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Monday, January 15, 2007
5:45 pm
74 Comments
HALLELUJAH! The Hills is back, and if this season premiere was any indication, it’s better than ever. In only one scant thirty minute show, we were introduced to a variety of drama — ranging from the fallout of J-Wahl and LC to the new dubious pairing of Heidi and some kid named Spencer (he’s bad news all around). Add a dose of girl-on-girl hatred (Audrina is like so on the outs now), and we’ve got the makings for what should be a drama filled season. Oh, and did I mention the pregnancy test?As the big season premiere opened up, Lauren gave us a few updates about the cast. Audrina, last seen answering phones at Quixote Studios in Hollywood, had made a huge career move… to answering phones at Epic Records. Who would have ever thought that a girl with such a magnetic and complex personality would be stuck languishing as a career assistant?
Meanwhile, our old fave Heidi had received a promotion at Bolthouse Productions, despite last season’s stern warnings that it takes forever to move up in the event-planning industry. Clearly, no one took into consideration that Heidi was a) hot; b) a girl; and c) the breakout star of an MTV reality show. Anyway, at her new position, Heidi was no longer fetching tuna sandwiches and staring at her draconian list of responsibilities (ie. 8 AM start work. 6 pm stop work). Now Heidi was working the door at Hollywood hot spot Area (located just around the corner from the TVgasm home base). Even more importantly, however, was that Heidi had found a new douchebag to fill Jordan’s sizable shoes. His name was Spencer, and already, we knew he was trouble because apparently, he was seeing Audrina and Heidi at the same time. Hence, the Heidi/Audrina split. Of course, this didn’t precipitate a Heidi/Spencer split also. That would be too sensible.
But what about our star, Lauren? Well, as you may remember, she made the bonehead mistake of turning down a fake internship in Paris to live at a fake beach house in Malibu with her boy, Jason. However, Lauren soon told us that things went “from bad to worse.” Question: if things were already bad, why the heck did you turn down the damn internship? Okay, I’ve already committed the first sin of Hills watching: applying logic.
Nevertheless, as we all read about in the tabloids this summer, Jason and LC broke up, and as the show began in earnest, we watched as Lauren pulled up to J-Wahl’s apartment in her fancy new Mercedes convertible (those Teen Vogue internships must pay a pretty penny). Apparently, Lauren had arrived to return Jason’s junk, but no one had bothered to tell Jason that this was supposed to be an emotionally draining. The first thing he said upon her arrival was “Damn! Golf clubs!” as if he was just the lucky recipient of a Toys For Tots campaign.
As Lauren plucked bags of his belonging out of her car, Jason marveled at the scope of this activity. “So much stuff…” he mumbled, his brain simultaneously exploding in the process. To be fair, he faints every time he walks into Costco. I kind of felt bad for LC because as she teared up at this sentimental transfer of goods, Jason appeared stoned off his ass, giggling at every little thing. Eventually, the two had a “talk” where he said he still wanted to hang out with LC — lest the source of his fame leave him behind — but she rebuffed him repeatedly. “Are you still going to be my buddy?” he then asked, failing to specify if she would be his fuck buddy or jail buddy. LC again said no, explaining, “I can’t be normal with you.” Of course, it’s hard for anyone to be normal around a furry troll who communicates through an elaborate system of mumbles and sighs.
Finally, Lauren drove away, and the familiar refrain of Natasha Bedingfield’s “Unwritten” filled our ears. Yes, MTV’s using the same song, which still fails to really work for the opening credits, but whatever. And speaking of opening credits, I couldn’t help but notice that Audrina and Whitney received higher billing than Heidi. What gives?
Speaking of Heidi, we then traveled over to the Bolthouse offices where the big man in charge, Brent Bolthouse, announced he wanted an old school Hollywood opening for Area. As long as that involved Brent shaving down the caterpillars over his eyes, I’d be all for it. (I am officially never getting into Area now. Sorry, Brent!) (But seriously, those were crazy Peter Gallagher-ish).
Anyway, Brent then said, “Heidi, we have a lot of work to do; so don’t bug me.” Yeah, good luck with that.
Meanwhile, over at Epic Records, we caught up with our Epic Receptionist, Audrina. The took out her phone and called Heidi, but apparently she forgot that other girls don’t like it when you hang out with their boyfriends behind their backs. That’s right, Heidi ignored the call, but the real story here was that Heidi’s ringer was a very placid, calm bell chime. I’m sorry, but I’m not convinced that was real. Heidi’s a Fall-Out Boy ring tune if I ever saw one.
