90210: There's A She Wolf In Annie's Closet

This week on 90210, Kelly's back, Jen's not and EmoAnnie's spine grows 3 inches in a day! In other news, Mones gets jury duty. Rejoices over not having to go to work.

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Cause I still get paid suckas!

West Bev. Harry yells at Dixon for punching Matt Mark the guy who boned EmoAnnie for no reason. Harry wonders what Dixon's violent tendencies will do the reputation of the family. Big D doesn't know. Why not ask Tits McGee?

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Look on the bright side, Harry. She may be branded a whore forever, but you only fail as a parent once.

Out in the hall, Dixon runs into Silver with a box of his stuff. He looks through it and finds a horror movie. He tells her to keep it; he hates horror movies. She wonders about all the ones they went to. Turns out she picked all the movies they saw, and everything else they did too. He was never really himself around her. That and the writers never showed they had anything in common, nor did the actors have an ounce of chemistry together. But I'm just observant nitpicking.

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Go to your happy place, Dixon.

EmoAnnie runs into Simi in the parking lot, literally. He helps her with her books and recognizes her...from somewhere. Somewhere specific. Hmm. What is a tennis tournament? Far superior Canadian teen drama? High School Neanderthal #2 reminds him by snapping a pic of her with his phone. He tells her not to sweat it. People will be ruining some other poor sap's life by tomorrow.

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The beaver shots didn't take too long now, did they?

She heads over to her locker as people stare and laugh. Someone's painted a scarlet letter SLUT across it. A for effort, D for creativity. Liam walks up. EmoAnnie blames him for the graffiti even though he didn't do it. But he might as well have. Silence is not always golden.

Outside, Silver fumes over her encounter with Dixon. Naomi and Silver look about as bored as I am with the subject. EmoAnnie walks up and confronts Naomi about the picture. How could Naomi do that after she begged her not to? More importantly, how could she wear those ugly earrings? Naomi tells "Meryl" to save the scene for her acting reel. She never saw the pic before today.

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"Plus, I'm contractually obligated to wear these Paula Abdul for QVC earrings. So back off!"

The Blaze. Borianna responds to Navid's text. He wants her opinion on the new piece he's working on. It's a faux interview with himself in which he apologizes for being a macho pig of AC Slater proportions. It's all very schizo and completely creepy, but she falls for it nonetheless.

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Would you? I didn't think so.

EmoAnnie cleans the graffiti off her locker. Silver comes over to help. She knows Naomi is acting crazy towards her but it's because she's psycho over Liam. I'm sensing a theme. Naomi's strong but Liam is her one weakness. Well Liam and high humidity. It's called Frizzease, homegirl. Silver wants to be both their friend. She can't have it both ways. Naomi sent the pic and as God as Annie's witness, she'll never go hungry again! And she'll prove Naomi did it, too.

Out in the parking lot, Matt Mark the guy who boned EmoAnnie tells her about getting punched by Dixon and him going down like a 6-year-old girl. Maybe they shouldn't be talking. Annie tells him it's his fault, he took the picture. He has to help her. He agrees, but it will cost her.

Is it me or does Annie need to take a little responsibility for getting drunk with a guy she didn't know? Just sayin'.

The Blaze. Silver Dixon fumes over her encounter with Dixon Silver. It was all about her. Her music, her movies, her psychosis. The next girl, though, will be a female Dixon. An adopted, mouth-breathing black surfer?

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Simi pops in to invite the guys to a party on his dad's yacht on Saturday. Dixon tries to make an excuse to get Navid out of it, but Navid accepts the invite. Didn't Navid hate him last episode? Still does, but Borianna likes him and Navid <3s Borianna. So, in an effort to not piss her off again, he'll be BFFs with Simi. It's a completely brilliant plan with zero chance of failure.

Dixon heads out before Rumer and the rest of The Blaze staff shows up. Navid forgot to order pizzas for the meeting and bribes Dixon into getting them by letting him borrow his yellow monstrosity, which I learn is a Lamborghini.

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Comments (3)

sanen85:

Hilarious, as always. I thought I was the only one cheering on Annie (silently, because frankly I don't care enough about this show/character to waste my breathe like I do with other shows). If I were her, I wouldn't speak to Adrianna, Naomi, or Silver after the truth comes out. They're horrible friends, especially Silver, who I'm pretty sure Annie didn't do anything to and stuck by her during her BSC period.

germgurl:

Hahaha, thanks for being the humorous sugar cube to sweeten up this bitter show... I watch it for the fashion mainly, but this episode got me thinking we might be in for good comedy. 13-years old Dixon as a music "exec"? LOLOLOL
About Teethy: She reminds me of this obnoxious date that Deacon brought to the Company Golf Day on King of Queens (my all time fav show btw).
My sentiments are Carrie's exactly ;)

mones:

sanen85: i agree. annie against the world is one i can definitely get behind, except for the snotiness against her parents. what did they do?

germgurl: "good comedy" is a stretch :-) but i did chuckle a couple of times. but i don't know if it was when the writers intended. don't watch KoQs but i'll look out for that ep in reruns.

thanks for reading guys!!!

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