Brent to Fat: You’re Fired!

22 Comments

1. 1
   Lizardqueen
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:43 pm

   Who wants to be the first asshole to rag on my boy for misspelling muumuu?

   That’s what I thought.

   Don’t worry EdHill, it’s just ‘cuz I’m also a groupie for Zippy the Pinhead. And I’m so OVER the grammar gestapo and punctuation police. I might just misspeel on porpoise. Jest a littul bit.

2. 2
   jash
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:45 pm

   OMG this post isnt a hoax and his diet is FOR REAL.

   OMG OMG OMG i cannot believe he actually posted this. haha, funniest this this week (so far).

   thanks!

3. 3
   stacyrocks
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:48 pm

   How inspiring. Maintaining 300lbs has got to be hard to do. So it’s all about 4 bagels a day, drowning in margarine and served as a bagel tower.

4. 4
   BigMax
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:49 pm

   Warning: Diet contains absolutely no natural vitamins (except the alternate “fast” diet with a glass of orange juice). Diet may cause rickets, scurvy, beri-beri, sweatiness and pastiness (pastyness? whatever).

5. 5
   EdHill
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:52 pm

   LQ, I alrady fixed it. Thanks. ALthough it makes me think twice that you know the exact spelling of muumuu…

   BigMax, are you trying to tell me that chicken fingers, cheese fries, pizza, ice cream sundaes and cake have no nutritional value?

   Why don’t you leave the diet information to the experts…

6. 6
   BigMax
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:56 pm

   EdHill — you are right. They have nutritional value, but not particularly vitamins. I’ll live the likely date of death of someone who follows this diet to the experts (I predict you’d live less than 10 years)

7. 7
   BigMax
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 1:58 pm

   Man, this diet has me so excited that there are typos all over the place.

   Truth is I ate this diet (close enough, anyway) for a long time. It got me kind of fat, and gout. Fortunately, I’m no longer fat (the BigMax is because I’m 6’5″)

8. 8
   stacyrocks
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 2:17 pm

   I hope what I said in #3 won’t offend anyone who is or was over 300lbs and trying actively to lose the weight. If you’re going it the 4 bagel & cake way… I’m not so sorry.

9. 9
   BigTeebo
   Posted March 28, 2006 at 2:19 pm

   Part of Brent’s routine is exercise. And in that exercise routine, is yelling at other candidates. That has to burn some calories.

10. 10
    jenny10girl
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 2:34 pm

    From a chic who goes to the gym every morning at 5AM and tries to eat healthy most the time, I am truly frightened by that web page…

11. 11
    BrugaCMH
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 4:39 pm

    So is sg-dub actually mandissa pre-mystic tan?

12. 12
    ATCmurph
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 5:06 pm

    I can’t even begin to name the many things wrong with this guy. It rarely happens, but I’m at a loss for words. I just hope nobody takes his advice and follows this “diet.” Although, I must say, I’m rather fond of the part where you eat lots of pizza, chicken fingers and fries.

13. 13
    TinkerbellAPixie
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 5:18 pm

    Ed, I wouldn’t worry about LQ’s muumuu – afterall “If you’re morbidly obese like me” <– sounds like you two have a match made in Heaven (or should I say a match made in Hardee’s?)

14. 14
    TinkerbellAPixie
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 5:23 pm

    Whoops – it cut me off before I was done. I was making some lame ass joke about how you two would be a match made in Hardee’s

15. 15
    Double L
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 5:39 pm

    Actually, I’ve tried the bagel diet before and it does work… then again, I use to call it The Poverty Diet. I worked the night shift so my diet would be eat anything I want for lunch, a bagel for Dinner and another bagel for Dinner Part 2. I did lose a good 10 pounds from that diet but then again it does help if you have no money and can’t afford to buy food too.

16. 16
    Lori MacBlogger
    Posted March 28, 2006 at 10:31 pm

    He can lose 120 pounds but can’t figure out how to get a closer shave?

17. 17
    subgenre
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 10:30 am

    EdHill – Project Runway has really made you into a more sensitive, new age guy, hasn’t it? Learning all about the fashion world and the myriad faux pas to be made at any misstep have now forced you into the world of fad dieting and eating disorders. Oh, EdHill, don’t you know that Lizardqueen and Grace will love you muumuu and all as long as you wear that muumuu fiercely and shower everyday to avoid Santino stankiness? Be strong, brother, be strong.

18. 18
    jash
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 10:57 am

    after seeing the before and after photos many times, i simply cannot see much difference.

    i mean 120lbs is huge, but why doesnt he seem drastically different?

19. 19
    Franuary
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 12:09 pm

    Jash, unless I’m looking in the wrong place, I think the photos are all “after” photos. So he may not have lost any weight at all! I think he just bought a much larger pair of pants and posed in them.

20. 20
    Donna Martin Graduates!
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 4:05 pm

    I think I once read that Sly Stallone swore by a diet whereby he followed a strict regime all week then ate whatever he wanted — “peanut butter” — either on the weekend or on Sunday.

    I’ve often wondered if that would work or not.

21. 21
    Lizardqueen
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 4:15 pm

    I prefer the Kate Moss school of sveltness. Coke, diet Coke, and Camel Lights. Never eat again. Ever.

22. 22
    Aries
    Posted March 29, 2006 at 4:48 pm

    I was skeptical about Brent’s “diet” from the first episode of The Apprentice when he was bragging about losing 115 lbs. I felt like telling him to shut up until he lost another 50 or so because he was still overweight. Then as the season progressed I felt like telling Brent to shut up anyway, with or without the 50 lbs. He is a ridiculous person and his website just validates that fact.