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Friday, April 13, 2007
5:45 pm
73 Comments
Actually, it just seems like the 18th Inferno. Who am I to complain though? The Inferno II was awesome, as was The Duel, so all signs point to another fantastic season of drunken debauchery from the Bunim-Murray braintrust.
Keeping with Inferno tradition, 10 drunken douchebags and 10 drunken whores have been summoned to an exotic location, to be idiots and play random games, all in the name of career development and money to pay the bills. I’m glad some things never change.
So in keeping with TVGasm Challenge premiere tradition, I was intentionally tardy turning in this recap. Wait, I lied. I actually have a real job that required my attention, unlike our sloth-like friends on The Challenges.
This season on the The Inferno 3, When you lose….
they “Saddam” you
By this point, you basically know what you are going to get out of a RW/RR Challenge premiere:
1) Plane lands on foreign soil.
2) “Ohh my, ________ is soooooooooooo beautiful. I never would have guessed.”
3) Someone will look drastically different; to the point that you start starring at their arms looking for needle tracks.
4) The new house will be bigger and better than the last, replete with all the booze you can drink, a pool, a pool table, and random, quiet nooks in the house perfect for having meaningless, unprotected sex.
5) The first night, everybody will commence the two-week bender by getting obliterated, and some unassuming newbie will be hurt, either mentally or physically, by a brash and unruly veteran.
6) Some idiot from Boston will make a fool of himself.
7) The episode will climax with a fist-fight.
8) The premiere will end with a “TO BE CONTINUED…”
So if we already know what’s going to happen, why do we keep coming back? That is the million-dollar question, and I’m not even sure that I want to know the answer. I’m just going to turn off the logic switch, and settle in for another amazing ride on the Bunim-Murry Express. As usual, it doesn’t look like they’ll disappoint.
Kicking things off, we saw a plane landing in Cape Town, South Africa. Check. I think I’m having RW/RR character overload, because I spied Susie, Abram, Jenn, Colie, Davis and Tyrie emerging from the gate. Don’t get me wrong, I love the fact they are all here, but their presence in multiple “10 spot” slots is slightly disconcerting. I think I may be coming down with a minor case of E-Colie. Susie was feeling pretty good though, and kicked off a slew of idiotic comments by stating, “Being in South Africa, it’s everything that you hear about. You can actually go to the southernmost tip of an entire continent.” I completely agree. It’s simply mind-boggling. I’ll make sure I send her a postcard when I vacation in Florida this summer.
There was no rest for the weary though, and the 20 contestants were quickly ushered into the Inferno structure, or should I say, the Inferno castle. Fog machines, scaffolds and man-made flames – oh my. Susie assumed the role of narrator again, and said “We’re traveling down into the pits of hell. This is where friends are going to be lost, and enemies are going to be made. We’re psyched.” It’s a good thing I turned off the logic switch a few minutes ago, because “psyched” is an odd choice of words to describe one’s feelings about going into the pits of hell. I know we have four Denver castmates already, but the producers really dropped the ball by not inviting Brooke to the Inferno. She would have fit in perfectly with this group of loons. Plus, if Brooke thought she was in hell at the RW Denver house, I can only imagine how she would have felt entering the Inferno dungeon. There isn’t enough Valium in the world…
Why is Danny upset?
You know how some chicks worry someone else is going to wear
the same dress to a party and wear it better?
Yeah, its kinda like that.
The rules remained the same as in previous “Infernos.” Since TJ has a way of over-complicating things, I’ll paraphrase: The group was split into two teams, “Good Guys” and “Bad Asses.” The teams will then be whittled down over the course of the show through a series of challenges and one-on-one confrontations in the “Inferno.” Whichever team wins the last challenge will split up to $400K among its remaining members. Now that wasn’t so hard TJ, was it? I’ll cut him some slack though, because TJ looked even more stoned than usual.
There was only one question that remained – Who was a “Good Guy,” and who was a “Bad Ass?” Here’s the breakdown:
Good Guys – Ace, Rachel, John, Susie, Davis, Colie, Timmy, Paula, Alton and Care
Bad Asses – CT, EV, Abram, Danny, Aneesa, Tyrie, Janelle, Kenny, Tonya and Jenn
Interesting group of people, but on paper, the “Bad Asses” look LOADED. Word of caution though, don’t underestimate Alton. He could single handedly eliminate the entire Bad Ass team. You know what, after looking at his teammates, he might have to. Since this competition appears to be a landslide in favorite of team BA, let’s spruce it up a little with some gambling. I’ll set the lines for this season.
Episodes it will take for Ace to be eliminated – Over/Under 1.5
Physical confrontations that CT will be involved in – Over/Under 4
Men that Colie will have sex with – Over/Under 5
“Infernos” won by Alton – Over/Under 6
Different hairstyles that Aneesa will sport – Over/Under 7
Challenges won by Team Bad Ass – Over/Under 8
Times Rachel compares the challenge to being in the Army – Over/Under 8.5
Men that Jenn will have sex with – Over/Under 9
Different types of steroids that Danny has in his bag – Over/Under 12
Men/Women that Tonya will have sex with – Over/Under 16 (She’s the Babe Ruth of whores)
Timmy’s age – Over/Under 56
Number of times CT and Danny will make me extremely embarrassed to be from Boston – Over/Under 17,289
Marlboro Reds that Kina will smoke while sitting on a couch wishing she was involved – Over/Under 2,356,578 (I couldn’t resist)
I’m going with the whore parlay of Colie/Jenn/Tonya, and teasing Tonya’s number down to 12, due to the news of her marriage.
After the breakdown of the teams, we were then treated to the most ridiculous theme song ever on a challenge, and that’s saying something. Colie even channeled her inner Rob Schneider and started running like a cheetah. That was hilarious on a number of different levels. You can insert your own joke here.
After the credits, the reality superstars got a chance to check out their new digs. I was half-hoping that MTV would set them up in some poor South African village, but those dreams were dashed quickly when I saw the palace they entered. If the Inferno dungeon was hell, then this place had to be heaven, because it was simply amazing. The new house even had the automated sliding doors that you see at malls, for Christ’s sake. I don’t know what the point of this was, but I like to think it was because the challenge contestants have gotten so lazy that they complained about opening and closing doors.
While everyone else was running around like a bunch of idiots, poor Timmy seemed a little perturbed. What was wrong you ask? I think after seeing all the 20-somethings running around, he finally realized that he was older than most of their parents, “Apparently I’ve been hired as a chaperone by MTV.” The sad thing is, he probably wasn’t kidding. I’ve been trying to figure out for years why they keep bringing Timmy back. He brings nothing to the table. In fact, he actually takes things off the table. Beth may be old, but at least she’s entertaining. (God forgive me.)
