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Tuesday, December 6, 2005
4:48 pm
87 Comments
Going into this week’s episode of The Apprentice, a certain level of suspense hung in the air. At least for me. After all, it was the final four, and we had basically three capable people and, well, Felisha. The odds were that Randal and Rebecca would surely dominate Alla and Felisha (or A&F, as I like to call them. I’m a big Abercrombie & Fitch acronym punster), but seeing that this is The Apprentice, you never really know which team will ever win any given task. Let’s not forget when a quadruple firing turned the Excel dream team into the Excel reamed team. So would such a surprise happen again? Would Randal and Rebecca inexplicably falter, letting sweet but weak Felisha sneak into the final three?The episode began with Alla eagerly awaiting the return of her teammates up in the suite. She asked Randal and Rebecca who they thought would be coming back, but Randal simply replied, “If anybody could have any insight, it would be you.” Shut up, RANDAL! Just answer the question!
Well, Alla was soon put out of her suspense as Felisha returned all full of tears and giant-foreheaded emotion. The two surviving Capital Edgers embraced tightly, and when this Lifetime Intimate Portrait moment ended, the final four headed off to Grand Central for a celebratory dinner. The quartet chatted it up over oysters and various crustaceans from the sea, and Randal asked the table what everyone had given up to be there. Alla commented that she’s been missing her ten-month old taking his first steps. Aw, that’s sort of sad. As for Randal, “Clearly, I’ve given up time with my wife.” CLEARLY. Don’t try to one-up the baby. It just won’t happen. Baby always beats wife.
The next morning, Rhona called up on the banana dildo phone and told the teams to meet Trump at Nasdaq. Sure thing, Rhone-meister! We then cut to Trump at Nasdaq talking to various unnamed executives. “Well, I use a lot of Microsoft, and it works; so I’m very happy,” he said, apparently never having tried the new XBOX 360 (Zing! Video game dis! Hey Microsoft, maybe you should prove me wrong and send me a complimentary system. What do you think?).
Well, the teams eventually filed in, and the bad news was that Bill Rancic was filling in for George again, but the good news was that Trump was in full hyperbole mode. Actually, when you talk about Microsoft, there really isn’t such a thing as hyperbole, is there? Nevertheless, Trump told us that Bill Gates’s little company “has a value of almost $300 billion.” Wow. Incidentally, just talking about Microsoft is a THIRTY BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY!
Anyway, Trump introduced us to two charming execs, and hey, is that Cathy Moriarity? Oh wait. Never mind. That’s just Janice from Microsoft. Really got excited there for a moment. But I digress. This week’s task was to make a sixty-second promotional video for Microsoft Live Meeting, new software whose functionality we’d have hammered into our heads fifty million times by the end of the hour. Well, Felisha wanted to be Project Manager, which meant we had to sit through her and Alla saying “Are you sure?” “Yeah, I am. Unless you want it. But I really want it.” “No, I want you to have it. I just want you to be sure.” “I am sure. Are you okay with that?” “Yes, as long as it’s something that you want to do.” And so on for about ten minutes.
Eventually, Felisha assumed the throne, and then she and Alla went off to meet with their production staff. Oddly enough, they brought with them two large suitcases. Were they planning on spending the night? A little slumber party in the editing suite? Well, as soon as the two women arrived at the production offices, Alla pretty much took charge. You see, in the commercial, Felisha chose to be the actress because she claimed she was the better thespian, and as a result, she tasked Alla with being the director. “That was a tough decision because being an actress is a subordinate position to being a director,” Felisha said. “I mean, I was the Project Manager. I didn’t want someone else having all the creative control.” Um, so… be the director, not the actress.
As expected, Felisha and Alla immediately bumped heads. I mean, that’s what’ll happen when the Project Manager takes a subordinate role and then still expects to have higher authority. The two women tried to be as polite and civil as possible, reiterating that they just want to collaborate, but the power structure of this team only called for pure gridlock. And uh oh. I spy a Bill Rancic lurking in the shadows! Yes, our favorite Trump poster boy quietly observed the Capital Edge mess, but he interpreted the situation as Alla being too difficult. “It’s almost impossible for Felisha to be the leader with her in the group,” he said. Dude, Alla’s just being a director! Oh whatever. These two are destined for failure. No use in getting emotionally attached.
Over on Excel, Rebecca had stepped up to be Project Manager, and her vision for the promotional video was to show a guy flipping out as he tried to organize himself for a meeting, all while attempting to catch a plane. And just when everything seems dire and gloomy, Microsoft Live Meeting saves the day. Yay!