Elsewhere in Los Angeles, Lauren made her triumphant return to Teen Vogue where apparently she was serving the longest internship EVER. Just like last season, Lauren took a seat in her office/walk-in closet and sat around, waiting for something exciting to happen. And sure enough, exciting things did happen. For one, Wh-wh-wh-Whitney made her spectacular return, all abuzz with her typical energy and daffy charm. She was all Anne Hathaway-ed out after her summer in Paris, and after some generic babbling about all the photo shoots and experiences she’d had, Whitney finally got around to asking about Jason. This was all fine and good, but there was a giant elephant in the room: WHEN WOULD LISA LOVE RETURN?
Well, LC actually mentioned that she hadn’t talked to Lisa Love since the whole Paris decision. I wondered why that could be. Maybe it’s because Lisa Love thought LC’s internship had ended three months ago. Nevertheless, it was finally time to leave the closet and enter the frightful lair of Lisa, but sadly, there was no Blaine to escort the girls. As some of you may remember, Blaine took a job at Glamour, and now he spends his days chatting about fashion on The Megan Mullally Show. That’s right — he spurned Lisa Love for Megan Mullally. Big mistake, bud. Big mistake.
Anyway, the girls shuffled into Lisa’s office where she greeted them with warm smiles. Of course, it didn’t take long for the passive aggression to kick in. Lisa asked them how their summers were, and Whitney replied, “Summer was great. Paris was amazing.” Yes, Lisa, you might remember considering Whitney flew to Paris with you.
Nevertheless, we learned that Whitney had met Fiona (ooh! Wait, who?) and had visited Coco Chanel’s apartment. Lisa Love then kicked her passive aggression into high gear as she noted, “Well, that was a great choice of yours to make to go to Paris.” Unlike you, LAUREN!
Lisa then aimed her wrath directly at LC by saying, “Lauren didn’t go to Paris. She’s going to be always known as the girl who didn’t go to Paris.” Oh SNAP! I half expected Lisa to then dismiss the girls with a condescending “That’s all,” but she had a few more sparks of PA to get out.
“How was your summer at the beach with your boyfriend?” Lisa asked. “Did that work out for you?” She does not STOP! I love Lisa Love. Of course, Lauren had nothing to do but give her trademark deflated look and admit that she regretted skipping out on Paris. Wah wah wah.
“Please bore someone else with your questions.”
Later, Lauren cried in the apartment, saying that she moved in with Jason to stop the crying, but then she was crying because they were fighting, and then she was crying because they were breaking up, and now she was crying because he wasn’t there to stop her. Oh, and she was also crying because she was chopping onions and Heidi had opened up a canister of tear gas by accident.
Okay, I kid I kid. Heidi did, however, say something sweet to Lauren: “The best part of Jason was you.” I actually disagree. I think the best part of Jason was the vacant look in his eyes whenever he encountered simple arithmetic.
After the break, we then headed into Act II of the premiere, which focused on the wonderful world of Spencer and Heidi, or as I like to call them, Speidi (pronounced like Spidey). Anyway, the two lovebirds arrived at Spencer’s favorite restaurant, Don Antonio’s, a Mexican spot in Santa Monica. Once the two sat at their table, Heidi babbled on about Area opening up and whatnot. She then revealed that all the people at Bolthouse hate Audrina, or as she later called her, “The Drina.” This of course segued into Heidi interrogating Spencer about The Drina, asking if they ever had a thing. Spencie flat out denied it; although, not before his voice stuttered and raised a few octaves. Maybe it was the margaritas or the light reflecting off Spencer’s forehead, but Heidi believed him, and ultimately, the two wound up going back to his apartment and spending the night (a.k.a. consummating the Speidi union).
Spencer: a round square-face, or a square round-face?
The next morning, Heidi returned to the apartment and filled Lauren in on the status of her relationship with Spencer. Apparently, he has recently become very affectionate and now has a tendency to actually hide behind Heidi. Awww so cute and strange. Yes, it appeared as though this relationship was destined for great things…
Too bad we then found Spencer enjoying fro-yo with the beast herself, AUDRINA! The two talked about Heidi behind her back, not understanding why she hated The Drina so much. “How do you not like you?” Spencer asked, clearly overlooking that whole “lack of personality” problem Audrina suffers from. He then asked her if she was still friends with Lauren, but Audrina noted that since Heidi and Lauren were roommates, they were kind of like a team. “I’ll be your team member,” Spencer then offered, and to show he was serious, he then suggested that they go to… DON ANTONIO’S!!! Uh oh. Spencer also promised that the restaurant had “life-changing Mexican food.” I ate there once about four years ago. It was good. I haven’t been back. Hardly life changing, unless, of course, you’ve never eaten Mexican food (and/or enjoyed the sights and sounds of Santa Monica’s mattress district, which is where it’s located).