On the other hand, CT felt like this was his year. “Because Diem’s not here, I am definitely more focused on the game. I’m gonna be way more aggressive, and I’m gonna come out headhunting.” Literally. At least his Boston accent wasn’t bleeding from his mouth like usual.
Dressed like a Mahdahn Day Unibahmah
Cara from Road Rules was back this year. Doesn’t ring a bell? You might remember her from the alliance scandal on the Gauntlet 2, or if you’re a guy, her Playboy spread a couple of years ago. Had she finally figured out that the whole alliance thing was probably the reason she went home the last challenge? Nope. “To make it to the end, Susie and I have an alliance, is that a big surprise to anyone?” It’s a little surprising to me actually. Considering the two of them are both on the Good Guy team, and they vote for players on the OTHER team, what is the point of their little alliance? Damn it, there I go applying logic again. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Also back this year was none other than Tonya, fresh off her soft-core porn debut in “The Erotic Traveler 02: Lost in Ecstasy.” I think that last sentence speaks for itself regarding Tonya’s state of mind entering this Challenge. On second thought, maybe I don’t have to tease that number down after all.
The producers have finally gotten smart, and figured out that in order to keep the show fresh, they need to rotate the crazies so they don’t get stale. For the Inferno III we have Tonya, Abram and CT. Those poor kids that are going to be on Fresh Meat II, they are going to get stuck with Beth, Tina and Coral. Yikes.
Paula gets this Challenge started off right
by fellating new comer from Wisconsin, the invisible man.
Tonya had been trying to tame her image a little, and to the surprise of everyone, got married during the “offseason.” “No one sees me settling down, because I use to drink, have sex, do whatever I want. But now, I have recently found a man that has changed all that… Don’t get me wrong, you’re not going to take Tonya out of Tonya.” Oh, I see, now Tonya just drinks, has sex, and does whatever she wants… sometimes.
After the meet and greet with the cast, we headed to the dining room for a couple of toasts. The first person to toast was CT of all people. Shades of Spencer Pratt, anyone? In an astounding turn of events, the toast wasn’t that bad. Ironically enough, the first person he tapped glasses with after the toast was Davis. We’ll get to that in a little bit though. CT wasn’t the only one feeling toasty; Davis had a few ironic words as well, “To new friends, friends to remember, and let’s make this a night to forget.” Don’t worry Davis, you’ll want to forget this night real soon. Cheers.
This joyful dinner reminds me of another group of friends. . .
No…
That’s it!
And if memory serves, things worked out just as well for them.
After the toasts, everyone seemed to be in great spirits. Johnny Bananas was playing an African drum, Tyrie was working the maracas, and CT was choking out Kenny on the floor. Whoa, where did that come from? Well, what appeared to possibly be friendly wrestling soon turned violent when CT refused to relinquish the chokehold. After getting whipped around by CT in the house, one would think Kenny’s done with wrestling, right? Think again. Next thing you know, the two of them were shirtless on the deck going at it once more. Colie seemed to be enjoying herself though, “CT and Kenny wanted to see who has the bigger cock, and in order to prove that, I guess you have to wrestle” Somebody should tell CT and Kenny that if they wanted to prove to Colie who had the bigger cock, all they had to do is treat her like crap, and they’d be in like Flynn. Haven’t they watched the “Real World Denver”? Actually, I think they were trying to see who had the bigger “balls,” but Colie just has dick on the brain.
It never takes long for hook ups on this show…
…but I gotta say, I did not see this one coming!
The wrestling continued though, until CT had choked out Kenny again, but wound up with a bloody nose. This infuriated the drunken gladiator, so he started spewing out his usual slew of veiled threats:
“Let me bang you out real quick and we’ll find out.”
“Say I’m the man!”
“I’ll bang you right the fuck out!”
I mean seriously, these screencaps are kinda writing themselves. . .
I think I’m getting Déjà vu. Word to the wise – If you don’t like CT and you travel to Boston, stay away from the bar scene. There are a hundred CTs running around at all times. They hit on your girlfriend, pick numerous fights, and throw drinks at people, all the while spouting obscene threats in thick Boston accents. For example, I’ve heard a thousand different variations of this threat over the years while working: “What? You wanna staaaht? What are you, retaahded? I will work you, son. I will fackin’ work you, guy.”
After things seemingly had settled down in the house a little bit, chaos reigned supreme once again. You couldn’t tell exactly what happened, but through the shades on the bathroom door, you could see Davis and Johnny Bananas hugging against the wall. Don’t get any ideas; Johnny was just trying to console Davis. Apparently, Davis had just been punched in the eye. Gee, I wonder what drunken asshole did that. Bananas shed some light on the situation for us: “Davis looks at me, and he has a shiner the size of a golf ball on his face, you know? Then he said. ‘CT hit me.’ ” Shocker. What I want to know is why Johnny was so into helping Davis? He was like a soothing mother watching over her newborn. Maybe he was trying to reshape his image in the gay community after the “Real World Key West”?
After the break, Tyrie had penetrated Johnny Bananas’ protective force field around Davis, and got the 411. Apparently, CT randomly asked Davis if he could take a punch, and when Davis said “I guess,” CT clocked him.
A shot from the DAVIS FACE CAM
Tyrie was not happy when he heard the news, so he jumped into the nearest phone booth and emerged as Leroy Jenkins. This was a tame Leroy Jenkins though, because instead of screaming like a madman, he casually questioned CT about the incident while he was passed out. Unfortunately for CT, I don’t think he got off to a “wicked good staaaht” this year, because he appeared to be sleeping in the hallway. Last year, he sauntered around the house like he was Don Juan, and stumbled upon the only single bedroom in the place. This year’s sleeping arrangements appeared to be a Barca Lounger.
CT didn’t have to worry about sleepless nights for long though, because a producer appeared in the middle of the night to give him the boot. You couldn’t see it on TV, but I’m sure this guy had a fleet of security behind him with tasers, because CT went rather quietly. He may not have been swinging, but he was certainly still a bigot, saying, “All I know is there’s a gay kid who isolates himself.” Oy.