Unfortunately for Rebecca, she had hired an actor who wasn’t very, uh, good. I’m not sure what sort of talent agency she used to find this guy, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the company specialized in staffing for some of Cinemax’s finer late night offerings. When Rebecca told the actor to express urgency, the guy attacked the scene with the sort of quiet energy you expect from a nervous intern. “I, uh, need these like, uh, five minutes ago. So…” he said into a phone over and over again. Wait a second. Maybe this guy really is just an intern. Probably Mark Burnett’s trial by fire initiation. “You want to be an intern for me? Well, let’s see how you do ON THE APPRENTICE!!!”
Sadly, Rebecca cut this master thespian (but we didn’t get to see her fire him. Boo!) and instead had Randal step into the role. And thank goodness for that. If there’s one thing The Apprentice is always good for, it’s corporate types making fools of themselves in creative environments. This season has had a spectacular track record: the LAMBOOOORGHINI presentation, the Delicious Wishes Diary Queen song, and of course, The Rubble Man (“Freakin’!”). And so Randal stepped into the role of harried businessman and delivered his coup de grace line: “Gosh, I hate waiting for these large files!!” WELL PERFORMED! And authentic too. I mean, that’s what I always yell… when I feel like yelling a line indiscriminately to no one in particular.
ACTING!
Over at Capital Edge, Felisha and Alla attempted to film a scene on the street, but like many an E! True Hollywood Story, behind-the-scenes feuding undermined the production. You see, Felisha the actress did not like Alla’s direction. And seriously, Alla, who the hell do you think you are, giving an actress directions like… a director. Oh wait.
Sensing that Felisha wasn’t comfortable taking commands, lest it undermine her authority as a Project Manager, Alla actually offered to switch roles, but Felisha refused, saying, “I’m fine with it. I’m fine with it. You know, I’m fine with it.” Yes, we know. YOU’RE FINE WITH IT.
Oh, and for those still wondering why Alla and Felisha had toted around those big-ass suitcases, it wasn’t because of any upcoming sleepover parties. They were merely props. Anticlimactic, I know.
Anyway, poor Felisha still couldn’t deal with being a subordinate; so she told us, “Alla’s trying to steal the ship and take over the task.” Then don’t make her the director. Wow, this is really an exercise in patience on behalf of the audience. Oddly enough, when the two women retired to the editing suite that night, Felisha then said, “Alla knows what she’s doing. She’s really gonna have the direction on this. She knows what she’s doing, and she’s gonna take the lead.” Uh, I thought you said she was stealing the task. Sounds like you just gave it to her on a silver platter, PLATTER GIVER!
Unfortunately for Capital Edge, all their footage that they had shot was rendered somewhat useless when the editor told them that the script would be too long for a sixty-second presentation. Instead of reworking the script or cutting down the scenes, Alla decided to go to Plan B and make the presentation text-based. Oh Alla. Don’t let the editor scare you. You can tell a lot in sixty seconds. Just ask Randal and Rebecca. Yes, they managed to successfully pull together their little “Randal Is Late And Flustered!” commercial in sixty seconds. And just as they finished their cut, Carolyn happened to stop by to take a gander. As expected, the puffy-haired one watched with a bemused smirk on her face (so close to Carolyn hysterics, but alas, none), and later, she told us that she actually liked the video because it told a story. Carolyn LOVES stories! Of course, Rebecca didn’t know this, and when Carolyn harmlessly asked, “How long did that take you,” the Project Manager became rattled that maybe the presentation looked rushed or shoddy. Oh, relax Rebecca. You’ve got the power of Randal on your team. You’ll be fine.
Laugh, Carolyn. LAUGH!
When we came back from commercial, we finally found out this week’s big lesson (a bit late, yes?): “Family.” Yes, Trump explained that in business, it’s always important to have a warm, loving, pre-nupped fam nearby. And to illustrate this, we saw one of the most amusing Trump moments of the season: the royal ordering of take-out for Melania. “We’ll order,” Trump said into his cell phone from deep within his palatial limo. “What do you want? Chicken parmigian?” This was followed by a mild pause where we could barely here the sound of Melania’s voice chattering in Donald’s ear. Suddenly, he cooed, “Ahhhh! With meat sauce!” Oh Melania, you sassy bitch! Finally, Trump ended the call with some mushy words: “Okay, Angel. I’ll take care of it… Okay, I’ll get you some spaghetti, babe. You are so lucky to be married to me. Goodbye, honey. Bye, baby.” Question: is Melania lucky to be married to you because you’re getting her an Italian take-out feast, or is it because of the, you know, billions of dollars? I’m gonna go with the billions of dollars. But then again, one can never overlook Melania’s unhealthy obsession with a fresh loaf of garlic bread.
