Recap: The Hills: Surprise!

The Hills

By Ting Lee | Wednesday, August 22, 2007 | 11:45 pm | 41 Comments

We start at the Hillside Villas this week. Deadrina invites Lauren to have drinks with her and Bustin at Bella that night. Before Lauren accepts, she wants to know how things are going beween her and her beret wearing beau. Deadrina doesn’t want to rush anything because she’s never had a boyfriend before. Lauren is shocked by this revelation. “How can you be 22 and never had a boyfriend?” Deadrina smiles her no-upper lip smile and points to herself, “I have commitment issues.” And really, really dead person-like eyes.

LC presses on, “But you’ve had sex right?” Deadrina rolls her eyes like she’s gotta be kidding. And thus we find out that Audrina’s a bit of a slut. Lauren, trying not to be judgmental, looks down at the carpet as she tells Aud that she’s a smart girl and she should “go with her gut, but use her head.” And condoms. Aud noncommittally responds, “We’ll see…”

Ddddeadrina

…if I can keep my eyes open for long enough.

We see Heidi enter The Bolthouse offices and I guess now that she’s pretend engaged, she doesn’t have to try anymore. She’s wearing ripped jeans, a men’s-style button down shirt, and flip-flops. No more thigh-high boots and short shorts. Wait, maybe she’s got to cover up so no one will see her bruises. Her coworker, Elodie, (whose name I’ve never mentioned before because she’s less of a character than a plot construction device, besides it’s such an ugly name, E-LOAD-y), asks Heidi what’s on her finger.

“It’s a splint, I sprained it playing softball with the neighbors. No one grabbed me and twisted my hand so hard it almost snapped,” says Heidi, nervously. Just kidding. Heidi waves her bedazzled hand at Elodie who demands to see the ring up close. “O. M. G-eee-eee,” Elodie sings, which could stand for “Oh my god” or “Ow! Major gaudiness!” By the way, what’s with the initializing phrases on this show? The folks in Hillsworld don’t have large enough vocabularies to need to save time. Heidi launches into the story of How Spencer Didn’t Ask Me to Marry Him But That’s Just Semantics. It was completely unexpected— Elodie interrupts. “You’re not pregnant, are you?” “NO WAY!” says Heidi. “Being with Spencer is like already having a first child. Didn’t I tell you that he spray-painted the walls in our apartment while the babysitter (Brody) was in the other room?”

In the tricky editing of The Hills, the camera is on Heidi’s hand when Elodie asks her point-blank if she’s “fully engaged.” The next shot is of Heidi’s face where she says she feels like she’s about to have a panic attack thinking about a wedding. Not confirmed.

Skepticalcowork

Wait a second, that looks like the ring I pawned when I was late on my Visa bill last month…

Elodie says if she had been asked not to get engaged at Heidi’s age, she would not have been ready. Heidi explains, “The thing is if you meet a Spencer at my age, it’s a whole different thing.” Elodie looks at her skeptically, “Really?!?” She asks. “Yeah,” says Heidi, gazing at her ring. Spencer’s gifts may not be overly sophisticated, but they sure are fun. (According to the Oxford English Dictionary: Spencer, sgl. n. 1. An unstable, self-centered man who slowly isolates a young woman from her friends thus becoming her only source of influence, all the while telling her it’s love. slang 2. A douchebag).

Heidi tells Elodie that Spencer is not only her fiancé, but her soulmate. Man, this is confusing. We know from the tabloids that Speidi are saying they are not engaged, and yet, here’s a ring, a “fiancé,” and a skeptical semi-friend. There’s a Hollywood engagement for ya. Elodie advises Heidi to have a long one, and not to buy a dress anytime soon, which is kind of like saying don’t spend any money on this because eventually you’re going to realize he’s a dick and you’re going to feel retarded when you return the unworn wedding dress to get money for first and last month’s rent on the new apartment you’ll have to get for yourself only to discover the dress costs more than the ring.

A Spencer and Brody wander down the street, window-shopping like the two girls they are. Brody points in the window of a furniture store and tells Spence he needs to buy furniture because his apartment is “janky.” I like Brody’s honesty, especially when he expresses it through urban slang. Mr. Jensen, you are fo’real! They shop for board shorts and Brody inquires how the weekend went. A Spencer waxes on about how he always thought that marriage was the dumbest thing for guys who couldn’t get laid, which doesn’t make any sense, so he goes on to say, “you know? I’ll give you half of everything all you gotta do is make my food and hang out with me.” Yes, A Spencer, that is what marriage is about.