With CT gone, what would the Bad Asses do since they were down a man? We didn’t have to wonder long, because TJ suddenly appeared at the house with an announcement. Rumor had it, MTV had flown in a Bad Ass replacement for CT, and he would be there shortly. This news stunned everybody except Danny, who could barely contain the boner brought on by the news. He immediately started cooing for his partner in illegal supplement crime, “I knew it! I knew! Give us Wes! Give us Wes, baby!” Normally I would balk at the idea of Wes showing up, but after The Duel, I changed my tune about Wes a little. Plus, who would you rather have show up? Mark? Evan? Derrick? I’ll take Wes every day of the week and twice on Sunday, as opposed to those clowns. Give us Wes! Give us Wes, baby!
There wasn’t much suspense about who would show up, because mere seconds later, we saw the shadow of a man strolling up the driveway with a bag in his hand. Damn it, it was Derrick. “I really wasn’t expecting to do another Challenge, but I got a phone call that was like ‘Hey, can you drop everything and come to South Africa?’ ” Yeah sure, buddy, that’s why you showed up an hour after the fight happened. Derrick was probably so upset that he didn’t get invited, that he bought a ticket to South Africa the same week, just so he wouldn’t miss anything.
The next morning, it was finally time to start the challenges. You know, the things they are actually in South Africa for. The first one was called “Unbraided.” In a nutshell, each member of the respective teams was attached to an individual rope by a harness. The ropes were then knotted together and raised over water. The goal of the game was to get the ropes “unbraided” without falling in the water by hitting the quick-release button on their harnesses.
The first group up was the Good Guys, who wasted no time showing their team inadequacies. They got about one person loose before Colie accidentally hit her quick-release button. Instead of just owning up to it, Colie reverted back to her old tricks and started making excuses, “By some great force of nature, my quick-release harness becomes undone.” That’s what she gets for letting some guy try to go down on her during a mission. Hope was not completely lost though, because she had not actually fallen in, she merely landed on Davis’ shoulders. The freak luck didn’t last long, because another great force of nature happened, causing Davis’s harness to become undone, and they both went tumbling into the water.
The hip bones connected to the knee bone,
the nee bones connected to Brads face bone,
Brads face bones connected to Tonya Herpe bone…wait what?
It was now the Bad Asses’ turn, and if they screwed up, we got to do this dreadfully boring challenge all over again. Go Bad Asses! If they were smart, they would just take their time, and make sure that nobody fell in, no matter how long it took. Then again, that would be the logical solution, so we’ll probably be here all day.
Hell must have frozen over, because the Bad Asses actually took their time. On the coattails of common sense, they coasted to the victory. Kenny was marinating in juices of victory, and stated, “Evil will always triumph, because good is dumb.” Why don’t we get another opinion, and head up to the sky to ask what CT thinks about the good/evil paradox? “Good is wicked retahhhded.” Have a nice flight home, pal.
Back at the house, the teams headed into “trophy rooms” where they needed to deliberate over who to send from the other squad into the Inferno. The Good Guys were leaning toward Abram, because they felt like it would cut the heart out of the Bad Asses. Interesting strategy – especially when Team BA decided to pick Davis. Looks like the Good Guys will be a man down shortly. Alton was not happy about this news. I think he actually wanted to be named, “That is a really weak move on their part, especially when Abram’s coming up to me everyday since we’ve landed, saying ‘I’ll see you in there, brother.’ ” Oh snap, this is starting to get interesting. Excuse me, I need to call my bookie quickly, “Yeah, hi, can I throw a C-note down on ‘Infernos won by Alton’? I’ll take the over please.”
Alton may get his chance at Abram after all, because there is a life shield available for the winner of the next day’s challenge. If Alton wins, takes Davis’ place, and then promptly knocks Abe out, he will become my personal hero. If you haven’t been able to tell by now, I’m card-carrying member of Team Alton.
The next day, the teams arrived at some random field for the next challenge. At least this one looked a little more interesting; it appeared as if they would need to scale some makeshift buildings with ladders. The challenge was aptly named “Ladder Race.” Basically, each person had to scale a building, climb across the roof of that building, and then climb down the final building using a ladder. Team with the lowest cumulative time wins. Simple right? Well, that is unless you’re afraid of heights. Don’t look down, Tyrie!
Derek was so excited to see Danny….
…he banged him
The first pair to go was Danny and Timmy. Danny wasn’t sweating this challenge, and told us, “I do this everyday, climb up ladders, and build houses. This is nothing for me.” God, I hope he falls now. Unfortunately, Danny made it across without a hitch. Timmy on the other hand, didn’t do as well. He must have been late for the early bird special at Denny’s or something, because after he climbed the first ladder, he suddenly fell for no apparent reason. I’m chalking this one up to arthritis.
Cara and Aneesa went next, and they didn’t fare much better than Timmy. They may not have fallen, but they couldn’t even manage to lift the ladder enough to hook it on the next rung of the building, so they both just sat in the first window and waited out the 15-minute time limit. I think Johnny Bananas summed up everyone’s feelings regarding Cara’s effort, when he said, “At this point, I’m pretty sure she’s not thinking about the challenge. She’s thinking about shopping at Bloomingdales, and having a Caramel Macchiato from Starbucks.” Mmmmmm… Caramel Macchiato… To add insult to injury, not only did Cara let the time expire, but she also threw her ladder, which added a 2-minute penalty to the team. Good thing she’s got that sweet alliance to fall back on…
Play the Don Imus Game:
Can you tell which Challenger this is based soley on…umm…nevermind, I like my job
A couple of other teams went, and then Tyrie got his chance to face his fears. Just as predicted, he lasted about a minute before he “accidentally” kicked his ladder over. Oops. Better hope Abram doesn’t win the life shield, pal.
Davis then got his chance to make his case for the shield, and he actually handled the course pretty quickly. Of course, the first one to meet him at the finish line was his new best friend, Johnny B. I’m starting to sense a theme here. While David may have finished the course with a good time, I’m sorry to say that he has a snowball’s chance in hell of winning the life shield with Alton still to go. As we found out on “Gauntlet II,” Alton + Climbing = Thanks for coming.
Before Alton got his chance to tackle the course, Ace had an opportunity to prove his ineptitude on yet another challenge. At least he realizes he sucks. “I really, really want to do well in this one,” he said. “I never had a chance to really shine on any of these challenges.” MTV then reinforced Ace’s futility by showing a montage of all the different times he’s been sent home early on previous “Challenges.” Hmm, maybe MTV was trying to set us up for a triumphant moment for poor Ace? Fat chance. Ace fell off the ladder before he even got to the first window. Abram must have been going crazy standing there watching that. “Damn it, how could we have forgotten that Ace was on the Good Guys??? I would rather go into “The Inferno” with him than one of the girls on their team.”
So much for monogamy. Tonya humps the first ladder she sees.
