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The Winter Season of television is upon us. Here is a list of New & Returning Shows for the week of Jan. 3-9. I am so ready to watch something new & worth watching. This past month has been pure torture!Sunday, Jan. 3rd:
Secrets of Aspen premieres on VH1 at 10pm. The show follows six single girls whoring around at the famous ski resort town. Knowing VH1, this will be trashy, nasty fun… YAY!
Worst Cooks in America premieres on FOOD Network at 10pm. Twenty-four of the worst (my sister?) cooks compete for a chance to get a 10-day crash couse in cooking. They will show their skills, or lack of, at a fancy culinary school with real chefs. Only 12 move on, with one person winning $25,000 in the end.
Guiliana & Bill start their 2nd season on STYLE at 9pm. The couple get stuck babysitting & preparing for a red-carpet event at the same time. Hilarity(?) ensues!
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Desperate Housewives & Brothers & Sisters return with all-new episodes on ABC.
All new episodes of The Simpsons, The Cleveland Show, Family Guy & American Dad air on FOX.
The last Sunday Night Football airs at 8pm with the Bengals at the NY Jets.
Monday, Jan. 4th:
The Bachelor: On the Wings of Love premieres it’s 14th season at 8pm, on ABC. Hard to believe this sappy show is still going strong. Pilot Jake Pavelka, who was dumped by Jillian on The Bachelorette, has 25 wannabe girlfriends to choose from. Oh, by the way, Jillian is there, with the dude she DID pick over Jake, to help him weed out the dead weight. Ten must go!!
Conveyor Belt of Love premieres at 10pm on ABC. Now stick with me here… the concept is this… Five girls check out 30 dudes coming down a conveyor belt. It stops for 60 seconds & these guys get to pitch their “qualifications”. If 2 girls pick the same tool, he gets to choose which one he likes. In the end, the five girls each get a guy. Did Ashton Kutcher have something to do with this show?
Antiques Roadshow also premieres its 14th season in Raleigh, NC, on PBS at 8pm.
The Secret Life of the American teenager & Make It or Break It return at 8 & 9pm on ABCFamily.
Heroes returns for a 2hr. episode at 8pm on NBC (it will air at it’s usual 9pm timeslot on Jan. 11th.)
FOX has the Fiesta Bowl with Boise State taking on TCU at 8pm.
The season finale of I Want to Work for Diddy airs at on VH1
Tuesday, Jan. 5th:
The Biggest Loser: Couple is back (already) for its 9th season premiere, at 8pm on NBC. There are 22 lardass-challenged family members this time around. Before they even leave town, the inhuman treatment begins. Producers humiliate them by making them weigh-in in front of their whole hometown! Let the torture begin.
Last Restaurant Standing starts its 3rd season on BBC-America at 9pm. Nine couple try out for their own restaurant.
Wild Recon & ManEaters both premiere on Animal Planet at 9 & 10pm. In the first, some dude named Schultz travels all over the world collecting DNA & blood sample from dangerous animals for research. The second show showcases sharks for its 1st episode.
Life After People starts its 2nd season on HISTORY at 10pm.
NCIS, NCIS:LA & The Good Wife all return with new episodes on CBS.
Wednesday, Jan. 6th:
Nip/Tuck premieres its 7th & final season on FX, at 10pm.
Ghost Hunters International premieres its 2nd season at 9pm, on SyFy.
I Get That A Lot returns at 8pm, on CBS. Paris Hilton, Julie Chen & Snoop Dogg try to fool people while doing ordinary jobs. I can see Julie & Snoop getting away with it, but Paris will never pull it off. She just can’t NOT be the dumbass that she is. Besides, she’s done this before hasn’t she?
The 36th Annual People’s Choice Awards on CBS at 9pm. Queen Latifah hosts. God, if Dexter doesn’t win, I will be writing a very stern letter to someone! If I was there, I’d even pull a Kanye.
ABC comedies return with new episodes of The Middle, Modern Family, Cougar Town & Ugly Betty This is Ugly Betty‘s first night in its new time slot. Maybe it won’t get cancelled if it does well here.
Mercy & Law & Order return with new episodes on NBC at 8 & 9pm.
Thursday, Jan. 7th:
Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew premieres its 3rd season at 10pm on VH1. The cast includes MacKenzie Phillips, Heidi Fleiss, Dennis Rodman, Tom Sizemore & 5 more “celebrities” who I don’t know. I will be watching this for one reason…DENNIS. He was such an entertaining, drunken trainwreck on Celebrity Apprentice. I’m sure Dr. Drew will have his hands full with him around. Good times!
For fans of NBC’s returning show Chuck, SyFy is running a marathon starting at 5pm & ending at 1am (Fri.) Chuck returns to NBC on Jan.10th with new episodes.
Friday, Jan. 8th:
What Not To Wear starts its 8th season at 9pm on TLC.
The Best Thing I Ever Ate premieres its 2nd season at 10pm on FOOD Network.
Ghost Whisperer, Medium & NUMB3RS all return with new episodes on CBS. Yes Flipit dear, Allison is back with her dysfunctional family. I will be glad to see it too.
Dollhouse is back at 9pm, on FOX. We will say goodbye to this show on Jan. 22nd. Joss Whedon promised closure & I hope it’s enough to satisfy us.
Saturday, Jan. 9th:
The NFL Wild Card Playoff Games on NBC.
So that’s it for the first week of the New Year. Lots more new stuff next week. My “Pick of the Week” is Secrets of Aspen on VH1. They never disappoint!