Burnett is still with Senator Dick-Head Mayer. Dick-Head, who hasn't even met with the President yet, is already maneuvering behind her back. He wants to release a statement about the hearings going ahead as planned, as well as sit down with a reporter off the record to suggest the President's judgement is impaired due to her highly emotional state (what with her husband being shot). The goal: make pardoning Bauer as politically toxic as possible for the Prez. Mayer has a hard-on for destroying Bauer. He's called away to have his sit down with the Prez, and Ryan phones Juma to let him know he's finally on his way out of the White House. Unfortunately, Jack comes in while he's gathering his belongings, tasers Ryan, and delivers a great line: "You and me, we're going to have a little talk." The talk's gonna have to wait for five minutes...'cuz we cut to break!
At FBI HQ, Larry is discussing some kind of important FBI HQ business or something. Janis knocks on his door and he waves her in, but continues his conversation. Janis is visibly antsy and vibrating with excitement! She either has something super juicy for Larry, or totally has to pee! My guess is a little of both. When Larry gets off the phone, she tells him she has something he needs to listen to and starts nervously breaking down all her problems with Chloe. Larry tells her to slow down, and she tells him that she detected evidence of file tampering and had Chloe's cell tapped because all of her calls were scrambled. She then plays him the recorded conversation Chloe had with Jack about Janis being onto her deleting Ryan's name! With no questions asked, Larry storms out of the office and has Chloe detained and pulled off the servers. As Chloe is led away by an agent, she shoots daggers at Janis, who has a self-satisfied look on her face. (Round 1 goes to Plum Puddin'!) Larry phones the White House to update them on this little bit of intel, while Janis goes to the FBI nurse's office to score a fresh pair of panties and purple leggings.
In the Oval Office, Madame Prez and Senator Dick-Head are having an intellectual debate regarding the merits of torture while Kanin sits by and listens. And by intellectual debate, I mean Pansy-Pants Dick-Head is all condescending and lectures her on the wrongness and immorality of it all. She tries repeatedly to get him to back off Bauer as a sign of "gratitude" for everything he had done today. But off course, Dick-Head has a hard-on for Bauer and won't let it go. As the "debate" reaches an impasse, a secretary pipes in that they have Larry Moss on the horn. Over the speaker phone, he informs the Prez, Kanin, and Dick-Head that he has reason to believe Jack Bauer is carrying on an "off book" interrogation of Burnett as they speak! Way to undermine the people pulling for you, Jack!
In another room...that "off book" interrogation is going on. Jack is tasing Burnett and demanding to know what's going on with the whole attack thing. Ryan, of course, plays dumb and says he doesn't know what Jack is talking about. Jack tells him he can pull the trigger 128 more times before the battery dies (haha). Ryan still plays dumb, so Jack removes a cartridge that ups the voltage by 40 times! Ryan says the wrong thing: "What do you want me to say, tell me what to say and I'll say it!" This gets Jack REALLY mad, and he tells Ryan he knows he's lying, and he better fess up! After all, Burnett built the federal case against Bauer and knows just how far he's willing to go. Finally, Jack threatens to tase Ryan in the neck, which runs the risk of paralysis. This gets Ryan singing like a canary...he starts to tell Jack about the military unit, but just before he tells him the location, President Taylor interrupts over the intercom!
She demands he answer the page. Bauer tells her about the new attack, but she's not hearing it. She'll have no discussion until door is open, Jack tries to convince her, but she reminds him he is breaking the law and as Commander in Chief, orders him to stand down. In frustration, Jack tasers the phone and goes back to interrogating Burnett! The president's military guards blow the door in and restrain Bauer while he screams "I had him!"
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Comments (6)
Fantastic recap, Dogsnaxx! I nearly fell out of my chair at the pic of Bob Ross! And "Don't Tase Me, Bro!" BWAHAHAHA!!!
Any true fan of 24 will forgive just about anything as long as the story is solid. And this season has been FANTASTIC! That slap on Prez Taylor was like a punch to the gut. No other show on television packs this much tension, suspense and drama. I LOVE IT!!!
1 of 6 | Posted by slumrville | Posted on March 7, 2009 8:37 AM
"Any true fan of 24 will forgive just about anything as long as the story is solid. And this season has been FANTASTIC!"
Copy that! ;-)
Great recap, as usual! I was waiting for a Little Mermaid reference re: Agent Zombie Spice's little swim. The Bob Ross thing killed me too. Totally unexpected, and absolutely perfect.