It was now time for the last two competitors, so Alton and Abram stepped up to the starting line. I don’t think the Good Guys have a chance to win the challenge no matter how well Alton does, but I will definitely enjoy watching Abram get his ass handed to him.
They both flew up the first couple of ladders, and Abram was actually ahead. I kept waiting for Alton to make his comeback, but I guess Abe is climber as well, and he managed to hold off Alton for the victory. Is it too late to take that bet back? Alton didn’t seem too worried about the loss; he was just worried about winning the life shield so he could take out Abram in the Inferno later. Was he sandbagging to conserve his strength??? Alton did indeed win the life shield for his team, but the Bad Asses won the war, and the $10,000 check. Speaking of themes, I don’t think we’ve heard the last of that particular result this season.
Combining both competition and her OBGYN check up may have cost the Good Guys the game
The two teams then gathered in the Inferno dungeon for the showdown. What would Alton do, would he save Davis? Would Abram chicken out, and throw a teammate to the wolves? First up was Alton, and sure enough, he revealed that he was going to use the life shield to save Davis. (Pumping my fist.) Now it was on Abram. Would we have the ultimate Inferno on the first episode? Nope, Abram chickened out and used his life shield to send in Tyrie. Uh oh, if this is a test of strength, Alton may be going home.
“TO BE CONTINUED”
WTF? Oh yea, I forgot. Check.
What did you guys think about the premiere? I think this season looks EXTREMELY promising. The same guy who picked the clips for “Next time on ‘The Hills,’ ” definitely picked the clips for “This season on ‘The Challenge,’ ” because some of things I heard blew me away. Did I hear Janelle tell Bananas that she was pregnant with his kid??? We haven’t had a good pregnancy scare since Vegas. I can’t wait… Do you guys think the “Bad Asses” will run away with this Challenge, or will Danny’s roid-rage cause the team to self destruct? See you guys on the board.
TV Social
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73 Comments
Long ass recap, but so worth every hilarious paragraph! You nailed the recap world L Con! Looking forward to each recap by you!!!
Hey, L Con. I didn’t understand the recap at first. But afterwhile, I understood it. You had some good jokes. When I saw Danny say that stuff about CT, I thought that was the first ever WICKED good thing he ever did. Do you guys think CT should ever do a challenge again?
I hate CT, he’s such an assclown! Nice choice in men, Diem. I was GLAD to see him go….but then came Derrick. Eh, whatever.
Gah where was the cameraman when Davis got clocked? Doing body shots with Colie and/or Tanya?
Someone needs to be fired for that miss!
As for the season clips…..I don’t think Janelle is preg with Johnny’s baby…it was probably a scene where she was coniving to get out of going into the Inferno, so she prob just told Johnny “We’ll tell them Im pregnant with your kid” to get out of it. Which MAY be the person Jenn is talking to when she says “why should you get the benefits when you haven’t even done anything?”
Great recap!
I loooved the premiere. I am liking this challenge so much and it has to do with a the lack of Kina and her hag-friends.
Abram.. ahh I used to like him so much! Somewhere along the line he became a 100% nutcase.
As long as Jenn and Colie stay off camera (or get voted off soon) I will like this Inferno 3. I don’t mind Davis and Tyrie at all, and I’m glad to see Johnny Bananas and Janelle. Usually the newbies get irritating, but given the “veterans” MTV has picked lately (seriously, what is with all the RR Xtreme people), I cannot complain!
L Con I must say that this was a phenominal recap. It has been hard for me to adjust to the loss of B-Side but you may have restored my faith in TVgasm.
And even though I know he is a complete ass, I was a little upset to see CT go-just because he is good eye candy. I live in Boston now and I kind of secretly hope that I will run into him one day. But what is the deal with guys wrestling the first night they get to these challenges? Every challenge they do this and I just don’t get it.
Alton is unbelievable at these challenges but he looks like he is wasting away. Does anyone else think that he is becoming a lollipop head?
Hey, L Con. Great first recap. I was hoping we’d have someone good to make fun of this train wreck!
As for the lines you set for the season – I think you meant to say:
Number of times Colie will TRY to have sex, only to be rebuffed and treated with scorn: 6
Also, I thought one of the rules in the Inferno was that if you won the shield and had been chosen to go into the inferno, you had to sacrifice another member of the team. Am I wrong?
Loved the previews. Tonya is married but still a whore – who would have ever guessed?
Oh – and I hope CT never graces my TV screen again. He is the most vile creature I’ve ever seen. He’s a liability (as is Abe) to MTV and I can’t believe even they are stupid enough to keep bringing them back.
L Con, solid recap. A few points:
I’m totally in for the bets you placed. I’ll probably take the under on most of them, but that’s some solid bookie work.
Second, one of my friends is pretty good friends with Derek. She says he’s a nice guy, and he seems like it (though I haven’t met him) outside of these challenges. Didn’t he say something about re-evaluating life decisions after getting booted from the last challenge.
Anyways, keep up the good work. It’s WICKED AWESOME!
I LOVED this recap, L Con. I cannot believe you actually outdid yourself. I never thought you’d pull off a better recap than the Hills, but here it is!
I was not-so-patiently waiting for someone to recap the Inferno III. I can’t believe CT was kicked off even before the first challenge. Too bad. I would have loved to see CT and Tyrie go at it when both of them lost their cool. You know, since the have the same level heads and all.
I really think that the way these teams were chosen, the poor Good Guys were set up to lose. C’mon, Derrick, Aneesa, Abe against Timmy, Cara, Ace? Puh-leez, MTV, at least make this show less predictable. The most exciting this thing can get is if I just tune in to see how, exactly, the Good Guys lose every single challenge. Maybe they can make losing an art. Like Timmy doing a triple back flip with a twist every time he falls off something and DQs. Then his other team mates come in like Cirque d Solie (sp?) and silently pick him up and take him away in some graceful dance sequence.
I hope the hook-ups start soon and that they are a plenty to compensate for these shitty one-sided challenges. Oh, I hope Tanya and Jen get real drunk real soon. Then let them loose in the house and watch the fireworks begin.
P.S. I used to miss Abe when Wes was on Freshmeat but now, after the last RW/RR challenge and Abe’s behavior so far, I’m starting to miss Wes.
Ugh…I gotta go wash my hands now after typing that!
~UglyCutie
Hysterical recap – I literally laughed out loud no less than 5 times. The longest of said episodes occurred when I read – Tyrie jumped into the nearest phonebooth and emerged as Leroy Jenkins. That killed. Nicely done.
