For what to watch tonight, check in with our TV Patrolwoman after the jump!
Project Runway all the way, bitches!
My viewing pleasures for Tuesday night were quite diverse. Can I start with: “I told ya so! I told ya so! I was right & I’m gonna gloat.” “Dancing with the Stars” did NOT bring back Kim Kardasshian. They just didn’t get rid of Rocco this week. His “meatballs” live to sweat another week. The LA News doesn’t know it’s ass from a hole in the ground.
I caught up with “Heroes”. WTF was that all about? ScarPeter took NowPeter to the future and Claire shot ScarPeter and killed him. NowPeter and ScarPeter end up in the morgue together and Now Peter picked a peck of pickled peppers. Where’s the peck of pickled peppers NowPeter picked?
That episode was almost as confusing as the Presidential Debates. Tom Brokaw asked direct questions and I listened intently to their answers and couldn’t figure out what the fuck they were talking about. I am even more undecided about who to vote for than I was before the debate, ScarPeter or NowPeter?
Let’s move on to more important things, the Wednesday night line-up.
“Pushing Daisies” at 8pm. (new episode) These people need to slow down. They talk so freakin’ fast, that I hafta turn on the closed caption option. I wish they’d spent more time with the dead people and I wish they had never revived those stupid bees.
“Private Practice” at 9pm. (new episode)
“Dirty Sexy Money” at 10pm. (new episode) I knew Mama Rich-Bitch killed Nate’s dad.
“New Adventures of Old Christine” at 8pm. (new episode) That’s got to be the longest show title ever. Why don’t they just cut it down to “Old Christine.”
“Gary Unmarried” at 8:30pm. (new episode) I know a guy like Gary. His name is Alan and he lives with his brother Charlie in Malibu.
“Criminal Minds” at 9pm. (new episode). I never watch this show, BUT, on Oct. 22nd, Wil Wheaton will guest star and I recommend everyone watch it that night.
“CSI: NY” at 10pm. (new episode) Someone is dead. This show maybe?
“Knight Rider” at 8pm. (new episode) Hasn’t NBC been playing this show all week? I can’t bring myself to watch it. If I want to watch a talking car, I’ll watch the original, “My Mother the Car!”
“Biggest Loser: Families” at 9pm. (new episode) The season premiere of “Deal or No Deal” was suppose to air in this time slot, but they chose to play it last Friday, when no one was watching, for some reason. I don’t know what they’re doing at this network. Maybe Tina Fey is doing the programming now. She does everything else. God Bless Ms. Fey.
“Lipstick Jungle” at 10pm. (new episode) Cheetah like red lipstick, it matches his ass.
“Bones” at 8pm. (new episode)
‘Til Death” at 9 & 9:30pm (both new episodes) I think I can say, without a doubt, that “Do Not Disturb” has been cancelled. It isn’t even listed on their web site under “Current FOX Shows”. I think it’s the winner of “First Show Cancelled” for the 2008 season.
“America’s Next Top Model” at 8pm. (new episode) We are down to 8 models and the previews guarantee a model melt-down. Doesn’t that happen every week?
“90210″at 9pm (encore presentation…. that’s what they say instead of ‘repeat’)
Ok, we have some random premieres on different networks at 10pm. I’ve got to make some hard decisions on which to record
Comedy Central has their season premiere of “South Park”. Check out Nads contest to win the new “Cult of Cartman” DVD. Details here in the Newsgasm.
TVLand is airing their season premiere of “TVLand: Myths & Legends” also at 10pm. I think Susan Lucci claims she’s Phyllis Diller’s daughter. Hmmmmm…..maybe. Only their plastic surgeon knows for sure.
Last but far from least…..
“Project Runway” at 9pm. The judges are going to look at all the trash that the 4 finalists bought at Wal-Mart and decide who goes to “Fashion Week”. I’m hoping Kenley makes it just to piss everyone off. I loved the ’50′s.
“Top Design” at 10pm. (new episode). Wisit is going to show everyone his inner beauty this week when they design an eco-friendly office space. If Nathan wins this one, then I know he’s been spending time on the casting couch, and I don’t mean upholstering it.
If you happen to be up at midnight, check out “Man & Wife” on MTV. Husband & wife, Shanda & Scoop lay in bed and take sex questions over the phone and thru e-mails. It’s definitely not your typical sex talk. It’s really funny and different from the norm. “Check it Out”.
Finally, I’m going to get my boobs squished today at 1pm. Remember it’s “National Breast Cancer Month”. Get your moms, daughters, sisters, nieces, & granny’s to get checked out. Early detection is the difference between life & death. (god, I hope they don’t pop my nipple off!)