Right before 24 started this week, I received the unhappy news that my rent might be going up next year. Now, this is grossly unfair because a) I'm more or less broke, b) the lease ends at the end of May, which would only give me a couple weeks to find a new place, and c) I'm pretty sure that less than a month's notice is illegal or something. So, my fellow 24 fans and I decided to be inspired by Jack Bauer and come up with fun ways to defeat the landlord. We could bite out her jugular. We could snap off her fingers with a cigar cutter. We could pop out an eyeball or two. We could hang her with a giant chain. Or, my personal favorite, electrocute her with a floor lamp. Oh, the possibilities! She'll cave in no time!
This week, after a solid two minute and fifty second recap of previouslies (soon the entire show will be one big recap of the season), we begin where we left off, with Jack in holding. He's making that sad, "My life is so hard" face that makes me want to cuddle with him until everything is all better. Nadia conveys the happy news that not only has Secretary Heller taken Audrey home with him, but he'll also be filing a restraining order against Jack. Yeah, that'll work. Jack can waltz in and out of consulates like it's his job, you think a little bit of paper is going to stop him from snuggling with your daughter? HA. I laugh at your ignorance, Mr. Heller.
"I think I left the oven on."
Nadia tells him that Audrey's information did in fact pan out, that teams are getting ready to storm the copper refining facility that they believe to be Cheng's base of operations. Jack says he wants to go with them, because he knows how Cheng thinks and he can track him better than anyone. I think this is a perfectly good argument, but Nadia is all hung up on these so-called "laws" and "due process". She says that he "willfully disobeyed a presidential order", which, hello Nadia? Do you even watch this show? He does that EVERY YEAR. Some people file their taxes, Jack disobeys presidential orders. IT'S TRADITION.
Jack keeps begging and puts forth all sorts of good arguments like this is a mess that he should be cleaning up, give him a chance to keep his word to the president, he wants revenge on Cheng, he loves the smell of floor lamp electrocution in the morning, etc. Nadia still says no. Nadia is the worst CTU director ever. Well, not as bad as Samwise Gamgee was, but she's still making terrible decisions. Jack, defeated for the moment, sits down quietly and asks if he can help from here. Nadia reminds us all that there is a replacement director coming soon, so she will take it up with him. Which brings me back to trying to figure out who the replacement director will be. Kim? Zombie Tony Almeida? BEHROOZ?!
We then flash over to the main CTU room, and Chloe is RIGHT THERE! How DARE they make us think she was slitting her wrists?! Milo asks her for something, and she relays the information in a monotone, annoyed voice, which is how she always talks, but Milo asks her if something is wrong. She says no, but Morris pipes up to say that she's pissed about their relationship, and that Milo should probably stay out of it. Milo agrees.
Nadia is briefing Mike "I like popsicles" Doyle and his team on the mission. She informs them that LAPD has set up a five block perimeter, so they should pretty much just be preparing for immediate failure. She dismisses them and wishes them good luck, then Mike pulls her to the side and tells her she's doing a good job. She tells him to be careful. Sparks fly, I guess. She watches him leave the room, and of course, there's Milo watching them, scheming and cackling and twirling his moustache.
"Hi Nadia! I'm plotting to kill everyone you've ever met! Call me!"
Cheng and his resident Nerdy Hipster are chatting it up. They're outfitting a team of guys for a mission, and while Hipster is somewhat doubtful about them, Cheng says he's used them before and they're quite good. He calls the Asian equivalent of Mike Doyle over and tells them that they're going to be attacking the target in fifteen minutes. I don't watch previews, but I can still predict with near-certainty that that target is going to be CTU.
« Look Ma! No Morals! | Main | You Better Piss On It »
Comments (4)
Thanks Screampillar for a great recap. I don't think I have laughed out loud at a recap since the boys abandoned the tvgasm ship. I love the "fuck you door" pic.
I'm with you - what is so special about the kid? GrandBauer is seriously obsessed with controling him.
I'm just glad this season is almost over. I can't figure out where this is going.
1 of 4 | Posted by gotogirl
|
Posted on May 10, 2007 11:24 AM
excellent recap! I laughed out loud, especially at "L'il Kim"
2 of 4 | Posted by paprika
|
Posted on May 10, 2007 12:13 PM
I think they brought Milo back this season so they'll have a familiar character to kill. If Zachary Quinto is killed in Heroes, maybe he'll be back in 24 next season to get killed like Milo.
3 of 4 | Posted by Radlum
|
Posted on May 10, 2007 4:26 PM
Yay! Milo is dead! It would have been funnier though if the Chinese dude shot him in the chin first.
4 of 4 | Posted by joyfulchicken
|
Posted on May 11, 2007 11:26 AM