I dont even watch this show. Nver seen anything after the first couple of road rules. However, I laughed so hard reading your recap!!
The Davis/CT incident is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.
love,
Mr. Sniffles
One thing, L Con. You should have had a “KISS MY A**. KISS MY G*****N A**” reference. If you could have done anything that wouldn’t make us miss B-Side so much, you could have had that.
Thanks for all the nice compliments everyone. I’m glad the name change didn’t throw anyone off. I just figured if I’m going to be doing non Hills/Laguna recaps, then I should get a universal handle. You guys get the credit for the new name, since most of you donned me L-Con over on the Hills board some time ago.
Treading “ While I’ve never met Derek in real life (Spencer Pratt’s friends say he’s a great guy too,) I can say that I’ve met CT and Danny in person several times, and TV does not do either of them justice. Danny’s worse in person, it’s pretty sad when even your hometown thinks you’re a jackass.
Pegster “ Fantastic point about Colie being rebuffed and scorned. Although, I have a feeling she’s going to breakthrough on The Challenge. Half the guys on here would screw a hole in the wall. Combine that with copious amounts of booze, and an exotic setting, and all signs point to Colie busting out of her rut. Several times in fact. I envision Colie crying at a bar one night, and Alton swooping in, telling her what a great person she is, and then bedding her later that night. We’ll see.
Nerrawllehctim “ I have to save some stuff for the rest of the season! If I put it all out on the table in the first recap, it would be like having a knife at a gunfight for me writing the next 12.
Also, you’re absolutely right about Panama being part of North America. When I Googled it to verify my facts, I kept getting responses talking about an area called “The Southern Most Point” in Key West. This was probably because Panama’s keyword in Google is “Central America,” which as we all know, is not a continent. My fault.
Funny recap! Now can you recap Shear Genius? The cast of that show is nutzo to.
Do they usually air the challenges while The Real World is still in its season? It is somewhat distracting to have the Denver cast on two shows simultaneously.
I might be the only one who likes Timmy. But he does add a voice of reason to the show. And I find him the most entertaining.
If I were Davis, I would have filed charges on CT, just to prove a point. CT needs to just go away and take Wes and Derrick with him to anger management classes.
I am confused as to why they chose Janelle to be on the BAD ASS team. She seemed to be one of the most rational, sweet cast members to grace The Real World. Am I missing something?
I liked the way the teams were divided in the fist 3 seasons. Was it Road Rules vs Real World? I can’t remember.
And as for Aneesa. What is up with that rats nest on her head? Is she channeling Britney Spears and her cheap wig fixation? I started liking her last season, and felt she looked her best. Go back to the short hair Aneesa.
Nice job, L-Con! I was hoping you might be the recapper for this trainwreck of a show. The credits made me die a little inside, I think.
When CT was leaving and said, “Apparently I’m some sort of menace to society” I couldn’t help but think that when you randomly injure someone, unprovoked, that you kind of ARE a menace…a menace that looks like Cro-Magnon man. “The Inferno is so easy, a caveman could do it! Unless he gets hammered and assaults someone on the first night!” Douche.
Also, who in the blue hell is “Ev”? She was on like a half an episode of Fresh Meat and now she’s a “badass”?!
Great work … LOVED the photo captions!
L-Con!!!!!!
Awesome recap! I didn’t want it to end, then I realized you wrote SEVEN pages – so I took off my selfish enjoyment cap, and now I’ve got my THANKS FOR ANOTHER RECAP cap on! lol!
CT is a revolting animal, the bouncing around and grabbing his crotch maneuver was weird. I though for a minute that Diane Fossey had come back from the dead, and we were watching a bizarre reality show about apes run amok in the RW/RR house.
Kenny is still hot.
Danny Douche needs to go back to Dorchester, and commence beating Melinda into the submissive dishrag she has tried so hard to become.
Jenn + Tonya + Hot Tub + South Africa + HIV Infested bikini bottoms.
Personally, I’d like to see Johnny Bananas in a Johnny Banana-Hammock. Abe however, should have shaved some of CT’s troll hair off, and pasted it on that bowling ball he’s passing off as a head.
Cara and Susie have an alliance? An alliance of STUPIDITY! At least they ain’t scurred!
Anyway – Go Team L-Con!
PS – If Ev doesn’t make it to the end, then this show is rigged, because that girl is an animal!
I loved this part:
“What I want to know is why Johnny was so into helping Davis? He was like a soothing mother watching over her newborn.
After the break, Tyrie had penetrated Johnny Bananas’ protective force field around Davis, and got the 411.”
That was great. I too was wondering about Bananas’ interactions with Davis; i think he is probably really a nice guy but it did make me laugh.
Also loved the part about Danny cooing over Wes. Despite his steroid-induced bulk, can Danny really be considered a badass? Perhaps they should have named one of the teams Dickbags and he would have been a better fit for that one.
Great job on the recap – I laughed a bunch of times.
What happened to B side???? I’ve been gone for a while. Is he o.k.?
Angela LaMont,
B-Side left. Its okay though L-Con and TreadingOnMe are great.
I agree w/everyone about CT.
What a moron! Why’d he have to bring “gay” into the conversation? Nobody accused him of a “hate crime”, he voluntarily (though inadvertently) fessed up to it.
As far as Derrick goes. I think he’s probably a nice person. Reality TV tends to magnify whatever your personality is by x1000 times, and Derrick has been nothing but nice to everyone. He might be a drunk, but at least he’s a friendly drunk.
I’m depressed. I loved B side. I’m a writer and I really loved his style. I know that the other writers are great, but I just really loved him and he was the reason I read TV Gasm. Thanks for your response Shia
I think it was Rachel and not Colie that broke into a cheetah sprint.
I bet the sliding doors make it easier on the cameramen.
I actually like Timmy… but you’re right, he IS kind of likable, which makes for terrible reality TV.
I agree, TVGasm has gone a bit downhill. But I still come here, so… c’est la vie. I wouldn’t be so rude but this IS TVGasm, after all.
to Page (#16)
Janelle was a complete bitch, second only to Tyler (in my opinion) during her season. Although she is quite accomplished in the area of “Personal Relations”
I really disliked Janelle throughout the first half of Key West for bullying Svetlana. I don’t think she’s a bitch, so much as someone that is easily annoyed. Towards the end of Key West, though, Janelle developed some patience and was very nice to Svetlana (throwing her the bday part), and defended her against Tyler at the reunion show. I feel like Janelle’s made up for her nastiness.
She still belongs on the Badass team though. While I think she’s a nice person, she’s definately fiesty.
