Teen Mom Dual Premier Episode: Minicap

Teen Mom

By Sugarbush | Thursday, June 14, 2012 | 12:01 am | 17 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Recaps, Teen Mom

The final season of Teen Mom vanilla has kicked off.  I know you’re all dealing with depression and grief over such a loss, but please bear with me. 

Nothing has changed in the lives of Farrah, Maci, Amber, and Catelynn. 

Farrah is still an ungrateful, slack-jawed bitch.

Mom, why don’t you just hand me the keys to your car and fuck off.

Catelynn is still really nice yet insecure.

Holy crap, are the cameras on already?

And Maci is still incapable of having a genuine emotion. 

Gawd, I’m so friggin’ pissed right now.  Or maybe I’m really happy.  Whatever.

In this super-duper, double-fisted night of Teen Mom, Amber and her entourage try to pretend that she’s going to rehab for her anger and not drugs or drinking.  Not saying she doesn’t have anger problems, but their attempts at covering up her drug problem are as good as Deena Cortese’s attempts at covering her crotch.

At this point, don’t you ruin each other’s night by being nice?

Farrah is still moving to Ft. Lauderdale and, at first, is still planning to leave Sophia behind.  Of course, we know better than that.  Farrah will never be happy as long as her mother is happy.  We also get gratuitous shots of Farrah pretending to mourn the death of her baby daddy.

Maci is still with Kyle, but the seams holding that relationship together are pulled pretty taut.  Ryan, Maci, and Kyle are all jobless, as usual.  But, for some reason, there’s a huge push to get Bentley into daycare.

Catelynn and Tyler continue their never-ending storyline of seeing and not seeing Carly.  Those two are so sweet and shockingly mature despite the environment in which they were both raised, but they are really getting boring.  I watch reality TV for drama and ridiculousness – not sugary-sweet, heartwarming proof that the apple really can fall far from the tree if the tree is drunk enough or stuck in prison.

The full recap of this plus-sized episode will be up very, very soon.  Until then, you can read up on last season here.

Much love,

Sugarbush

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Sugarbush
About

Hi, there!  About me...well, let's see.  I like to think of myself as an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in a mystery.  Sometimes my personality doesn't even reconcile in my own head.  I'm a really caring and sensitive person, but I have a dark, dry, sarcastic sense of humor which tends gives the impression that I have no soul.  I am married to a great guy who shares my sense of humor and we have a son who, both fortunately and unfortunately, has his mother's personality.   I'm an independent contractor who works from home and keeps the kid all day, everyday.  I've loved to write my whole life and have big, never-to-be-achieved dreams of one day writing a book.  My favorite past time is laughing, which is what brought me to this site.  I can laugh at almost anything, so beware.

17 Comments

  1. 1
    Lurker
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 1:16 am

    I almost forgot how big of a bitch Farrah is! Ugh. She annoys me. He attitude could use an adjustment. I read so many comments from people who think that that she has grown the most and has really matured … but I just don’t see it! Also, it seemed that Amber was strung out on something … that conversation with her cousin (?) was pretty incoherent. Looking forward to the recap! Can’t wait to see what other people think as well!

  2. 2
    Moli Moli
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 5:12 am

    OMG, what the hell is wrong with Amber. She goes to Gary with her speech already memorized and Gary chopped that. Then she goes into pity party mode after a few glasses of(I can ‘finally’ drink cause I’m 21) wine, that she opened and poured like a champ. She was basically Jenelle 2.0, whaaaaa whaaaa I have a substance abuse problem and I’m so stressed out I need to abuse a substance.

    These are my favorite kids, I love that they are all talking and my little guy Bentley I just want to eat up. Why are all these 2 years olds still sucking on pacifiers?

  3. 3
    Toad
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 7:26 am

    So happy that catelyn and tyler are still doing well!! They are the only non- train wreck on this show!