We then cut to the grand opening of Area where we found LC hanging out with her old pal from The ‘Guna, Jen. Yay old faces! The girls sat on a couch and scanned the room for hot guys, with Jen finding a potential paramour at six o’clock. However, since Jen was sitting in one direction but facing another, LC was confused as to where six o’clock actually was. When she asked for clarification, Jen’s brain promptly shut down, and she suddenly realized she was unable to provide the proper coordinates for hottie detection. After some time, she did revise her statement, saying the hottie was at eleven o’clock instead. Eleven, six — easy to mix up. Numbers are very tricky.
Now, I’m not up with my Brody Jenner famedar skillz, but I think it was he in the shadows that the girls were spying on. And for those of you wondering who Brody Jenner is, he’s the son of Bruce Jenner, and ex-flame of Nicole Richie. He’s also dating Kristin Cavallari, if I’m not mistaken. That, of course, would make a Brody/LC union quite intriguing. Of course, I could be wrong about all this because honestly, who cares enough to really follow Brody Jenner’s love life?
Nevertheless, while Lauren and Jen people watched, Heidi was on the red carpet, working the door with her odd looking co-worker whose name escapes me. Spencer soon showed up and revealed himself to be a total moron of J-Wahl-ian proportions as he dragged THE DRINA in tow. Hey, idiot, did you not remember anything of what your alleged girlfriend said about Audrina vis-a-vis her hating her? Well, Heidi gave them both a cold greeting (I’m not sure she even said anything to Audrina), and as they walked into the club, Spencer told The Drina, “I didn’t know she actually like was openly hating you.” He then added, “You see, I’m too self-absorbed to actually ‘listen’ to what other people ‘say.’”
Later, Spencer tried to clear things up with Heidi in the club, saying, “I swear on my mother’s life I didn’t come up with her.” Yeah, um, sounds like he really loves his mother. In the middle of this discussion, however, Audrina barged in and gave Spencer a hug, kind of her way of saying, “He’s mine too, BITCH!” Ladies and gentlemen: meet Spaudrina. Personally, my favorite part of all this was that in the background, Whitney Houston’s pop anthem “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” blared through the speakers. And just like that, Area became slightly less cool.
Beware the spectre of SPAUDRINA!
After the commercial break, we found Heidi back at the Bolthouse offices, talking to her co-worker, the ever elfin Elodie. The two talked about how The Drina showed up with Spencer and how bad that was and blah blah blah. But this discussion of Spaudrina could not go on much longer because Heidi was feeling dizzy and nauseous. In fact, she’d been feeling this way quite often. Hmmm… Does it happen in the mornings? What could it be?
Over at Epic Records, Audrina babbled to her co-worker about Spencer and what a pig he was. Apparently, she doesn’t even like him (which explains why she continues to sacrifice her friendship with Heidi to grab fro-yo with him), and at the club, she said he was all over her. “I was like ‘Spencer stop!’” Audrina recalled. I wonder if this was before or after she gave him that big hug.
Meanwhile, Heidi went to a drug store and bought herself a generic pregnancy test kit, which seemed kind of odd. Could she not pony up the extra dollar for a name brand? A little Clear Blue Easy, perhaps? Anyway, Heidi returned to the apartment and marched up to the bathroom to test herself. The results? Oh, that will be next week. Until then, we’ll just have to wonder: IS HEIDI WITH CHILD?? Or is she just feeling the after effects of those life-changing tacos at Don Antonio’s? My money’s on the latter.
When you simply must know, CVS is there for you.
What did you think about the premiere? What do you think about the new faces and dramas? Personally, I love it.
74 Comments
how is this up already? i thought the season premiere was tonight???? i’m so confused, but i literally covered my eyes with my hands automatically to avoid reading a single spoiling word, lol.
MTV aired the premiere this afternoon… sneaky sneaky…
MTV truly sucks and providing cliffhangers…we clearly see Heidi drinking alcohol during the preview of the season. At least it wasn’t as obvious as those Duel previews. Good thing the president stepped down.
I realize I’m holding on to that last silly shred of hope that SOME reality is actually real, but I will NEVER understand how these people (that’s you, spence) can act like such asshats when they know it’s going to be broadcast later. I mean, does he honestly think that the American public will think: “Oh damn, yo! That boy’s got MAD skillz!” (that’s you, K-Fed).
Anyway, did anyone else notice that when Jen finally got her mental clock workting that LC looked towards 3 o’clock? Hahah. Ahhh, dummies.
Actually, LC’s 3 o’clock was Jen’s 11 o’clock, sort of. It just occurred to me that the reason why LC was so confused is because 6 o’clock would actually be behind LC, and of course, behind LC was a wall.
B-Side,
There you go infusing logic again! Do you honestly think that LC ACCOUNTED for Jen’s wonky positioning? Methinks you are spending too much time becoming these people’s friends
I kid. More interviews, more!
