They're barely out of their parking space (located in Section Vodka) when Markov gets on the horn with his BFF Gredenko. He dishes that the Americans have sent their little puppet Logan, and Gredenko is wicked pissed that Russia has been exposed in all this. All they wanted to do was blow some shit up and blame it on the Arabs! Is that so wrong?! Markov sneers that "they have no evidenccccce", otherwise they wouldn't have sent Logan, with his threats and accusations. And would it have killed him to bring a fruit basket?
"OMG did you catch idol last night?"
"Simon is such a jerk lol!"
Back in the car, Jack decides to stir shit up. He calls Chloe and tells her to disable power to the DWP server. Whatever that means. She is to knock out all power to the Russian consulate for 60 seconds, and make it look like a power failure. And, as always, this needs to be done under the radar. But only, you know, for like half the episode until Milo or Nadia or Katie the Random CTU Temp discovers her. And then she'll get in trouble but it turns out Jack was right all along so they'll forget all about it. Unless he ends up on a freighter bound for Russia. Eh, we'll just see what happens.
"Chloe, I forgot to TiVo Grey's, can you tape it for me?"
"Again?! FINE."
Logan can't believe Jack is thinking about breaking into yet ANOTHER consulate, and reminds him of the two years he spent in China as punishment for the exact same shenanigans. Jack smacks himself on the head and says, "Oh right, THAT'S where I was!" Logan asks Jack if he's really willing to risk it all over again. Jack's like, duh, I'm Jack Bauer. I risk things all day, every day, everywhere, on every continent. Brushing my teeth is risky because I do it with POISON.
Karen (remember her? I thought for sure she'd be dying in a fiery plane crash right about now) is hanging out in the Andrews Air Force Base cafeteria, looking bored and watching the news on her phone. She should order a Hot Pocket or something. The phone rings, and it's her hubby, perhaps looking for a little tele-afternoon delight? Nah, he's just calling to inform her of the assassination attempts and whatnot. Just as sexy, I think. Karen suddenly remembers that she's awesome and it would be wrong to deprive the President of her services, so she decides to go back and rescind her resignation. Imagine the amount of paperwork flying around that bunker. They must have one miserable underling stuck somewhere, filing and processing until the day he quits or, more likely, commits suicide.
Speaking of the bunker, Daniels is commanding his little blonde (whose name is Lisa, we find out) to make a distribution list for Lennox's proposal. She's surprised that he would try and pull this off so quickly, but he spouts the same crap he's been spouting this whole time, that it's for the good of the country, and, what's more, that they've been delaying this for far too long. Yeah, suspending civil liberties is really something they should have just snuck into the BILL OF RIGHTS.
Warden of Defense informs Daniels of the situation with Lennox, who happens to be spilling the beans at that very moment. He tells them everything, but leaves out that whole nasty business of his consent and involvement. The Secret Service guy totally doesn't believe him and even gives him a little snark, but just then Daniels enters and kicks everyone else out of the room. And for some reason I really wish Mike Novick were here to see all this. Imagine all the squinting he'd be doing. Think he'll ever be back?
Daniels, who really really resembles a bulldog, reveals his Evil Plan to blame this whole thing on Assad. Lennox tries to steer him away from this, but can't exactly do so without implicating himself in the process. He blows up a little but Daniels won't be swayed. Lennox says he can see exactly what he's doing - blaming Assad in order to push his new agenda. Daniels is all, yeah but um, you wrote the proposal, dingbat. Lennox reluctantly agrees with the plan, since he still believes that it's the best way to stop the attacks. But nothing will stop him from pouting about it. Nothing!
"Tell me Tom, am I too shiny?"
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Comments (17)
Screampillar, I thought your recap was great. Making 24 recaps funny is difficult, and I really enjoyed it. Keep it up! BTW, great call on the Russian Tom Lennox! Also looks like we FINALLY get to see Aaron and Martha next week! Woo hoo!
1 of 17 | Posted by Remy11
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Posted on March 8, 2007 11:18 AM
Good job Sreampiller! I particularly enjoyed the "Legends of the Hidden Temple" reference. Well done.
