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Friday, March 3, 2006
4:50 pm
50 Comments
Alright, you know the drill: we’re at 20 semi-finalists, working our way to the Top 12, and that is way too much TV to deal with in this one little space. So I get one hour–ONE HOUR–to write as much as I can about this week’s Idol sing-offs, and I do it all from memory. So only the stuff I remember gets included.
And I have lots to get off my chest this week. So I’m typing fast. Here we go. Start the clock! (click!)First of all, some things I missed from last week:
1) Stevie Scott will be a Judge’s Wild Card pick. At least I hope. She deserves to go on the Idol tour. Maybe Eeyore too. But definitely Stevie.
2) Whoever left a comment saying Elliot reminds you of Alf: please never leave comments like that again. Because now, every time I see Elliot, I think “Alf.” And then he sings, and I think “Look, Alf is singing.” Now I have Alf on the brain, and I’d rather not have him there. It’s not Elliot’s fault his parents didn’t get him braces. And I mean that in the nicest possible way. Let’s all hope Elliot doesn’t read this, because I think he’s great and I’d hate to hurt his feelings. Do you think Elliot would know that I lauged out loud when I read the Alf reference? And while we’re on the subject, why isn’t Alf on Nick At Nite?
3) I’ve been spelling Miss McPhee’s name incorrectly all this time. It’s Katharine, not Katherine. Sorry, K-Phee. For the record: I have no idea if I’m spelling Elliot’s name correctly but I don’t have enough time to go check.
4) Why is Paula’s doctor (alledgedly) still writing prescriptions? I don’t understand why it’s legal to give someone pills to the point that they make no sense. Drug companies pay politicians lots of money, I guess.
~~~
This week:
…speaking of Lady Abdul: After Simon called her out for “being annoying” (read: “high on pills again”) during the girls’ Tuesday sing-off, Paula jumped on her Huffy bike and switched chairs with Randy–which put her in position to comment first. And she mysteriously pulled it together. She was articulate, insightful, and blunt. No more “Your light shines from within” crap. I loved it. She needs to go first from now on, so she doesn’t feel pressure to be nice. Who knew that would make such a huge difference?
Although on Thursday’s results show (alledgedly) she was just totally wasted or something. But that’s good. Booze is better than pills. It’s an easier withdrawl process when you’re in Betty Ford. Pills are a nasty habit to kick, stay away from them.
Anyway–
First up: Katharine McPhee–”All In Love Is Fair”
She has the most electrifying control over her voice, she packs power into even the softest, bluesiest notes. And she’s gorgeous. Apparently she saw Ace’s performance last week with the brooding stares and thought I can do that. ‘Cause K-Phee was all over that camera lens. The judges didn’t like her song, and I don’t understand why. I loved it. Although she’s worked the piano-bar standards thing for all it’s worth; time to do something new. Can she sing more upbeat songs? We’ll see. What a shame if she was a one-trick pony. But it’s a good trick nonetheless.
Kinnik Skye–”Here For The Party” (or something like that)
Kinnik…how do I say this politely?…There is this gay club here in Austin called Charlie’s, where all these black queens dress in drag and prance around on stage, and make crazy facial expressions while they shriek and scream and lip sync songs. They’re interesting to watch, simply because they are such spectacles. Do you get where I’m going with this?…Kinnik, the weird clothes, the screaming of the songs for no reason…if you did your performance at a drag pageant, everyone would believe you were one of those queens. Because this week, you looked like a dude.
I’m just sayin’.
Lisa Tucker–”Who’s Loving You”
Great voice. Cute girl. High school talent show. Otherwise knows as “The Next Jasmine Trias.” NEXT–
Melissa McGhee–”Why Haven’t I Heard From You”
She looked good this week–hair away from her face, moderate makeup, cute outfit. And her song? Fantastic…technically speaking. Her voice is perfect for recording; close your eyes and listen, she’s lovely. But for a while, I couldn’t put my finger on why she’s not “connecting.” It’s no fun watching her perform. Perhaps it’s the fact that she always, always has this halfway, non-committal smile on her face that isn’t the slightest bit exciting. It’s not even a real smile. It’s just there, looking unobtrusive and agreeable in a passive way. She needs to laugh more, or stop smiling entirely, or something.
And then when she finished singing, Idol went to commercial break, and an ad came on for that movie starring Amanda Byrnes. And then it hit me. Melissa looks exactly like Amanda Byrnes. And Amanda Byrnes could, quite possibly, be the most boring actress on the planet. Not good. Melissa really, really needs to go back to blonde.
