Walking Dead Recap: St. Zombie’s Day Massacre


Hey, y’all. To my American readers, I hope you had a good Thanksgiving! To my non-American readers, I hope you’re thinking about becoming an American citizen! And welcome to the full recap for The Walking Dead episode 207. AMC has decided to split season two into two sections, so this is going to be our last episode for a couple months. They’re calling this the “Midseason Finale”. I’m also referring to it as the “Zombies and Christmas Don’t Mix” Finale, or the “We Should Have Premiered This Season Earlier So It Wouldn’t Run Into December” Finale.

But whatever you call it, this episode is a big deal for the sole reason that it looks like the gang may finally…leave the goddamn farm. By far the biggest complaint from everyone over this first half-season has been that our heroes have been stuck in the mud and spinning their wheels week to week. But don’t worry! They may finally be gaining some traction.

Let’s get it on!

COLD OPEN

TEAM RICK’S CAMP

While last week focused on the revelation of the Lori Is Pregnant secret, and how that affected the group, this one’s pretty much gonna focus on the more immediate problem, the Zombies in the Barn secret. (Although there will be some scenes about the pregnancy this week, too).

Everyone in Team Rick is sitting around the campfire eating breakfast, looking tense. Rick looks like he’s lost in thought—remember, a few minutes ago ago he was told that a) his wife is pregnant and b) his wife was fucking his best friend—and Lori snaps him out of it. But he receives her nudge warmly, so it looks like they may be working through this, after all.

Then it’s over to Glenn. He looks across the lawn to the porch of the Greene’s house, where Maggie is shaking her head “NO!” at him. He looks back at Dale, who nods his head “Yes!” He’s going to tell everyone about the zombies in the barn.

So he gets on his feet, gets everyone’s attention, and after a long, awkward pause, does just that.

THE BARN

So everyone goes over to the barn to take a look. Yup. Shane is not happy, understandably. The way he sees it, they either have to kill these 12 dangerous zombies, which could break loose at any second, or leave the farm entirely.

Rick isn’t happy either, but he knows neither of those options are possible. They can’t kill the zombies because Herschel forbids it, and they can’t leave the farm…well, because Lori is pregnant, but he can’t use that as an excuse.

Instead, Carol speaks up. They can’t leave the farm because Sophia is still missing. Daryl agrees. Shane thinks they’re being morons and need to face facts: there’s like a 97.8% chance Sophia is dead by now. Tempers are rising, and Shane calls Daryl a meth-addled lunatic who wears zombie ears around his neck.

0207 daryl and carol

Which he’s stopped doing, by the way. Too bad. I was hoping to get a couple episodes out of “Daryl goes crazy”

Which, yes, is not a good enough reason for them to stay on the farm. Sophia most likely IS dead. But for now, Rick keeps his mouth shut about Lori and says he’s going to talk with Herschel one more time to try to get him to let them stay. They’ll sort out what to do about the zombies later.

Dale helpfully offers Rick a tip. Last week when Dale and Herschel talked about the zombies in the barn, Dale learned why Herschel is doing this: because he thinks the zombies are just people who can be cured, and aren’t entirely monsters. This is the exact same attitude Dr. Frankenstein had towards the Monster.

0207 dr greene

So basically he’s Dr. Frankenstein with a lesser medical degree

ACT ONE

THE BARN

After the credits, Shane stands outside the barn doors alone. The door is latched shut and has two different padlocks. He tests all of these and finds out, hey, they’re pretty shitty. How in the hell are they keeping the zombies inside?

THE CHICKEN COOP

Glenn finds Maggie gathering some eggs. Now that he’s blown her Pappy’s secret, against her explicit wishes, he wants to talk about it. She gives him the silent treatment for a bit, and then simply asks him for his hat.

Glenn is confused but hands it over anyway. She puts an egg inside and squashes it back on Glenn’s head. Message received.

Still, Glenn points out how it’s pretty stupid to waste food like that now that the zombiepocalypse is on.

0207 glenn egg

Holy shit! That’s the first time in the entire show that one of the characters has questioned the logic of something!

But Maggie says the egg was rotten anyway.

0207 maggie glenn egg

This screengrab is from when she broke the fourth wall and said, “You got clowned, SON!” I know, I couldn’t believe they did that either

THE CAMP

Lori is helping Carl do some math problems (Amazing!) But Carl is fixated on what Shane said earlier, about Sophia being dead. Does Lori think it’s true? She goes the “comforting lie” route. Of course she thinks it’s true, but she doesn’t tell Carl that.

And for Carl, that settles it. He’s been thinking things over and has decided he won’t leave the farm until Sophia is found. And once she IS found, he still wants to stay because he sees a future here on the farm.

Lori tries to smile. Wouldn’t they all? Hopefully Lori can at least find some comfort in Carl emulating Rick’s values, and not Shane’s. (Which he sort of was doing last week).

THE STABLES

Daryl is trying to carry a saddle to the stables to get a horse ready for another day of searching for Sophia. He’s clearly not recovered from his injuries two weeks ago, and he can barely get the saddle the whole way.

Carol finds him in the middle of the struggle. She doesn’t want him to go looking for her daughter today. Herschel says Daryl needs more rest and she agrees. Plus, Rick is supposed to go searching today, so the base is covered.

But it’s more than that. Carol drops a bombshell: she doesn’t want Daryl going out because she’s lost hope that Sophia will be found. And, to a lesser extent, she doesn’t want Daryl putting himself in harm’s way because she doesn’t want to lose him, too.