2 of 17 | Posted by Emilita33
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Posted on March 8, 2007 11:43 AM
Screampillar, you did a great job with this recap. There were lots of screenshots and snark...just the way I love my recaps!
And finally we got to see Jack cut off another appendage. Is that great TV or what??
3 of 17 | Posted by hardlyworking
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Posted on March 8, 2007 11:59 AM
"That finger will make a great addition to Jack's dismembered-appendages-of-foreign-diplomats charm bracelet"
Brilliant!
I think we can now rest, knowing '24' is in good hands.
4 of 17 | Posted by Firecat
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Posted on March 8, 2007 12:45 PM
And the 24 recap tradition lives on...
The American Idol caption absolutely killed me.
5 of 17 | Posted by parttimecynic
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Posted on March 8, 2007 1:34 PM
Great recap Screampillar!
Did you guys see the previews for next week? Martha is confronting President Pussy as AARON is sitting beside her all lovey-like! They totally hooked up. I knew it!
6 of 17 | Posted by Jojobear
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Posted on March 8, 2007 2:32 PM
I too, noticed that we will get to see Martha and her boytoy Aaron next week! Yay!
Great recap Screampillar!
7 of 17 | Posted by Jojobear
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Posted on March 8, 2007 2:34 PM
Sorry for my double posts, I thought I cancelled the first one. D'oh! It won't happen again!
8 of 17 | Posted by Jojobear
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Posted on March 8, 2007 3:49 PM
It has to be said -- why on EARTH was Jack walking toward the door at the end? Did he possibly think he was going to just walk right out? That was one of the most non-Jack Bauer moments I've ever seen out of him. Perhaps being in the field with Milo was too much for him?
9 of 17 | Posted by Deb
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Posted on March 8, 2007 7:38 PM
Excellent job, Screampillar. I'm very glad you're taking over the recaps.
Deb, I was thinking the same thing about Jack just strolling towards the door. Had he forgotten about the horde of angry Russian guards on the other side?
10 of 17 | Posted by brilliantmistake
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Posted on March 8, 2007 10:13 PM
LOL Crafty Bastard University !!! Will be thinking that line all day. Thanks Screampillar, you made my day. Loved this episode, loved the recap, loved the previews, but there's only 12 episodes left.
11 of 17 | Posted by Jules
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Posted on March 9, 2007 3:00 AM
yeah i agree - this recap was great! 24 is in good hands for sure :)
12 of 17 | Posted by your_therapeutic_smile
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Posted on March 10, 2007 1:00 PM
Great recap Screampillar! I admit I was reluctant at first but it was pretty amazing to read. Keep up the good work.
13 of 17 | Posted by Junzilla
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Posted on March 10, 2007 5:19 PM
YEAH SCREAMPILLER!! I'm new to TVgasm and became addicted to your recaps of Friday Night Lights. I'm so glad that you will now be doing 24! you are too funny! I love the screencaps!
14 of 17 | Posted by y2kcsc
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Posted on March 10, 2007 7:49 PM
wow great recap i laughed my rear off keep it coming :)
15 of 17 | Posted by rikkidbs
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Posted on March 12, 2007 6:24 PM
This might be a SPOILER but I might just be talking out of my ass. Anyway, Palmer 2.0 isn't going to die. The FCC prohibits the killing of a president on television. It's OK if the president is no longer in office or if it's the vice president, but the president himself can not be killed. I'm not sure why, but that's why the President was the only one who survived the Air Force One plane crash a couple seasons ago.
Just a little heads up.
16 of 17 | Posted by Sam
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Posted on March 13, 2007 4:24 PM
"She should order a Hot Pocket or something."
Hilarious. I was worried about what was going to become of this recap because the B-Side recaps of 24 are what got me to watch the show in the first place and I love this show and the snark-laden recaps more than life itself so it's good to know that the baton has been passed to a worthy successor - it was a much more seamless transition than the RW and Hills ones.
17 of 17 | Posted by BlondeGirl
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Posted on March 15, 2007 10:40 PM