Brody wants to know where the bachelor party is going to be. A Spencer says he’ll throw it for him, since Brody’s the bachelor, not him. A Spencer sure doesn’t have the marriage thing all figured out. Brody laughs at him and tells him it’s sad that he’s not going to be having sex anymore since all the married people he knows don’t get laid. I thought it was funny, too, until my brain handed me a mental picture of Speidi getting down. Eww. Ewwww!

Praying Mantis Mating 1

Over at the officecloset at Teen Vogue, LC tells Whitney that she has to third wheel it with Deadrina and Bustin that night. Whitney flares her nostrils in sympathy. Lauren wonders aloud what the appeal is, and Whitney says he’s good-looking, plus with his spokesmodel money from “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter,” he’s doing pretty well for himself. Once LC tells her the Vegas abandonment story, Whitney says things like that are red flags. Well, so are trying to change your name from Justin to Bobby, and not being able to cut your own food in a restaurant. But I guess if you have commitment issues like Deadrina, the more problems a guy has, the easier it will be to break it off. Lauren wants to try to like him because she’s tired of seeming like a bitch who doesn’t want anyone to have a good time. She doesn’t say that last part, but we can see her thinking it.

Heidi arrives home at Chez Janky to discover that A Spencer has purchased an Centipede Arcade machine. Heidi looks hurt and says, “I thought when you called me from the store, we decided on Ms. Pacman!” No, not really. She asks when it’s going back, or at least, if they’re planning to paint over it. A Spencer is offended by her stupidity and points out these are “vintage graphics from 1980.” I don’t think 1980 qualifies as vintage, but it definitely qualifies as janky. They both have to keep ducking under the low hanging chandelier type lamp in the center of the ceiling. You know, the kind of lamp that hangs over a dining room table, A Spencer? Heidi says just that, and he pretends she means they should get a pool table. These are the games you can play, Heidi, when I’m out with my buddies and I lock you in at night. Where should we put the Slip and Slide?

Arcadegame

Kill it before it kills you!

Bustin and Deadrina arrive at Bella. Bustin’s sporting a sweatshirt with a hoodie, and Dead remarks he looks “comfy.” Passive-aggressive much? He says he’s been laying around all day, feeling like shit. He could barely hold up the container at his camera shoot and say “I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter.” Life is so hard!!! LC shows up, looking gorgeous, and she asks Bustin about his bike and to please be careful with Deadrina. “That’s precious cargo you got there!” Bustin looks at her and burps loudly in response. “I ate too much I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter,” he says, now not just feeling like shit, but acting like it. Audrina tries to make a joke, but LC isn’t buying. She stirs her drink.

Deadrina puts Lauren on the spot and asks if she thinks Bustin’s a good guy. Sage Lauren says, “You know, it takes more than a couple drinks to tell.” Yep, it takes fights, jealousy, ruined holidays, and missing a trip to Paris. This girl knows. Bustin wants to get the focus off himself and has some questions for LC. She asks him to give her his evaluation. “Don’t you love Lauren?” Deadrina goads. Has she been drinking heavily? First, to put LC on the spot like that, and then to set her up for criticism. I tell you, one or two more episodes before she’s the sucky person. Bustin says, yeah, he’s in love with Lauren, he’s just dating Dead to get to her. It’s uncomfortable and mean, and Aud tells him he’s a $%&ing ass. LC pipes up, “Do you want YOUR evaluation?” Before she can say he can go shove his fake butter up his ass, Bustin quickly replies, “No! I don’t care.” LC smiles sweetly, and counters, “Audrina does.” Because if she doesn’t, off the show, sucky person.

Ainthesweet

Isn’t he romantic?

Bustin lays out a Hollywood platitude: “It is what it is.” At least he didn’t say, “Everything happens for a reason, ” because I’d be tempted to follow him around town to try to toss a carefully aimed stick into the spokes of his motorbike. As he skids face first down Sunset Blvd., body akimbo, I’d yell, “EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, YOU KNOW? IT IS WHAT IT IS!”