Dale looks disgusted. He tries to chuck the saddle in anger but barely tosses it a foot before doubling over in pain. Then he walks away, muttering that Carol’s a “stupid bitch”.

THE RV

Glenn is keeping watch on the roof of the RV when Dale comes walking by. Dale looks like he’s in a daze, and Glenn tells him Andrea is inside the RV, looking for him. Glenn’s also without a hat since his usual baseball cap is eggy now, so Dale tosses up his sun hat.

Inside, Andrea is getting some guns ready. She’s decided to join Rick in searching for Sophia. She looks like she’s completely over her recent feud with Dale, too. She also tells Dale that Shane has decided to post a guard outside the zombie barn, apparently without consulting Rick. Dale is still reeling after realizing Andrea slept with Shane, and then getting a glimpse of the brute Shane really is, so this news pushes him too far.

Once again, Dale’s primarily worried about Andrea. But he knows he can’t come right out and tell her about Shane because he doesn’t have any proof. So he has to tiptoe around it. He asks her what’s going on between them. Andrea, still tender over their feud, interprets this to be more fatherly meddling.

She assumes the issue is that Dale just doesn’t like Shane, but Dale tries to tell her it’s more than that, but he can’t really come right out and say “Shane’s a vicious, anti-social asshole.” He can only imply that.

And actually, that’s exactly what Andrea likes about Shane—Shane refuses to be a victim. She tells Dale to back off, but politely, in that way that suggests she still has no idea what Dale’s really talking about. If she did, she’d probably be way more defensive.

Dale’s getting frustrated at this point. He won’t say anything more and tells Andrea to get going.

By the way, Glenn heard all that through the hatch on the roof and asks Dale if everything’s all right. These people literally can’t keep anything from each other. Dale goes into a daze again and asks Glenn to run off and get him some water.

THE HOUSE

This next scene offers a tutorial in how not to argue with someone irrational.

Dr. Greene sits at the dining room table, having some lunch. Rick notices the Bible and tries to make small talk about it, but then awkwardly veers the conversation to his intended topic: they know about the barn. Rick needs to discuss it with Dr. Greene and won’t take no for an answer.

So, here’s Dr. Greene’s opening argument in said discussion: Team Rick has to leave by the end of the week.

Rick tries to appeal to Dr. Greene’s morals, pointing out that in throwing them out on the street, Dr. Greene would be essentially dooming Team Rick. Rick tries to explain that Dr. Greene doesn’t know what the zombiepocalypse is really like, since he’s been isolated the whole time. Rick tells him about the first zombie he ever saw, the girl missing her legs. That’s just one example of the horrors out there. And not only is the world horrible, and your life short and brutish, but in the time you do have it will change you.

But Dr. Greene feels he’s done enough to help them and his conscience is clear.

And finally Rick plays the only card he has left: Lori is pregnant. As Rick puts it, if they’re allowed to stay on the farm, the pregnancy is a blessing. If they’re kicked out, it’s a curse.

But Dr. Greene refuses to budge. They shout back and forth and Rick finally gives up. For now, not for good.

And then, Dr. Greene sees Maggie eavesdropping from the next room. They make eye contact. She looks Very Disappointed in him.

FIELD

Rick leaves the house in a huff and finds Shane leaning against a tractor in a field. He tells Shane what just went down with Dr. Greene

They argue some more about what to do. Shane still thinks they need to either stay and kill the zombies or leave, while Rick still wants to broker a compromise. Shane is losing his patience. The farm is clearly unsafe and he can’t understand why Rick is so hell bent on staying. It doesn’t make sense.

THERE HAS TO BE A BIGGER REASON. And there is. Rick tells Shane Lori is pregnant.

Awwwwkward.

More on this scene later, but the implications should be pretty clear. Does Shane think he’s the father? Does Shane think Rick knows about him and Lori? And so on.

Rick leaves Shane alone to process the information. But after a couple steps he turns back to ask Shane if he’s OK. Shane chokes out a congratulations. It’s not convincing in the slightest. Rick, who DOES know about Shane and Lori, can’t be too happy his best friend is lying to his face right now, but there are bigger things to worry about.

Man, that was a talky act. But don’t worry, it’ll pick up soon.

I lied. The next act is talky, too.

I shouldn’t have lied to you. I’m sorry.

ACT TWO

THE GREENE’S KITCHEN

Maggie is prepping some food when Dr. Greene comes in. She doesn’t respond when he says hello. The silent treatment again.

Dr. Greene knows why, so he skips straight to explaining his rationale for not letting them stay: He’s done enough to help them. Carl is healthy now. And, he claims Rick is being overly dramatic about the dangers of the world at large.

Seems pretty different from what he told Rick and Daryl earlier about losing the horse.

0207 dr greene angry

“They also should have died dozens of times already, but that’s what I told THEM, not you. I love you.”

Maggie doesn’t buy it. She too has seen how dangerous the walkers are and knows what her father’s decision means. He catches her use of the word “walkers” and realizes Team Rick has rubbed off on her.

Dr. Greene still claims he’s done enough to help Rick’s people, so Maggie gives Dr. Greene’s him a taste of his own medicine. When Maggie was 14, and Dr. Greene remarried, Maggie resented him and her new stepmom. And back then, he told Maggie to follow the Ten Commandments. Love thy neighbor as thyself.

0207 dr greene with bible

“See honey, the Bible clearly says, Honor thy father, thy mother, and the receptionist thy father knocked up”

Point is, if Dr. Greene can throw down the Bible to justify his behavior to Maggie, she should be able to throw it right back. Throwing out Rick’s people is far from loving thy neighbor.