Okay, enough stalling. Let’s get to the fun stuff. Time for the presentations. First up was Excel, and I was more than excited. The spot began with Randal flipping out in his office, and while this was certainly amusing (I could listen to “Gosh, I hate waiting for these large files!” all day long), the best part was the tragic, somber, and overly dramatic music in the background. Yes, if Randal doesn’t get his large file soon, THERE WILL BE A HOLOCAUST!!! Anyway, Randal amusing fussed out of the office and then appeared in an empty conference room where he found Rebecca waiting. “Where is everybody? We were expecting at least forty people!” his character asked.
“I know,” Rebecca’s character replied as the music reached new levels of pathos. “Delays out of the Chicago airport. Most people didn’t even make it on the flight.”
And then the icing on the cake. Randal’s character gravely replied, “Oh my goodness.” OH THE HUMANITY!!! NO ONE MADE IT TO THE MEETING!!! THEY ALL DIED!! AND THEIR BABIES TOO!!! AND THE TITANIC SANK!! AND SO DID THE LUSITANIA!!! THE HORROR!!!
All that was missing was for Randal to yell “NOOOOOO!!!!” to the heavens above with hands outstretched and camera floating away from him.
Of course, the music became all perky and happy corporate as the presentation introduced Microsoft Live Meeting into the mix. Looks like everything will be A-OK!
Next up to present were Alla and Felisha, who took the extra step to wear matching outfits. How cute and unnecessary. Well, their video started on a lovely infomercial note as it asked the audience questions like “Always on a business trip?” I personally enjoyed when the spot asked, “Frustrated?” and then cut to Felisha tossing papers all over her office. Funny, I do the exact same thing. You know, just throw papers around. The presentation also asked if people were tired of spending all that money on business trips, and this was followed with an image of Felisha in a trench coat handing over some cash to a cabbie. Was she buying drugs or something? Sketchy!
Then suddenly the video became the world’s fastest Powerpoint demonstration as small text zoomed on and off the screen before anyone could even read two words. By the end, the execs were left with nothing to say but our old favorite euphemism: “Interesting.” Sure enough, Excel won the task hands down, and for a reward, they’d get to sail around Manhattan on a yacht.
Later that night, Alla and Felisha went out for a consolation dinner, but that basically turned into a venue for Felisha to sniffle and cry while Alla watched bored and annoyed.
“I actually look down on people who, you know, get depressed. I don’t relate to that mentality. All I can do is just sit there and laugh,” she said. Sounds like someone’s been hanging out with Toral. Oh those depressed people. They’re so cute. They’d make lovely assistants.
The next day, Randal and Rebecca (or Randecca) boarded the yacht, and oh look! Family members! The two were joined by Rebecca’s boyfriend Matt and Randal’s wife Zahara, or as I like to call her, ZATHURA! The two couples hugged and kissed and said how much they loved each other. It was very nice. Anyhoo…
Back at the suite, Felisha attempted that most futile of pre-Boardroom exercises by telling Alla that whatever goes on in the Boardroom will not be personal, just honest. Okay, whatever. Meanwhile, Alla was brimming with confidence as she told us, “I think it’ll be a lot easier on Felisha as a person to just accept the fact that she failed and just pack it up and go home.” As Trump would say, Whoa whoa! That’s a bold statement to say. Might this be misdirection??
Anyway, the ladies headed down to the Boardroom, and when Trump emerged, he said, “I know you hate to lose, Alla. You HATE to lose!” Alla HATES to lose. Oh wait, Trump already said that. Well, Trump commenced his scrutiny of Felisha, and honestly, had Alla just shut her mouth, this would have been very open and shut. But instead, Alla attacked with the sort of self-serving comments Trump and especially Carolyn hate. “She would tell me something to do, but then when I was doing it too well, she would tell me to stop being so good at it,” Alla said. Carolyn sensed that she wasn’t taking any responsibility for the loss, but Alla replied that she was, but since it was a collaborative effort, it wasn’t only on her shoulders. Ah, but then if it was a collaboration, then Alla shouldn’t be any less accountable than Felisha, Carolyn noted. Touché, Ms. Kepcher!