The next day the girls lay out by the pool. Audrina doesn’t apologize for last night, she just says it was awkward. LC points out it wasn’t nearly as awkward for Aud as it was for her. Working up a little more courage, Dead admits Bustin wasn’t nice. LC agrees, but adds “Sorry,” to soften the realization. Dead even says Bustin was rude and disrespectful. Future Buddhist Nun of America LC asks Aud when she looks at Bustin, does she says to herself, “There’s a gentleman!” Aud says no, but does LC think she should call him? Maybe he had food poisoning and that’s why he was cranky! O.M. G. Really? A. Y. T. S.? (Are you that stupid?) LC asks if she genuinely wants her opinion and Dead admits she doesn’t, so “just leave it.” Lauren presses, “Are you done, a hundred percent done?” Audrina coins a new catch phrase (akin to “Yadayadayada”) by blowing air through her lips, making a soft fart noise. It sounds like “FFFbbbbfffbbb” and that means, “no, but I’m not going to tell you.”

Newbff

I wonder what Heidi’s doing right now.

Speidi sit on the couch at Chez Janky eating off paper plates and drinking out of plastic cups. When they finish eating, they make a game out of trying to lodge the plates and cups in the chandelier, but one body part has to be touching the couch at all times. No, not really. A Spencer admits that maybe they do need to buy plates and spoons. Heidi blurts hopefully, “And a table?” “A COFFEE table,” says A Spencer, patting her head. He hands her a pill, but as he turns his back, she tosses it behind the Mantis game. “This looks like a fun house!” she says. A Spencer’s eyes dart towards the camera.

Heidi says she told Elodie (Oh, it’s pronounced like “Melody,” without the um, prettiness) about A Spencer’s purchases and that Elodie thought it was weird that Heidi didn’t have a say. A Spencer surreptitiously makes the “cut it” signal to the camera guy by running his index finger across his neck, but they keep rolling. “Yeah, I guess we’re not making these decisions together!” says Heidi, giddy with a thought of, well, not her own, but Elodie’s, which is an improvement. A Spencer changes tactics. “They’re not DECISIONS, they’re SURPRISES,” he says through his clenched teeth. He holds onto the back of the couch so as not to choke her. She continues that it’s stressful. “I love having this power,” he says, grimacing in a way that I believe if Heidi threw water on him he would spawn multiple mogwai.

Review Gremlins 1C

Who’s this Melody bitch and where does she live?

Lo and LC meet at the overrated Pinkberry, a place that serves frozen yogurt that actually tastes like yogurt, frozen. WTF? Lo loves it so much! She likes Fruity Pebbles on hers! Ick. LC says she’s in a rut, just going to Les Deux very night. BOOOORING! Then she tells Lo about the Bustin/Deadrina tricycle date and how it wasn’t good. If it had been any other guy, she would “have been like, ‘No…’” She trails off, but I like to think the end of that sentence would have been, “. . .burping in someone’s face is not acceptable communication, even if you do grace the cover of romance novels.”

Lauren’s disenchanted enough with Deadrina that she wants to blow off working out with her. “Eat your gross fat-free yogurt and enjoy life,” demands Lo. Luckily, when LC calls Aud, she wants to blow it off, too, because she’s going to see Bustin. LC looks exhausted and defeated. “I can’t do the roommate-with-the-sucky-boyfriend thing again.” Lo agrees. “It didn’t work out so well,” she pronounces. “What if Audrina records a song to a Yaz loop and Bustin raps on it, and we have to pretend at every press conference we never listened to it so we don’t say something mean?”

Bustin shows up to meet Audrina at Charcoal, which a has a lovely view of Jack-in-the-Box from its front windows. He’s wearing a lumberjack punker outfit: plaid shirt, short pants, and doc martens. Nice. Maybe he wasn’t laying around feeling like shit all day. Aud mentions she hasn’t talked to him in a week. He asks her why and she tells him he was grumpy and mean on Friday. No, he says, he felt like shit. So what’s your excuse now? she asks. No, not really. He says some vague things about things, emphasizing that he really doesn’t care about anything, and she says maybe they are better off as friends. He says more bullshit about bullshit, finally ending with, “Truth and tIme tells all, ” which is, coincidentally, the name of his book of haikus, coming out this fall on HarperCollins. They toast to their mutual fear of commitment.