Dr. Greene tries to explain that he’s just prioritizing. He loves Maggie MORE than he loves his neighbor, so her safety takes priority. He thinks Maggie is just worried about “that Asian boy” (again!). Maggie, admitting she does care about Glenn, insists that’s not why she’s making a stink. In her eyes, if Dr. Greene throws out Rick and company, he’s betraying their values.

So, really this is the same debate Rick and Shane are having. During the zombiepocalypse, do you maintain your values and your empathy, or do you look out for yourself and your loved ones?

It looks like Maggie’s words have registered with Dr. Greene. Then, Jimmy runs in, says “it happened again”. Uh-oh.

THE DRIVEWAY

Outside, Rick and Andrea are armed and getting ready to look for Sophia. Rick is drawing up yet another search plan. He’s rattling off several places for them to check and sounds like he might actually believe they’ll find something.

Dr. Greene joins them. Rick thinks he’s come to hassle him about their guns, but Dr. Greene needs help with “something else”. Andrea knows enough to give them their space.

TEAM RICK’S CAMP

Shane finds Lori as she’s chopping some carrots. Having just heard the news that she’s pregnant, he wants to talk about it. But he doesn’t start with that; he starts by trying to explain his rationale for starting things up with her in the first place: he thought Rick was dead.

Which leads him to something way more sinister. Shane tells Lori how, when he learned Rick was alive, his first feeling was sorrow because he knew Rick would soon die anyway. Shane knew Rick is a moral person and thus not suited for the zombiepocalypse.

To prove his case, Shane points to the fact that he’s saved Lori and Carl’s lives on four separate occasions. (The only one he mentions specifically is the zombie attack back in episode 104. Can you think of the others?). Whereas Rick just keeps putting the group in danger: i.e., Rick’s tendency to risk everything to save one person is what got Amy and Jim killed (because Rick was off trying to save Merle), and Otis killed and Carl and Daryl nearly so (because Rick insists on saving Sophia).

What Shane’s doing is so, so, SO loaded, isn’t it? First, the part about Rick’s death being inevitable. Shane is SO obviously setting the groundwork for a coup. If you convince Lori that Rick’s going to die soon, when you MURDER him she won’t think anything of it. All he has to do is wait for Rick to go off on another rescue mission, kill Rick, make it look like an accident, and, if this works, Lori will think the death was unavoidable.

And second, he’s trying to make her WANT to be with him. He’s presenting himself as the more attractive option. Shane = safe. Rick = death. That way, when Rick is out of the picture, Lori will WANT to be with Shane. She’ll be a willing participant in the relationship.

0207 shane 1

“That way it almost won’t feel like I’m raping you!”

After all that Shane finally brings up the pregnancy and suggests the baby might be his. Lori won’t even entertain that possibility. She tells Shane that even if the baby WERE his, it’d still be Rick’s. There’s nothing Shane can do to change that.

And then Shane’s Psycho Face resurfaces, and he tells her he doesn’t need to.

0207 shane psycho face

Or, “I don’t need to, because I’m going to arrange this so you’ll want me without even realizing it. OK? OK.”

He walks away. Now that he’s worked on the future wife, he needs to work on the future stepson. Carl is in camp reading a book and stops Shane. The kid Shane to know that even though Shane thinks Sophia is most likely dead, he refuses to give up the search for her.

We know what Shane really thinks about this. But the Psycho Face reappears, and he tells Carl he agrees with him completely.

Shane’s the perfect stepdad, isn’t he? Give the stepkids whatever they want and they’ll accept you!

Lori sees them talking from afar and clearly doesn’t like it. She seems pretty aware of what Shane is doing. She calls Carl over to her. Shane doesn’t like THAT, as if he seems aware that Lori is aware.

THE RV

Right after that, Shane storms into the RV. Glenn tries to say hello, but Shane ignores him. He’s on a mission.

Inside, he starts tearing the place apart, looking for something. Whatever it is, it’s either gone or has been lost. He looks pissed.

But Shane seems to know where the object went. He goes back outside and asks Glenn where Dale went. Glenn doesn’t know. The last he saw Dale was when Dale asked him to fetch some water, after the Andrea conversation. Dale’s disappeared.

So maybe that water request was a ruse to get Glenn away from the RV, so Dale could smuggle away whatever Shane’s looking for.

THE WOODS

Dr. Greene, Rick, and Jimmy approach a marshy area in the woods. Dr. Greene is explaining to Rick how these marshy areas surrounding the farm can suck a person in and keep them stuck there.

Or, they can suck in a zombie.

0207 quicksand

Yep. That knee-deep muddy water is exactly like quicksand.

Jimmy is carrying two water rescue poles. So it looks like this is how Dr. Greene has managed to collar so many zombies and transport them to the barn.

Dr. Greene doesn’t really need Rick’s. He’s brought him along to show him just how his zombie retrieval system works. Dr. Greene even happens to have known one of these new zombies personally. The lady zombie used to sell sweet corn on the side of the road.

Dr. Greene makes Rick an offer: they can stay, but only if they agree to treat zombies like sick people and not monsters. He hands Rick one of the poles.

ACT THREE

A POND

Daryl takes Carol to a pond we haven’t seen before. He’s found another Cherokee rose and is trying to use it to renew Carol’s optimism.

0207 cherokee rose

Hey writers! What do you do when your characters are facing new challenge? Give them the exact same solution as last time!

He then apologizes for calling her a bitch earlier this morning.

Carol, not being used to being treated with kindness, asks Daryl why he’s been so good to her and Sophia. Daryl says it’s because he believes Sophia is still out there.

But really, he admits, it’s because he doesn’t have anything else to do.

