Juma has Olivia come sit down in front of the camera, letting the Prez know he has her and will cut out her eyes, her tongue, and then her head until the Prez opens the door! She immediately orders Bauer to open the door, but he won't do it. They bark at each other! Madame Prez has already lost a son and refuses to lose her daughter! But Jack won't budge...his job is to protect the Prez and there's nothing they can do for Olivia. Madame Prez asks Jack if he has children, and he tells her about Kim. She asks if he could do what he's asking of her if it were Kim out there (And every '24' fan in the world starts salivating at the mere thought of Kim Bauer butchered and killed!) He says no, of course, but he's not the Prez (or a fan of his own show, it seems). Her response: I AM the president, and I'm ordering you to open the door.

Jack gives in, and opens the door just as Juma is about to pierce Olivia's flesh. He is taken hostage and placed next to his old pal Senator Mayer who immediately says "Damn it Bauer, What have you done?!" Thanks producers! Any viewers who didn't already have a seething visceral hatred of Senator Dick-Head now have their final straw. Pretty Please can he be killed or at least pistol-whipped soon? I'll be the best boy ever!


pistolwhip
"Dear Jesus: Please do me a favor and get this Dick Head next to me pistol whipped by one of the Sangalese Terrorists! I promise to be a good boy, say my prayers every night, and go to confession every time I torture someone. Thanks! I love you! It's me, Jack!"

President Taylor tells Juma to let the others go now that he has her. Instead, he gives her a back-handed slap across the face that draws blood from her lip! Juma sneers at her and says that SHE does not give HIM orders! She glares at him as he tells his men to prepare the cameras for her statement. She asks him what statement that is, and he says "The last one you will ever give."


stressbreak
Forget the bloody lip! Homegirl is in DESPERATE need of one of her stress time mousse breaks! She can't command a room without volume, dammit!

Ba-Bum-Ba-Bum-Ba-Bum-Ba-Bum!

Wow! What a wild episode, eh? It was entertainment in it's purest form, but I really thought it took a LOT of suspension of disbelief with the whole "taking of the White House" thing. But then again, it's my job to be a cynical critic and piss all over the show for these recaps! What did you guys think?

Can't wait for next week!

24: President Strangelove or: How She Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Torture! Sections:  1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |  6  |  7  |  8  |  9  |  10  |  11 

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Comments (6)

slumrville:

Fantastic recap, Dogsnaxx! I nearly fell out of my chair at the pic of Bob Ross! And "Don't Tase Me, Bro!" BWAHAHAHA!!!

Any true fan of 24 will forgive just about anything as long as the story is solid. And this season has been FANTASTIC! That slap on Prez Taylor was like a punch to the gut. No other show on television packs this much tension, suspense and drama. I LOVE IT!!!

jjnoza:

"Any true fan of 24 will forgive just about anything as long as the story is solid. And this season has been FANTASTIC!"

Copy that! ;-)

Great recap, as usual! I was waiting for a Little Mermaid reference re: Agent Zombie Spice's little swim. The Bob Ross thing killed me too. Totally unexpected, and absolutely perfect.

I found it hard to believe that Agent DeadSlut discovered D-bag's warrant before Plum Puddin' did, yet PP was able to figure out what Chloe was up to this week, in mere minutes? As my mom would say, she (PP) could "eff up a wet dream".

Loved Jack's taser telephone temper tantrum. I think I need one of those - I bet tasing (sp?) a phone is much more satisfying than just hanging up on someone *cough my husband cough*.

Senator Dick-head has to go, and he has to go big. Dude is CLUELESS.

Taylor has balls, but for the love of God, please, no more Taylor O face screenshots. That's like seeing a parent's O face. :-P

Based on the preview for next week, I'm wondering if Juma taps some of the WH laundry staff - that flag looks suspiciously crease free, given it had to have been stuffed in a backpack.

Dogsnaxx:

@ Slumrville
I agree the season has been a LOT better than some of the past ones. Fortunately, some of the crazy/nonsensical leaps and action give me a little something to make fun of! I couldn't imaging trying to make fun of 20 minutes worth of dudes running through hallways with guns...oh, wait! That happened this week in the White House! haha.

@ JJnoza
I totally missed the Little Mermaid reference! Good call! I'm hoping having a single hour to focus on next week will let me zero in on some more of the little humorous moments. Also, can't wait until Mayer gets his. If Erika was DeadSlut...he's gotta be DeadDickHead...only a matter of time!

Memememe:

I agree that this season is improved over recent ones. But the White House being accessed by deep water divers landing at a catacomb system and blowing their way into the basement had me howling with laughter. The only water near the WH is a 3' deep reflecting pool filled with algae.

Part of what makes this show so suspenseful is that it's basically realistic. That ridiculous dank cave being wired with Matrix style red-beam alarms was just the stupidest thing I think I've seen all year.

Way to go! JACK. (I always say JACK using Ramon Salazar's voice. What are you going to do NOW. JACK.)

AlanHK:

I don't want to seem snarky, but there was a great selection of malapropisms in this recap:

--the new attack will be on his conscious.
--sneak a peak
--Once the hole gang is in the tunnel
--the beg attack gets underway
--the Attorney Genera's care
--Juma is coralling all his hostages

It does help to have an anally retentive friend look over your text before publishing it. Spellcheckers can't find that kind of error.

Anyway, I do agree with all your snarks at the show. "Worst.Use.Of.Split-Screen.Ever!" I was scratching my head at that too.

Otherwise the whole subtext of "torture is the RIGHT THING TO DO on any occasion for any reason", is starting to get to me. Jack seems like the torture evangelist. Renee and the Pres have already seen the light. Bill is the only hold-out, (unless Senator Dickhead somehow has to recant, though he'll probably be dead meat before that). Funny how Jack can be tortured by the Chinese for two years and not break a sweat, but he can magically extract the truth in literally minutes, from all kinds of hard cases, time after time. And why couldn't the senator's aide have just made up a target? He only had to fake them out for 10 minutes. How could Jack have known otherwise? Just because He's Jack.

And the whole idea of an actual president leading a terrorist raid while his own country is under attack, is so absurd in so many ways. Even if he survived (of course, he won't) he'd find himself deposed and executed should he return home.

And it always comes down to some Old White Guy as the Big Bad.

Prediction: Juma wil be in the limelight for the next hour, but dead by 9pm, when the mysterious "shipment" arrives (Ebola?), being the final threat of the night and Jon Voight reveals his nefarious plan to install the VP as his stooge.

Dogsnaxx:

@ Memememe

I agree w/ you 100%. After first watching the 2-Hr episode, I was left feeling confused. On the one hand, the action and stuff was juicy. On the other, It was all so unrealistic, it kind of took me out of the story. Went back and thought about it, and it really was deep water divers and underground tunnels that lost me. If they are going to take the FREAKIN' White House (unbelievable in and of itself) then couldn't you at least make their entrance plausible?

@AlanHK

Great predictions! I agree, but didn't call Juma getting taken out before 9pm. That was a good one. And just in time, after 13 episodes, I'm getting tired of the Sangala stuff. On to the big bad Blackwater stand in!

Sorry about the malapropisms. I can't guarantee there won't be more of them...but I'll be the first to admit I didn't spend my usual time and due diligence to editing this week. It was just focused on finishing.

Another great episode this week! I'm getting started on the recap now.

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