Heather Cox–”Hero”
Oh please. I’m sending her my cleaning bill, for making me barf all over my couch. “Hero?” NEXT–
Brenna Gethers–”Last Dance”
Cheshire Cat. Be gone.
Paris Bennett–”Wind Beneath My Wings”
This week, Paris sang just to hear the sound of her voice. And she wanted to make sure she was loud enough for her voice to come out of TVs that weren’t even tuned to Fox, so everyone in America could hear her voice too. I can imagine all the morons watching According To Jim being very confused by the sound of Paris Bennett coming out of their speakers while Jim Belushi was on screen. But I imagine the Jim Belushi crowd is easily confused anyway.
Okay, we get it, she can blow out all the windows in the building. Every Baptist church south of the Mason-Dixon line has a choir filled with women who can do the same thing. But when Mandisa and Chris Daughtry do it, the result is electrifying; when Paris does it, she’s just loud. Last week, without hitting a single “power note,” she put on a show, and was much better. Don’t get me wrong, this week she was alright…but I greatly prefer melodic Paris over power-note Paris.
Oh, Lord, I’m falling behind. Need to speed it up:
Kellie Pickler–”Let’s Give Them Something To Talk About”
Unique, back on pitch, and her throaty-squeaky vocals sounded great. Her performance was fun. And the fact that she’s not “powerful” doesn’t mean she’s not good. Because she really is. Now I remember why I love Kellie Pickler. She’s a star. And she wins Perfect Song Choice for the night, as well as Best Performance.
Mandisa–”Cry”
I hate this song even when Faith Hill sings it; I much prefer “Breathe,” as Faith Hill power-ballads go. The rhythms of the “Cry” three-count beat are really weird for some reason. So I wasn’t a fan of this performance, by default. But again, by singing country, Mandisa is shaking things up and showing her versatility, proving she can do anything. She’s so smart. Granted, she keeps singing sharp, and her vibrato gets out of control sometimes–but when she’s on, hitting those notes, she is IT. Her vocal tone can slice through steel. So fierce.
Oh damn, I forgot Ayla–
Ayla Brown–”I Want You To Need Me”
Here’s the thing with Ayla: she is a great singer. The sight of her standing there in that dress, looking like she was attacked by a Mary Kay commando, was a joke. She’s hot, but she needs to come out in some old jeans, a t-shirt, and some sneakers, with her hair in a ponytail, and she needs to sing some angry, fun song like the big lesbian tomboy that she is. The judges keep saying she’s so “mechanical,” and they can’t figure out why; it’s because she’s not being real. We don’t want her to be girly. We already have Ryan Seacrest Kellie Pickler for that. If she would be natural and butch it up a bit, at least she’s be original. And maybe I wouldn’t forget her.
~~
On to Wednesday, with the dudes:
Taylor Hicks: “Easy” (or is it “Easy Like Sunday Morning”?)
Started great. Then he started going “Whoo!” after every stanza like he was in a bar doing Jaeger Bombs with his buddies. He needs to just sing and quit the rest of the crap. He’s turning into a characiture of himself. Whoopee, people think you’re weird and that’s cool, blah blah blah. Now quit with the Tourette’s Syndrome ticks and just sing, dude.
Elliot Yamin–
What was the name of his song? He said it too fast. Whatever, I know it was something by Stevie Wonder and Elliot sang it GREAT. Singing the ups-and-downs of Stevie Wonder R&B/jazz could be a nightmare of mush-mouth sloppiness, if you don’t keep every single note in key. Usually when singers do “runs,” it’s to hide the fact that they can’t hit and sustain the correct note. But Elliot can. He can hit every note you throw at him. Where was this guy during the audition episodes? I think they didn’t put him in because he looks funny. And that’s a shame. Damn, he’s good.
Ace–”If I’m Not Made For You”
Okay, I’m going to say it: Ace crashed and burned. It makes my fingers feel pain just typing it. Daniel Bettingfield sings this song with the aid of a computer tuning his voice; Ace needed that computer, as he trudged through his vocals like he was walking through mud. Really badly-tuned, off-key mud. And the judges liked it, which I didn’t get. Awful awful awful. He’s lucky he’s foxy.
Gedeon McKinney–”A Change Is Gonna Come”
Gedeon is great. Forty years ago, he would have been a hit. Today, would you buy his album filled with Motown and gospel-wannabe songs? Exactly. God bless.
