TVgasm Survivor Preview – Your Chance to Win

This week, CBS and Mark Burnett bring us the tenth installment of the venerable Survivor with new episodes starting February 17th. While the show hasn’t exactly blown us away since Pearl Islands or Amazon, the series was one of the main inspirations for TVgasm. In that grand tradition, we bring you our season preview. It’s where we read some simply background information people and then summarize everything about their entire history in a few paragraphs. We also want to give our readers a chance to win some excellent swag, so we are going to once again offer a prize for the person who can best predict the final three Survivor contestants.

Rules of the contest plus our season preview to get you started after the jump.

PS Yes, we know that CBS has their own Survior Fantasy League, and we encourage everybody to play. But since the leagues are only limited to eight teams, their won’t be a TVgasm reader league like for the Real World/Road Rules Challenge.

TVgasm Survior Contest Rules:

1. Go to the Survivor: Palau homepage, and review the contestants.

2. Choose the three people you think will finish one, two, and three overall.

3. E-mail your answers to survivor@tvgasm.com.

The winner, to be announced at the end of the season, will be the person who gets the three final players, and the overall winner of Survivor: Palau correct. In the event that more than one person gets the correct answers, the tiebreaker will be who picked the second and third place teams correctly as well. If more than one person has all three correct, the person who e-mailed their answers first will be awarded the winner. As always, the winner gets one free item from the TVgasm store. We aren’t a radio station, so if you have won something in the last 30 days, you can still participate in this challenge.

Only one entry per person/e-mail address will be accepted, and TVgasm will never give away your name or e-mail to anybody. We will accept entries until 8PM Eastern on Thursday, February 16th. Any questions or comments survivor@tvgasm.com. We STRONGLY encourage lots of trash talk in the forums.

Now for the contestants:

	Coby Archa – Coby is a bad boy that we rarely see on reality television. When he was 17 he was sent to jail for robbery and served five years probation. They say that prison changes a man, and that is no different with Coby. Coby saved himself from a life of crime by enrolling in beauty school. Now, I am not one to speculate, but he owns a hair salon with his female best friend as is active in his local theater. His favorite music is Madonna. Yes, prison really does change a man. As much as I would like to make fun of him, Coby does like The Apprentice, The Amazing Race, The Sims, and bocce ball. That is not a bad resume. He fits the profile of somebody who will slide under the radar and go far.
	Ashlee Ashby – Here we have the Stormin’ Mormon of the group. Now I know there are always jokes about how Mormons are boring and don’t do anything exciting, but please take a look at Ashee’s favorites. She loves orange juice – with PULP. THAT’S CRAZY. And the most memorable part about Braveheart is that Mel Gibson wears a skirt. I am getting flush just thinking about it. She has her degree, but lists her occupation as student. That means she is probably a model they found somewhere in LA.
	Gregg Carey – Hoping to add a little excitement, it looks like the producers went for the upscae Boston Robb, Boston Gregg. While I am not sure I can place him in Masshole status before even seeing him on TV, I will say that the probability is high. Gregg went to UPenn which means it must have killed him to have not made it into Harvard. He can’t be all that bad though, because he does like Lucky Charms. If Gregg makes it to the merge, he will be a contender.
	Bobby Jon Drinkard – Here is a dirty little secret. When a reality show can’t find enough interesting participants, they fallback plan is to find a struggling actor/model in Los Angeles. That is the story of Bobby Jon Drinkard, who obviously has given up his acting/modeling aspirations by appearing on a reality show. As much as it seems like he sucks, I have to say the producers didn’t do a horrible job; Bobby Jon likes Jodie Foster, The Dukes of Hazzard, and Platoon. And anybody who has the guts to name the Champagne of Beers as their favorite alcoholic drink deserves something.
	Katie Gallagher – Something has to be said about a person that leaves California and goes to school in New Jersey, but what you would say is that they are an idiot. If there is anybody I would pick from this cast to make an “impromptu” sex video and then sell it on the internet, it is Katie, who must be looking for something more exciting than staying at home with her cat.
	Caryn Groedel – Nothing says sassy, feminist lawyer more than a Caesar cut on an woman in her forties. She’s married, but gave birth to three daughters and no sons. Ami Cusack would love her, but I don’t see her making it to the merge.
	Angie Jakusz – Every season must feature somebody who is just a little farther out there than the rest of us. So long Nakomis, we now have Angie. As much as she has tried to differentiate herself from the rest of her generation, she has ended up like so many other people her age, i.e. working at a bar and living with her boyfriend. Don’t lat the tats fool you, it’s probably just a phase until she moves to Wabash and settles down with a CPA.
	Jolanda Jones – Another woman about forty years old with a really short haircut. Hmm, I wonder if she is a lawyer. Of course she is. I really have to hold back the snark from Jolanda though, since her father committed suicide when she was 13 months old, fought back from an abusive relationship to make it to the olympic trials, only to have to withdraw because her brother was murdered. Oh, and her niece died of SIDS. Unfortunately for her, community activist types usually don’t travel far on Survivor since they ruffle too many feathers on their way through the competition.
	Stephenie LaGrossa – Uh, what is the producer’s fascination with graduates of Monmouth? Stephenie is a hottie, but seems just a little too perfect. She has dated the same guy for six years, which obviously means she is going to dump him once her stint on Survivor gets her some publicity. She is clearly way too high maintenance to make it very far on the show.
	Jonathan Libby – OK, I am a heartless bastard, but even I don’t have the balls to make jokes about a person who was diagnosed and cured of testicular cancer before he turned 23. And white boy spent two years learning how to make sushi, so you have to say something about that.
	Jennifer Lyon – One thing this girl has going for her is that she was born in February. Other than that, there is not much to say. It’s a surprise to say that she wasn’t able to leverage her degree in nutrition and food management into some sort of gainful employment. She says she is a nanny, but it sounds like another day job for a struggling actress. I think I am beginning to see a pattern.
	James Miller – This guy says he is a steelworker from Alabama, but his looks sort of says "Ukranian pole vault champion". James spent a couple of years in the Navy and studied bilogical sciences in college. He continues the trend of construction workers picked to be on the show. Although he doesn’t list it on his profile, he must be a founding member of the Kevin Costner fan club, because there is no other reason for this guy to say that Waterworld was his favorite movie. It loathes me to say anything bad about a person who loves Dr. Pepper, but this guy has "early exit" written all over him.
	Kimberly Mullen – Let me see. Degree in international studies (concentration on the Middle East), with minors in psychology and political science. After graduating, she works for a defense contractor. Add it all up, and you have a person that seems groomed to be in the CIA or NSA. Want to increase ratings of Alias? Insert this former model and Miss USA pageant contestant in place of Jennifer Garner. She’s hot and very fit, but most importantly she seems very savvy. If she avoids any beef jerky scandals, she will easily make the merge.
	Ibrehem Rahman – A casting challenge from CBS -Find a buff black guy that will make everybody forget how sucky Osten was when he gave up on the game. I am trying to find something original about Ibrehem, but looks like he is just another in the long line of people who sort of went to school, sort of did some modeling and acting, and just happened to end up on a reality show. Assuming that he can make it to the merge, Ibrehem is a person who can do a lot of damage.
	Ian Rosenberger – Every reality show hast to cast somebody who is so nice it just makes you sick. Enter Ian, who not only works as a dolphin trainer, but spent his spare time helping disabled children and raising money to fight cancer instead of gettting drunk, stoned or chasing coeds. Unfortunately, these types of people just aren’t selfish enough to make it at this game. Pick this guy to come out on top of an AIDS walk, not Survivor.
	Wanda Shirk – When it comes to dealing with people, Wanda has lots of experience. She has two kids of her own, but has also been a foster parent to 25 children and exchange students as well. Wanda also seems to be very used to outdoor living and hard work, being a regular backpacker, full-time teacher, and an EMT. I believe she has the potential to be a leader of a tribe without having too much of an ego, so look for her to go far. She also has a Twila-like character that is sure to make her a fan favorite.
	Williard Smith – Having contracted rheumatic fever as a child, he had to spend several years in a wheelchair. While this adversity would have been enough for most of us to sit around and feel sorry for themselves, Willard got healthy and joined the Marines when he was only 17 and survived a couple tours of duty in Vietnam. After leaving the service, he became a lawyer and now has a private practice near Seattle. There is really nothing more to say about him other than I wonder how long he and Ed Bradley have shared the same style coordinators.
	Janu Tornell – I really hate to be critical of anybody who tries hard to get a college degree, but has to postpone finishing because of the realities of life. However, Janu is Cuban and took twenty years to finish a degree in Spanish, making me believe she might be the first person in the history of Survivor who may not finish because of lack of attention span. I usually say that people who are models aren’t well suited to this show, but Janu has displayed a willingness to work hard and seems to like the outdoors. The other contestants aon Palau might underestimate her when she tells them she was a showgirl, and that might work to her advantage.
	Tom Westman – I think Tom’s success in this game is going to depend largely upon how the tribes are split at the beginning. As a firefighter, Tom is used to being part of a team that must work together or people die. He probably isn’t going to take a lot of shit for people, and you know that he isn’t going to back down from any sort of confrontation. He’ll take a leadership position, but get picked off quickly after a merge.
	Jeff Wilson – I am going to give this guy a little break because he was born in February, and we all know February birthdays are the best. That being said, this guy doesn’t have much on his resume. In a field filled with people who have fought cancer, had their relatives shot to death, and have spent their time helping the less fortunate, a young personal trainer whol lives near Los Angeles screams "last minute alternate candidate". I am sure everybody on Palau will be sick of him in no time.