TV Patrol: @#$%&*! Thursday

Gordon Ramsey’s back for f*cking season #5 of Hell’s Kitchen on f*cking FOX at 9pm tonight. This season, he has 16 f*cking would-be chefs to abuse for our f*cking amusement. This year’s winner gets to run a f*cking restaurant, at a f*cking casino, in Atlantic City. Of course, each of the f*cking 16 has to make their ‘signature’ dish for Ramsey to spit f*cking out, which he does. He never f*cking disappoints me! With too many f*cking chefs for the kitchens, two are sent to the front to wait f*cking tables. This is a whole new way for Gordon to crush f*cking dreams. He can humiliate them in front of the f*cking customers. F*ckin’ A! I’m looking f*ching forward to it all.

American Idol at 8pm, on FOX, is wrapping up it’s auditons tonight. There will be auditions from New York & Puerto Rico. We will finally get to go to Hollywood. After tonight, one of the those going to California will be our next American Idol! Kudos to Kelly Clarkson for making her album #1 this week.

Mark Burnett is at it again. This time he’s taking on the rodeo scene. Tonight is the premiere of the Burnett produced Toughest Cowboy airing on SPIKETV at 11pm. Twelve cowboys follow the National Rodeo Tour & compete in bareback bronc riding, saddle bronc riding and bull riding – with the two lowest point-getters forced to go head-to-head in a bull riding duel to see who will be eliminated. The “toughest cowboy” wins the deed to a spectacular ranch in the Rocky Mountains of Wyoming. This is my kind of show. I will watch this one.

VH1 has the LIVE Pepsi Smash Super Bowl Bash at 9pm. It’s hosted by Jerry O’Connell & has the music of R&B’s Rihanna, Fall Out Boy, & Lifehouse. It’s being held in the host city of Tampa, Florida & the concert will pay tribute to the All-American sport of football and its 43rd Super Bowl. Product placement abounds, but someone has to pay for it all.

Celebrity Rehab: Sober House follows the Super Bowl Bash at 10pm, on VH1. This week, Steve, former drummer of Guns ‘N Roses, (fired in ’91) gets caught shooting heroin & is given the option of going to Las Encina Rehab or getting arrested. He gets arrested. The rest of the former substance abusers have made it to day 4, which means they can leave the house freely. Will any of them fall off the wagon like Steve?

Randy Jackson Presents: America’s Best Dance Crew on MTV at 10pm has the seven remaining crews choreographing dance routines inspired by Britney Spears. Oh lord! Are they going to dance like her? That’s about as energetic as the Energizer bunny without batteries.

There are new episodes of:

Private Practice on ABC at 10pm.
CSI & Eleventh Hour on CBS at 9 & 10pm.
Smallville & Supernatural on CW at 8 & 9pm.
The Beast on A&E at 10pm.
Burn Notice on USA at 10pm.

There are a few good movies on tonight.

TMC has the Academy Award winning Annie Hall (1977) at 8pm, with Diane Keaton & Woody Allen.

If you want to get in the football mood for the SuperBowl, AMC is airing Rudy (1993) with Sean Astin.

That’s about it for tonight. Don’t forget, Survivor starts in 2 weeks! Did you watch LOST last night? Wasn’t it great. They give us little tidbits for answers & leave us with more questions! If you want to talk about it, call in tonight at 7pm for TVGasm’s radio show with Greybishop & Flipit. Here’s more info on just how to do that.

Maybe I’ll chat with you tonight…..

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chooch