One of my favorite moments of the season?! Cara and Jaime choose the 400 meter challenge which Michael Phelps won the gold in, and Cara says, "We have to beat Michael Phelps' time." To which Jaime snaps "No we don't." To which Cara replies "Ok - well we'll just try." WHAT?!? In what world does she live in that those two would even dream of beating that record?!? LOVE IT! She doesn't even say "OK Jaime" - no - she still insists they should "try". Yeah. Good luck!
Victor and Tammy continue their losing streak while Tammy yells, "I have no idea what we're doing wrong!!" Cut to Victor jumping off the board and into the pool while Tammy stands on her board watching him. Aces kids!
Meanwhile the Chinese discover what exactly has been up the cheerleaders' asses this whole race.
Kisha and Jen finally make an attempt at the sync jump but then they both chicken out and head for the 400m challege. Wise choice! Speaking of the 400m...
You're SO CLOSE Cara! You'll beat his record yet!
Kisha starts to put on her razor suit and complains they're not made for people with her sized thighs. GUUUURRLLL you betta work it then! Grease those bitches up and slide 'em in!
However, thanks to them doing this challenge I'll always have one of my fav Amazing Race quotes of all time. Jen referring to Kisha's dive...
'Nuf said.
While Victor and Tammy are busy resorting to cannon balls in the pool, Jaime decides to unleash a fury of bitchiness on Cara...
Seriously?! If I was Cara, nothing would inspire me to swim fast back across the pool more than hearing this. Because I would then get out of the pool and beat the razor suit right off her.
Even Margie comments that Luke is swimming too slow. Yikes. Who would've thought that a swimming challenge would get teams to start tearing into each other?!
Finally, Cara and Jaime finish first (dammit) and get the clue for the Pit Stop at Drum Tower. Meanwhile, Kisha and Jen give up again and decide to go back to the first challenge. I haven't seen 2 people fuck themselves over this bad since McCain and Palin agreed to let Palin interview.
Luke and Margie finish the challenge about 1 minute before Margie takes Fall #2 for the season. That razor suit looked like it was choking her body to death. Geez. Her health stresses me out.
The big moment finally comes where Kisha and Jen take the dive! At this point I feel like Jen's gonna turn into a Gremlin when she hits the water. They jump! Aaaannnd...
Uhh... she knows she can't breath under water right?! Oh dear.
Luckily for them Tammy and Victor keep fucking up.
Because judging by Kisha's reaction to their score - they're not going anywhere anytime soon.
Ugh. It does break your heart that Kisha is trying so hard to be a good sister and get Jen to jump as well. Although teaching her to swim like 20+ years ago would've been a good idea to. I'm just saying. They jump - it's awful. And Tammy and Victor switch to the 400m!!! Holy shit! They're all gonna be like 3 days behind the other two teams!
At the lap pool, Victor preps himself by saying, "You gotta swim and not sink!". He should seriously look into motivational speaking. Genius.
Jen starts having a total melt down and says she wants to go home. OY. If I was Kisha I'd be like, "Of course you can go home sweetie... but first... YOU'LL SWIM IN THE FUCKING POOL AND WIN ME A MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS!!! Looooove you!"
Tammy and Victor end up doing well in the 400m (morons - you should've done it first!) and head off to the pit stop. Kisha finally gets Jen up and they head back to the challenge. Meanwhile Margie gloats in the cab about the sisters crapping out on the swim challenge. Eww... come on Margie - you're better than that!
While back at the pool it looks like the gruesome end of the Titanic, Victor's legs start to cramp up while trying to get in the cab. He starts yelling in pain and sweet Tammy says, "Well can you put them in the car?!" Loooove her! Man up Victor! Still, it has to be one the funniest things to watch though! "AAAAGH!" Hysterical.
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Comments (12)
tammy and victor have no more advantage then the teams that can speak spanish in the past seasons. I really don't like margie and luke, she is always plaing the victim card
1 of 12 | Posted by carol | Posted on May 3, 2009 10:47 AM
Hilarious!!!!!!!! Loved the Queen cap/pic and Jamie giving birth to a horned baby. Maybe the doc could just jerk it out by it's tail! Thanks for the recap, Yield coming up and Marge and Luke have already used theirs. Should be interesting. I'm very over M&L, he's such a panty waste bitch. I like K&J and V&T. I really hope K&J win, but almost all of the teams have been "Ugly Americans".
2 of 12 | Posted by soapboxx | Posted on May 3, 2009 11:17 AM
It seems like everybody is trying to make Cara and Jaime look good. I think Kisha and Jen's remarks were WORSE than anything Jaime's said--but they weren't to anybody's face, anyway.
Luke has got to get away from his mama if there is to be any hope of his ever growing up.
I like the way Phil had the foresight to protect his face with the clue when he told Cara and Jaime the bad news!
3 of 12 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on May 3, 2009 11:26 AM
I am rooting for Team Kisha and Jen well anybody except Margie and Luke. I really hope Luke & Margie don't win - their both equally ridiculous!!!
4 of 12 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on May 3, 2009 11:45 AM
This line made me laugh (under the picture of Victor jumping):
"At least Victor nailed the "YMCA" before hitting the water." He did. He did.
Oh, and you know he liked running around in that skimpy speedo.
I'm rooting for Victor and Tammy cause us gays gotta stick together but since two of the other teams have gays too...
No, I can't root for Luke and Margie because Luke's a bitch (and not in a good way) and I can't root for Kisha and Jen cause those comments WERE racist and I can't root for the redheads cause one of them is the DEVIL.
Uh, maybe they should start the race over and bring back all the ousted teams?
Thanks for the good recap BBITZ.
5 of 12 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on May 3, 2009 1:44 PM
I'm still a sucker for mom/son teams. Go Margie & Luke!!
6 of 12 | Posted by Clair | Posted on May 3, 2009 3:11 PM
It's getting hard to know who to root against, anymore. I think the father-son team was the last one I consistantly felt like cheering for.
I did feel sorry for the sisters... it took some serious grit to jump off the board when you were that scared.
Luke's behavior was just wrong... and his mother share responsiblity for his immaturity.
ROFL when Phil flashed the Clue at the cheerleaders.
7 of 12 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on May 3, 2009 5:38 PM
I was watching this episode with my saintly little old mother when she turned to me and said "That deaf kid is kind of a douch". LOL Mom.
8 of 12 | Posted by IsabellaTheCat | Posted on May 3, 2009 7:16 PM
Isabella - your mom rocks!
9 of 12 | Posted by carol | Posted on May 3, 2009 9:38 PM
"The Deaf kid is Kind of a douch!" I would have died hearing that fro a little old lady. Funniest thing I have heard in a while.
Great recap! I had to contain my laughter several times because I am at work.
I can't believe some of the things that have come out of these people's mouths.
Sure does make for some funny ass tv!
10 of 12 | Posted by v_cap | Posted on May 4, 2009 10:00 AM
Put me squarely in the "Anybody But Margie & Luke" category at this point.
For a deaf kid, he runs his mouth a lot of kicking ass, etc., the hides behind mommy's skirt whenever there is a challenge.
I have been the kiss of death for each team I've started rooting for. It's making me think about rooting for M&L, but I can't do it.
I guess it's Vicky and Tammy for me.
11 of 12 | Posted by patbone21 | Posted on May 4, 2009 2:45 PM
Loved the captions on this recap! Jamie and Cara need to go!Thanks for a great recap!
12 of 12 | Posted by jglau78 | Posted on May 4, 2009 4:48 PM