Did anyone hear this? It hit me like halfway into the whole pregnancy test trip. At the end of the episode, that was the most morose version of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” I’ve ever heard in my life. Music for this show sucks.
So happy this show is back on! But I must admit that Brody Jenner and his friend Spence are pretty pathetic at their attempts at fame. I’m a little embarrassed to say that I watched their short-lived reality show The Kings of Malibu a few years ago. It’s clear that they want to get famous by acting like complete asses on reality TV, which I guess is kind of working out for them. I’m also really excited to make fun of some of Brody’s future haircuts that they showed in the preview for the rest of the season.
I’m so glad this show is back. Nothing makes me think “WTF?” in a more enjoyable manner than this show. I didn’t even realize it was back. I just happened to be flipping through channels at the right time. I’ve apparently been missing out on MTV lately.
So, anyway, yay! The recaps for Laguna/The Hills are the best – funny recaps for a show I will actually watch.
This season has started off great! My only concern…all the teeny-boppers that will flock to Don Antonio’s. I’m soo pissed!!! Yet another reason to hate Spencer!!!
WooHoo the Hills is back! ok well this episode was pretty good. What is up with this whole internship thing, aren’t normal internships only supposed to last for 6 months? Most likely they couldn’t find another company willing to sell out for their 15 minutes!
I just have one thing to say to Heidi about Spencer… Why?
oh and B-side I’m pretty sure that K-Cav dated Brody for a brief time, but she’s currently with Nick Zano.
Hey newtrino,I heard that song too.I laughed all the wat thru it!Was that dude singing it for real?Thought for sure B-side was gonna say something about it.
the best lines of the night:
Heidi: I love the flowers.
Spencer: …so you’re staying over, right?
Heidi: Sure!
so…dinner + flowers = getting some. so we cant talk about JWahl takin some nose candy and beating LC but we can talk about sluts. Great!
Also, from the preview of what’s coming up this season…
Spencer, AKA Doogie Howser, saying “You have no idea what ill do to you HOME BOY.” LAWL. if he says that anywhere else other than West Hollywood he gets rocked.
This premiere definetely competes with the season 2 opener of Laguna…you know, when Kristin and Jason are on the beach and he asks if he’s supposed to be really happy to see her.
Also, Spencer may be more of a d-bag than Tyler, Kyndras on-again off-again toolbag boyfriend.
Gonna be a great season…keep up the good work B-Side!
uhhh is spencer related to christopher walken by any chance? dude is scary looking.
I got a fever. And the only prescription… is more don antonio’s!
but how horribly funny would a speidi spawn be?
yay hills!
I have a feeling The Hills is going to follow the same pattern as Laguna Beach.
Season 1: Pretty good
Season 2: Awesome!
Season 3: Dunzo
I think this show sucks. First of all why would Jen point out Brody to LC I thought that was pretty lame and well, down right contrived. He clearly just stopped dating Kristin like what 5 minutes ago and I am having a very difficult time believing that Lauren is that freakin desperate. Also I thought it was stupid to have Heidi go into a random mom and pop drug store and then get home and whip out a CVS brand pregnancy test. Good job with continuity and product placement MTV. I think that this show is highly scripted and again contrived which make it a total snooze fest and Lauren and Heidi’s apartment is deplorable clean up ladies. That’s All!!!
I LOVE The Hills!
I liked Heidi last season, and I like her this season so far too.
I’m glad Lauren split from 8-Bahl, because he was definitely starting to wear her down. She looks really drawn and tired in this ep, but in previews of upcoming eps she looks like the LB LC. Good riddance to that twitch – I don’t think his problem is coke, I think his problem WITH coke is a symptom of his being nuts.
Audrina reminds me of Sesame Street: Lauren, Heidi, Whitney, Audrina – Which one doesn’t belong? She’s out of her league.
I googled Spencer (Pratt), not only was he on that goofball show “Princes of Malibu” – he produced it. He is so sleazy, leave it to a fuck-weasel like him to impress girls with a second-rate restaurant, and convince them it’s his “special” place for “special” girls. I see a long string of B Movie actresses and No-Tell Motels in his future – or Paris Hilton – or maybe both simultaneously.
Lisa Love. That’s it, just Lisa. Love. She still reminds me of Blair Brown.
Thanks for the quick re cap B-Side.
I’m so glad The Hills is back! yeah! My favorite part was when Lisa Love told Whitney next summer she could go back to Paris. Poor Lauren! Hopefully she never makes that mistake again.
Spencer looks like a 13 year old.
Did anyone see pictures of J-Whal and Nikki from LB together. A match make in heaven!