Which, I think, is true.

0207 daryl disappointed

“The writers coulda given me a Crazy Daryl arc over a couple episodes, but nooooo.”

But anyway, Carol is satisfied, so she picks the flower and feels optimistic again.

THE MARSH

Now Dr. Greene and Rick have their rescue poles around the woman-zombies’ necks. The plan is to lead them to the barn, which isn’t going to be easy since the zombies are actively trying to eat them.

Rick, thinking out loud, wonders what’s going to happen when the barn fills up, which it will soon. Then, he slips back into the marsh, nearly dropping the zombie. He barely manages to keep it under control.

THE RV

Glenn is still on top of the RV keeping watch when he sees Maggie coming across the field. He calls out to her, but she’s still giving him the silent treatment so he climbs down and approaches.

It’s time to settle their dispute. Glenn starts out by trying to convince Maggie she put him in an impossible situation by asking him to keep her secret. But that doesn’t wash. So he tells her what was really going through his head when he decided to spill the beans…

Glenn was thinking about the time he was lowered into the well to wrangle the water zombie, and about last week, when he rescued Maggie from the zombie at the pharmacy. To his surprise, neither encounter scared him. And that’s bad because zombies are dangerous and you need to be afraid of them to make sure your guard is up.

0207 glenn x

You were looking for a video game to compare your life to…and you picked the one with the robots and the teleporting? Nice, Glenn

The point is, Glenn’s realization has reminded him to respect the Zombie, and he decided that keeping zombies in the barn puts everyone in danger—but especially Maggie. He decided he’d rather she be safe and pissed at him than dead and liking him. So he spoke up

And what do you know? She melts.

0207 kiss

“Please don’t get hurt, Glenn. I really don’t want to have to start fucking Carl”

SWAMP

Back to Shane. If you’re a budding sociopath and you want to overthrow the leader of your little tribe, and one other person in the tribe knows this about you, you’re gonna want to take care of it.

Dale is in the swamp. Maybe the same swamp where Rick and Herschel and the zombies just were. Who knows?

Over his shoulder Dale has a rifle, and in his hands is the big black duffel bag, full of the group’s guns. He’s come to hide them. Just as he’s about to unpack them, Shane steps out from behind a tree.

Dale sees him, and, I loved this, makes a sarcastic comment about how he wishes Shane would’ve used these tracking skills back when they were looking for Sopia.

I’m not totally sure why Dale is hiding the guns. Is he trying to prevent Shane from doing something drastic about the zombies in the barn? Or is he just trying to help Rick negotiate with Herschel—getting rid of the guns that Herschel’s never wanted on the farm might be just what they need.

Whatever it is, Shane wants the guns back. Dale refuses. Time for a showdown.

Shane has already shown his willingness to abandon principles to get what he wants. How far is Dale willing to go?

Shane knows this and dares Dale to take the rifle and shoot him, or else just hand the guns over without resistance. Dale sets the bag of guns down, takes the rifle off his shoulder, and chambers a round. Shane steps forward, and Dale aims the gun at his heart.

So Shane steps right into the rifle. He makes it clear: the only way Dale walks away with the guns is if Shane is dead. And Dale puts the rifle down.

He still tries to save some face, though. He claims he’s doing this on principle. Even when the world went to shit, Dale wouldn’t let it take him down with it. Unlike, you know, Shane.

But Shane just shrugs.

ACT FOUR

THE PORCH

Most of Team Greene and Team Rick are waiting around on the porch. They don’t know where Shane and Dale have gone, or Rick and Herschel. They don’t know what’s going on.

Shane comes walking up, with all the guns. He hands one to Daryl, then T-Dog, and so on. Time to dance.

Maggie objects. She warns Shane that if he attacks the zombies in the barn her dad will kick them off the farm this very night. Shane ignores her and walks over to Carl to give him the .38. Shane is going all in and even the kid is gonna take part.

So Lori objects. This isn’t Shane’s call to make, it’s Rick’s.

But then T-Dog sees something off in the distance:

0207 guys with zombies

This is an affront to everything Shane believes…Rick and Herschel trying to escort zombies back to the barn in broad daylight. He sprints across the field towards them.

Shane starts berating them. Do they really think they’re doing the right thing? Rick and Shane tell him to stand down but it’s past that. It’s time to show Herschel once and for all that zombies are dead. Shane takes out his pistol and shoots Herschel’s zombie in the chest three times. The zombie doesn’t even react. The point: could something living survive that? He shoots it again in the heart and lungs, and finally, once in the head.

Herschel is too stunned to even react. He just watches the dead zombie go down.

But Shane keeps going. He’s had enough! Enough zombies in barns, enough searching for little girls who are most likely dead. Enough needlessly putting themselves in danger. Enough of Rick’s antiquated mindset.

Shane picks up a pickaxe and begins hacking away the padlock on the barn door. Rick wants to stop him but can’t let go of the zombie on the end of his rescue pole. He screams for Herschel to take the pole from him but Herschel can’t move.

The doors are open. Shane moves back and raises his gun to wait for them. They come out.

0207 smiling zombie

Shane and everyone are some of the lucky few who get to actually live in a House of the Dead game

He opens fire. The first couple zombies go down. Andrea, T-Dog, and Daryl join him. Even Glenn.

One by one the zombies emerge and the gang mows them down. The zombies don’t even come close. It’s a goddamn massacre.

Shane turns and shoots the zombie Rick is subduing, freeing Rick to shield Carl and Lori. Now he can only watch. The best chance he had of keeping Lori and Carl safe is evaporating right in front of him.