Kevin Covais–”I Heard It Through The Grapevine”
In his intro video clip, he excitedly detailed all the Clay Aiken-style female attention he’s been getting, exclaiming “It’s kind of like I’m a sex symbol now!” Kev, when girls say you’re “cute,” they mean it like it’s “cute” when a Chihuahua barks at the neighbor’s Rottweiler. It’s funny. It’s endearing. And it’s delusional. Josh Groban! Josh Groban! Sing Josh Groban!
Sway–”Overjoyed”
He tried to go totally straight and legit this time, after his shenanagins last week. Big mistake, since we don’t care about Sway unless he’s blinging and pimping us all to death. And singing a Stevie Wonder song on the same night that Elliot is singing Stevie Wonder is the fastest way out of the competition. Oops.
Will Makar–”Lady”
We respected Will. And then he said “I got to meet Justin Guarini!” like he was excited about it. Oh, dear. For me, he might as well have come out on the stage and taken a huge dump. Because now all I see is the the male Heather Cox.
And the Ryan Seacrest turned into Chester the Molester and started rearranging Will’s twig and berries, saying something about “you need to untuck your shirt” or one of those standard porn movie excuses to get into somebody’s pants. And I forgot all about Will’s singing, and his naiveté, and his lack of any sort of musical sophistication, and I just felt dirty. It was all just a bad moment for me. And for America.
Bucky Covington–”And The Thunder Rolls”
I didn’t care about Bucky until halfway through his song, when he flipped a switch somewhere in his vocal cords and started using his grunge voice again. And it worked! This whole “grunge-country” thing he’s got going is original, it’s fun to listen to, and it’s the only thing that makes him unique. Well that, and his bad ponytail, but maybe that’s how people wear their hair wherever they’re from. Whatever–he needs to stick with it. Think about it. This whole thing with Bucky kicks ass. It’s like when metal bands sing pop songs. I love it. And he better do SOMETHING, because otherwise, compared to Chris Daughtry, he’s toast. But I’m not at Chris yet, I need to keep control of myself. Deep breaths.
David Radford–”The Way You Look Tonight”
David, say it with me: “Thank you, ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to Las Vegas! Be sure to tip your waitress!” NEXT–
Chris Daughtry–”Hemmorhage”
Holy shit.
Now that I’m here, I don’t know what else to say.
Never mind the fact that Chris Daughtry is the worst thing to happen to Rogaine, ever. Listening to him sing causes a visceral reaction within my person. I feel like a teenage girl watching The Beatles perform on The Ed Sullivan Show. And I take great satisfaction in remembering how Simon gave him a “no” in his initial audition. Yet Simon keeps referring to his judging skills as a “10.” Ha.
Not that I’m saying Chris Daughtry is a musical genius like The Beatles. We don’t know what he’s all about yet. Just as with Katharine McPhee, I’m interested to see if Chris can do anything other than this rocker thing. But who cares?! He’s so exciting and raw, at least you want to see what he can do. And that’s the biggest compliment he can get. More, more, scream at us more, please.
Mandisa is the only vocalist who has the power of Chris, and she tries to pull it off, but she sings off-key once in a while. And I don’t fault her for it, because wailing like that, while making it sound like actual music, is the hardest singing to do. At least Mandisa has the chops to give it a shot. Chris, however, has the chops to nail it. I want to shave my head and scream into a microphone and be Chris Daughtry when I grow up.
The judges said his was the only male performance to stick out; I say Elliot’s was also excellent, so that’s not a fair statement. For the guys, it’s a race between Elliot and Chris. And Kevin. Just kidding. If you don’t watch Idol, please do so just to watch Chris sing.
~~
I’m totally out of time, so I’ll make this quick: David Radford and Sway got the axe from the menfolk, and Heather Cox and Brenna Gethers were kicked out of the ladies. Kinnik Skye and Kevin Covais were next in line. Any questions? No? Of course not. See you next week when we say goodbye to Kinnik and Kevin for good.
50 Comments
Was it just me, or was anyone else put off by Paris’ smug “I’ve got the favor” comment to Ryan when asked if she was going to nail her performance? I’m sure Jesus is really into American Idol. It’s not like he has anything else to worry about.
Go Mandisa!
OK, so Paula was hammered last night. The girl couldn’t even sit up straight.
And I am SO very glad that Brenna is gone. In an open plea to all involved in television. PLEASE, do not return her calls. Do not allow her to ever again appear on my tv. Thank you.