Thanks B-Side. When you ask the question of logic and the show, sometimes I wonder why logical people get hooked on this show.
This logical person LOVES the Hills! Also, I know that MTV is going to release Season1 on DVD because this logical person has 8th&Ocean on DVD.
Yay, it’s back!!
Does anyone know if “8th & Ocean” is ever coming back? That was my other guilty pleasure.
Great re-cap! I’m looking forward to this season of the Hills.
Any chance you will ever re cap Sweet Sixteen? That show is hilarious…. some of those kids leave themsleves wide open so maybe it wouldn’t be enough of a challenge
Spencer is gross! If 2 girls are gonna duke it out over some guy he should at least be hot! – This guy is soooo cheesy – Not only is he unattractive, but when he speaks, all that comes out is scripted-sounding corniness…….
Audrina & Heidi need to compare notes & realize what this guy is all about.
Although HIGHLY contrived, I think this show rocks. I’m glad to see it back on and I think LC deserves every bit of Lisa Love’s tongue lashing. She’s an idiot for passing up her “fake” trip to Paris.
Spencer is the most disgusting (inside and out) looking guy I have EVER seen!! He MUST have some serious cash or I’m sure these chicks would not be messing with him. Oh, and Heidi, sweetie, if that wasn’t another one of production’s contrived plots, you better PRAY you’re not pregnant because that kid would be U-G-L-Y if you even had it (which I doubt)… Heaven forbid Heidi couldn’t fit back into her size -2s after squeezing the kid out… LOL
We all know Heidi can’t be pregnant…does she look like someone who understands basic human reproduction? Or for that matter, passed health class? Homegirl probably forgot to eat for like 4 days because she was too busy starting work at 9 and ending at 6 for cro-magnon Brent.
Lisa Love enjoyed that shit way too much. She must have run out of puppies to kick that day. Rrreeoowwwrrr!
Did J-Wahl really beat LC?? Someone please provide details ASAP!!!
Heidi is not pregnant….you see her out and about in the previews. Why give us a cliffhanger to just ruin in it in the previews?
LC had the benz last year when she left Laguna. Loving the Speidi. I couldn’t believe (well actually I can) Jason’s weird as hell dumbfoundedness when LC was dropping off his stuff. I felt for her. That shit is hard. I really CANNOT believe Lisa Love’s PA and her undercutting. Yes, LC was foolish for choosing Jason over Paris, but damn woman, show some tact. Tell her flat out, at the time of the decision, that you’re disappointed, etc and leave it. That wasn’t professional at all.
I have never seen such a blatant display of playing two girls as Spencer’s at the Area opening. holy shit. Both girls should have slapped him, at least twice, and told him to fuck off.
And yeah, it was in a lot of the mags that LC and Brody were hanging out a while back. But no longer.
All in all, I liked the premiere and am so amped for the season! And yes, that was the most depressing song remake I’ve ever heard; apparently Girls don’t want to have fun, they want to wallow and die, or thatps what the song implied anyway!
Of course there’s no way she could be pregnant air376, we don’t let those kinds of women out of the house.
I didn’t mean that she was out and about at the grocery store therefore she can’t be pregnant.
A 21 girl who is trying desperately to be famous just finds out she is preggers by a guy she is casually dating….not going to be out partying like they show her in the previews
I totally saw Jason at LAX (club, not airport) sunday night. He’s short, but friendly enough. He was surrounded by girls the whole time. He was there with Andy Milonakis and some other guy I recognized as a non-major on Laguna (def a sidekick).
oh yeah, mandy moore was there with dj am too… so that’s confirmed.
Way to go picking up on how LC’s situation at Teen Vogue makes no sense.
If it was an internship, why is she back? (Ie, why would they want her after the crap she pulled?)
If it’s a job, why did she get the summer off?
newtrino, I heard that too! I saw the words on my closed captioning and thought they looked familar and then actually started listening and thought “Holy crap, that is the most depressing version of that song that I’ve ever heard.”
Also, this stuff probably just drives me crazy because I’m a fashion major too but the whole scene with Lauren and Whitney at Teen Vogue made me so angry. Why are either of them still there? An internship lasts a semester not indefinitely. Lisa Love definitely wouldn’t have called both of them in to talk about their situations like that and no self-respecting editor would ever say “you’ll always been know as the girl that didn’t go to Paris” to an intern.
I think the show is highly contrived too BUT I can’t stop watching. I was wondering how long it would take for the girls to start fighting with Audrina. While Audrina appears to have the intellect of a rock, she is a gorgeous young woman. I thought for sure J-Wahl was gonna try to tap that so it doesn’t surprise me that one of the girl’s boyfriends eventually tried it. I don’t think Audrina likes Spencer, she enjoys the attention and the fact that he can bring her to events like the Area club opening. In fact, I think Audrina likes to hang out with people like Heidi who have any type of connections until the connections no longer serve any purpose and she’s ok with moving on. Hey, it’s L.A. people!
