid move!!

The aftermath of her dumb move is predictable back at camp and know the PoopyPants Brigade wants to vote her out next.  To be fair, her name was already out there, but now they’re REALLY gunning for her.  In fact, Tarzan says that if Kim comes back and suggests holding off on the Chelsea vote, well, they’ll know she’s not really with them and they should vote HER ass out! 

Kim is a little smarter than that though and does a Jedi mind trick on Abitchia, making her think Tarzan is gunning for her (and Kim as well!).  So.  Will Abitchia stick to her guns and go with the Chelsea vote, or does she really buy into the story that Tarzan is out to fuck them all over?

Come back in a couple of days and we’ll talk turkey about immunity and fishbone puzzles, the dangers of wearing women’s panties (or bikini bottoms) on your head, and analyze JUST HOW FUCKING BITTER that jury looks!  Damn!

See you there!

SWAK, PottyMouth

 

PottyMouth

When she isn't screaming curses at various dance show judges or washing her OWN mouth out with soap, PottyMouth is a proud mama to a gorgeous little boy. And yes, she knows everyone says that about their kids, but it's true when she says it. YES IT IS. Fuck you. She also laments throwing away the chance to be a trophy wife, and would like to find a rich husband so she can sit on her ass all day long and watch TV. If you are fabulously wealthy, look like Hugh Jackman (or ARE in fact Hugh Jackman), and are turned on by foul-mouthed, mature, slightly smooshy women, then she just may be the gal for you. Please send picture, references and your latest bank statement for review.

20 Comments

  1. 1
    Mister_Dangerous
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 12:19 pm

    I liked it when Mike gave PoopyPants “the finger.” Straight men will hold a grudge against a woman when she gets the best of them [that's why there's so much violence against women] so I think it was smart of the ladies to send Poopy to the jury.

    Uh, I noticed that KAT was calling her best friends ‘bitches” too so maybe that bitter grudge thing isn’t restricted only to men.

  2. 2
    featherhead
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    Oh Kat, I hope that Ponderosa is funny and exciting! I couldn’t tell with that puss on your face!

  3. 3
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    I’m getting an overwhelming urge to put a panty on my head.

  4. 4
    msjacqmills
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    I have the urge to get my lip waxed.

  5. 5
    featherhead
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 2:29 pm

    I ain’t scared of no microbes!

  6. 6
    featherhead
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 2:31 pm

    I think Albitcha ‘s boobs were fighting again, so she decided to seperate them…

  7. 7
    itchy itchy
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 3:05 pm

    I found it kind of touching that Kat cried a bit at the indignity of Tarzan wearing her panties on his head. What an ass. Tarzan, I mean.

    And yet one more reason to like Chelsea: When she wins, she thanks the puzzle wheel, not the sky. Too bad she seems too honest to win the game.

    I don’t think not taking Christina was a dumb move though — since Christina’s such an idiot, it doesn’t really matter. And as Chelsea pointed out, Christina broke her confidence, so she couldn’t really expect to be taken on the reward.

  8. 8
    carol
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 3:55 pm

    I realize that they need to think about who they want to sit in the final three with but shouldn’t they also be thinking about who is powerful enough to win the immunity challenges? Don’t you want to get ride of people that could get to the final three just because they are winning the ICs?

    The sad thing about this jury is that no matter how bitter they look during tribal, you know the final tribal will be dull because they will only make statements about themselves instead of asking questions that cause drama.

    Why is there still only one clip of Kat at Ponderosa? There are two clips already for this week. I am guessing the people that go to Ponderosa gain all the weight back rather quickly. All they are doing is sitting around eating HUGE meals, snacking and not doing any physical activity.

    Can MiniCaps have a spoiler time limit? So after, say 48 hours after it is posted, spoilers are then allowed in the comments?

  9. 9
    wow
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    Agreed Itchy, if Christina has forgiven Alicia enough to be ok with losing to her in the finals, I think she’ll get over Chelsea not taking her on a reward. And if she doesn’t…well it doesn’t really matter anyway!