Hugbuddies

We’re still gonna bone, right?



And then, something beautiful happens. At Chez Janky, we see Heidi painting over the Hollywood mural with white paint. A Spencer comes home and when he sees what she’s doing, he poses in the classic “I’m not going to hit you” stance by pressing his palms together in a praying motion. “SURPRISE!” yells Heidi. “I have a surprise for you!” A Spencer is creepily mad. He asks her if she kidding, he calls the wall “boring.” Heidi sticks to her guns. “We can decide what to do with this wall together,” she reads from a piece of paper that has a speech Elodie wrote out for her.

A Spencer turns to her and smiles sweetly. “I totally agree,” he says, turning creepy up to sinister. “From now on, we make decisions together,” she tells him. A Spencer’s face is frozen in a grimace, his yellow skin turning pale. “So this is what it is,” Heidi says, leaving the room. He repeats that, and employs another “I’m not going to hit you” tactic by clapping maniacally. As we wind down this week, A Spencer picks up the roller and finishes painting Heidi’s first win.

Hahalooza-1

Atta girl.

About

41 Comments

  1. 1
    SmallTownGirl
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 12:30 am

    Go Heidi! I’m proud of her for standing up against Spencer. I would’ve covered up that ugly mural too! Spencer needs to realize (wait, hes too dumb for that) that the apartment isn’t his bachelor pad.

    Bustin is so fugly. Has he eve r heard of a thing called HYGIENE?? I think not. I dont know what the hell Audrina sees in him. He’s disrepesctful, immature, ugly, stupid, ugly, moron, and did I mention ugly??

  2. 2
    curlyb123
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 1:53 am

    OMG i loved it – great job Ting Lee, had me laughing anf smiling throughout the whole thing – the spencer dictionary definition was classic =]

  3. 3
    BonaFide
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 5:12 am

    Better recap than last week’s… Here’s to trends in improvement!

  4. 4
    Montague
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 5:17 am

    Are you sure it’s not E-Load-E? I mean, it is what it is. Hilarious.

  5. 5
    Tiffany
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 5:28 am

    REPOST

    I enjoyed the recap- good job =)
    You go Heidi!! Way to surprise Spencer with the new wall…

    I like Heidi and Spencer. I think they’re love is genuine. From this show- and the previews for next week’s show where he goes to her house for the weekend.

    They both did some shady-sh*t last season, but hey- that’s life.
    I wish them well.

    Justin-Bobby? Man is he a weirdo. Fine, but a weirdo!
    I thought they decided to be together???

    Im not a lesbo or anything- but LC is verryy pretty this season…she’s lookin better to me.

  6. 6
    Rox
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 6:18 am

    “He says more bullshit about bullshit, finally ending with, ‘Truth and tIme tells all,’ which is, coincidentally, the name of his book of haikus, coming out this fall on HarperCollins. They toast to their mutual fear of commitment.”

    OH OH OH – I’m getting all misty. Damn. You sure can write so it hits you right in the gut.
    Talk amongst yourselves while I collect myself…
    THANK YOU….thank you…

  7. 7
    tater
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 6:51 am

    Man that Spencer should work his way into some horror flicks because the way he was looking he looked like he was possessed by something…or really mad. Very creepy.

  8. 8
    MissKatrina
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 7:29 am

    Oh emmm geee, Ting, this was hilarious! The Mogwai, the praying mantis pic, well done!

    I was squealing with excitement when Heidi painted over that janky, noveau-riche poseur ode-to-douchedom that Spencer called a “mural”. If I was that landlord, I’d evict their asses on the grounds of tackiness.

    Has anyone heard anything else about Heidi and her new boobies being in Playboy?

  9. 9
    jliz
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 7:42 am

    seriously, I think Heidi’s life is in danger. It’s only a matter of time before Spence is unable to control his anger.
    Lauren needs to take a break from being the girl who was in a bad relationship who is now the expert on everyone else’s relationship. It’s getting boring…

  10. 10
    Munchkin
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 8:08 am

    love the recap!

    does anyone think its retarded how Justin wants to change his name to Bobby . . . because Bobby sounds similar to Johnny . . . the person he tries so hard to be, Johnny Depp. It’s embarressing!!!

    what is up with Audrina’s face??? don’t get me wrong, she’s pretty, but her dead EYES! why does she always look like her eyes are looking 6 inches over everyone’s face? And face is so round for being so skinny!