It’s over. Dale finally arrives and looks totally stunned.

And it looks like that’s it for the first half of season two. Pragmatism trumps morality, Team Rick is nomadic once again. T-Dog’s arm is really sore.

But wait! There’s one more zombie. Zombie Sophia.

Carol shrieks and tries to run over to it but Daryl has to hold her back. Zombie Sophia comes out of the barn and looks around, not quite as menacing as the other zombies. But then she snarls and starts toward the group.

Shane and the others are stunned. They can’t make themselves put this one out of its misery. So it’s up to Rick. He walks forward, draws his gun, and shoots Zombie Sophia down.

THE END

Whew! That one was craaaaaaaazy. By far my favorite of the half-season. Here are some of my reactions…

-I loooooved that Lori was still giving Carl math lessons during the zombiepocalpyse. What a badass.

-I also really liked when Dr. Greene was giving Rick instructions on how to handle a zombie once you’ve got it all tied up. Like zombies are horses are something.

-I really did mean it when I said I wanted a Crazy Daryl plotline. I hope we’ll at least get a Crazy Shane. I want him to start influencing Carl.

-That slo-mo shot of Norman Reedus shooting the shotgun that I used for the front page pic, with the flame oozing out of the barrel? Fucking amazing.

And now on to the big questions of the episode…

-Why didn’t Rick confront Shane about his affair with Lori, especially when he told Shane Lori was pregnant? I just think Rick realized there were more important things to worry about at the moment and a fight wouldn’t be productive.

A couple episodes ago, when Lori and Shane were arguing about staying on the farm or leaving, Shane thought Rick was being weak and indecisive by staying, but Lori made the observation that Rick was actually showing strength: it’s actually way easier to cut and run than it is to stay and fight. I think this is another example of Rick’s strength. I think Rick clearly wanted to confront Shane this week but managed to keep his feeling in check.



-Did Dr. Greene know Sophia was in the barn? And if he did, why didn’t he tell them? You guys covered a lot of that on the minicap. Some of what I remember: A) Dr. Greene didn’t know who exactly was in the barn because it was Otis’s job to tend to the zombies, and Otis is dead; B) Dr. Greene DID know but didn’t tell them because it would blow his cover.

I’m inclined to go with B, even if it makes no sense. Dr. Greene ALSO told them they could stay on the farm until they found Sophia. If he wanted them gone, he could have achieved that easily by telling them she was in there. Why not just do that?

My overall theory is this: sometimes there can be large vacuums in the TV Show Space-Time Continuum from which no logic can escape. It’s also known as The Plot Hole Theory.

-I like whenever the show explores the small group dynamic, and I wish they did more of it. One example: it’s pretty much impossible to keep secrets from each other. That happened again last week, when Dale was in the RV, trying to convince Andrea not to get involved with Shane. Glenn was on the roof of the RV keeping watch and heard the whole thing.

-But one thing I want them to explore more is the idea that in only a few weeks the zombiepocalypse has transformed Rick and the gang from a group of post-modern 21st century Americans to pre-historic hunter-gatherers. (For a while I was gonna be an archaeologist, so I geek out over this stuff). Sometimes they get it right—they all realize they need to band together to increase their odds of survival: aside from Rick, Shane, Lori, and Carl, everyone in the group were strangers to each other until the bombs hit Atlanta. Banding together is smart, it’s what the Palaeolithic people did, and it’s one reason why we beat out all the bigger and stronger predators of the time.

But other times they fuck it up—like caring about the paternity of Lori’s new baby. There’s a new theory that says prehistoric tribes didn’t have a concept of monogamy. Since everyone was just fucking each other all the time, they wouldn’t know who had fathered which babies, so all the men in the tribe, and all the women, treated all the babies like they were their own. Like I said last week, if only Shane, Lori, and Rick went to a library and got a copy of Sex at Dawn, they’d know not to care about who the father is.

So what I’m saying is, GREAT job, Rick, Shane, and Lori. Schmucks.

That’s all for me, and the show until February 18th, 2012. Come on back to the ‘gasm because we’ll have the remaining six diced up for you. I know a lot of us got really frustrated at the slow pace this season, but not to worry: I hear things are going to be radically different. Team Rick IS going to leave the farm…and then take refuge on a cattle ranch.

See you then!

IronE Singleton,

SCOA

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Saint Clare of Assisi attended Boston University and has written for The Onion.  He took his name from the patron saint of television, who was a virgin and saved a boy from a wolf one time.

38 Comments

  1. 1
    See-Jay
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 6:50 am

    That final scene when a zombified Sophia stumbled out of the barn was one of the most gut-wrenching, deflating television scenes that I’ve ever seen. This season has been a frustrating experience for me but I have to give them kudos for how they capped off the midseason. Wow.

  2. 2
    Bioscotto
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 7:46 am

    I admit, they NEARLY surprised me with Sophia…when they made it clear that one more zombie was left…and were making a big deal about the reveal, my mind started turning about who it could be…and about two seconds before the reveal, I literally, on my couch, whispered “Oh no…SOPHIA!”

    I feel like the entire six episodes were a build up to that one moment…and apparently the writers had decided that would be the way the midseason finale would end…so they had to stretch out what should have been a two…maybe three…episode arc into six episodes. Hence the dragginess…

    Hopefully, things will pick up significantly now that there is active dissent in the group and the farm isn’t so hospitable…

  3. 3
    See-Jay
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 8:44 am

    I was thinking that it would be Hershel’s wife (followed by some melodramatic scene) so when it turned out to be Sophia I was caught completely off guard. I’m glad I was wrong.