Eventually, the notion that Alla was just too difficult to lead became a major topic of discussion. I personally hadn’t seen any evidence of that, and Alla should have simply said her record was flawless in that department (which she did say) and that Felisha put her in a position (as director) that required her to be more of a leader than the typical subordinate. Unfortunately, Alla was all over the map and was particularly brutal to Felisha, constantly interrupting her every few words. “But you are difficult,” Trump said at one point. “I mean, let’s face it. My parents sent me to military academy. They said I was very difficult, okay? I disagreed with them, but you know, they were probably right.” And that concludes this week’s vignette from the Trump Family Discord Theatre.
Hoping to make sense of the whole mess, Trump requested to see the video presentation, and when it was over, he felt there was too much text. Felisha noted that it was Alla’s idea to chop up the video with words, causing Alla to balk, “Are you kidding me?” Well, she’s not lying.
“Felisha, shame on you!” Alla then retorted, and knowing Felisha, she’d probably feel shame.
Anyway, there was more cross-talk and Felisha tried once again to somehow explain why she was a strong leader: “Truth of the matter is when it came down to the punchline, and this was my task…” Wait. Punchline? No wonder they lost! They were doing a standup routine! Makes so much sense now.
Felisha then said that she absolutely had to be Project Manager of the task to prove herself, causing Bill Rancic to suddenly wake from his slumber and said, “I respect that though.” Thanks Bill. I respect you for respecting that.
And then once again, Alla began talking over Felisha, causing Trump to remark, “She’s [Felisha's] being so nice to you, and you’re just killing her.” Uh oh. Could the pendulum be swinging against Alla? Trump continued, “I almost think that if you would have just left her alone, she would have probably said I should fire her.” Exactly! That’s what I was thinking! Up high, Donald!
Alas, even though it looked like Alla might be going home for being too pushy and stubborn, Felisha then committed the cardinal sin: she began crying in the Boardroom. Oh, poor Felish. As she expressed how frustrated she’s been with herself, Alla interrupted AGAIN, causing Felisha to exasperatedly ask, “Why don’t you just stop?” Wow, even I felt bad at this point. It was like watching a little kid get picked on by a bully. Luckily, Trump was there to regulate as he bellowed, “ALLA! ALLA! ALLA!” (Btw, he should really bellow that every episode. ALLA!) He continued: “I mean, she’s a wonderful person. She’s a wonderful woman. You gotta stop browbeating her.”
This finally quieted Alla down, which meant The Donald could do all the browbeating for once. “Felisha, do you really beleive you’re tough enough to work in New York?”
“Yes, absolutely,” Felisha said, with tears rolling down her cheeks. This is not going to be good.
“You’re lovely. You’re smart. You have so many things going for you, but you’re not strong enough for this city. Felisha, you’re fired,” Trump said, offering up one of his sweetest terminations in quite some time. He hasn’t been this warm and fuzzy since the time last season when he became Papa Bear to a weeping Chris.
Smell ya later!
Okay, time to get this show on the road. Let’s finish this–
“SIT, ALLA!” Trump suddenly blared. Whaaa?? What’s going on?
“Alla, the fact is, you’re very, very hard to manage… You were the director of a disaster. Alla, you’re fired,” Trump said. Whoa! A mini-firing! No final three? Does this mean no corporate interviews? Oh, I loved those. And, you know, they were kind of the only real part of the interview process. Alas, that’s The Donald’s problem, not mine. All I know is that this is gonna be one awkward cab ride home.
Smell ya later, too!
As Alla and Felisha headed downstairs to the street, we then went back to the Boardroom where Trump announced, “Okay, now for something pleasant. I’m gonna go back and tell Randal and Rebecca that they’re the final two.” Whoa! Trump’s going to the suite? Yup. Sure enough, we then saw him making the slo-mo victor’s walk down the hallway and opening the front door. He’s right. This IS pleasant!
Guess who’s coming to dinner!
We’ll have to wait until next week to see Randal and Rebecca’s shocked faces. In the meantime though, we then went to the cab where Felisha said some sweet but unmemorable comments whereas Alla dropped a passive-aggressive clunker: “I can be led by the right leader. That’s all I can say.” Ouch!
What did you think? Are you happy with the Final Two?
