After some uber obvious flirtation in front of Debbie, they get her to leave and head upstairs to check out Annie's dress for the party. She's looking wonderfully emaciated and Lucille remarks that you could crack on egg on her ass. No surprise there, Lucille, as the girl is literally skin and bone. The coccyx makes for a perfect egg-cracking protrusion when you don't eat.
Over at the club, Ethan is spilling the beans about George and Dixon's fight, which turns into a fight between them, I'm not sure why. He leaves and she runs after him, leaving Bangs the opportunity that she was looking for to snatch the purse. Here's an idea, just pawn the humongous Chanel purse. That'll surely bring in some bucks.
At school the next day, everyone is mooing at Annie. Oh beans, they must have found out about her moonlighting as a zoophile. Actually, what everyone's referring to is Silver's blog. Today's special: a video of Annie and a cow, with Annie talking about being a back-stabbing bitch. I must have missed the scene where Annie slept with Silver's boyfriend or keyed "loser" into her car. Silver tells Annie that Naomi is the antichrist, which makes me think there may be some bad blood there, and Annie totally comes back with a wicked cool return about how at least Naomi didn't confirm everyone's suspicions that she was actually dating a cow.
Oooooh. Burn. That poor cow must feel like a total chump right now.
In the principal's office Ethan is being grilled over the fight that took place the day before. True to jock form, he lies through his teeth and blames it all on Dixon. Needless to say, principal dad is none too pleased. Dixon is kicked off the team and probably out of the family, too.
Dixon and Annie are mega bummed over this and Dixon says that because their dad played lacrosse, and he's good at it, sometimes its like their really father and son. Aww, that's sweet, but let's not make that mistake again. Because you're not.
Annie is having a tough day. She confronts Ethan in the hall for being a turd and lying about her brother, then she heads off to class where Naomi reads her paper aloud to the class. The only problem is, its Annie's paper, verbatim. Snap? Annie is not cool with this, until Naomi tells her that because she was such a good friend, she went and bought her the dress that she loved. Aaaand things are cool again.
We're treated now to a montage of Silver trying to make amends with Annie at play rehearsal while Dixon creepy stalks Ethan and Naomi. It's both hilarious and weird. Dixon takes out his phone and texts Naomi "Ethan is cheating on you. You know it's true!" Ohmigod, scandal! Although, I'm doubly creeped out now, how did he get Naomi's phone number? Does Annie even has Naomi's number yet? Has Dixon been skipping his Stalkers Anonymous meetings?
When Bangs is done belting out "Momma", the teacher tells them its feeling a little thin and they need to thicken it up. Silver suggests they put Annie in, since she's been singing along the whole time. Ooh, thanks, but putting Skeletor in would actually negate the whole thickening thing. Plus, just because she's singing along on the side doesn't mean homegirl can actually sing. Trust me kid, give up your dreams. I used to want to be a professional grilled cheese maker when I was three - imagine if I had tried to see that one through...
But, no one ever listens to Pach, and Annie joins in and blows them all away with a whole lot of spirit fingers and arm waving. She joins in the chorus and clearly her and Silver are friends again. The principal is waiting in the wings to ask why Naomi handed in her paper. See kids? Cheaters never prosper.
Get off my ass. Did you see my spirit fingers?
Naomi and Annie are sitting in the principals office and Naomi berates her for spilling the beans. They go back and forth and Annie is informed that she is no longer invited to the super sweet 16. If I were Naomi I'd be a little less worried about her crashing my party and a little more worried about THE EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLAR DRESS. SERIOUSLY.
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Comments (13)
I'm so glad that you saw that Naomi looks like Elizabeth Berkley! For me she's a cross between Peyton from One Tree Hill and I was thinking Jesse Spano but now that you mention it, Nomi Malone works a lot better.
Am I the only one that thought it was weird that Annie had matches from the restaurant in San Francisco? First, why would she even keep the matches? Second, what restaurants give out matches these days anyway?
1 of 13 | Posted by chickadee2586 | Posted on September 6, 2008 6:49 PM
annie, naomi, and silver were ALL scary skinny. i just wanted to give them some sandwiches
2 of 13 | Posted by preppyboy | Posted on September 7, 2008 7:18 AM
ugh how annoying and goody goody is Annie- not digging her character at all. Or her as an actress.
3 of 13 | Posted by brittemik | Posted on September 7, 2008 3:02 PM
Oh, Pach how I love you! I'm loooong time reader/first time poster and have enjoyed your other recaps, but your reference to Buster's Charlie Browns finally moved me to create an account.