I like Heidi. I think she’s a fun girl and she’s def. fun to watch. But I couldn’t help notice that she’s fighting with LC and she was last mentioned in the opening credits– behind Audrina and Whitney. I think we’re gonna see less of Heidi this season.
I’d like to see LC finally hook up with someone decent and I’d like to see Audrina get her own show as she struggles to make it as a star.
I must admit, when Heidi told Lauren that the best part of Jason was Lauren, I was moved by her sincerity…or her well played fakeness. She was a good girlfriend. It brought a few tears-but then again, so do those GEICO commercials with the sad cavemen.
Also, yes, Kristin is seeing Nick Zano; and Lauren was seeing Brody for a split-second (pre Nicole, I think). I’ve spent the last month catching up on In Touch mags that I’ve missed reading while I was working on my Master’s. Hooray! I’ve still got a few more issues before I have to find a real job.
you know how sometimes on a sitcom, the biggest “star” of the show is listed first, then the second biggest “star” is listed last? i think that’s what’s going on with the hills. just an observation.
Kristen and Brody were broken up when he met LC. She is dating Nick Zano now.
Spencer grosses me out. He is like an uglier Doogie Howser. Audrina just stay away from him… Heidi you should know better.
I am so happy LC go rid of Jason. But I felt her pain when she was crying. She looked so sad.
Yay!!! It’s back!!
I love Lauren and Heidi. I am glad Lauren got rid of 8-Bahl!! What a loser!! I have to admit, though, I will miss seeing him screwing everything up all the time…I really hope Heidi gets rid of Spencer. Another loser just trying to get more time on TV since his own try failed, failed, failed.
This season looks awesome. I can’t wait to see it!! Thanks for the great recap, as always, B-Side.
Did anyone notice that Spencer gave Audrina the same flowers he gave Heidi the night before???
Based on this one episode, I’ve got my money on Spencer winning Idiot of the Year in the next TV Gasm awards.
J-Wahl is definitely an idiot, but at least he doesn’t say too much. Spencer is an idiot and has diarrhea of the mouth.
I thought the other convertible LC drove when she left Laguna was a BMW?
I could not believe that Spencer actually showed up to the club with Drina. That was insane, and Im suprised that he pulled it off as it seems Heidi still dates him afterwards. Seriously, any normal person would not bring their girlfriend’s enemy with them to a club where she is at the door.
I thought the bathroom scene was totally faked and scripted. The event probably did happen but the producers must have told Heidi that they need to reshoot it. It seemed way to perfect; camera angles, facial expressions, lighting.
But overall, great first episode and can’t wait for more lol
Great episode and recap. And BTW-Gotta love the MTV Afternoon Sneak. It helps free up additional TV viewing/DVR space for the evening, and the bonus is faster/stronger/better recaps. Yay!
Anyway, I just wanted to add that I don’t think it’s so unusual to have a continuing internship. I mean after all, both girls are still in school. I had a few recurring internship-type jobs when I was an undergrad, like every summer and during winter breaks-they didn’t just end after a semester. Now I’m not so naive that I don’t know that the whole set-up is contrived. I’m just saying that it’s plausible, especially if a job is related to your major.
A major clue to the show being contrived and probably scripted with a few extra takes here and there: When LC and Whitney saw each other for the “first” time after the summer, they were so NOT warm to each other. At all. For supposed friends. I dunno, just shady.
Lauren was giving everyone the evil eye this episode. Oh well, I guess that’s what breakups with J-Wahl do to you. I’m glad she got rid of her, but she’s obviously pretty upset about it. And I don’t blame her for that reaction to Lisa Love’s PA attitude – though I loved watching it.
Spencer is a major tool and Audrina is boring. But this season looks promising. I can’t imagine if Heidi got an abortion or something, THAT would be great TV.
Haha, “fro-yo!” Haven’t heard that expression since the mid-nineties. Thanks for bringing it back, B-Side.
Anywho… could Brent Bolthouse’s hair BE any greasier? One would think he could afford some gel.
I wonder if Spencer – in all his douchebagedness – will actually out-douchebag J-Wahl. Is is possible? We shall see.
Can’t wait for the rest of the season!
For some reason I thought the premier would be next monday, so when I saw it on today as a repeat I was like whaaat!.. so i didn’t watch it on the premier but whatever. However I’m so excited it’s back!
I could not believe Lisa Love for the whole “you’ll always be remembered as the girl who didn’t choose paris; how did that work out for you…” It left me speechless that she would say something like that!
I think the word you are seeking is “hydrocephalid”.