#29
LCon did address his “southern-most point of the continent” mistake.
Even B-Side made mistakes. They were pointed out in the same way #13 did. In a nice way. And the life-shield rule was also pointed out in the same manner by #7 (really they were answering #6′s question.)
I don’t get why some people don’t give LCon a chance. I thought this recap was funny. At first I must admit that most of the new recappers didn’t make me laugh out loud like the old guys but I think they are all getting really good (LCon included).
Don’t be so disresepectful to those who write these recaps…it kind of ruins it for those of us who log onto TVgasm to read the funny recaps and disrespect the participants on these shows.
It’s a reall buzz-kill when everyone’s talking about the show (love or hate it) and then posters start being really nasty to LCon or to each other. Go to chat rooms for that!!
As far as I’m concerned this site is a really fun escape from my reality. I don’t wanna come on here wanting to forget the shitty day at work or the petty arguments with the spouse and then just get shit on by a total stranger.
Let’s keep focused people! It’s US against THEM. LOL!
Love and Peace,
~UglyCutie
For someone who doesn’t have TV, you seem to have a pretty solid grasp on the rules considering I paraphrased them…
Unfortunately, when you win the life-shield, it doesn’t mean that you automatically get expelled from the “Inferno,” it just means that you have a choice to save yourself. Obviously 99.9% of the time people will take that option, but I was just hoping Abram would man up after all the trash talking he had been doing. I’m pretty sure that is why Alton stepped up and took Davis’ place, he thought Abram would stick around to try and take him out.
Sorry for any confusion.
You don’t have a T.V.? Well, in that case, I apologize. I thought most people who don’t watch the shows and just read the recaps did it out of choice. I had no idea some people didn’t have televisions.
Can I ask why? Did you just move or something?
My computer was out of comission for a few months but I still watched the shows and read the recaps on my phone, but for some reason, I couldn’t post any comments. It was torture.
To be honest, I still don’t understand all the rules of the show. I was just defending LCon. I don’t want him scared away and leaving us…I guess after B-Side I have abandonment issues.
P.S. I missed the episode on TV but I watched the whole thing on MTV Overdirve. Can’t you just watch the show there?
~UglyCutie
I’m 99.9% sure that TJ explicitly said that you HAVE to choose someone else when you have the life-shield. I recall the first time he talked about it that wasn’t clear, but at one of the later times in the show he made it clear. I don’t have the ep saved anymore, but maybe someone can double check one of the 1000000 times it’s re-shown in the next few days.
Nyrlieht, I think you may be right. I just checked it out, and TJ does use the word “have,” as does Abram before he competes in the challenge. In the past, there has been an option to use it or not, but they must have made a little change to the rules this year. Would have been nice if TJ explained that in the beggining. Thanks TJ, I blame this on you.
Team UglyCutie!
I agree, let’s get back to the basics.
I’m here to make fun of the show, and all of the poor bastards who put themsleves on it! I would LOVE to get away from the civil-war of commenting!
I’m on L-Con’s team too, but hell – I’ll even extend a peace pipe to to NYWord… What do you say NY? Peace?
Can we all agree to hate the game, and not the people that love to hate it?
^^^^ Okay, okay…this reminds me of Jessica in LB saying “don’t hate the game, hate the player”! LOL!
I miss Jessica’s retarded ass.
Yay!! Let me begin by saying the Ev scurred me when she had this evil look on her face during an interview while doing that ladder challenge.
I really hoped more controversial players like Kina, Tina, or Beth had come back. But when you cut a villains head off, another one grows. So I wonder who the HBIC might turn out to be this season?? Maybe E.Colie will be the she-devil of the Inferno this season. She has potential. I agree with someone who earlier said that having Brooke on this show would have been GOLD!
Anyone have any thoughts as to which of the girls will turn into a lunatic by the fourth episode??
~UglyCutie
Florida is not at the southernmost tip of North America
oh yeah, I forgot to mention…..I love how MTV had to blur out CT’s pubes above his low-rise jeans.
Classy!! (BARF)
and is it just me, or does it look like Ev has had lip reduction surgery?
L.CON SHOULD BE FIRED—RE: 10 D—BAGS +10 HOES–
NAW YOU AIN’T IMUS R U .
UglyCutie
Did you check out the sneak/preview for the next episode? I have the feeling Evelyn and Aneesa are going to be villains. Aneesa, now that she’s not ganged up on, isn’t quite as nice as she was on The Duel. And Evelyn… well, I don’t know exactly why all the other girls are hating, but she’s going to be cast as a villain.
…I thought Janelle had Coral potential, but then I read some comments up there and realized Coral would never make the stupid “personal relations” mistake.
IIRC, Ev was a FreshMeater from the first time they did a Fresh Meat challenge.
She was paired with Danny I think and he turned out to be a really sore loser when they got to the obstacle course / elimination station thing at the end of each episode.
According to Casey from the same Fresh Meat challenge (who used her third? place winnings to get a fine boob job), Ev (short for Evelyn?) was hitting on Casey.
In her post-race interview, Casey revealed her disgust for the situation. Not sure if that means she’s homophobic or didn’t find Ev attractive.
Did anyone catch Alton saying something about “getting to the mother-land” in the beginning montage? Yeah, like the home of apartheid is a great place for someone to note as the “motherland.” Perhaps he was speaking in terms of the continent as a whole.
Don’t know why I keep watching this… I can’t tell who is from RR or RW or is Fresh Meat.
CT needs to have his likeness printed in the dictionaries next to the word, “meathead.” This guy is the utter defintion of a meathead.
I guess not having Diem around actually killed him. He probably wouldn’t have gotten so drunk and punched Davis if Diem was around.
It is too early to tell what possible hookups might occur but between Colie and Jenn anything is possible.
Too bad about Aneesa. I thought she had really seen the error of her ways, but you’re right, she was being picked on last time so I guess that made me mellow for a bit. As for Ev, I don’t really know that much about her. But bitch can be scary (see previous post).
I really got a kick outta the person who pointed out that CT’s pubes were blurred. I noticed that too. Gross. Hasn’t he heard of “landscaping”.
During the previews before the show started I noticed Jen arguing with one of the other castmembers. Does anyone remember who it was?
I also thought Davis’ comments about CT being on the plane longer than he was in Africa hilarious.
LCOn:
Any word if anyone is going to recap the Flavor of Love Charm School show? I thought the I Love New York show was funny as hell but no one recapped it. This will be the biggest circus on TV.