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87 Comments
Great recap B-Side. This weeks episode is going to be great, I think Randal will take it and Rebecca will be slowed down too much by her permenatly broken foot.
they need to get rebecker a RASCAL. you know, a motorised wheelchain type thing.
i was shocked he fired alla and a little sad too–i always enjoyed her curt, stern, and characteristically eastern bloc attitude.
Wait, I thought Randal’s wife was named Zenthura.
As always B-Side, a great recap…(recapping is a THIRTY BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY!) it never gets old.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Trump fired Alla this round because after this it was out of his hands so to say. Here’s my theory….I bet his associates, colleagues, etc. advised him against hiring the ex-stripper. Although I felt she was one of the strongest…strippers I’ve ever seen!
I think Trump will hire both of them. Of course, he might end up firing both as well (Which would be par for the course).
Best final 2 eva!
Great recap.
I was surprised to see Alla leave last week. It would have been great to see her up against Randal.
I read in an interview recently, that Melania was asked if she would have married Donald if he were poor.
She quickly responded by saying. “Do you think that Donald would have married me, if I were ugly?”
anyone else notice the (male) microsoft exec get quite excited when alla and felischa came in in their doublemint-twin uniforms? quite funny.
i was praying for a shot of randall when he smiled and got all goofy looking when he was talking about hugging and kissing ZATHURA! it was level 9 on a squidward scale.
it’s all good, but where’s our martha stewart apprentice recap?
I stil can’t get over the previous week’s “Moment with trump” where he screamed at someone on the phone, and they called back. He awkwardly said “no, I hung up on you.” Best..trump..moment…ever..
Yeah that commercial went way too fast with all the text zipping by at a million miles an hour.
Is it me, and i know this is bad to say, does Felisha’s face, um, protrude in the chin department a bit? Add the 1950s-Carolyn-like hair and well, she’s not so lovely. Yeah she was a nervous wreck from the beginning.
Donald looked like he was lurching a la Frankenstein when he made his way to the suite, complete with music(which was an odd sight). Ah, I get it, HE’s going to the suite instead of the not-fired candidates. Nice variation!
So, with the double firing here, we were thankfully spared the boring “interviews” episode. Still this season we were chumped out of 4 episodes, 5 if Rebecca bowed out.
Felica was the Chris of this season. She straggled along for a record # of weeks, and cried in the boardroom, an Apprentice sin.
Now if you don’t mind, I am gonna buy a subscription to Alla’s website.
Oh and don’t forget to go to Felisha Mason’s website, where you can download a browser-choking PDF 2006 calendar. Her cheekbones spill over into April of 2007.
b-side i thought you were going to say something about the slo-mo walk of the donald towards the suite like
“watching da donald walk in slo-mo is a 50 billion dollar industry!!!”
i serioulsy had a tvgasm when i saw that part. laughing out loud like im crazy and whatnot
Wait a minute. He must of known he was going to fire two, right? In the previews he goes to the suite and tells them that “tomorrow’s going to be very difficult.” Obviously they’ve had the final task planned for a while.
^ Martha Stewart recap?! Now we know the one person out there who watched that ship sink.
heyrealitytv 4 me
*this is alexis stewert here, bleep bleep boop boop, i was actually me with that type key asking about the stewart recap, bleep bleep boop boop, mission acomplish shutting down, zhouumm.*
You’re right about the infomercial-ish look of Alla and Felisha’s video. Maybe Alla is used to late-night TV.
Great recap, as always!
Microsoft- $300 billion/year.
60 second promotional video- $10,000.
Trump taking the slo-mo walk to the suite- PRICELESS!!!
I’m rooting for Crutches.
I think he fired Alla so that he would have no problem hiring Squidward. I think Alla would have beat him in a final task hands down.
Megan- I completely agree. I think Alla bit the dust based on her stripper past. She was clearly the best candidate hands down.
Well, did anybody see Alla in Access Hollywood (or was it Entertainment Tonight?) She went back to the (topless/bottomless) Palomino Club and showed the host where she did her lap dances at $40 per. She then showed the parking lot where her old stalker cash machine moron threatened her with a stun gun and a pistol.
Recounting the events, Alla actually lost it and begun to cry! I’m not sure I buy it, I think she was acting. She should have let Felisha direct.
Great recap.
When the season started off, I was really hoping that Alla would win it, as she seemed like a hard worker, and a good person. Though as of late I was really starting to tire of her, and was hoping she would get fired. It was ever since the episode after the four person firing that I started to dislike her.