    I’m assuming that Spencer gave a Heidi more of a promise ring as opposed to an engagement ring . . . a promise to try and be famous and creepy forever! I’m thinking that Heidi’s “rebelling” and “standing up for herself” is all staged too, as is Spencer “being a good guy” and finishing the paint job on the graffiti wall.

    I highly agree that if Spencer were in fact a good guy and is only “acting” like a douche for the camera’s . . . why would a good guy want to be perceived so negatively? he’s a disgusting creepy loser!!!

    LC does look prettier this season. I think she’s wearing more make-up and is styling her hair more. maybe she lost a few pounds too?

  11. 11
    vividblurry
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 8:13 am

    Did anyone get the impression during Season Two that Spencer was purchasing the apartment, not renting it?

    For some reason, I remember him implying that he was buying an apartment. But in this week’s episode, Heidi references their landlord.

    Maybe I misunderstood something in Season Two, but Spencer comes across as so shady.

  12. 12
    BK
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 8:32 am

    Um anyone want comment on how it took like three days to get this recap posted?

    That aside, good recap! Spencer did make it seem as though he purchased the apartement, though CLEARLY they are renting. He sucks and so does she…especially in the previews when she comments on Jason and LC making another “movie.” Obviously she had a hand in that rumor…someone needs to give them both a beat down.

  13. 13
    Tiffany
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 9:40 am

    Munchkin- I think your right..it really seems to be a promise ring. How in the world can she say fiance on national television?? Although, your girl IS from Colorodo and might not know that ring is cheap as hell. I know I’m bad with diamonds and such and can’t usually tell what’s what. But how embarressed Heidi must be right this moment seeing how much he really paid for it. Me and my honey are no “real ballers” but I wish he would buy me a $700 ring!!

    Vividblurry and BK- I too peeped how landlord was said..yet I thought he bought that apt…??

    One last thing-while I hated the mural on the wall- I do like the one below the bar.

  14. 14
    mandymax
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 9:53 am

    Spencer scared me on this one – when he came in, saw Heidi painting, and went silent . . . oh, my God, the look on his face, the tone of his voice, the way every single muscle in his body was tensed up . . . part of me wonders if the only thing that saved Heidi’s skin was the camera crew being there and filming every bit of it. That was not a normal rage. Over something so small as painting a WALL? There shouldn’t even be “RAGE” involved in something like that. He is clearly used to getting whatever he wants, whenever he wants it, and how DARE Heidi tell him no? It’s truly only a matter of time before he loses control and backhands her, and this becomes a physical cycle of domestic abuse. He’s already mastered the psychological manipulation of her.

    As for Lauren – I honestly don’t think she’s trying to come off as someone who knows what’s best for everyone else when it comes to guys. Think about it – she’s been RIGHT ON. Spencer? Justin-Bobby? Can anyone seriously argue that Lauren’s been too judgemental of either of them?????

  15. 15
    jenimone
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 10:19 am

    Did anyone notice how FREAKISHLY HUGE Spencer’s pupils were?!? Not that it would be the first time he’s looked a bit suspicious….

  16. 16
    Joe Blow
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 10:30 am

    Sorry, I hated this recap. I think what bugs me is the overall writing style. There’s no intro, no real fleshing of the writing. It’s always like, “Lauren looked at Audrina. Audrina looked back with her dead-eyes. They decide to go to Pinkberry.”

    I don’t know where the Justin/Bobby-being-Fabio thing came…other than the fact that they have a similar hair length. I don’t know, it was just really random.

    But on a positive note, I did like the screencaps. And agreed that Spencer is getting angrier all the time…

  17. 17
    Anon E. Mouse
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 10:50 am

    Unlike most people here, I like Justin. Besides being a good looking guy, he just doesn’t give a damn about LC being famous or having her like him or impressing the cameras/audience. He’s interested in being with Audrina and he doesn’t need anyone’s approval. That Audrina & LC are still picking bf’s based on whether their friends approve,only shows they have a lot to learn about life–money & fame can’t buy you wisdom.

    Eventually we all connect with someone who isn’t the guy everyone in our lives will like. You learn (after a few heartbreaks) that the person you should be with doesn’t come one-size-fits-all.