Why does no one else dislike Chris like I do? Hey, Mr. Clean, TONE IT THE FUCK DOWN, DUDE! I muted your performance and you still ruptured an eardrum. I demand you pay for the medical bills. Just take it out of your other man’s kids’ college fund. You can’t sing rock songs every week. You have to be versatile n shit. You’re just the louder version of David Radford, except you can actually sing a tiny bit. I can’t wait for them to get a weird week like, “Cabaret of 1972″ just to watch him fail miserably because he can’t make my ears bleed to a torch song.
one correction: it’s daniel bedingfield, not bettingfield (i wouldn’t be able to pick him out of a police line-up, but i’ve read his name before).
anyways, ding dong, the witch is dead. and can you believe how utterly gauche and tacky she was, making the “money” sign and actually changing the lyrics of the song to “let’s make some money”?! i nearly shot up my tv, Elvis-style (if i had a gun)
as for Paula–no. just no. i was so horrified. those poor kids are standing up there, awaiting their fate, and you can’t fucking wait until the show’s over to take a fistful of percocet? she should be fired. pronto.
“Your light shines from within”
i love it!!
She was high as a kite. And those waxed eyebrows!
Let me tell you what’s wrong with the world today. I work hard Mon-Fri 9-5, and I look forward to coming home to watch American Idol. By far the best television show on TV! Now, with that said, I’m relaxin, chillin, watching American Idol, and I’m looking at this fool Paula Abdul! Now this female only had a 1 hour shift on Thursday Night, a 1 hour shift that she get’s paid millions to do, and she still has the nerve to show up drunk and drugged up on the job. I’m telling you I love this show, and I firmly believe that her being booted would only make me love the show more. Paula, do us all a favor, take your pill-poppin, corey clark humpin, drunk ass, back to the unemployment line.
Brenna, Buh Bye. It was painful everytime there was a camera in front of you, But we all survived it. Here are some parting words, America does not love you. America hates you. The only album, you’ll be making is from the pics,of your short short Idol journey. Bling Bling, and Shine On! (ass slap)
I always thought the name of that Daniel Bedingfield song was “If You’re Not the One.” I checked my CD and iTunes and that is how they have it listed but they kept calling it “If I’m Not Made For You” on AI and that is how it is listed on the AI website. Why the name change?
I keep hoping they will have a “Prison Break” ad/promo after Kelli Pickler performs.
Dan, your recaps are great. Wasn’t a fan at first but you have won me over.
Perfect screen grab of Taylor. Ugh.
To me, Paris looked like Dee from What’s Happening!!
Prison Break comment is heartless – It shouldn’t reflect on Kelly at all!
I can’t stop laughing at the Alf picture. The right people were voted off-that is THE most important thing.
I don’t like Paris. I think she is becoming very cocky. Yeah she can sing- but that attitude. I’m no fan of hers.
What was she rambling about that she has style “because {she} wears different outfits everyday.” Yeah, it’s called changing your clothes. Clever. You really pulled the wool over our eyes, Paris.
“I got to meet Justin Guarini!”
Don’t get too excited, Will. It’s really not that big of a deal. Thousands of people get to meet Justin everyday at their local Walmart checkout counter.
And yes, SaveFerris(#7), your Prison Break comment is heartless… but I like it, heh.
Good lord… how on earth could you have liked Kellie’s performance and even think she sounds good??
Her singing voice is SO freakin whiney. It grates on my last nerve.
And although I do like Katharine’s voice.. she did freaking horrible this last time.
She just didn’t sound good at all.
Anywho uhm… other than that… agree with your assessment of everyone else
heh
*waves her Go Elliot and Chris flag*
Chris D. makes the hole all squishy, in a good way.
I can’t believe that Sway was thrown off and the chicken little clay gayken wannabe is still there. His eyes are so close together, I think he is a cyclops from the Lost In Space TV show.
Paula Abdul is a pathetic train wreck. Anyone see her on that bloated windbag’s (Dr. Phil) TV self help prime time bullshit show? I could not stop laughing at her and her poor me attitude. Better than any episode of Seinfeld or Friends, for sure.
KH
I love the boys a lot more than the girls… It’s too bad it has to be 6 and 6 when really it should be 4 and 8! Loved the recap, you had me crackin up, but don’t mess with my boy T Hicks! I love him! He’s def gonna be in the top 6. People at work think I’m weird for having a 5×7 photo of him in my cube!
You don’t even understand how happy I was to see Brenna leave. She brought it on herself. If she thought all that attitude was going to get America to like her, someone advised her wrong.
