Greetings Gasmii! This week, '24' has the remedy for whatever ails you. Bored? Well, how about a bunch of shit blowing up and people getting shot left and right? Confused? Maybe a little back-story tonic and future relationship foreshadowing will do the trick? Tired of the Sangala plot line? Well how about an in-depth look at the new Big Baddies?
Whatever your ailment...Dr. Quinn is here to make it better. Let her check you out...after the jump!
It's 8PM in Vice President Hayworth's bunker, where he and his gang are watching news footage about the hostage situation in the White House. Little piggy aide David tells the VP that Bid Daddy Larry Moss is still requesting authorization for a tactical strike to re-take the White House. Ass-Coverer Hayworth, however, is still not hearing it. He needs confirmation that Madame Prez is either safely in lock-down or in the hands of Juma before he makes his decision.
Back in the White House, Ma' Taylor and Lil' Olivia seem to have finally made peace while crouching in a corner cowering from the terrorists. There's nothing like impending doom to bring a lost little lamb back into the fold, eh? We get a little of the back-story (finally!), and it turns out that Olivia turned her back on her Mother after being fired from the Presidential Campaign. Olivia admits to her Mother that it was silly and stupid of her to have reacted like a spoiled little bitch, and Ma Taylor tells her she forgave her a long time ago. She also whispers in Livvy's ear that they are going to survive this mess, but she needs to be ready and keep her eyes open. Madame Prez must have whispered a few other family secrets after the audio cut out, because Olivia's reaction to hearing they are about to be rescued is stunned terror. What's up with that? As they hug and cry together, one of Juma's men comes to take Prez Taylor away.
Over in the main hostage huddle, Jack lets Bill in on a little plan he has to save the President. Apparently, the safe room had five canisters of CH-4, which Jack opened before they exited. The lock-down room is currently filling with natural gas and becoming one big Kaboom waiting to happen! All he needs to do is act like a crazy man, run towards the room, and draw the terrorists' fire, which should set the whole thing off and take out most of Juma's men! Easy Peasy! Bill notes that it sounds like a suicide play, and Jack flips through his little note-pad with over-used 'Jack-isms' for a response and settles on "we don't have a choice!" Bauer also tells Bill that Madame Prez is aware of the plan and will be ready for Bill to swoop in and save her after the explosion.
Semator Pansy-Pants-Dick-Head Mayer buts in and wants to know what the super secret plan is. Bill tells him he'll find out when the rest of the viewing public does, but this isn't enough for Dick-Head! He wants to know now. Jack turns to Pansy-Pants and awesomely says "Senator, Shut Up!"
On the other side of the foyer, General Candyman Juma is handing some prepared remarks that he worked up with his little speech writer, in which the Prez will admit to the "atrocities" committed by the Americans against Sangala today. Madame Prez knows the way this game is played, and tells Juma she'll read the statement as long as he releases all the other hostages. After all, he got the President and isn't that what he wants? Juma agrees to release "one" hostage as a sign of good faith. Juma selects one poor schmuck from the mass, brings him over to the President's sight line, and shoots him in the head! Ouch!
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Comments (8)
Great episode! Hilarious recap! Thanks, Dogsnaxx!
Who else thinks Zombie Spice looks like Miss Coco Peru?!?!?!?
1 of 8 | Posted by slumrville | Posted on March 14, 2009 7:24 AM
@ slumrville
LOL. I googled Miss Coco, and you are right! If Renee had an Adam's Apple and Dong, they'd be twins!
2 of 8 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on March 14, 2009 7:59 AM
One of your best recaps, Dogsnaxx!
Did you notice that the GI Joe/Bill doll looked like John McCain?
I think that Sen. Pansy Pants shrieked, "Behind you!" at Jack, not "NO!"
I'll bet Hodges is scheming to put evil Powers Boothe in the White House! He was probably Taylor's disgraced opponent.
3 of 8 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on March 14, 2009 2:51 PM
HAHAHAHA!!! AGREED!!! Feel free to insert a visual comparison in next week's recap (and a shout-out would be nice)!!!
4 of 8 | Posted by slumrville | Posted on March 14, 2009 8:01 PM
Great job, as usual! I can always count on you to make me laugh! And point out things I missed watching the show - hello the Bill doll!
Speaking of Bill... Am I the only one mourning him? I loved his character, Chia growth and all. He has that hot older man thing going on, plus he was always just a decent character. I wish they could have gotten Dickhead in the explosion instead.
Loved the zombie screen shot of Walker - I delete way too many pictures of myself with that same expression. The Willis one was so funny too!
Olivia needs to be bitch slapped.
Think Hodges is in cahoots with Hayworth?
5 of 8 | Posted by jjnoza | Posted on March 14, 2009 10:20 PM
@ Pixielated
Thanks! And you are totally right, that doll looks like McCain! The producers of the show are McCain fans, I wonder if it was intentional?
@ Slumrville
...stay tuned! If Renee gives Coco face, I'll do a side by side for sure.
@ jjnoza
I totally got a little choked up when Bill bought the farm during my first viewing of the episode. I think repeated viewings and trying to be funny in the recap desensitized me. But let's all raise our glasses to Chia Bill. He grew and grew and grew into our hearts!
I have a feeling Hayworth has something to do with everything going on. If it's not him, it's his little piggy David.
6 of 8 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on March 15, 2009 6:16 AM
*raises glass* RIP, Chia Bill!
7 of 8 | Posted by jjnoza | Posted on March 15, 2009 4:46 PM
I'll miss Bill.
8 of 8 | Posted by Firthguy | Posted on March 16, 2009 8:32 AM