    Whyyy is macy living with Kyle?? Didn’t they wind up breaking up?? That must have been hard for Bentley cause he seems to really be attached to Kyle

    Amber…hot mess. I feel bad for Leah but it seems Gary is doing well raising her. Him and Amber need to stop entertaining the idea of being together…not good for each other

  4. 4
    April
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 10:12 am

    I just watched the first episode. I think Maci is full of shit. Okay I said it. I live in Chattanooga. She has made zero attempt to get involved with other mothers Bentley’s age. She drags him around to hang out with her girl pals at trendy restaurants in town and stuff, but she does not have any friends for that little boy his own age. At his birthday last year they showed, there was not one kid there. Just her friends and their family. No wonder Bentley does not want to go be around other kids at daycare or preschool. I hope for his sake she gets over having to drag him around to hang out with friends and she gets more involved with other mothers and he can have friends he sees regularly. When my twins were born at 10 months I had their first playdate and they have had them regularly since. They always play well with other kids. Chattanooga is a great city full of Moms groups and playgrounds and children’s museums and zoos and she just does not go to those places with him like other moms do. If she does take him she brings Kyle or a friend and they just play with him instead of letting other kids play with him and talking to other mothers. It bugs me. Like she is too good for that or something.

    I feel like a wizard because we all know what happens with Amber’s rehab. LOL she leaves early and get arrested and thrown in jail for a long time. I can see the future!

    I thought that swing would break when they Gary sat down on it. LOL!

  5. 5
    April
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 10:14 am

    ps I heart Tyler! He has such a good heart and is such a sweet boy turning into a man.

  6. 6
    April
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 10:15 am

    pps I also heart Brandon and Teresa. They have been very sweet about trying to keep communication between them and Carly open. They sound like amazing parents and I am just happy for all of them.

  7. 7
    wow
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 10:58 am

    My heart breaks for Catelynn and Tyler. On their episode of 16 and Pregnant, I remember being so happy for them and believing they did the right thing as far as the adoption, which they did. But who could have predicted the show would blow up, have a spin off and they would end up in a situation where they can afford to live on their own. I know if it was me, it’d be so hard to watch the other teens keep their kids and not get stuck on what could have been. They appear to do a somewhat good job on focusing on the positive (graduating, going on to college) but adoption in and of itself seems very difficult and their situation even more so. I wish them the absolute best and hope they make the most out of the lives they are able to live b/c they don’t have a baby to take care of.

  8. 8
    Moli Moli
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 11:39 am

    April, no Brandon and Teresa DID NOT in any way want to have an open adoption. MTV kinda put them between a rock and a hard place. Once this season is over the communication we see will end.

  9. 9
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 12:10 pm

    That would be so sad Moli. I sure hope that’s not the case.

  10. 10
    April
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    I hope that is not the case too. I think it could very much benefit Carly to know that her birth parents love her and that they did not just give her away and never thought about her again. That they in fact loved her SO much they wanted her to have a better life and gave her that. And that they still love her and miss her and think about her. I think that is beneficial to her. Catelynn and Tyler are good about respecting boundaries so I don’t see why they would cut off contact.

    Now keeping Butch and April away is a must from Carly. That is a different story.

    I watched the second episode and Maci is at it again. Ryan called it with the fact that she lectures other girls on not getting pregnant, but then she is still shacking up with a guy she is not married to and having sex. Kinda hypocritical. At least now she is on birth control I assume. She had no business asking Ryan what his business is and why he could not pick up Bentley early. She tries to control Ryan and she needs to back up on that. I heard he does have a girlfriend because my friend lives near the girlfriend. Maci probably can’t stand that.

    Maci is almost co dependent on Bentley making him ask Kyle to come back when they fight. Not wanting to drop him off at daycare. I don’t get it.

    Farrah’s parents REALLY are trying this season. I feel for them. Her mother has been crazy in the past but she is trying really hard and is kinda a funny crazy now so I like her. Michael is trying very hard. I wish she would let up on them and realize how lucky she is to have such support. She will learn once she is on her own. I felt bad for poor Michael having to load all that stuff while Farrah just stood there. LOL! I was afraid he was going to keel over.