~UglyCutie
One more thing I forgot to add. The way they broke down the teams was retarded. Tyrie on the Bad Asses?! Come on! Since when does getting arrested for peeing in front of your house warrant being called a bad ass? Danny on the bad asses was a bit of a stretch as well. Davis on the good guys?!
I hate to keep posting, I should have just made one big post, but is it safe to say Johnny and Janelle hooked up during this show or had already been messing around prior.
I remember they came close to messing around during the key west season. Does anyone know about this. I am asking because, why would Janelle joke with the whole being pregnant with John’s kid if they hadn’t been messing around. Anyone know about this?
Maybe they’re strategizing for sympathy passes like CANCER did.
I think Tyrie’s on the BA Team because of Leroy Jenkins. LOL!
Is it supposed to be Warren Mitchell, or Mitchell Warren? Anyway, you wanted to do the recap and didn’t get selected. Try to show some grace, and stop insulting L-Con – you are acting without courtesy or respect. The best man won, it’s time to move on.
i dont know why there’s been a change in heart about how to treat one’s fellow posters, but all i’m gonna say regarding that that while reading thru the comments for this recap, i actually agreed with 2 of my biggest non-fans. (although i think they missed me, i havent had time to check out tvgasm or even tv all last week.)
luckily i did get to watch the inferno yesterday and i really thought this recap corroborated the craziness i saw on tv. l-con, i still think you’re too wordy and you shouldnt make lists of any kind. i couldnt read the last few pages because it was too much information.
the pics were good though and there was one point i laughed out loud. i really have to put this out there guys: CT is totally gay. that “wrestling” shit was totally whack and i think the reason he punched davis was cause he wants to do him. it’s totally obvious he used diem as a beard, and he was way to into “wrestling” kenny (who is a very sexy stud in his own right.)
CT is a maniac. He has to come out of the closet. his use of the word gay when describing his attack on davis is indicative of his M.O. It’s only a matter of time before he’s forced out though. No one there seems to like him, and once he fucks diem over, the guys who defend her will really give it to CT.
I agree with shia completely about jazelle. thought she was a huge bitch to svettie, couldnt understand why she joined forces with tyler. but it seems like love may be bringing the best out of her finally. she didnt have the courage to get with JB during their season, and it seems like that pairing off is inevitable.
go team real world love…
I don’t think it’s picking on any one particular person, it just that people have been saying the same things for WEEKS since B-Side left. It’s one thing to say that a recap wasn’t that great and to offer some creative criticism. It’s another to literally go line-by-line and comment on each and every thing that wasn’t liked. It’s gotten to the point where it’s just rude, disrespectful and intentionally hurtful. Most people here have pretty thick skin but it’s hard not to get fed up when people are obviously trying to start something.
Moving on…everything’s pretty much been said so just a few quick points. CT’s an idiot, thank god he’s gone. I laughed at Davis’ plane comment too, but then got annoyed because he’s so one of those people who doesn’t talk shit about somebody until they’re out of earshot. Tyrie being a badass? Some dramatic arguments and public peeing does not a bad ass make. Did anybody else want to punch Danny in the face for being all douchey during the toast? Yeah, we all know that CT will turn into a violent asshole about five seconds after his first drink, but what’s the point in being all negative about it right now? I guess he’s just angry that he doesn’t have Melinda around to tell him how wicked awesome he is.
Damn, this season is going to be so awesome. What a great first episode. 1 neanderthal down, 1 to go.
Also, i’m so happy Johnny Bananas is on this one, he seems like such a nice guy. Not to mention smokin’ hot..
Was CT seriously trying to deny punching Davis when he was confronted in the middle of the night? He said something like “some gay kid got punched in the face, what’s that got to do with me?” Uh…maybe the fact that you’re the one that did it?
I don’t understand the opening credits. Why do they have the good guys running away from the bad asses? Is MTV trying to say they set up this challenge specifically so the bad asses would win and the good guys would lose?
Also to the poster who said that Colie might emerge as a villain, I don’t think that’ll happen because she’ll be too busy crying and falling in love with all the (white) guys in the house.
whoever wrote #59 is not the original NYWord. this site is really going to the dogs if people are making copycat profiles now…
NYW
It wasn’t me. As you know, I sign my stuff. We’ve had our issues, but that’s not my style.
I agree, posing as another poster is wrong.
Cheez,
I never thought it was you. I know if you wanna talk smack, you want the credit for it!
My guess is that it’s most definitely CT. I’m the only one who’s said he’s a fudgepacker…I guess this is his retaliation. As quiet as it’s kept, the tvgasm staff has been alerted.
So let it be known to everyone reading the recaps and comments, any comment purported to be by NYWord, if it’s insulting to NYWord, it’s not NYWord.
It’s CT, the fudgepacker. Stay away from Kenny bitch! That ass belongs to Tina!
LOVE,
NYWord, of the Cleopatra-Hapsburg House
Actually I wouldnt be surprised if it was Diem, “defending her man.”
Hello sweetie, let me be the first to tell you, like only NYWord can, you’re a beard. That means a “straight” guy is using you to make it look like he doesn’t like the cock. Unfortunately for you, CT is way too over the top, and punching Davis crossed the line of giving him (and your “relationship”) the benefit of the doubt.
Sorry you have cancer and all, it definitely sucks to face that at such a young age. But you really shouldve listened to Wes and Evan’s advice on the last challenge, cause they were speaking for the generally sane population that watches this show.
When you were making such a big deal about your first kiss with the douchebag, all of us were shaking our heads, wondering how you could not see how obvious it is that that Boston-accent spouting mouth you desired has indeed been the receptacle of someone’s penis…
But you know, he did say something to you in what was it…paraguayan or something…so maybe that was like the magic code that gives you the right to pose as the one and only inimitable NYWord on tvgasm….
Nah…dont think so…even Cheez is on my side, Bearded Lady…
NYW, OTC-HH
Chee-Z-TeeVee Addict, I didn’t send in a recap. I just wished I was a recapper. I don’t even know how that works. Besides, I have my own website. It’s http://realitytvguide.blogspot.com and I just want some readers. I’m just helping him, because B-Side would do that on every episode.
looks like they took care of the copycat mutant NYWord…way to go be MYL! that’s what I call truth, justice, and the American way!
Good recap L-Con. It was in the spirit of B-Side, while keeping your own flavah (my Bahston accent comes right out heah).
I am sad that there is no Kina this season. It was fun seeing what eye shadow she would apply with a butter knife. At least we will get some Aneesa hair surprises. Where is Wes?
Great recap, LCon! Worlds better than the other ones, in my opinion.
I don’t get what’s going on with the poseur NYWord being CT? What happened?