  4. 4
    itchy
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 8:49 am

    I think the writers missed the boat this season. What’s interesting about this series in the SITUATION, not the characters. Focusing on the situation would have been a whole lot more interesting — there would have been plenty of time for character development along the way.

    Instead, they decided to focus almost entirely on character development — and the show just got stuck in the same swamp as that pair of walkers.

    I can’t believe how damned boring this “finale” was. Sure, the last couple of minutes were great. But we had to slog through forty minutes of the slowest-paced Zombie-apocalypse footage of all time. Not to mention the Shane character’s annoying-as-hellness.

    But like I said in the minicap: Hooray! Sophia dead!

    (Even though I feel they missed a huge opportunity here — why couldn’t they have shown us Sophia’s transition to zombiehood? At least, shown us the attack that turned her into the cutest lil’ zombie there ever was.)

  5. 5
    itchy
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 8:52 am

    (you know, I really really wish there was an editing function for these comments. Sigh. I’m the king of typos. )

  6. 6
    Jessi
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 9:47 am

    I didn’t even recognize Sophia until I saw Carol’s reaction. I saw the slow reveal and thought “Oh sad, a kid. Well, Rick’s killed a little girl zombie before, so this shouldn’t be a problem.” Herschel, as misguided as he is, completely broke my heart.

  7. 7
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 10:00 am

    My biggest problem with TWD this season is that the writers want to do a “Grace v. Nature” storyline that’s Terrence Malick’s bread and butter but they’ve painted it so that Rick is the saint and always right but Shane is a brute and crazy and wrong. But Shane’s right that the group’s been in more danger since Rick came back.

    If the writers would just fire up a few bowls and watch “The Thin Red Line” about 100 times they’d understand how to structure this storyline where both sides need each other instead of everyone crapping on the pragmatist. Witt would have been ridiculous without Welch bringing him back down to earth and Welch was miserable without Witt’s hope. But Rick & Shane? A fool and a goon.

    And then they need to recast Shane because Bernthal sucks.

  8. 8
    Muppet
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 10:04 am

    See-Jay – I couldn’t have said it better myself. I damn near burst into tears when I saw those little sneakers appear on screen. I’ve been saying all season that Sophia better be a zombie by now, but now that’s it happened it’s so unfulfilling. Just incredibly sad.

    That being said – Rick and Dale are going to get them all killed. Let Rick, Lori, Carl and Dale go off on their own and let’s follow Daryl, Shane, Glenn and Andrea (although she’s annoying too) through the wilderness. Mostly Daryl though.

  9. 9
    notwithoutmytv
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 10:37 am

    I wouldn’t trust Terrence Malick to direct an episode of Itchy and Scratchy.

  10. 10
    plockeness monster
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 12:23 pm

    I LOVE RICK!!!!

    I also love your recaps, Saint C! Thanks for taking the time to break everything down. it makes for an easy read. I’ll be back in Feb.!

    I also thought that Dr. Greene’s wife was going to be the last one out of the barn, not Sophia. I know she was a kid, but shit, I am glad that she is dead and the Sophia search storyline can die with it.

    As far as Dale and Shane and the gun situation, I have always felt like Shane was in charge of them. He is the one that conducts the target practice classes, etc. I think that’s why Dale wanted to get rid of them. And whoowee, I was going to be pissed if Shane touched a hair on Dale’s head. I really like him and I hope we get some of his back story. How can you not like a grandpa that you could call “Pappy?” He totally looks like a Pappy.

    Shane mentioned that it was Rick’s fault Amy and Jim were dead. Who is Jim?

    Lastly, I watched some of the Talking Dead. The first episode (webisode?) was really good. The panel brings up some good points. A fan asked, if zombies are attracted to gun fire, why don’t they use silencers? Answer: Sometimes it takes almost a whole day to find a can of peas. How the fuck are they going to track down a silencer? ALSO, a viewer brought up some of the plot holes that we all have been discussing and Patton Oswald pointed out that it was a zombie apocalypse and that is more implausable than a lot of the things that the viewers are questioning. Don’t get me wrong, all of the writer’s inconsistencies should not be ignored. It was a good first season and we (the audience) deserved a kick ass second season. This season has been slow, no doubt, but I think that it is still a great show. I didn’t see the Sophia thing coming, and it blew my mind. And like I said, I choose to believe that the writers of the show read the recap and the comments and things will be better for the second half of the second season

  11. 11
    TalldrinkofH2O
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 1:43 pm

    plockeness monster,
    Jim is the guy with the dark hair and beard who suddenly went crazy digging graves back when they were at the campsite outside of Atlanta (before they made their way to the CDC.) He evidently had a dream where the zombies overran them – which became reality – so he was digging graves ahead of time. He was bitten during the zombie attack, but was taken along in the RV, tended by Jackie, until he insisted that the group leave him on the roadside as he could feel that he was turning.

  12. 12
    plockeness monster
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 2:58 pm

    Thanks H20! I googled Jim and a recap for the episode “Vatos” came out. Jogged my memory. This is also the episode where Amy dies.

    Saint, you asked if we knew of the other times Shane saved Lori and Carl. He saves them in the “Vatos” episode – Rick was in Atlanta getting guns and looking for Merle, so that’s 2 times he has saved her. BUT I am using the term “save” loosely b/c I am Team RICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  13. 13
    maryedith
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 3:09 pm

    About the Talking Dead conversation — I think the opposite of what they were saying is true. If you have an impossible/supernatural central premise you’ve got to be even more careful to keep everything else consistent.