    Farrah is lying to herself to think that there won’t be an adjustment period. Sophia is going to miss her grandparents that she is super attached to. She is going to have only strangers to sit for her now and it is going to be an adjustment. I hope it works out.

  11. 11
    Moli Moli
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    Michael made me cry when he told Farrah he understand and supported her decision….then proceeded to cry…my heart tore wide open. Sophia is definitely going to miss her support system, but I also understand Farrah SHOULD raise her daughter.

  12. 12
    Melanie
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 2:26 pm

    Did anyone else catch that Amber magically turned 21, but Leah is just 2 years old? That doesn’t make sense; it would mean that Amber had Leah at 19?
    I feel bad for Farrah’s situation – babby daddy died, crazy ass mother – but her attitude just makes me hate her. Poor Michael.
    Maci continues to always think she’s right. I agree April, it was not her business what Ryan was doing. She has no right to order and command him around. She acts like she’s so much better than him, but I just don’t see it. She doesn’t have a job either and she hasn’t finished college. Hmmm…
    I wonder why we only saw snapshots of Carly’s visit?

  13. 13
    April
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 3:24 pm

    I think Maci was better at first. I did side with her a lot at first when Ryan would be out all night and she was home alone with Bentley. I sided with her. But Ryan got a change of heart at some point and wanted to be a better Dad. Good for him. Now he is a good Dad and Maci just can’t deal with everything not being all about her. She really can’t complain about Ryan anymore, but she tries to find any little reason to do so and it just makes her look bitchy because she no longer has a good reason to complain about him. Now I am more on Ryan’s side. Maci thinks she is some kind of famous person now getting a boob job and meeting celebrities and having money. She needs to try to just live a regular life.

    She can still be friends with her young friends, but she also needs to get some mom friends and hang with them some too. She even one time on the show made a joke to one of her friends like “What am I supposed to do hang out with moms at the playground?” Um yes Maci that is exactly what you are supposed to do! Bentley does not care about trendy restaurants!

  14. 14
    OhSnap
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    I am confused. Is this the last season of this show? What happened to Teen Mom 3?

  15. 15
    Chicken Lips
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 6:00 pm

    So I’m watching right now (I haven’t read the mini or the comments – so this could be a repeat but I don’t want to spoil any surprises), and Amber just said she wanted a glass of wine to keep her mind off the fact that she’s going to rehab in a week and a half. Umm…keep it up and you’ll be going to a different kind of rehab soon. That line just struck me as incredibly funny, incredibly pathetic and just sad all at once.

  16. 16
    Chicken Lips
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 9:12 pm

    I’ll save my comments for the Fullcap (if I remember), but I will say this – if I was Michael or Michael’s Wife (what’s her name?), my foot would be so far up Farrah’s ass the water on my knee would quench her thirst. And then I’d kill her. And then I’d be ashamed that I raised such a monster.

  17. 17
    Tiera
    Posted June 14, 2012 at 10:42 pm

    @Melanie, Amber was 18 when she had Leah. Amber just turned 22 last month and Leah will be 4 in November.

    @OhSnap This is the final season of the original Teen Mom cast. Teen Mom 3 is currently being filmed and does not have a premier date yet. Teen Mom 2 will most likely air its 3rd season when this season of Teen Mom ends in the Fall and then Teen Mom 3 will probably start after that next spring.

    I read somewhere else that Brandon and Theresa no longer want anything to do with MTV. That is why the visit with Carly could not be filmed, it was only shown in photos. Apparently they do not want any new pictures of Carly shown to the public. That includes this season of Teen Mom as well as Catelynn and Tyler’s twitter and fan pages. I must say I completely agree with that decision. She is going to be starting school soon and she is the only child of this show that has a shot at a completely normal life. The older she gets the less likely it is people will recognize her from her baby pictures and the public does not know her last name either.

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