Now I remember why I love Kellie Pickler. She’s a star.
yeah, she’s a star. a porn-star. ms. pickler certainly tickles my pickle, and that ‘aw shucks,’ ellie-may clampett act is surely inspiring the fantasy lives of blossoming masturbation fanatics all across america, so i won’t be surprised if she goes deep in the competition, but her singing is totally mediocre.
Okay, I’m going to say it: Ace crashed and burned.
i’m glad somebody said it. the hair, the cheek-bones, and the ‘f**k me’ eyes could carry him all the way, but ace does not have the chops to be going after those high notes, and that whole ‘lucky beanie’ thing made me throw up in my mouth. simon takes it easy on this guy because he knows that ace=millions of pairs of wet teeny-bopper panties=$$$$ for simon, but that performance SUCKED.
Elliot sang it GREAT . . . (but) he looks funny. And that’s a shame. Damn, he’s good.
–too true. it’s going to suck when elliot gets cut before poseurs like ace or (god forbid) nerd-loving-grandmother favorite kevin, but a blue-eyed soul singer who looks like frankenstein’s monster is not really teen pop idol material. i fear he will be cut far earlier than he deserves.
This whole “grunge-country” thing he’s got going is original.
original? have you never heard of lynyrd skynyrd? really–bucky is just a slightly-above-average version of every redneck who’s ever jumped up to belt out ‘freebird’ on karaoke night at the pool hall after one too many bush light drafts and trips to the bathroom to snort crank. america, please send bucky and his bad hair and soggy-cocoa-puffs moustache back to the trailer park ASAP.
Listening to him sing causes a visceral reaction within my person. I feel like a teenage girl watching The Beatles perform on The Ed Sullivan Show.
get help, dude. seriously. pronto.
really, i dig chris. he busted some ‘jovi last week, his back-story makes him seem like a stand-up guy, he’s got that whole bruce willis-cue ball thing going on, and, in the ocean of melisma and preening that is american idol, he’s not afraid to bring a little balls to the table. but comparing anything on AI to the beatles is sort of like saying ‘that FDR sure could have learned a thing or two about diplomacy from dubya.’
oh, and by the way–paula on drugs is half of what makes this circus worth watching (the other half is the spectacle of watching these poor kids try to play it cool after simon compares them to transvestites or sideshow freaks). keep poppin’ those pills, paula! that’s why we love you!
The one time my family gets all together is American Idol. (It’s sad, really.)
I really like Mandisa. Who cares if she has a few vocal problems at times? She can blow everyone’s ass away, no matter what she’s singing.
My mother loves Bucky, but it makes no sense to me. I’m sick of him on first glance. He makes me think, ‘Just take a shower, already!’
My mother also loves Taylor Hicks. I can’t stand him. His tics annoy the hell out of me. Just take your medicine already.
Paris was kind of off… I loved her last week with her singing and dancing. I hope she goes back to that.
I love Kevin. He’s so… I don’t know… mouse-like. Everyone *does* want to pinch his cheeks.
I don’t know what to think about Ayla. I feel sorry for her because of her parents… she’s probably stressed out a lot of the time because her parents want her to do the best. I agree that her voice sounds kind of odd… like it’s robotic.
Melissa is from my city. I think she lives kind of close to me, but I’m not sure. I like her for some reason.
I don’t really like Will’s voice, but if the adoring pre-teens want to vote for him…
I thought it was really funny how Ryan tried to adjust his shirt. I was coming into the room from the kitchen and I saw that… I was just like, “What the hell?” I bet we will find a Ryan Seacrest porn tape in a few years (when his career goes even more steeply downhill).
I loved how bad Paula was this week. It was great. I love how this family show is teaching people that if you can make a lot of money by being high.
To not love Chris is to accept the bubblegum pop bullshit that this show endorses as good music. I can’t have another AI whose album I will not buy, and Kelly Clarkson only became hot when she broke away from her contract.
Chris is my boy all the way to the end, talent does not go unnoticed and humility goes a long way with America. And poor Taylor needs to take something for the Torretts, it’s getting so annoying with all the “Whoo’s!”
Elliott actually sang “Moody’s Mood for Love” by James Moody, not another Stevie Wonder song. I’m sure no one really cares, but just so you know.
So glad that Sinatra boy and Brenna went home this week. Does that girl ever stop posing? And why are her teeth so pointy?
While I’m not taking anything away from Mandisa (I think she’s great), you really can’t say that she branched out and “showed her versatility” this week. Faith Hill hasn’t been country for quite some time now, and “Cry” was originally sung by non-country group, whose name escapes me now. Having said that, Mandisa did a great job and deserves to go on to one of the top spots.