There are very few people that I come across who can spot veiled references to my all time fave, Arrested Development. When I run into another fan, I am usually so moved by their ability to match my obsessive quoting that I can't contain myself and the interaction inevitably ends awkwardly with my attempt at laying a big ol' kiss right on their mouth.
So, in order to save us both the embarassment - I will just extend my hand and give you a secret made up handshake (and a special Lucielle eye wink- "please don't ever make that face again"), offer you a frozen bananna (with nuts, if you like), insist that you work Buster's charlie browns/linus into every recap, and then ask you to be my best friend forever!!
Please consider at least one of the last two on the list :)
P.S. I am totally loving 90210 so far, well as much as you can enjoy watching unfortunate, malnourished refugee campers parade around in expensive clothes. I was glad to see that Kelly apparently kept some of that baby weight though! Also, WTF was up with Brenda's teeth?!?! Were those dentures or something? Or am I just not remembering S.D.'s massive ass gapped teeth? Watch that part at the Pit when she and Kelly first meet... it looks like she forgot to use poly grip and those suckers are pop right out any second!
Keep up the great work Pach! Can't wait to read the next one :)
4 of 13 | Posted by No touching!! | Posted on September 7, 2008 8:37 PM
Writer session #1:
Ok, so Brenda and Brandon were twins...what is the opposite of twins?
An adopted black brother and goofy white girl sister.
Totally original!
5 of 13 | Posted by amberpdidit | Posted on September 7, 2008 10:08 PM
Thanks for the great recap!
Just a side note...I really did not like the Andrea Zuckerman character on 90210, in high school she was ok, but then it got worse. However...when Hannah was on TV this episode - I think it was either the teacher or someone else in the class - said something to the effect of "she looks 30"...that right there made me laugh out loud.
6 of 13 | Posted by LNNC92 | Posted on September 8, 2008 11:23 AM
i know people had their criticisms of the premiere, but i enjoyed it. it held my interest for both hours. and i loved the homage they paid to the original series. i was a sucked for it.
however, that drug addict girl (i don't even care enough about her to remember her name) is the WORST storyline in the history of television. okay that's probably hyperbole, but they need to do something with that asap.
other than that, DYING to see jason priestley get on this show so we can find out how brandon and kelly conceived this kid. and NEED luke perry. NEED.
7 of 13 | Posted by baymenxpac | Posted on September 8, 2008 1:31 PM
Excellent recap! I absolutely loved the Arrested Development references; made my day.
I was kind of annoyed that Shenae Grimes was set to play Annie. Her character on Degrassi, Darcy, was also a goody goody and seriously annoyed me, so that was a huge downside.
I freaked right out when Jessica Walters showed up, and then Shannen Doherty. I mean, I knew she was coming on the show (thanks, Perez!) I just didn't realize it would be so soon. Just to add on to the AD refs, does anyone else think Naomi looks a teensy bit like Charlize Theron? Anybody?
I only have one criticism; I am sick of hearing negative things about girls' bodies. You're fat if you're above a size 4, and a skeletor if you're below. It's getting pathetic and a little annoying to see in a recap so enjoyable to read.
All in all, great job and I'll look forward to your next.
8 of 13 | Posted by alex_w | Posted on September 8, 2008 2:28 PM
I found the premiere somewhat boring and struggled to pay attention a lot of the time... so far I like Naomi, and Dixon's all right, but I'm not feeling Annie or Ethan yet. And sign me up for the WTF club with the emo pill-popper. I'll give it another episode or two, mostly for the original alums, and I hope it improves!
However, the recap was great and welcome back, Pach!!!
9 of 13 | Posted by LoLo | Posted on September 8, 2008 4:57 PM
Naomi was an awful actress. But I will still watch!
10 of 13 | Posted by RLR123 | Posted on September 9, 2008 10:11 AM
Awesome Recap especially for a two hour long show! The girl playing Annie needs to go. Maybe pull a Roseanne/Becky Conner move.
Was anyone else confused on why the Peach Pitt...oh sorry excuse me..."The Pitt" is tripling as a coffee shop, club and a restaurant. I live over on the East coast is there only one restaurant/club/coffee house in LA?
11 of 13 | Posted by Baxter | Posted on September 9, 2008 10:24 AM
Er, Chickadee, lots of places give out matches, especially high end restaurants. And I don't smoke but I always take matches from nice restaurants - sort of as a souvenir I guess. I wouldn't call it odd.
12 of 13 | Posted by Spring | Posted on September 17, 2008 9:12 PM
Yeah, so I'm watching this episode now on the CW's website. Just so you know, it's being sponsored buy O.B. tampons. If only O.B. could absorb my pain right now . . .
13 of 13 | Posted by hypnotoad | Posted on September 20, 2008 11:44 AM