Lisa Love Rules!!!! She was so icily sarcastic and LC’s face was classic.
I also loved the return of the tantastic Jen. MAybe she can still promise to keep JAson 10 feet away from LC. And surely she knew who Brody Jenner was. I know him from Us Weekly and you know those chicks have subscriptions! I actually think that he and KCav were pretty serious and lived together for a while.
Awesome recap. I’m seriously pumped for the rest of the season which already promises to blow away the just-can’t-live-up-to-Laguna-Season-2-ness of The Hills Season 1.
PS, call me lame, but I thought the Whitney Houston blaring MADE Area cool.
I am sorry, I just dont see how this show got picked up for a second season. These girls seem sedated, and lack personalities.
It is just boring! They shoot the show in three places, work , their condo, and a club. Don’t get me started on Spaudrina. Bless her tiny brain. She is one of the most unfortunate looking women, I have ever seen on a reality show.
It seemed as if Spencer’s intentions were twofold:
1. To cause conflict between Heidi and Audrina and be the object of both girls’ affection (barf!).
2. To get as much camera-time as he could on this show.
Why else would he seem to be going out of his way to cozy up to Audrina at a party in which Heidi was working? If he was going to be a dirty dog, he didn’t have to be doing it at a club party in which both women were attending. Unless he’s just a blatant troublemaker.
Spencer is a complete jerk and appears to want people (the viewing audience) to label him as such. Well he got his wish.
I usually don’t criticize people’s physical appearance but in this case I will gladly take the liberty and capitalize on his oddly-shaped head. He looks like a human version of SpongeBob SquarePants.
Sorry for posting so much… where is Bella? Heidi’s dog? I hope she still has her!
#50….Would you actually be suprised if I told you she lost Bella? Me either.
McCreamy — she actually said hi to Bella during one scene. The dog was off camera.
LOL omj75
I must have missed where she said hi to her. *whew* the pup is still alive. I hope there’s not a reason they have yet to show her
Does CVS know that their pregnancy tests are being sold at Marvin’s Pharmacy?
AUDRINA DOES APPEAR TO BE SEDATED. BUT THAT IS JUST THE COOL WAY TO ACT IN L.A. I GUESS. I LOVE HOW SPENCER DID THE WHOLE, “I SWEAR ON MY MOTHER’S LIFE” TO HEIDI AT AREA THAT AUDRINA “FOLLOWED HIM TO THE CLUB AFTER HE TOOK HER TO THE SAME “SPECIAL” MEXICAN PLACE FOR DINNER THAT HE TOOK HEIDI TO THE NIGHT BEFORE. LISA LOVE IS THE EPITOME OF “BOSS FROM HELL” WITH THOSE SNIDE REMARKS AND THAT WRINKLED FROWN. WHO SAYS THOSE THINGS? “SO LAUREN, HOW WAS YOUR SUMMER WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND? DID THAT WORK OUT FOR YOU?” HONESTLY. I AM TRULY DISGUSTED WITH LISA LOVE.
OM, I totally caught the CVS pregnancy test/Marvin’s Pharmacy thing too. I was wondering the same thing! Glad someone else caught it too!
Does anyone know if that MTV Maui show is going to be recapped here? I was kind of looking forward to it and then 10 minutes into the show, the “actors” were making me nauseous. This show is such a blatant rip-off of Laguna Beach. Chaunte is desperately trying to be Kristen Cavalleri down to the blond hair and “I don’t care if I use guys & mess with their minds” attitude. All the guys are manwhores, it’s disgusting. At least Laguna Beach tries to showcase ONE person with good qualities.
Heidi doesn’t think she’s pregnant. She just wants that guy to think she thinks she’s pregnant. And what is with the generic pregnancy test!? Thanks, PRODUCERS.
RE: OM, I totally caught the CVS pregnancy test/Marvin’s Pharmacy thing too. I was wondering the same thing! Glad someone else caught it too!
Posted by: ABC Girl | January 18, 2007 11:49 AM(#56 of 58)
*****
Oh DAYum I did not catch that! Also for some reason I missed your post nestled only 2 above mine.
What I meant by MY post, was, who goes generic for something like that? Just save the dollar and go EPT.
I am seriously disappointed in Heidi. Last season she kicked Jordan to the curb for simply “snapping at her too much” but now shes going to keep a guy around who is so obviously cheating on her and let him hit it raw?! jeez girl at least get some birth control. Audrina annoys me because Heidi is right you just don’t do that to one of your friends whether you’re interested in the guy or not. Lauren has some serious insecurities. That’s why she is always lapping up KCav’s sloppy seconds. LC you’re pretty show a little more confidence who needs JWahl?
btw is KConrad going to be posting?
the previews for the season looked really good but i feel like i’ve mostly seen everything in the first episode…i hope there’s some juicy hidden stories.
