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Tonight on the “dramatic season finale” of The Bachelor, Ben will choose between Lindzi and Courtney, two women with whom he is “head over heels” in love. Now, I’ve never seriously dated two people at once, but I can’t imagine being in love with more than one person. I’m guessing Ben is contractually obligated to say that and he isn’t, either. Ben stares at the Matterhorn and somehow says it gives him hope, which is interesting since over roughly the last 100 years, 500 people have died trying to climb it and it is known as the deadliest Alp. Those are about the same odds I would give a successful marriage between Ben and Courtney, so he may have something there.
500 men have also died trying to climb Courtney.
Ben’s mom and sister arrive to see Ben and his ladies and give their opinions. I’m expecting them to like Lindzi and not Courtney, but maybe she will fool them, too. Ben’s sister Julie says she’s “good at reading women,” so Strike one for Courtney. Ben says his sister does not normally like the women he dates and she warns him that you have to watch out for the girl that doesn’t get along with the other girls. If only someone had said that to Ben at some point along the way.
Ben explains that Lindzi loves to rock.
Lindzi is first and is introduced as the girl who arrived on a horse. They have lunch and Lindzi is charmingly nervous and keeps dropping her fork. Barbara, Ben’s mom, asks her what the magic ingredient is in their relationship.
Lindzi and Barb toast to combining their families.
Lindzi says Ben is amazing and it all seems so easy. Julia grills Lindzi next and actually asks her about the Courtney drama. Lindzi is very diplomatic. Julia says it’s a “red flag” that Courtney didn’t get along with the other women. Lindzi says “yeah, we’re very different.” Julia says she’d be very happy if Ben chose Lindzi, and they hug. Ben is relieved that they got along and that both his mom and sister think she’d be a good fit with their family.
Lindzi is thrilled to get Julia’s blessing.
Before Ben lets his family go for the night, both Julia and Barbara are already put off by the fact that Courtney is a model.
Ben is nervous for Courtney to meet his family, but feels that the Courtney that the other women got to know is “not the real Courtney.” Courtney says she’ll “be on her best behavior,” which may or may not be the “real” Courtney. Courtney, right away says that some of the women didn’t like her “from the beginning” because she intimidated them. Julia asks Courtney about the situation and Courtney says she tried from day one to get along with the women, which we know is bullshit according to all other accounts. I don’t think Julia is buying it and I hope she tells Ben as much.
Is Julia buying what Courtney is selling?
She sits down with mom next and Courtney talks about how funny and smart Ben is. She gushes and while I know every mom likes to hear that, I’m hoping she can see through this. Courtney is “pretty confident.”
The happy family?
Julia and Ben chat and we find out that she definitely DID buy into Courtney’s nonsense. She actually uses the stupid baby voice and it bothers no one. I want to bang my head against the wall. After she leaves, the three sit and talk about the women. They think Lindzi is a lovely and accomplished person. Barbara also calls Courtney accomplished. Julia thinks Courtney is more what Ben wants and asks him to think about what his dad would say. Apparently, his dad has nothing to add because she babbles a bit and has nothing of value to say.
In a moment of confusion, Lindzi mounts Ben rather than the horse.
Ben arrives to pick Lindzi up in a horse-drawn carriage ride through town. Lindzi has never been skiing before and is excited to have her virgin ski with Ben. Their gondola stops for a private picnic and Lindzi thinks this is the best time to open up to Ben. Lindzi asks if he can see “an us” in his future and he says he can and has. Back in her hotel room, Ben tells her that she has made a great impression on him from the start and she tells him that “it will only get better.”
Lindzi and Ben smooch.
Again, vulnerability is brought up and they rehash everything. Ben wants to tell Lindzi he loves her but he can’t and “doesn’t think it’s fair” to do so anyway since he has a date with Courtney the next day. Lindzi says she has never been so sure of anything. Ben has no doubts about Lindzi, but “needs to stay open” about Courtney.
Courtney is not too worried about his connection with Lindzi. Another helicopter? For fucks sake. They fly over the Matterhorn and Ben hopes their relationship is “progressing to new heights.”
“Ooh… another helicopter.”
They grill in the snow and talk about their relationship. They sled and make snow angels. Her baby voice is oddly appropriate here. Ben says they’ve had their struggles but it’s great to be past all that. She says she feels vulnerable, too and Courtney presents Ben with a gift. I’m really hoping it’s a crazy Blakely style scrapbook.
How many women made crazy “I love Ben” scrapbooks this season? Let’s make that a regular feature, too!
It IS a scrapbook, but no issues of Cosmo or In Style gave their lives for this one. After the presentation of the scrapbook it’s suddenly awkward and we now learn they are not quite past the aforementioned “all that.”
Really? A mix CD? Am I back in high school?
Courtney brings up her defensiveness, again. Did she learn nothing from Emily’s beating of the dead horse?
Will everyone please leave that dead horse alone?
And how many times in that bell going to ring in the background?
Wow. It’s like 50 o’clock.
Ben is dealing with a lot of nerves and we see and hear about his relationships with the two women. He loves them both, describing Courtney as a little bit of a mystery and Lindzi as genuine. We get a little time with Lindzi, who cannot believe it’s finally the day she might get engaged. She’s half-excited and half-terrified. Courtney has never trusted a man before and says Ben brings out the best in her. Ben says these women are both extraordinary, but he “knows what he’s doing” and is ready to propose. Neil Lane arrives and Ben picks out the ring.