Paula jumped on her Huffy bike…love it! And yes she was definately on something Thursday night!!
I really wanted Brenna to be voted off the show at about 8:59 pm, when the credits start to roll and the idol theme music plays. Wouldn’t that have been perfect? I was just really hoping that she wouldn’t have had the final 2 minutes of “fame”. She should have been singing some skanky Lil Kim songs. That would have been a better fit than any real diva.
I felt so sorry for poor little Will when Seacrest molested him on national television. I think his mom should have rushed the stageand kicked his ass. Love Will like I love the Geiko lizard, and I wouldn’t like to see Ryan getting all touchy with him either.
Ace-PLEASE STOP IT!!! I actually thought that he had some talent, but the Constantine inpersonations are absolutely inexcusable. Yuck..
Heather Cox is a spitting image of Fez’s insane girlfriend Caroline. I was really hoping for an freak out/meltdown when she was voted off.
Bucky sounds like he has a mouth full of gravel at all times.
I really like Chris, he is one of my favs, but I don’t like the idea of him touring with the idols. He seems legit, and the whole choreographed ‘Kids Incorporated’ type performance just doesn’t suit him.
What about Paula slurring something to the bottom 2 girls about ‘one ate a salad and the other had pizza’, and then laughing maniacally? Such a lush.
One more thing-
Please never compare Lisa Tucker to Jasmine Trias again. Ever. She can actually sing, rather than wear gimmick flowers in her hair and exploit Hawaii.
Elliot (who I love, by the way) does not look like Alf. He looks like the GoatBoy character Jim Breuer played on Saturday Night Live. Seriously. Do a side-by-side, add some hair . . . voila!
Go, Taylor and Chris!!!!
I’m also not a huge fan of Paris or Lisa ( I like Katherine and Mandisa). The young girls and guys (like Will) need to choose more contemporary songs. Simon was spot on with that comment. I didn’t think Kellie was a great as everyone else though she was this week. That song was too low for her and she strained on the high notes, but she is cute and will probably make the top 12. Kevin is my dark horse for top 12 b/c I love him and I think he can sing well. Not as well as my faves Chris/Elliot/Taylor/Ace, but he can sing ON KEY and he’s just cute!
Seem to have some Paris haters here. I promise you she will win this show. Watch and learn people – watch and learn.
I promise you she won’t Milkshake. A guy will win this year. The only girl that can is Katherine. If I knew you, I’d make a bet on it!
I’m not questioning Paris’ talent. The girl can sing. I’m bummed that the humility and genuine excitment she expressed when she made it to Hollywood seems to be replaced by a holier than thou sense of entitlement. (It was like she was channeling Ma Weaver from The Amazing Race). I bet even the Almighty is rooting for Kellie Pickler.
Chris’ performance was the best of the men, but didn’t like the song choice. I’m so over Creed-type anything. But Taylor’s performance was better than last week’s.
These things have been really bothering me about American Idol:
1. Paula’s and Randy’s ambivalance about what they are looking for in a winner. One moment they are saying things like “that was too safe” “you’ve got to make it your own” “similar to last week” “stretch yourself” “show us what you got” etc. Next moment they are saying “stick with what you’re good at”, “that was soooo not your style”, blah, blah, blah. They seem to make these comments randomly, alternating suggestions from show to show.
2. Simon’s donning of clingy, black, short sleeved sweaters. These look atrocious. They serve only to accentuate his lack of tone and budding man breasts. Please Simon, the white t-shirt is ok. An oxford shirt would be fine. Even a trench coat or a large swath of burlap. But enough with the ugly ass knitwear.
3. Country music. This is just general disdain on my part, but it so infects the Idol I must mention it. All music engineered and marketed for mass consumption is pretty awful (yes, that is the point of Idol, but let’s forget about that for a moment). But somehow the twang, the bathos soaked lyrics, the jingoism, among other things, makes it more than I can stand.
At any rate…
Sway was more palatable this week than ever before. Oh well.
Good riddance to bad Sinatra.
Heather Cox, yawn. She looked like a low rent Jenny McCarthy. Did I need to mention that that’s low?
Brenna, everyone thinks you’re an asshole. Even Jesus.
The only one I really like this year is Chris…although Ace is good to look at…LOL…
Everyone else is quite boring.
