Wow, there was A LOT of nose-picking in this episode of Toddlers & Tiaras. There must be a dearth of tissue in Georgia. Just use bark like everyone else there, girls.
It’s spray-tan, not PAM! She’s not going to fry you in a pan!
The Sugar Plum Pageant “is a glitz pageant” says the pageant director who has a ton of opinions about how things should be done and how moms should raise their kids. Why she doesn’t switch jobs is beyond me. The pageant begins at 4pm which means prime nap time is missed and boy does it take a toll on everyone.
First up we have Georgia’s answer to the Kardashian family, mom Keeta and daughters Karley and Kylie. Mom has taken the Jamie Sterling route and has decided just for fun to pit her two daughters against each other in the same age group at the same pageant. The oldest clearly defers to the youngest but the youngest spends most of her time whining, crying, whining, whining, then whining some more. Also, looks like mom is clueless about how to match foundation to skin as she tries to make Karley Hispanic. Also, brown and beige seem to be the colors of choice for hair, clothes and home furnishings in that house. Yikes.
Next up is third-child is the charmed little girl, Paisley is the family “turd” as they like to call her when she’s acting up. Personally, she’s more like diarrhea and that sort of comes into play right before she goes onstage as a doll in a box. Because if they aren’t picking their nose, they have to poop, and luckily she waits until about 10 seconds before going onstage to do just that.
Finally, we have two year old Logan and if history has taught us anything, two year olds don’t’ like to do dick. Logan is no different, not wanting to get her nails done, not wanting to wear her pageant dress, not wanting to walk pretty. Poinsettias fly in all directions as she chooses her outfit of choice time to run around like a bat outta hell instead of pageant girl. And her mother was worried about her eczema being an issue.
Did I mention the nose-picking? One scene was so awesome, I seriously vomited my morning coffee into the back of my throat. Pick-and-eat is just not my thing. You won’t see dogs and chickens do that, and I rest my single-income-no-kids lifestyle on that alone. Oh, and not sharing the remote with anyone. Full recap coming soon!