    Audrina has had positive things to say about her personal relationship with Justin-Bobby. The past –where he abandoned her in Vegas– is the past and from the way she has mentioned her discussions with JB to LC, it sounds like they are working to move forward without rushing into anything major. Until I hear or see otherwise, I think Audrina should continue to see him as long as she’s happy with him. BUT she should balance her boyfriend with her girlfriend and stop trying to make both worlds MESH. You can’t force things like that.

    I heard Heidi’s new song. I really liked it. I probably wouldn’t buy it, but I liked it.

    P.S. I really like Lo and I hope they have her on the show more often. She’s quirky and cute and smart, and this show needs a female like her around.

  18. 18
    natania
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 12:11 pm

    That was one funny recap! Thanks Ting! I LOLed a few times.

    Funny stuff about Speidi go to this site:
    http://leaveumalohan.blogspot.com/2007/08/spencers-web-of-lies-are-beginning-to.html

  19. 19
    natania
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 12:14 pm

    Loved the Recap
    Thanks Ting!

    For funny stuff about Speidi go here:
    http://leaveumalohan.blogspot.com/2007/08/spencers-web-of-lies-are-beginning-to.html

  20. 20
    EstelleHairball
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 12:46 pm

    Thanks to natania for posting that link–I loved it.

    Though I think Spencer is truly scary, I also think he went to some low budget acting classes. It’s obvious that Speidi gets less camera time with Heidi living apart from LC, so he’s looking for ways to amp up the drama and not have all of his footage end up on the cutting room floor. Also, the way the previews are edited, he basically admits that he is trying to isolate Heidi. And together, they make comments about movie making that help me believe they were involved with the rumors.

    PS-good job Ting!

  21. 21
    sarahb
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    very funny recap! Loved it. I loved when you had Heidi throw the pill behind the game.

  22. 22
    natania
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 1:09 pm

    Anytime EstelleHairball

    If you liked that link you will love this:

    http://leaveumalohan.blogspot.com/2007/08/spencer-pratt-pathological-liar-evil.html

    They really see through Spencer!

  23. 23
    mo_knows
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 1:49 pm

    Lauren- total single white female… what is up with her being so into her friends’ relationships?? She really needs to back off, it’s really getting creepy.
    Justin/Bobby- Isn’t he a hairdresser?? And that’s how he styles his own hair?? Please… and has anyone seen the pictures from Brody’s b-day party recently? He’s sitting at a table with all of them, so apparently he and Audrina have not split up.
    Whitney- MORE Whitney! She seems so normal compared to the rest.
    Speidi- Every single thing they do is staged for the cameras. Can’t you see them plotting- “For this season, let’s be the cute ‘newlywed’ type couple that has to figure out how to live together and get used to each other’s quirks and habits” Please….

  24. 24
    MichyPR
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 2:24 pm

    “Did anyone notice how FREAKISHLY HUGE Spencer’s pupils were?!? Not that it would be the first time he’s looked a bit suspicious….

    Posted by: jenimone”

    I also thought his pupils looked huge. Spencer looked scary, sinister is a good word to describe him and Heidi looked unsure/scared IMO. Wow, he looked like he definitely didn’t like that she “defied” him. Psycho!

  25. 25
    popo
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 3:29 pm

    This episode didn’t do it for me, and I thought the recap was pretty good considering the material. I agree that Speidi is in full let’s get crazy so MTV will come tape our vapid existence instead of Lauren’s mode. Next episode, Toothy McD & Plastic Fantastic will organize an illegal puppy fighting ring. That would make for some good t.v.

    Justin is a trust fund douche that is trying to be Jim Morrison, but lacks the intelligence and talent. Sad really.

  26. 26
    jozeyg
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 4:50 pm

    I agree with Anon E. Mouse about Justin/Bobby.

    He’s really good looking…and has that Johnny Depp thing going on with his looks, style and they way he talks, except for his bad manners. He really hasn’t treated Audrina bad except for the Vegas thing, but past is the past. And it really does seem like he’s not trying to get anyone’s approval or kiss anyone’s ass to make them like him. All he wants is to be with Audrina.
    Audrina even said in the Hills aftershow that Justin is uncomfortable being around the cameras. So I think everyone(including LC) should give Justin a chance because he doesn’t seem like a bad guy after all. The only thing that matters is how he treats Audrina, and not anyone else. So LC(as much as I love her) should stop concentrating how these guys act towards her and how she’s affected by them.