I just love little Kevin. He’s not the greatest singer, but he’s just so CUTE!! And sorry Kevin, that doesn’t make you a sex symbol. I also love Elliott, Taylor and Chris. And of the girls I like Katharine and Ayla. Everyone seems to think that Ayla is so snotty and blah, but I’ve liked her from the beginning. Paris is okay I suppose. I mean, she has a great voice, but her attitude is beginning to annoy me. I also like Kellie Pickler, but I don’t think she’ll win. Oh, and Mandisa rocks!!
The ones that I HOPE will be in the top 12 are (not the ones that necessarily will be):
Katharine
Ayla
Paris
Mandisa
Kellie
Lisa
Elliott
Taylor
Chris
Kevin
Gedeon
Will
Note: I cannot vote, as I live in Canada, so Americans out there who agree with me, VOTE FOR KEVIN!!! And Elliott and Chris and Taylor and Ayla and Katharine and Mandisa, but I think that Kevin will need the most votes.
I totally agree with Kelley (#23)…..Jasmin couldn’t sing an entire song on pitch, Lisa is incredibly talented. Please no more comparisons!
I still am a bit in love with Will, even though he talks about being 12 when the first season was on (I was 20!!!). I’m sure to his young ears Justin did sound good. Hopefully he’ll realize now that Justin actually sucks.
And I still hate that they have the eliminated people sing their last song again after being kicked off. Usually that song was the reason they’re leaving. They should pick a better song to sing, leave on a high note!
Thank you KateMcV. That was the part of the rant I forgot. The singing of the loser song. “I’ve just been humiliated on national television. In front of my mother. Please continue to twist the knife that is piercing my heart RIGHT NOW.” One more bit of hate- I can not stand it when the potential Idols are standing with Babbling Seacrest and they hold up their fingers to indicate what number you should call. Some of them even make a telephone with thumb and pinky. This is aggravating. I vow to never vote for anyone who does the number fingers or the thumb-pinky phone.
“1) Stevie Scott will be a Judge’s Wild Card pick. At least I hope. She deserves to go on the Idol tour. Maybe Eeyore too. But definitely Stevie.”
I thought they got rid of the Wild Card process last year. Am I wrong? Are they bringing it back?
I will vote for Kevin for you georgia.
Elliot looks more like GoatBoy from SNL than ALF, to me. And my sister. And, I mean that in a pretty nice way too. Well, actually, I guess there is no way to mean it.. I really like him. But he still looks like GoatBoy.
That “Jesus Take the Wheel” song by Carrie Underwood was absolutely the most gag-inducing, cheesball shit I have heard in years. I hope she wrote the lyrics herself, because at least that’s a little better than actually having paid someone else for such pablum. I agree that having to sit through the losers’ song renditions can be painful (moreso for the audience than the performers), but even the people who suck usually sound better when the pressure is off. When it gets to the point when good people are actually getting voted off it does give them a nice final moment. Go Chris! He is the only Idol contestant in 4 seasons that I could actually see wanting to buy his CD. By the way, Chris’s voice would be perfect to sing a song from the band Live. If he ever did “I Alone” he would bring down the house.
Elliot doesn’t look like Alf. Elliot looks like Michael J. Fox in Teen Wolf when he is in transition to the wolf.
I believe it’s “If You’re Not the One” by Daniel Bedingfield. I didn’t get a chance to see the show, so I’m not certain that that is the song you’re talking about….
Great recap Papi!
Oh yes, Paula did seem to do better being first. I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who noticed. Maybe it’s because she wasn’t distracted by Simon sitting next to her and she could actually concentrate on feedback, not what it’d be like to have his hairy arms around her. Whatever it was, it worked; they should make it a permanent move.
Well thanks a lot for posting the Alf and Elliot sidebyside pics. Did you want the rest of us to only see Alf when he comes on from now on too? That was hysterical.
Elliot was awesome. Man, he can do Stevie Wonder. His background story got me alittle chocked up.
I liked Sway this week. Yeah, too bad his Stevie W. didn’t measure up to Elliot’s. Too bad.
Oh I forgot about Judge’s Choice. Oh no please, not Stevie! Lizardqueen posted about her mushed up mouth faces and I didn’t comment as I figured, oh she’s gone. But so help us all if there is any chance we will have to see her “I did opera, I can sing pop better than you and if I can’t I can mush up my mouth.”
I thought the Chicken Little picture was mean. Just mean. It’s one thing to post it on a site for us to all laugh and get snarky over but it’s another to do it on live national television to some poor guy who better be using his one opportunity to get some action before his 15 minutes are up. Poor Kevin.
I loved Mandisa! I thought she was awesome and good for her to take chances on songs. But if she would please not take a chance on sleeveless tops. (I say that with love though, I really do.)