Randall isn’t amazing, but he still is pretty good. Same as Rebecca. This is one case where I’ll be happy whichever one wins, though it would be good to see a black guy become The Apprentice for once.
Personally I like having Bill Rancic sit in, though this is the last season that will be happening.
Luved the Trump walk to the suite. Classic Trumpaction. This season has been the best because of Trump, Carolyn, George, Bill & The Boardroom.
I read an interview with Trump early in the season where he said that Alla’s past as a stripper would come out in the show, did I miss that? Great recap, but what about Rebecca’s boyfriend? We need a fake back story on that clown.
I’m not sure where all the Alla love is coming from. She almost single-handedly lost the last task. She directed it and it was her idea to have the world’s fastest power point presentation. She deserved to be fired just because of her performance on the task, let alone her poor boardroom behavior. However, it will be interesting seeing Rebecca on her own. I think she’s drawn support and cover from team members, most notably Randal on that last task. I’m not sure she’s truly been exposed yet and this final task will do just that.
Does Rebecca know she’s dating John Heder, aka Napoleon Dynamite?
I was very disappointed with the fact that Alla’s stripper past did not come out in the boeardroom.
Also disappointed in you B-Side for not making any comments about Rebecca’s goofy ass boyfriend.
Go Crutches!
It drove me nuts that Randal and Rebecca had the wits to know to dress professionally (though somberly) for a business presentation, while Felicia and Alla overdressed for the club they must have been going to afterwards. Did you see that huge honkin’ jewelry case Alla was packing? YUGE! She has cheap plastic earrings in every color! Seriously, those two need fashion help.
I used to try and do Felicias bangs to my hair when i was in 6th grade, it was the cool thing to do…
hahah fuck the final four, or even the final three. i’m just glad someone called that freak of nature out on her big forehead. KUDOS!
I can’t believe Felisha took Alla down with her. Alla was the only real competition to Randal. Plus she had a sterling record.
What happened to Trump’s whole “I can’t ignore the past” attitude. Alla won at least to PM tasks. Felisha is a very fatal element. Steer clear.
I think Alla will make more money on her own..
(She’ll been quoting how many billions her company makes)
and she finally made Donald have terrible FLASHBACKS of IVANNNNNNNNNNNNAAAA!!!!!!!
….(Im scared) wait stay youre fired!!!!!!
OH THANK GOD IVANNNNA I MEAN ALLA’S GONE
Didn’t Donald walk into a closet when he was “leaving the boardroom”? He opened the door and there was a black void. Maybe he slid down a chute to get to the Suite, like Batman or Maxwell Smart.
I am so rooting for Rebecca. She is smart and professional without being a jerk like the others and has way more personality than Randal. But Trump has hired all white people so far, do any of you think that will be a factor?
I agree with sarcasma… ALLA would have won against Randall…pants-down!
Beccs98: You’re right, the giggling Squidward was the best — no wonder Spongebob likes him even when he’s cranky.
Rebecca didn’t seem to like her boyfriend much.
alla was ROBBED. But Rebecca and Randall are just the bland insignificant wet towels Trump likes to hire.
Trump likes if somebody kiss’s his ass Randal it is your opportunity do it right
Rebecca so stupid she says what you want to hear and does what you want to see
Don’t worry Alla we don’t need this American shit
See ya later, Alla-gator! Glad that dirty tramp is gone. I look forward to the total blood bath that is sure to follow between R & R. They make a good team but are sure to make better enemies!
I agree….IF not fired due to her stripper past, Alla would go ALL THE WAY.
Same as Lisa….IF not fired due to her diaper pissing, she would go ALL THE WAY.
By the way, can we have some new HOTTIES to vote on?
LOL…….. good one Ubangy! I always hated that “Cossack B*tch”
Do you notice people who hates Alla nothing worth in life cannot make money cannot do anything . Stay on your welfare and shut up
The Gimpette sucks. I can’t forgive her for her refusal to get rid of Toral when she should have. Napoleon Dynamite can do better and so can the Donald. Fire the bitch!
true #41 –
It might be me, but I fail to even notice the sentence in that string of words you posted.
Prediciton logging: Trump ends up hiring both Randal and Rebecca.
prediction: trump ends up firing everyone and names himself his own apprentice. top THAT, martha!
Russian (#36): Apparently, Alla needs this “American shit,” since she left her baby to be on the show, and was pissed when she didn’t win. And clearly you need it as well, since you’re watching and reading recaps of it.