    Compared to all the guys that’s been on The Hills, I think Justin is probably the most good looking. He doesn’t act like an attention whore like the rest of them.

    So good luck to Justin and Audrina =)

  27. 27
    jozeyg
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 4:52 pm

    I agree with Anon E. Mouse about Justin/Bobby.

    He’s really good looking…and has that Johnny Depp thing going on with his looks, style and they way he talks, except for his bad manners. He really hasn’t treated Audrina bad except for the Vegas thing, but past is the past. And it really does seem like he’s not trying to get anyone’s approval or kiss anyone’s ass to make them like him. All he wants is to be with Audrina.
    Audrina even said in the Hills aftershow that Justin is uncomfortable being around the cameras. So I think everyone(including LC) should give Justin a chance because he doesn’t seem like a bad guy after all. The only thing that matters is how he treats Audrina, and not anyone else. So LC(as much as I love her) should stop concentrating how these guys act towards her and how she’s affected by them.

    Compared to all the guys that’s been on The Hills, I think Justin is probably the most good looking. He doesn’t act like an attention whore like the rest of them.

    So good luck to Justin and Audrina =)

  28. 28
    lora
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 5:35 pm

    all the girls on the show, Heidi included, are beautiful young women. But it’s not all about looks.

    I think Lauren has a big heart and truly cares about her friends and family, but she’s no pushover, which is great. She’s definitely very easy to relate to, despite coming from a privileged home.

    Audrina’s eyes are large and expressive and she seems like a very sweet, sincere, and fun person……with alarmingly dubious taste in boys. JustinBooby is disgusting! He might be good looking, but his repulsive personality makes him as ugly as Spencer. Dump him, Audrina!!

    It IS great to see Heidi asserting herself by painting over that stupid graffiti. But after watching her two-faced antics last season, I’ve lost just about all respect for her.

    Jen Bunney…she always seemed so fake to me. I’d cross her off my BFF list, too.

  29. 29
    nhmom
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 6:10 pm

    I SO agree with mandymax, all I could think at the end with Spencer was, OMG– if they weren’t filming, he looks like he would beat the CRAP out of Heidi!

  30. 30
    UglyCutie
    Posted August 23, 2007 at 6:57 pm

    I don’t know what people want from Ting. I thought the recap was soooo funny. I couldn’t have said things better myself.

    As for Bustin…he is an ass. These peeps who are posting that all that matters is how he treats Audrina…blah..blah…blah…HAVE YOU NEVER DATED?

    LC was not being rude to Bustin at all. She was making convo. Then he was just flat out rude. She thought (as did I) that he was rude the first time they met but gave him the benefit of the doubt and met up with them for dinner and he was a jerk again. If a guy I dated acted like that in front of my friends, family, or co-workers, I would dump his ass just for the fact that it would embarrass me.

    I feel bad for LC because I think she really wanted to like this guy because of the Speidi fiasco but then got this idiot. So now she looks like the bitch.

    Besides, Bustin can be himself all he wants but that doesn’t mean that “himself” isn’t a douche. Audrina should fuck him (he’s cute) and run for The Hills. Red flags all over the place…geez! Oh, and funny how uncomfortable-in-front-of-the-cameras Bustin “reunited” with Aud after she was featured on the first season of The Hills. Mmmmmm…..

    Speidi’s just plain doomed and as much as I would like their time on my TV to come to an end, I am aching to see this relationship crumble before the entire nation. And if some of you posters who mentioned that these two are just playing roles are right…why would anyone pick THESE roles?!

    Dear God: Why do I care about these people?????!

  31. 31
    Joe Blow
    Posted August 24, 2007 at 9:55 am

    You know what, though? Justin was rude, but I kind of understand why. Lauren acts like he needs her approval to date Audrina or something and I’m sure it’s strange for him. Although Audrina was inappropriate by asking if Lauren thought Justin was a “nice guy” right in front of his face, Lauren could have just smiled and said, “We’ll see.” But no, she had to haughtily say, “It takes more than a drink to tell.” Come on, I would have been annoyed too. He’s there to date Audrina and not Lauren– of course he doesn’t want to be judged by her.