  14. 14
    Mimo
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 3:09 pm

    How many times do you think the guns (that Rick rescued) have saved lives?

  15. 15
    maryedith
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    Also, re P1 of the recap, it doesn’t look from the previews as if the gang is leaving that damn farm anytime soon.

  16. 16
    itchy
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 4:03 pm

    I don’t quibble with the plausibility so much as the gaping inconsistencies with the storytelling. Things don’t necessarily have to make sense within our universe, but they definitely must be coherent and consistent within this universe. And they’re not. I call that shoddy writing.

    But the really true crime is that they’ve made a Zombie apocalypse story boring. And for that, I can’t forgive.

  17. 17
    Liz
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 4:33 pm

    I totally agree with Valle about Rick and Shane. Everyone keeps saying Shane is tortured or complex but he seems pretty one dimensional to me. And I do wish both Rick and Shane were more complex. Also, I’m totally team Rick too!

  18. 18
    maryedith
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 7:13 pm

    I see what vallegirl is saying about Rick and Shane being one-dimensional, but I’m on team Itchy with the situation vs character development thing. There’s a pretty strong central situation here — zombie apocalypse — and the characters have to have fairly prescribed roles if the situation is to move at all. I’m not sure about the Grace vs Nature thing; I just think Rick is more of a grownup than Shane.

  19. 19
    lindaw205
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 7:21 pm

    Agreeing with maryedith and itchy. My sister was watching one of her soaps the other day and the scene I saw reminded me too much of a similiar scene on TWD. They (Kirkman, et al), really screwed the pooch.

  20. 20
    newlyengaged
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 8:44 pm

    I guess I’m the only one that saw the Sophia thing coming a long time ago (surely I’m not the only one that thought that when they introduced the zombies in the barn scene). I’m not bragging about it, I think it’s a nice twist but because I was thinking about it the whole time before the “big reveal” I wasn’t as pleasantly surprised, so this episode dragged for me (per usual). It’s getting harder and harder for me to justify watching this. I found this season so disappointing. I hope the group splits up, as others suggested. I’m sick of that damn farm and the same dialogues over and over. Plus I’m curious about what happened to the guy that Rick was supposed to keep in contact with over the radio. Remeber, in the beginning the guy and his son saved him, filled him in on the situation (I believe he had to shoot his zombiefied wife, but I can’t remember), and then they promised to try and keep in touch. Did they ever say what happened to him? He was a far more interesting character (in my opinion) then most of the others though I have a major soft spot for Dale, Daryl, and Glenn. In fact, I would probably be cool if the other characters were killed off, I’m sick of their contrived storylines. Except maybe Carol.

  21. 21
    lindaw205
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 9:12 pm

    Oh no, I think they did a pretty good job of telgraphing that Sophia would be in the barn, at least I know I had no doubts.

    I’m afraid we’ll never know what happened to Morgan and his son since they are people of color. Look at T-Dog….everyone seems to have a past and lines! except for him. I wish they would flesh out his character and give him some screen time….they could borrow some from Lori/Rick/Shane.
    I guess I’ll be back for the rest of the season, I’ll watch the first episode, anyway, and go from there. I’m heartbroken at what they’ve done to this show!

  22. 22
    spinal11
    Posted November 30, 2011 at 10:00 pm

    Although I was fully expecting Zombie Sophia to happen and thoroughly bored with the endless “is she or isn’t she?” plotline, I still got a bit choked up seeing those tiny shoes shuffling out. Thinking about a little kid’s last moments being – well, THAT – is sad and disturbing any way you cut it. It was a great, effective way to end an arc that hasn’t been that great or effective in its entirety. Poor Sophia.

  23. 23
    itchy
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 12:42 am

    Baby steps, linda, baby steps. At least they’ve given an entire story arc to ‘that Asian boy.’ I for one have always wondered why the only people who ever survive these pesky apocalypses are white christian types….hmmm…

  24. 24
    Snootchy Bootches
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 3:54 am

    *raises hand* I knew Sophia would be in that barn too. I’m still enjoying the show so I can’t complain too much, but I do wish someone would kick the writers in the ass.

  25. 25
    itchy
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 6:14 am

    Gotta admit, I wasn’t expecting Sophia to come out of the barn. Partly because I refused to believe they would have wasted HALF A SEASON on this. My thought (hope) was that Sophia had stumbled upon another survivor group — think of the possibilities! But no… it was far more important for us to listen to 100 Good Rick monologues and a few dozen long lingering Shane “Crazy Eyes” moments. Not to mention that black who just REFUSED to shut up. Can’t believe how much dialogue they wasted on him. Damn.

  26. 26
    plockeness monster
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 6:35 am

    Wooooo, Itchy, another survivor group & Sophia would’ve been awesome!

  27. 27
    Snootchy Bootches
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 6:48 am

    Well -technically- Sophia was with another survivor group. It is just the same group they have been hanging out with for… what is it now? 932 episodes? Something like that.

  28. 28
    April
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 6:00 pm

    I was surprised by the zombie Sophia in the barn. I should have known though that she was at least dead when they found the doll. If you know children well, that was her lovey toy. She carried it everywhere. It was the one thing she had that was hers from her old life. She would not have left it behind in the woods. That spot he found the doll was probably where she died. Kids don’t leave their lovey toys behind.

    I liked this season. Yes, it dragged some. Still good tv. I predicted the barn held zombies though before the reveal. It was weird that Hershel didn’t want them having guns and that whole AIDS conversation he had early on with Rick and the whole “Don’t go down to the barn!” was very suspicious from the get go.