True (#41): No, I didn’t notice that, but I did notice that you can’t speak English, and so perhaps it’s you who should shut up. Illiterates are irritating, even if they’re not on welfare.
And after you complete remedial English, perhaps you should take a community college course in logic, since your “argument” makes no sense and has no basis in fact.
Felicia looks a lot like Tanya from the Real World.
holyterror(#47):Well probably my English not so perfect like yours, but I think people deserve not to be judge by their past or their parents. Don’t you think,so? Why all this sarcasm and laugh?
I want you do something like Alla did and become very successful in foreign country.
Prove me wrong.
Whoa, where did all of the Alla fans come from? Randal and Rebecca rock. I like Alla too, but why was she on like 8 talk shows this week?
#44 – I had the same thought… I hope so!
I think Rebecca looks like Kate (Evangeline Lily) from Lost. yes?
I also agree that Trump will hire both. There is supposed to be some twist.
True (#49): You’re right, your English is not as good as mine, and all my “sarcasm and laugh” is because you made a completely asinine remark and chose to make a broad and inaccurate statement about how Americans behave.
Maybe my English and reasoning are so good because I went to graduate school at Harvard and now am curator of a priceless rare book collection at another Ivy League University. Hmmmm? Does that qualify for what you “want me do”?
You’re right — no one should be judged by their past or their parents. Then can, however, be judged for idiotic statements which they voluntarily make. How do you know where the fuck anyone works, you shrill, bitter old cunt?
I am so sour about the lack of corporate interviews… love how they weeded out the pack last year.
holyterror,
RELAX! Eveyone is entitled to their opinion. Maybe that’s the reason the rest of the world hates Americans, bc people like you are such hippocrates.
Why can’t he/she critisize America? Americans seem to have no problem critisising the rest of the world!
And his/her accent or lack of PERFECT english should really not be an issue. In fact, an embarrassingly large portion of people born and raised in the US can’t read, write or speak perfect english either! lol
Now, having said all that….I actually couldn’t stand Alla.
GO CRUTCHES!!
Hire them both! I have no one to root for because I like Randall and Rebecca! Go RXR!
Randall will win hands down. His over qualified in everything due to his education, why not add one thing to it so it can be even more padded?
Trump already has a woman he needs a black man and it just so happens that Randall has the degrees to back him up which I bet Trump can’t resist.
I too think Alla would have crushed anyone but that would have really looked bad for Trump to have a former stripper working as one of his executives. She did let her true colors out in the end. She’s harsh!!!
I haven’t seen anything that leads me to believe that Rebecca has what it takes. But she just might prove me wrong. I’m rooting for Randall.
This was a great recap- I totaly forgot how bad the music was during Randall and REbeca’s commercial.
My vote goes to Randal. Rebecca reminds me of 101 other boring girls I went to law school with. (not you guys, if any of my law school friends are reading this).
holyterror
are you done now ask your russian friends ,if you have one, to translate this — and I will see where is your fucking Harvard stands
Poshel na xyjj pidaras
Re #6,
Marrying Donald Trump is a 30 BILLION DOLLAR INDUSTRY!!
true……
Woooow !!! People here hate you just as much as they hate Alla….
As for your translation quiz… None of the major translation sites could translate your phrase:
Poshel na xyjj pidaras
So why not tell us the meaning. Bet you it is some nasty – foul phrase that a stripper might use…. like…. let say … ALLA ! ! ! !
nerd fight! nerd fight!
*retreats to play dungeons and dragons*
Not liking Alla somehow makes us bad people, or leads you to the conclusion that we will not achieve anything in life? Like what was said above “true”, it seems like your power of logic is a bit, ah, lacking.
If I was being critical, she seems a bit too set in her ways to be truly successful. At least of the two remaining candidates (Rebecca in particular), they seem to be able to at least somewhat adapt quickly.
I’m happy that these two are the final two.
I love this website!! I am LOL. The past 2 weeks have been sucky for me, so I really needed this humor!
(Sigh) “true” and “holyterror”, what a couple of tools! True is obviously an immigrant rooting for a kindred spirit. “Holyterror” is a poseur that feels academic qualifications makes him superior in every facet of life. He would do well practicing more humility. His foul outburst at the end of his post qualified him as asshole of the week. Had he (or she) stuck to a cogent, well-thought argument and stayed out of snobbish territory all would have been well and his stance would have retained credibility. Fluency in a language is not proof of natural intelligence. “True” was right on target in pointing out that, in spite of greater opportunities and far greater wealth, American children rank among the least informed in the world. Compounding our “I’m an American, dammit!” attitude, we resent immigrants that, through hard work and patience, become the true receivers of the American dream. Living in UAW country has taught me that we have become a nation of lazy paycheck grabbers that lack initiative and learn to survive on our own. And doing that is what “The Apprentice” is all about.
