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As the fourth season of Surreal Life kicks of on VH1, one thing becomes clear very quickly… Joanie Laurer’s underwear isn’t the only thing filled with nuts.
Review and VIDEO OF VERNE “MINI ME” TROYER NAKED PEEING on the carpet after the jump…
First to arrive in the house was former WWE and current star of her own scary porn video Joanie Laurer A.K.A. Chyna Doll A.K.A. a dude. She chooses the only single room which seems some what “mini” as if it we designed for someone of small stature. Chyna happens to be about 9 feet tall, and there is also a person who is just over 2 feet tall entering the house…makes perfect sense she should take the room. Next up in the house is former Brady, Chris Night, who is emerging as the Dave Coulier of this season.
Others to emerge to the house of shame, Da Brat, Next Top Models Adrianne Curry, moron model Marcus Schenkenberg, Verne “Mini Me” Troyer and Jane Wiedlin from The Go-Go’s.
When Verne arrives and finds his “special needs” room has been taken by Chyna Doll, he threatens to leave the house. Chyna encourages Verne to be the “bigger man” and just let the rooms remain as they are, but alas…he’s no big man. After a brief encounter the likes of which haven’t been seen since season 2 of Carnie Wilson’s talk show, Chyna finally relents and the mini room goes to the mini man.
Once the room conflict’s resolved, the cast gathers for “Dinner on Adrianne,” …literally. Forcing flashbacks to season 1 when Hammer and Emannuel Lewis refused to eat sushi off a naked woman, the cast of season four were all too thrilled to mow down off their housemate. Particularly Verne, who seemed more interested in Americas Next Top Table, than he was in the food. Thankfully someone had the sense to make “crab between your legs” and “tuna” jokes on the show, freeing me up from that responsibility.
As Verne was caressing and staring at the Next Top Table, he downed a few shots. making him too drunk to enjoy the nudity that ensued post dinner as Adria and Jane skinny dipped in the jacuzzi. He did come out later, just in time to drink some more and humoursly pass out on Chris Brady’s arm. Though the fun was just to begin…
In what is sure to set the little person movement back several days, Verne later emerged from his room in the middle of the night naked, drunk, and rolling around in his scooter in a failed attempt to find a urinal. What he found instead was a corner of a room which he mistook for a urinal, which is easy to do since most urinals are often obstructed by big blue exercise balls. seen The video can be here.
I was too busy peeing myself from laughter to really know or care how the episode ended, but I did get a sample of how the housemates feel about Verne in their song entitled “The Pee-Song” set to air at a later date. That video can be seen here.
Well this promises to be an interesting season to say the least. when the first hour includes a nude model, a nude singer, a nude midget and urination….one never knows where rest of the season may go. I have $5 on Chris Brady stroking a Hawaiian Tiki while the 2 models defecating on Verne whilst Da Brat is on the phone with her manager begging to be let free. Guess we will just have to wait and see.