    I am Team Daryl or Shane personally. I was cheering Shane on when he was yelling and getting ready to kick some zombie butt. It is crazyness to tolerate the whole not killing a zombie just because you knew them as a person. I would shoot my own child in the brain should they turn into a zombie without hesitation. Zombies are zombies and we don’t have time for emotional babies in the zombie Apocalypse.

    Rick is too human for this world and I don’t like a lot of his decisions. I agree with Shane. I would hang with Daryl in this reality. He has mad crossbow skills and hunting and tracking skills. Shane has the right attitude most of the time in the actual practical situations. He just gets crazy about his feelings for skinny bitch.

    Also was anyone else glad Shane and Andrea just got it over with and screwed already? The sexual tension between them was getting to be much.

    I like Glenn and Maggie together.

    I think we are supposed to see and realize that Sophia was dead from the moment that zombie went after her. It was destined.

  29. 29
    maryedith
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 8:10 pm

    @newlyengaged, I think the first scene of this season was Rick on the cb thing he used to communicate with Morgan. He said he wasn’t going to try to talk to him anymore, but he hoped he would find him at some point. Maybe Fort Benning.

  30. 30
    maryedith
    Posted December 1, 2011 at 8:14 pm

    I’ve been pretty bitchy about this season, but I sure have enjoyed reading all of your comments and thinking about what makes for good and bad tv. I’ll have Justified to tide me over till February, but I’ll miss you guys!

  31. 31
    plockeness monster
    Posted December 2, 2011 at 6:29 am

    Mary, you are right about Rick/CB/Morgan.

  32. 32
    LastCall
    Posted December 2, 2011 at 9:01 pm

    Thanks for the thorough recap! It’ll hold me over till this show comes back on…when is it, Valentine’s Day? Damn!

    I’ma agree with Maryedith. When a show has a preposterous plotline to begin with, like this one does, I think it’s important that they pay attention to the little details. It makes it much easier for me to suspend disbelief. I’m doing OK with that, still, but they’re really trying my patience sometimes. One thing I’m not buying is Hershel’s level of self-delusion. I get that denial can be very strong in some people, but he’s a vet, and I’m sure he knows what diseases like rabies do to the affected animals’ brains, so how exactly does he expect this “sickness” to be any different? Those “infected people” in the barn were literally rotting away in front of his eyes, and he’s apparently done nothing to try to find a cure himself, yet he’s convinced a cure will just fall into his lap? Where does he think this cure will come from anyway? He’d have to be crazy to keep this mindset for so long…and he doesn’t seem totally crazy to me. It’s all a bit much.

    Re: Sophia’s doll…I just re-watched last season’s episodes, and when the group was leaving the quarry, there was one family that decided to go their own way. They were Spanish I believe. Anyway, when the little Spanish girl was saying goodbye to Sophie – I guess they had become friends – she handed Sophia her rag doll. So unless Sophia had given that girl her doll first (which may actually have happened and I just missed it) then I don’t think Sophia would have had a huge attachment to that particular doll. Very minor point, I know, but since I saw that episode last night, I thought I’d through that out there:)

    Be back in February I guess!

  33. 33
    lindaw205
    Posted December 2, 2011 at 9:44 pm

    @maryedith – Yes! I love Justified….when is the season premiere? Last season was just so damn good I don’t see how they can top it.

    Thanks so much for the great recaps, Saint Claire, and hope you’ll be back to finish up the season in February.

  34. 34
    maryedith
    Posted December 2, 2011 at 10:21 pm

    @lindaw — It doesn’t actually start until January, but I don’t really count December as a tv month anyway. I don’t know how they can top last season either. No more “apple pie”! It would be great if someone could recap it on this site. Like…St Claire?

  35. 35
    rayplayhockey
    Posted December 3, 2011 at 10:29 pm

    Sophia/Barn/Yes. I predict Dr Greene will get bitten next. Then he’ll bit someone else–but suture it up afterwards. And after that, he’ll lock himself in the barn.

  36. 36
    maryedith
    Posted December 3, 2011 at 10:35 pm

    My dad just emailed a list of the top ten baby names for 2011 (he does this every year) and the number one girl name was “Sophia.” I was like, “ENOUGH already.”

  37. 37
    timgunnssister timgunnssister
    Posted December 6, 2011 at 11:24 am

    I think the ending was fascinating in that now the group can finally understand Herschel’s attempts to keep the walkers alive as they were people he knew – only Rick had the cojones to take down Sophia. And now Herschel fully understands that the walkers are, in fact, walking dead people and no amount of tetracycline or zombie antidote will turn tham back into living humans.

    So, now what? Does Herschel agree that they can stay and shoot zombies to their hearts content? Does the group blanche each time they see a walker, wondering if it’s their great Aunt Edna or someone they met in a grocery store so how can they kill them? Do Daryl and Carol (how cute, they rhyme) get it on? Does someone finally shoot Shane just because?

    So many questions……….so much time until the next episode.

  38. 38
    April
    Posted December 8, 2011 at 6:29 am

    Lastcall: Oh thanks for pointing that out. I didn’t know that doll was given to her by the other girl. I think it still stands though that especially when she was lost in the woods and scared, she would have never let that doll go. So that to me still stood out as foreshadowing that she was definitely gone. Minor point to argue. That just stood out to me.

    Every zombie movie has the old “I can’t shoot him, he is my brother!” moments where someone they know goes zombie and they won’t shoot them. It always makes me so mad! Yes, you just know that they can cure your flesh rotting off your face and missing limbs. Sure that is totally curable! People lose their minds and sanity over grief and all that, but still I have no patience for that emotional behavior when zombies are walking around!

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