I think True has a great future writing Nigerian spam…
Shelley (#54) and Tony A: You’re right, everyone does have a right to their opinion, and the reason I ragged on “True” is that she insisted that anyone who doesn’t like Alla must be on wefare, and didn’t even do it coherently. She also ended her post with the admonition to shut up. This was without any provocation from anyone.
Actually, I like Alla, and very much wanted her to be in the final two. I was simply defending people who do not share True’s opinion against her silly and rash conclusion that they somehow must be on welfare. I would never have given my resume had she not dared me to “prove her wrong.” (#49)
By the way, I’m an immigrant, too.
And you’re right again, Shelley, I will take your advice and chill, and not respond to her other asinine assumption that I have no Russian friends.
where’s Phakir when you need him,
NERD FIGHT!!!
I can’t WAIT for Toral to come back on the show tonight! They’ll probably bring back Markus & Clay too, they love to bring back the “difficult” ones.
Once again, go CRUTCHES!
Tony A………… you’re a “jackass”! Where did you come up with that post?
Bhaaa…bhaaa…bhaaa…bhaaa…
Heck you sound like “Clay”…
holyterror…. stay strong…. I agree with what your post…
holy terror go go go!
this is getting worse than that big fight we had about jonnie cochran dying.
Thank you, Apprentice Wanna Be, but Shelley told me to chill, and I always do what Shelley tells me.
Anyway, “True” (she speaks the truth!) is probably too busy taping up pictures of Alla on the paper-thin walls of the gulag she inhabits to read my humble posts. Perhaps she too can one day be like Alla — a distant third runner-up on a popular reality show.
Nony Mouse, You get those Nigerian letters too?
Naaaaaaaaaa….. for True to be like Alla she has to take off her clothes and dance around a pole first. Remember Alla made her $$$ initially the good fashion way. She STRIPPED for it.
[Alla lap dance... table 19... chop chop]
Rabbi: She’d also have to be a comic staple on late-night television, and hopefully be able to do that trick some strippers can do where they bend over and shoot a ping-pong ball out of their cooter at the audience.
….cooters my new fav word now….hahha until the next thing
Maybe that’s the reason the rest of the world hates Americans, bc people like you are such hippocrates.
hippocrates? like the doctor? get bent shelley. our job as americans isn’t to get the rest of the world to love us. i don’t see the rest of the world giving a rat’s ass about what we think about them you self loathing loser.
too busy taping up pictures of Alla on the paper-thin
No my dear holyterror
I’m cleaning earth from garbage like you …. your nickname smells like “holly warâ€? or “Allah Akbarâ€?. Be very careful somebody watching you.
True (#78): Ooooo! I’m shakin’ ! Does “holly war” smell like holly? I like holly.
I didn’t know nicknames could smell — maybe that’s one of the wonderful things I’m missing by not living in Russia, scented nicknames.
Looks like you finally got some help with your capitalization. Congrats. Too bad you’re still an idiot.
holyterror: ðўÑžÃ‘šÃ°Ñ€ ööþњ ……. òѹÿõù ùþôу ÿøôð
True: I care.
holyterror: +1
D-Cook (#76): Test out Bottle-Washer and Seafood Taco while you’re at it.
Glad to oblige. Love, ‘Terror.
True (#82): Evidently, you do; and have taken the trouble to enlist someone much wittier than you to help you in your asinine efforts. Perhaps it’s the same person who finally helped you mimic some semblance of English grammar and logical relevance.
I’m ACHING to know who’s “watching me.” Really. It must be tough for you, keeping tabs on my evil activities, since you don’t know my name or where I live. But … evidently YOU HAVE SUCH POWERS. Let me run for cover against the Alla Wanna Be!
P.S. Thank you for calling me “dear” — it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, and I know that was your intention.
holyterror:-1 … ýø÷ðѡÞњ
when i said go
i meant gooooooooo
hee
OMG!!! I could not believe what happened last night! Randall is such a jerk! How would Rebecca’s success diminshed any of his?!?! I hope he fails and gets fired and Trump has to hire Rebecca to fix everything. He only hired him first for affirmative action anyway.