Has anyone else noticed that Heidi and Lauren never really were that good of friends. I mean they had an ok working relationship but they never seemed very close. They seem friendly, but not exactly friends. That could explain their half-ass hellos.
In this triumphant return of The Hills, I have to wonder: How do über dorks like Brent Bolthouse run the nightlife options for those of y’all in Los Angeles? I think the reason he is so cold and bitter is because he was disliked in high school, and now he’s mean to pretty girls, just to show them!
Inappropriate or not, I thought it was hilarious when Lisa Love whipped out the lashing on Lauren…now watch it happens to me at my job. Then it won’t be funny.
BTW why is Heidi letting Spencer hit it raw, she begging for an STD, when he’s blatantly cheating on her. Ew, he’s all slick and slimy looking, especially when he’s talking.
I just don’t get this show. I mean, really, LC still “interning”; Heidi “promoted” at Bolthouse – and NEITHER of them were worth a crap last year. Lame.
OH – and I’ve been to Area several times and never seen dumb ol’ Heidi. I’ve seen LC, but san cameras.
Area is such an over-hyped club – if you want to check out a TRUE “hot spot”, you should go to Boulevard 3 on Sunset Blvd. just west of Vine. This place is amazing.
Is “Area” an 18 and over club?
Eww… “letting him hit it raw” is SUCH a nasty way to put it! I have to go take a shower now.
By the way, my husband and I BOTH caught that the CVS pregnancy test was bought at a random pharmacy. WTF?
the timelines on this show are so FAKE!!
the scene with heidi thanking spencer for the flowers happened the same night of the area club opening, not after their date at don antonios. why else would they both just HAPPEN to be wearing the EXACT same clothes they have on during the club scene? put your tivos to work:spencer – long sleeved grey shirt, heidi- black sleeveless top with a single black & gold strap going down the back.
when she got home the “next” morning, she had on the same shirt as at don antonios, a black top with two straps at the back.
the date with audrina looked like it happened in the morning, then he took heidi home that same night. what a dirty ass dog! he probably got a two-for-one special on those flowers.
the sad part is that girls are stupid enough to get pissed at each other without saying one bad thing about the douche bag guy.
Spencer looks just like Giovanni Ribisi-gross! Can we do a split screen of these two?
Tigereye #27- LC had a black BMW convertible last year(not a Benz). In fact, you can still see the BMW in the opening credits. Wow- LA internships pay a LOT!
If Audrina is no longer friends with Heidi or Lauren, then why is she still on the show? Maybe after Heidi dumps Spencer they will make up.
B-side, we need more pics in your recaps and please recap Maui Fever…
This should be an interesting season. Lots of drama (maybe even baby mama drama..not). I thought the Lisa Love smackdown was hysterical, the first time I saw it, then it was kinda sad and mean, but maybe it will kick LC in the ass so that she doesn’t do something so dumb again. Stranger things have happened. Spencer is a slimeball. Enough said. Too bad Brody Jenner isn’t the one hittin’ it raw with Heidi cuz he is a fine piece of ass. I would much rather see more of him than his greasy little friend. One thing that no one has mentioned that I found annoying and funny was wh wh wh whitney’s pronunciation of “amazing” the chick said “amazINK” not once, but twice. WTF??? Where’s Stephen and Talan?
#67 i just saw what were you talking about…so that means after spencer showed up with aundrina, heidi STILL went home with spencer…what a dog..thats pretty dumb on her part
the_baddest-bitch, i noticed wh wh wh whitney’s pronunciation of “amazing” as “amazink”. i’m pretty sure i’ve heard her pronounce the “g” strongly a few times before. kind of odd… maybe she tries to sound as if she can speak correctly and formally, especially in front of lisa love? or maybe she just talks that way.
“Does CVS know that their pregnancy tests are being sold at Marvin’s Pharmacy?”
am i missing something?, but i don’t understand what there’s to catch at the CVS pregnancy test/Marvin’s pharmacy thing. is it just that the producers could have shown Heidi getting EPT or something else well known but they didn’t, which makes it even more obvious that it’s scripted?
#1 I’m glad the show is back!!!
#2 I wish Heidi was the star of the show, not snoozeville LC. Heidi is the only one that even comes close to a fun to watch gal like our missed KRISTIN!
#3 I hate that Brody is on the show. He is a definite plant by the producers, to further infuse the show with “drama” because of the Kristin angle. Brody and Kristin were pretty serious. Then MTV probably asked him to date LC as payment to appear on the show. Then when the show wrapped he went to Nicole.
Oh and also….I LOVE B-SIDE! I only watch this show BECAUSE of the recaps!