Does anyone know if Janelle and Johnny are really a couple or not?
NYW–
Why are you writing fake posts to Diem? Do you honestly think she or CT posted on here?
You need to focus on your job and not take crappy reality tv summaries so seriously, perhaps.
I like the theory on CT being gay, NYWord.
That might explain the super-low rise jeans that caused MTV to break out the pixellation. Although, if he was gay, don’t you think he might do some “man-scaping” and manicure those hedges?
LCon,
Great recap. And do not be ashamed of your crush on Alton. I don’t know a single person- male, female, gay or straight- who doesnt look at him and say “wow”.
Did Danny mention Mel at all? Are they still together?
And I am sure they put Ev with Danny so that they can try and rev up some drama. Do ya’ll remember her myspace rant about what a lying douche Danny was during Fresh meat?
” Number of times CT and Danny will make me extremely embarrassed to be from Boston – Over/Under 17,289 ”
Ummm…. kindof like how Kina and Colie have made me weep inside for all of us normal girls from NJ…. I think they shouldnt be allowed back in the state & should be forced to live out their days on a garbage barge out in the ocean.
L-Con I just want to give you props for a great recap! I am reading this and laughing (‘specially the Danny and Alton cap thing, that had me going for some reason) and wondered who was the great writer. Thanks!
Well, L-Con, much better. I think you get better each time with your recaps. I enjoyed this one, yeah it was long, but I still enjoyed. I look forward to reading every week. So, yeah, this road rules thing…definatly not the cast I would expect, but I’m for sure glad to see that Beth, Coral and those oldies are NOT on the show. I definatly like seeing some new cast members on here, and of course some of the old…What I don’t understand is, why was Tonya such a puss on the real world, but now she does all these and she’s all hard? Whatever, I can’t stand that chick!Can’t wait till next week!
Hey all,
just a reminder that the comments section ideally is a place to comment on the show and give props or constructive criticism to the writer.
If you are lookin to pick fights or create debate that has nothing to do with the show, please do so in the forums.
Danka,
MYL
Wow!! Chee-Z-Tee-Vee Addict and NyWord calling a truce? While I read your comments I had that old Pepsi or Coke song playing in my head “…I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony…” Awesome!
I see that we have to be logged on to leave comments again. Good. I hated that whole Anonymous thing.
Madeyoulaugh,
Are you an employee of TVgasm? Just wondering since Chee-Z thanked you for getting rid of some poser poster.
I can’t wait for the next recap. I cannot rid myself of this nasty TVgasm addiciton. I think my family is planning an intervention. If I show up on A&E I’ll send some shout-outs to my peeps before I board a plane to Promises.
Oh, BTW, wasn’t Paula anorexic on the RW and didn’t Tonya have some sort of illness that kept her so much in debt she cried and brought it up every espisode on her season? I see Paula looks healthier and now I wonder if Tonya’s “illnesses” were located below the belt if you know what I mean. If memory serves me correctly she had some guy friend who used to be her best friend and used to help pay her medical bills. Sorry, I’m bringing old shit up but she’s not the same Tonya who I saw on her season of RW.
I don’t think that was me! lol!
^^^ OMG!!! It wasn’t you, Chee-Z…it was NyWord. I SWEAR that it was an honest mistake. LOL!
Now that I see my mistake, it’s kinda funny how I could mistake you and NyWord (not that there’s anything wrong with that).
But really in comment number 65 NyWord mentions that they stopped the copycat poster and he thanks MYL. Just being nosy.
LMAO!
is it just me, or have the actual “challenges” on these shows gotten increasingly boring ever since TJ Lavin became the host (gauntlet 2 i believe)? i miss the good ‘ol days of running around in chicken suits, beating the hell out of each other in mud pits, ice cream eating contests, and running through obstacle courses in fat suits! now, it seems like every other mission is climbing a ladder or crossing a bridge over water…eh.
L-Con –
I haven’t seen the show, but was perusing & decided to read your recap, and wanted to say you did a great job! It was funny. I like it better than the Hills recaps, maybe because it’s a new show, clean slate, fresh pallet, something like that…
“If you haven’t been able to tell by now, I’m card-carrying member of Team Alton. ”
Me too, L-Con. Me too.
Please don’t talk about Boston like that.. I’m born and raised here. Everyone knows that the only idiots that start fights are the underage Frat boys who go to the same tourist places all the time. Case in point: Just stay away from those places..
I believe the story with the “shields” goes like this:
If you have been chosen by the other team to go into the inferno and you win the life shield, you MUST choose another person to go in.
If you have not been chosen by the other team to face the inferno and win the life shield, you can do whatever you want. (ie save your arse or save someone elses)
Great recap L-Con! Go Sox!
CT is a complete fucking retard, pure and simple. That guy should be locked up for his own protection. Like most retards, he has no concept of his own strength, of honor, or of personal accountability. He is not half as tough as he apparently thinks, despite his ridiculous boasts. Unless this total jerkoff drastically alters his cocky demeanor, he will probably meet a very tragic and untimely end, involving either gunshots, stab wounds or a severe (but not undeserved) beating in an alley behind a bar somewhere. CT projects himself as a tough guy on reality TV by getting in drunken fights with people he knows are a lot weaker than him. The Boston Haaaaaaahd guy act wore thin a while ago, and there are plenty of guys in New England half his size who would straight up murder him in a one on one confrontation. CT knows these guys are out there, and he knows they won’t make ridiculous speeches first, they’ll just knock him out- that’s why his Boston tough guy act is strictly limited to beating up gay guys and weaklings on MTV. An embarrasment to Boston, this guy is a joke, a loud-mouth, and a total fucking pussy.
One of the best recaps I’ve read in a long time. I laughed the whole way through.
“Dressed like a Mahdahn Day Unibahmah”
Took me a sec to understand what you were saying, but when I got it I thought it was hilarious! Great job!
Um. the southernmost tip of the US is Ka Lae, Hawaii.
You’re all dumbasses. ; )
The debate about continents wasn’t about the southernmost tip of the US, it was intended to be a reference to Susie’s comment about being at the southern-most tip of a CONTINENT.
Hawaii is not part of the CONTINENTAL US. Hawaii is not considered a continent at all, although it IS the southernmost STATE in the US. Panama is the farthest south you can go on the North American Continent. A fact that was pointed out in post #13.
At any rate, do we really care? If I wanted a freaking Geography lesson, I’d go to GEOGRAPHYgasm.com. I’m not here for no book-learnin’, I’m here for laughs. Which, by the way, L-Con is doing a damn good job of supplying!