A few minutes later, Cara and Tony are still hanging out in the warehouse and waiting for Alan. Cara mentions that Alan doesn't know she's been boning Tony, and if it's cool with him, she'd like to keep it their dirty little secret. Tony could care less...he just wants to know where the heck Alan is. Just then, they notice his motorcade pulling up!
Alan is rolling with a small army of security, and hangs out in the back of his limo while they search Tony and Cara for weapons. They allow Tony to hang onto his cell phone, and the amount of attention the camera pays to this little detail tells us the phone is DEFINITELY the trigger to the BauerBomb. Given the all-clear by security, Alan finally steps out of his limo. Security keeps Tony at bay, but Cara goes up to him and gives him a little peck on the cheek. The little slut is boning her boss, too!
Alan grills Tony about his desire to "play a larger role", his voice dripping with skepticism. He has his goons retrieve Bauer from the warehouse. While Jack approaches Wilson, Tony fingers his cell phone anxiously. But wait! A helicopter approaches. It's Renee and the Feds, just in time to save the day! The baddies, as if they weren't already screwed, decide to open fire on the FBI.
In the ensuing shoot-out, all the Baddies are taken out one by one. All the Baddies, that is, except Alan, Cara, and Tony who manage to run into the warehouse. Convenient! Jack cowers behind a van, and Renee rides outside an SUV, gun blazing, over to him. She does a nifty leap, somersault, duck maneuver to avoid gunfire, and meets up with Jack behind the van. Jack tells her to get away from him! He's wired with explosives! Luckily, in addition to being an expert SUV surfer and acrobat, Renee knows how to disarm that particular kind of bomb and gets to work. While she snips away at the wires, Jack fills her in on the Alan Wilson stuff and Tony's good,bad,good,bad,psycho shifts of allegiance. Bomb disarmed, the two super-agents run into the warehouse to catch up w/ the Evil trio.
In the warehouse, Alan and Cara are sneaking around and Alan wants to know how the f*ck things got so screwed up?! Cara has no clue, of course. Tony approaches, and Cara runs up to greet him. While she starts talking about their "escape", a gunshot goes off! Tony totally frickin' shot her in the stomach! It's Agent Erika DeadSlut all over again! While Cara dies and stares at Tony in shock, he ignores her and glares at Alan the whole time.
After Cara hits the floor, Tony goes all berserk and runs up to Alan, grabbing him by the shoulders and ranting about how long it took him to get to this moment and how the revenge for his murdered wife will be oh so sweet! Alan awesomely plays stupid and says "it sounds like you were involved in some kind of tragedy, but I had nothing to do with it." This REALLY riles Tony up and between a few pistol whips, he delivers a rage-filled sobbing soap-operatic tirade about how he and Michelle were just about to start a new life together, and oh yeah...she was carrying his SON! Tony finishes his drawn out monologue and is about to kill Alan, when Renee and Jack come in and poop all over his murder party. They shoot Tony in the shoulder, and then Jack shoots him again in the wrist when Tony ignores orders to please stop crawling toward his gun. (I bet Tony's re-evaluating the length of that angst-y monologue now, eh?)
While the Feds take the wounded Tony into custody, he turns his rage toward Jack. He screams that Alan Wilson's group of Baddies needed to be taken down, and Jack ran away to Africa! In Tony-logic, that makes Jack one of the bad guys and he has to go and bring the late Teri Bauer into it, telling Jack she'd be ashamed. Jack winces at Teri's name while Renee glares at Alan Wilson. After Tony is dragged out kicking and screaming, Jack falls to the floor either having one of his little seizures, or in exhaustion...as we cut to break!
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Comments (7)
Great recap, Dogsnaxx! I can almost forgive you for being so late.
Your screencaps are the best.
Love ya.
1 of 7 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on June 6, 2009 1:33 PM
I've loved your recaps all season, Dogsnaxx. Brilliant job providing the snark for a mostly brilliant season of 24!!!
So many funny moments from the finale, you had me laughing the entire time. I hope you're back in January, when 24 takes Manhattan!!!!
2 of 7 | Posted by slumrville | Posted on June 7, 2009 9:21 AM
Dogsnaxx - Excellent recaps all season long! I thought this season was as good as the earlier ones.
I too am shocked that Kim Bauer can actually make a smart decision! Maybe some magical stuff happened after she named her baby Teri!
Bad Olivia is gone! (I saw the same actress as a rape victim on Law & Order: SVU and I felt no sympathy!! I guess that means she did a good acting job)
Prez Taylor does everything right! (as we all know a woman president would do!)
Looking forward to the next season.
3 of 7 | Posted by taxgirl | Posted on June 7, 2009 8:09 PM
Yay! The finale recap! Awesome job, DS! Love the screencaps too - you really have a talent for picking ones that are ripe for hilarity!
"who had to break into her luggage because she left her "electric toothbrush on." Is that what they're calling them these days?" - LOL! Couldn't believe Kim didn't bitch things up this time - go Kim! But stay away next season!
Glad to see Ho-livia get hers. Nasty, snide bitch. She was intolerable during the whole Kanin interrogation - I wanted to kick her in the hoo-ha.
Are you going to be doing recaps for other shows? Or is this it until January? I'll miss your wit if the latter is the case!
4 of 7 | Posted by jjnoza | Posted on June 7, 2009 9:27 PM
@ Everyone!
It's been an honor and a joy recapping the season for you all! It was a tremendous learning experience and a lot of fun when I was dealing with stupid tech issues and wanting to put my fist through the computer monitor!
I think I'm going to take a little break for the summer (19 weeks in a row of exposition heavy recaps are a lot!) But I hope to be back soon with another show (assuming Flipit hasn't disowned me because of my late finale! ;-) )
Hope you all have a great summer! It's been a lot of fun talking trash and enjoying the show with you guys!
5 of 7 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on June 8, 2009 7:31 AM
I meant when I WASN'T dealing with crazy tech issues!
6 of 7 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on June 8, 2009 7:33 AM
Awww! You'll be missed - but enjoy your break - you deserve it!
7 of 7 | Posted by jjnoza | Posted on June 8, 2009 8:55 AM