“Well, Ben… we meet again.”
The women get dressed and pick oddly similar outfits complete with capes and get into helicopters! Ben hikes up a mountain to reach the location of the final rose. The first to arrive is usually the one to whom Ben says goodbye, so we’re all on pins and needles waiting to see who that is. Lindzi gets out and the sad inevitability is upon us.
I think we all know what’s coming here.
She loves Ben and talks about how this is a moment that girls dream of their whole lives. Oh, honey. Poor sweet Lindzi pours her heart out and Ben tells her how much she is what he has looked for his entire life and that he has fallen in love with her… BUT the moments he’s had with her aren’t what he’s found with “someone else.”
And this is the moment that Lindzi’s heart breaks.
Lindzi looks like she might punch him. He says he’s sorry and she just shrugs and nods when he asks if he can walk her out. She says she’s mad at herself for not giving him what he needed and wishes him good luck with a final “if things don’t work out.” Lindzi says if he does marry Courtney he’ll look like a total fool. She tears up a little, but holds it together remarkably well.
Ben, again, says he’s confused. I’m sorry, dude, but if you’re confused, maybe you SHOULDN’T PROPOSE! Courtney arrives and oddly enough, keeps the long leather gloves on.
Courtney dressed for the opera?
How can he put a ring on your finger with those gloves? Think, Courtney. Ben tells her all about how his feelings for her have grown and he’s had amazing moments with her. Is he using the exact same speech he did with Lindzi. He tells her she is his “forever” and that he loves her. He proposes and she says yes. They proclaim that they will love each other forever, or at least until they watch the season play out.
Ben makes his decision. Winning!
Chris starts out by asking the audience to suspend their judgment of the couple and the situation, which is a little odd considering the show has done nothing but set Courtney up for the audience to hate her. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think she’s innocent here, but the producers of the show cannot even begin to pretend that they really expect anyone to “give Courtney a chance.”
These bitches are NOT going to give Courtney a chance.
Chris asks Ben how he felt about watching the show and he says that the woman that he saw on television is not the Courtney he knows. He says he did listen to the warnings from the women, but that they weren’t able to give specific examples. Ben tells Chris that they didn’t speak with Courtney for a period of time and that he did break off the engagement for a while during the airing of the show because of him seeing her behavior on the show. Chris tells us about Ben ending up in a magazine with another woman. He says the tabloid fodder were either friends or past photos and that he is “not kissing the women” in those photos, insinuating that they were doctored. He tells us that Courtney would go out and try on wedding dresses each time there was negative press, so she has probably tried on every dress that has been made.
Poor Courtney. She tried so hard to get to know the audience and they just didn’t like her for no reason whatsoever.
Now we bring Courtney out. Chris describes her as the “woman America loves to hate” and she actually gets booed. The press and the media have been “hurtful” but when pressed, she does admit to feeling responsible. Courtney talks about how happy they were before the show started airing but then all of the shit hit the fan around Valentine’s Day and Ben didn’t send a card or flowers or anything. Boo-hoo. She felt abandoned by Ben because she needed him and he wasn’t there. She’s lost trust in him. She was “reaching out” and “trying to make it work,” so it’s clearly all his fault that he had trouble dealing with discovering what a competitive and conniving bitch she was with the other women. If she’s looking for sympathy, she will not find it with this audience.
Ben may be a douchebag, but he’s not alone here.
Honestly, after watching the whole season, I do think Ben is a douchebag, but Chris seems to be gunning for him in these interviews. Chris actually says to him “when the going got tough, you split.” Ben agrees and Courtney says that she really wanted him to stand by her. But which her? I understand that you want your fiancé to stand by you, but when they are suddenly seeing a totally different side of you, how can you expect them to just deal with that? If you found out your spouse was a serial killer, are you just supposed to be okay with that? Not that I’m calling Courtney a serial killer or anything, but you know?
Ben apologizes for not standing by her and says he will never abandon her. He knows “as the man” he should have stood up for her, which is such shit. So she’s allowed her coping mechanism, but he’s not? Chris describes them as “the most controversial couple in America” and we watch the proposal again, because we didn’t just see it half an hour ago. Courtney and Ben are both emotional as they watch the proposal and Ben tears up as he talks about the moment and how everything that has happened since then has been so difficult. He still loves her, but that beautiful moment has been soiled.
Ben is sad that the special moment was ruined by “the media.”
Chris and Ben have a special moment.
Chris says that for the first time since starting this show, he didn’t know how this After the Final Rose was going to go. He presents the ring to Ben and Ben puts it on Courtney’s finger. They both think this will end with a wedding and maybe it will. At least something should come out of this disaster of a season. I’m not going to go into the JP and Ashleigh interviews, but I do have to call Ashleigh out for being all judgmental.
Ashleigh berates Ben for not standing by his woman.
JP is much more understanding and says really nice things about Ben. They say it will be a faint memory once they get past all of the “being on television” stuff. By the end of the show, Ashleigh and JP have announced that they hope to get married in the next year and Chris agreeing to get ordained and officiate the ceremony.
Well, Gasmi, thanks for sticking with me through this less-than-stellar season. I’m probably taking a little time off from recapping, but I’ll be back before you know it!