  10. 10
    itchy itchy
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    As long as you don’t give away the name in the first couple of sentences (because that’s what shows up in the sidebar), it’s not a problem. The show has already aired, so it’s not really a spoiler anymore. It’s up to people to avoid spoiling it for themselves. It’s easy enough to avoid reading the minicap until you’re caught up.

    It’s a lot different when someone spoils something BEFORE the show has aired.

  11. 11
    crankyguy crankyguy
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    Why is there still only one clip of Kat at Ponderosa?

    What would be the point of more clips? The first clip is always the ride, the weighing, and the greeting. Then the next one or two clips show them getting their first shower, and just hanging around eating, and ending with the ride back to the next TC. In Kat’s case, there was nothing that could be shown in extra clips that would have rivaled her bawling all through Clip #1.

  12. 12
    hot cawfee
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 4:48 pm

    RE: the jury– dunno if I finally got a shower, liquor, clean clothes, alcohol, a real bed, beer, cawfee (reeaaalllll cawfee) and a cold pinot grigio in a oint glass, I ‘d be looking happier. Maybe that’s ’cause I am a glass half full kinda gal.
    Kat is still steaming–she may snap at the final tribal.
    I still think Christina is harmless–not playing any kind of game and safe to take to final two. They should have kept Tarzan until either Kim or Chelsea got voted off.

  13. 13
    lindaw205
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    There’s two ponderosa clips about Kat it’s just the second one is mislabled “The Ponderosa Gym”. Not much to see, though. What could possibly top her TC?

  14. 14
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 5:32 pm

    I kind of wish Tarzan, Alicia, and Christina had banded together and formed an alliance of the three most unlikable castaways and let the jury decide. From a viewer’s point of view, it would have been extremely dramatic since the jury wouldn’t want anyone to win and all their bitterness would spew. I think that they should add another wrinkle to Survivor end game; members of the jury have the option to not vote for any of the final contestants. It would add such complexity to the game, but I guess no one would ever win.

  15. 15
    Clair Clair
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    Speaking of Ponderosa, I couldn’t believe Tarzan waited until the next morning to take his shower. Ewww! Now his bedding is going to smell like his jungle self, and from the other peep’s reactions, it wasn’t good.

  16. 16
    Robin Robinez
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    “All they are doing is sitting around eating HUGE meals, snacking and not doing any physical activity.”

    They have been doing that ever since they arrived at the Island. It is what they do. :)

    Our TVGasm Fantasy Survivor Tribe is #65 out of #298. We also have 3 folks in our tribe that are in the Top #100. We have a really good chance of getting into the top this week. Wish Us Luck, Please.

    I have so much to say about this episode. I think I will hold back for what I know will be a bombdiggity full Recap that will get the juices flowing.

    TC, Robin

  17. 17
    ChaCha
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 9:37 pm

    This season’s Ponderosa (same as last season’s) is a pit compared to some of the resort-like places the Ponderosa has been in the past. This jury was robbed!!! No wonder they just sit around an eat…there’s nothing else to do. As for Kat’s single Ponderosa clip (as compared to the guys having at least two, if not three clips), well, can any of us say with complete objectivity that she is interesting enough to deserve more? I can’t.

  18. 18
    BellicoseBaby
    Posted May 10, 2012 at 10:53 pm

    I think Troyzan is the biggest bitter Betty of them all, sitting in the jury groaning and rolling his eyes. He comes across as such a misogynist – I expected more from a “swimsuit photographer.”

    What a dope.

  19. 19
    wtf
    Posted May 11, 2012 at 6:34 pm

    ithink i may have killed tarzan

  20. 20
    Robin Robinez
    Posted May 11, 2012 at 7:12 pm

    I sent a message to Our FS Tribe a couple days ago. Some didn’t get it so I am posting it here in hopes that folks will see it.

    In your final picks; the person who wins is always your immunity pick.

    In episode 15, the Question is always “Who will mention a Jury Members Name’? This is kind of a trick question. This does not just apply during Tribal Council. It applies to the whole episode. As you can see, it doesn’t say TC in the question. Folks have been fooled by this before. Just a Heads Up.

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