Jack calls up Cheng, who has a cheery little cell phone ring. It's no "The Entertainer", but it does brighten up that whole international warmongering thing a little. Actually, it goes quite nicely with Cheng's cheerful disposition. No matter how mad or threatening he's trying to be, to me the lilting tones of his voice always suggest a bubbly personality. I half expect him to answer the phone, then cover up the mouthpiece and cry to Audrey in a happy little voice: "It's Jack Bauah!!" Anyway, Jack tells him that CTU is on to him so from now on they're doing things his way, and his way involves meeting at an abandoned hotel. Sexy.
Daniels barks some more at his minions and sends them off to find Jack and the chip. He's left alone with Lisa the Fembot, so he says, "I have the fate of the western world and the lives of millions of Americans hanging in the balance and...I can't stop thinking about you." And he proceeds to rub his bulldog face all over hers. EWW. Lisa says she's not sure this is appropriate behavior. Not sure? Do you need some sort of instructional video? Or do robots not understand these kinds of things? He tells her to call the media and tell them that the acting president is a dirty old man. I'm on the phone immediately. He asks her to spend the rest of the night, and she says she'll run home to pick up a change of clothes. I hope they involve some sort of chastity belt.
Aaaand millions of Americans vomit in perfect unison.
Mike finds the power lines where Jack ditched the tracking device, and asks Nadia what's up ahead. She tells him about two possible highways, and Mike determines that since one of them has cameras, Jack would know about those and would therefore take the other route. Looks like SOMEONE'S been watching his Blue's Clues! He tells Nadia to check phone logs, since he saw Jack take one of the dead terrorist's phones and thinks he could be using it to communicate with Cheng. Nadia tells Milo that Mike figured out where Jack was going, and Milo again acts all exasperated and sneaks off to further plan Mike's death.
Nadia hands off the phone log thing to Chloe, who sends it over to Morris. Morris starts complaining about this for no discernible reason, which triggers yet another Chlorris squabble. How were these two ever married? I'm guessing a lot of pot roasts went cold and uneaten between them. Milo tries out his very best Maury Povich and jumps in to intervene, so Chloe just sends the files for him to process instead of Morris. Morris jumps on this, saying she's getting close to Milo, then tells her to put down her complaints in a folder and then shove it. Wow, Morris just kind of won my heart. That lousy drunk is alllll right after all. Not that it's okay to mouth off to Chloe, but I don't think anyone on this show has ever told anyone else to shove it (though if anyone did, I'm guessing it was Tony Almeida). Morris snarks some more, then asks if there's anything else she'd like to put out there. "Stop arming bombs for terrorists," I joke to myself. "How about 'Don't arm nuclear bombs for terrorists?'" Chloe snaps. Wow. I just mind-melded with The Chloe. Cosmic.
Chloe realizes that she's gone too far, and tries to damage control by saying that's not how she really feels. Wise old Morris says he doesn't buy it, and stalks away, probably off to find a bottle of rubbing alcohol to pound.
"You're a terrorist!"
"Hah hah! Wait, what?"
Karen gets a call from the awesomely-named Peter Hawk. He's with the Department of Justice, and he wants to meet with her. She takes the three steps to find him in her office, which makes me wonder why he went through the trouble of calling her in the first place, but whatever. The White House can break all laws of physics. Why, in the past five minutes Tom has already gone back in time to save Wayne Palmer, cure cancer, and stop Sanjaya from ever auditioning. Hawk informs Karen that he's been interrogating Reed, who is apparently facing the death sentence for his actions, and as a result is singing like a whiny little canary in hope of leniency.
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Comments (2)
The "We have a spy" thing is getting old...
I'm still cleaning up the vomit at my home...
Alot has to happen in the next few hours...like it always does!
Great recap!
1 of 2 | Posted by dw17
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Posted on April 25, 2007 11:28 AM
This was one of the best recaps I've ever read, absolutely hilarious. Thank you!
2 of 2 | Posted by kylie
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Posted on April 25, 2007 3:30 PM