Ace was ok. He got that high note (anyone else holding your breath to see if he would?) but the beanie bit was just cheesy as all get out.
Heather Cox- there’s a reason why no one else sang “Hero” on AI before.
Brenna- not giving that girl any more attention she does not deserve. Glad she is gone!
Paris- I was a fan after seeing her audition. Slowly changing my mind. Maybe next week she’ll be better.
Chris- amazing. Rumor out that Fuel wants him as their lead singer. He’d of been great.
The local Fox station here in NYC went to Kevin’s high school in Levittown, Long Island to do a story about his 15 y/o girlfriend and how she is handling Kevin’s newfound fame. They are in drama club together, and she actually beat him in their school talent show. They had her sing a few bars and she kicked his ass. So just let it be known that a kid who isn’t even the best singer in his high school has somehow cracked the top 20 on Idol.
Chris, Taylor, Elliot — my top 3 for the guys (Taylor had been 1st, but Chris really WOWED me this week!)
Bucky and Gideon surprised me this week. Big props!
I feel a guy will win this year… having said that. The girls:
Paris – blech! Ego has taken over — ‘ya know I used to lover her, but that’s all over now’ (heh, heh, working in the beatles!)
Thank God Brenna is gone! (loved the Jesus hates her comment! HA!)
Ayla – girl, you surprised me! I think she’ll continue to improve and I’m excited about that…
Kellie – hmm. Better than the week before, ‘but’. I’ve got my fingers crossed for her due the the likeablity factor.
Katharine – dissappointed me… I think she’ll do better this week.
Mandisa — Love you!
Lisa Tucker – like you a lot!
Melissa – liking you more…
Dan – excellent recap!
Whatever Paula was on, she should bottle it and sell it on late night info-mercials. I wish I could have at least heard her ridiculous analogies so I could quote them, but I did think her point was to taunt Simon. Ace could be a poser–he should have nailed that song–though he may have been worried about that high note . . . watch again–even worse the second time. Love, love, love Elliott–his voice is like silk perfection, and all you Alf-ers, just close your eyes–if he doesn’t win, please make it to the top, I can’t get enough of his singing, though I hope he does a more current song next time.
I was glad Kellie was much improved. I still like Paris. Love Mandisa, but hate”Cry” no matter who sings it.
Must say, I had the biggest laugh watching the contestants do the “Ace” stare–Will did it, affectively, I thought, for a kid, but when Bucky did, I had to howl, not that he didn’t do it well (all do it better than blank-eye Ace for me) but it’s so not what you would expect.
This will be an interesting week . . . note to Kevin (who is adorable to me too) remember to stay humble!!!! Perhaps Katharine and Paris too, guess we’ll see . . .
I have never understood the fascination with Taylor. Eww! Not liking him.
Chris has the kind of sultry down-to-earth rock voice and persona that just says natural star to me. I love this guy! It is easy to see him rockin’ it.
Mandisa’s got that Aretha Franklin vibe. Me no likey so much.
Paris – You had me at the first audition. You lost me with the deserving attitude.
No one else is really worth mentioning, cause no one else is that memorable.
Ok I really think that Kinnik looks like a Black version of Angelina Jolie. Also, Gideon looks like that Cuban Stand up comic that Fred Armisted plays on SNL. Anybody with me on that?
littledarling, you’ve got my #–I’ve been saying that about Kinnik since her first singing, and that can’t be an insult!!!!
don’t know the other one, but speaking of being full of oneself, I’m not sure anyone’s more cocky than Gedeon, esp when he first made the cut, but we’ll see . . .
i swear to god if pickler makes it to the top twelve i will have to claw my eyes out and stab my ears with pens repeatadly
there is no ‘likeability factor’ there for me and i really just dont see it…her vocals are horrendous and its pretty sad thats just cuz she is a cute girl people will keep her in….if a not so good looking person who wasnt trying so hard to be all cute had a voice like hers they would be out a long time ago
lauren: Be prepared to claw your eyes out. I find it hard to believe that someone as naive as she seems to be would bleach their hair-reminds me of Kelly Bundy/Christina Applegate-and you know what she was.
thanks “buttercup” (see above) for pointing out what’s been driving me nuts on this and many other sites. elliott himself correctly introduced his song “moody’s mood” as being by james moody (suprising for these kids)
the song was written before stevie wonder was born and i can find no evidence of his every having sung it.
it was PAULA for god’s sake who identified it as a stevie song … what have we come to when we are getting our information from her ?!