    I love Lauren, but she acts like she’s a wall in-between her friends and their boyfriends, and they don’t want to deal with it. Who would? And at the pool, where Lauren was all, “So, are you a hundred percent done????” Eager much? Stop worrying about it so much Lauren!

  32. 32
    georgiababe
    Posted August 24, 2007 at 12:49 pm

    Does anyone else watch The Hills Aftershow with Jessi and Dan?

    It was on MTV Canada only last season, but it’s airing in the US as well now. They do some hilarious editing – for example, this week, they made a horror movie using Spencer’s reactions to finding Heidi painting over his precious mural. It’s really quite funny – and they usually have at least one Hills girl talking to them either on the phone or in the studio.

    If you’re a Hills fan, I highly recommend it!

    Oh and great recap Ting. Much better than last week.

  33. 33
    lora
    Posted August 24, 2007 at 6:58 pm

    I disagree that Lauren is trying to be a wall between her friends or that she is worrying too much. She CARES about her friends! She wants them to be happy and to be in relationships. Audrina WANTED her to meet Justin and get to know him, and she said that Justin wanted to know Lauren better, too. And it was obvious that Lauren WANTED to like Justin! But he was a disgusting slob who seems to think he can get away with anything he wants just because most girls think he is “hot”

    I think Lauren is a class act, all the way.

    What a pity that Audrina didn’t choose the “kick rocks” option and sailed one right through his scruffy bonehead.

  34. 34
    TinkerbellAPixie
    Posted August 25, 2007 at 3:07 pm

    I saw that aftershow thing and found it to be a little obnoxious. I loved the horror spoof but the rest of it was just a little loud.

    I wanted more time with Whitney in the cloffice. She is my favorite person on this show and we just do not get enough Whitney time. More Whitney/Less Elodie!

    As for Justin – I have the 2nd episode on right now – it’s the part where he meets Lo and LC in the apartment. He was rude first. He strikes me as a pretentious arrogant prick. In other words, the perfect Hills guy.

    I’m surprised more guys aren’t up in arms about the representation of their gender on this show.

  35. 35
    anniedawg25
    Posted August 25, 2007 at 3:57 pm

    the “Bustin” “Deadrina”Dead” ..etc..nicknames are kinda confusing and getting old. sorry.

  36. 36
    heehaw
    Posted August 26, 2007 at 10:43 am

    lauren looks extra hot this year.

    but she should dump LO. (“don’t’ go to the gym, eat your pink berry and enjoy life.” uh LO that is how she got the big ass last year, too much booze and pink berrys!
    wouldn’t it be refreshing if mtv showed that lauren had some other interest in life other than drinking in bars? she can’t possibly be THIS SHALLOW?
    then again she likes jason.

  37. 37
    heehaw
    Posted August 26, 2007 at 10:46 am

    lauren looks extra hot this year.

    but she should dump LO. (“don’t’ go to the gym, eat your pink berry and enjoy life.” uh LO that is how she got the big ass last year, too much booze and pink berry’s!
    wouldn’t it be refreshing if mtv showed that lauren had some other interest in life other than drinking in bars? she can’t possibly be THIS SHALLOW?
    then again she likes jason.

  38. 38
    heehaw
    Posted August 26, 2007 at 10:51 am

    sorry for the double post. i got a server error window.
    OMG! it was so random.

  39. 39
    tater
    Posted August 27, 2007 at 6:48 am

    Tinkerbell-

    If The Hills gals picked good guys to date I imagine the show would become boring. I hope this show doesn’t represent what most guys do on dates (like belching, or kissing a gal right after smoking a cig). I know one of the reasons I watch the show is to see how NOT to date a lady.

  40. 40
    tater
    Posted August 27, 2007 at 6:50 am

    Tinkerbell-

    If The Hills gals picked good guys to date I imagine the show would become boring. I hope this show doesn’t represent what most guys do on dates (like belching, or kissing a gal right after smoking a cig). I know one of the reasons I watch the show is to see how NOT to date a lady.

  41. 41
    tater
    Posted August 27, 2007 at 6:52 am

    Tinkerbell-

    If The Hills gals picked good guys to date I imagine the show would become boring. I hope this show doesn’t represent what most guys do on dates (like belching, or kissing a gal right after smoking a cig). I know one of the reasons I watch the show is to see how NOT to date a lady.

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