I found it hard to believe that Agent DeadSlut discovered D-bag's warrant before Plum Puddin' did, yet PP was able to figure out what Chloe was up to this week, in mere minutes? As my mom would say, she (PP) could "eff up a wet dream".
Loved Jack's taser telephone temper tantrum. I think I need one of those - I bet tasing (sp?) a phone is much more satisfying than just hanging up on someone *cough my husband cough*.
Senator Dick-head has to go, and he has to go big. Dude is CLUELESS.
Taylor has balls, but for the love of God, please, no more Taylor O face screenshots. That's like seeing a parent's O face. :-P
Based on the preview for next week, I'm wondering if Juma taps some of the WH laundry staff - that flag looks suspiciously crease free, given it had to have been stuffed in a backpack.
2 of 6 | Posted by jjnoza | Posted on March 7, 2009 1:21 PM
@ Slumrville
I agree the season has been a LOT better than some of the past ones. Fortunately, some of the crazy/nonsensical leaps and action give me a little something to make fun of! I couldn't imaging trying to make fun of 20 minutes worth of dudes running through hallways with guns...oh, wait! That happened this week in the White House! haha.
@ JJnoza
I totally missed the Little Mermaid reference! Good call! I'm hoping having a single hour to focus on next week will let me zero in on some more of the little humorous moments. Also, can't wait until Mayer gets his. If Erika was DeadSlut...he's gotta be DeadDickHead...only a matter of time!
3 of 6 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on March 7, 2009 3:29 PM
I agree that this season is improved over recent ones. But the White House being accessed by deep water divers landing at a catacomb system and blowing their way into the basement had me howling with laughter. The only water near the WH is a 3' deep reflecting pool filled with algae.
Part of what makes this show so suspenseful is that it's basically realistic. That ridiculous dank cave being wired with Matrix style red-beam alarms was just the stupidest thing I think I've seen all year.
Way to go! JACK. (I always say JACK using Ramon Salazar's voice. What are you going to do NOW. JACK.)
4 of 6 | Posted by Memememe | Posted on March 7, 2009 10:06 PM
I don't want to seem snarky, but there was a great selection of malapropisms in this recap:
--the new attack will be on his conscious.
--sneak a peak
--Once the hole gang is in the tunnel
--the beg attack gets underway
--the Attorney Genera's care
--Juma is coralling all his hostages
It does help to have an anally retentive friend look over your text before publishing it. Spellcheckers can't find that kind of error.
Anyway, I do agree with all your snarks at the show. "Worst.Use.Of.Split-Screen.Ever!" I was scratching my head at that too.
Otherwise the whole subtext of "torture is the RIGHT THING TO DO on any occasion for any reason", is starting to get to me. Jack seems like the torture evangelist. Renee and the Pres have already seen the light. Bill is the only hold-out, (unless Senator Dickhead somehow has to recant, though he'll probably be dead meat before that). Funny how Jack can be tortured by the Chinese for two years and not break a sweat, but he can magically extract the truth in literally minutes, from all kinds of hard cases, time after time. And why couldn't the senator's aide have just made up a target? He only had to fake them out for 10 minutes. How could Jack have known otherwise? Just because He's Jack.
And the whole idea of an actual president leading a terrorist raid while his own country is under attack, is so absurd in so many ways. Even if he survived (of course, he won't) he'd find himself deposed and executed should he return home.
And it always comes down to some Old White Guy as the Big Bad.
Prediction: Juma wil be in the limelight for the next hour, but dead by 9pm, when the mysterious "shipment" arrives (Ebola?), being the final threat of the night and Jon Voight reveals his nefarious plan to install the VP as his stooge.
5 of 6 | Posted by AlanHK | Posted on March 10, 2009 3:58 AM
@ Memememe
I agree w/ you 100%. After first watching the 2-Hr episode, I was left feeling confused. On the one hand, the action and stuff was juicy. On the other, It was all so unrealistic, it kind of took me out of the story. Went back and thought about it, and it really was deep water divers and underground tunnels that lost me. If they are going to take the FREAKIN' White House (unbelievable in and of itself) then couldn't you at least make their entrance plausible?
@AlanHK
Great predictions! I agree, but didn't call Juma getting taken out before 9pm. That was a good one. And just in time, after 13 episodes, I'm getting tired of the Sangala stuff. On to the big bad Blackwater stand in!
Sorry about the malapropisms. I can't guarantee there won't be more of them...but I'll be the first to admit I didn't spend my usual time and due diligence to editing this week. It was just focused on finishing.
Another great episode this week! I'm getting started on the recap now.
6 of 6 | Posted by Dogsnaxx | Posted on March 10, 2009 7:37 AM