Great recap.

Funniest fuckup ever. They have no excuse because they saw that demon #2 was scarfing that crap down at light speed.

Definitely rooting for the siblings at this point. The idea of either of the other two teams winning just turns my stomach.

Stopping to pee was dumb. I'd have just peed myself on national television. However, I was impressed at how compassionate and loving the two sisters were towards each other. An interesting contrast to Luke and Margie, wasn't it?

Great recap. Twat waffle will be officially added to my vocabulary.

I agree that the sibs have a HUGE advantage. To spend this amount of time in one country, at this stage of the race is unfair. I have to think that the application for the show asks "what countries have you visited" and "do you speak a lanuage other than English".

I love how the contestants show people the clue and get pissed that that the Chinese people don't know the answer. Unless the clue is written in Chinese symbols (instead of English letters), how are they going to understand the clue?

Luke is really getting on my nerves. Way to step up and have your mother complete another hard challenge pal. She could win this race on her own.

LOL, fantastic recap! I nearly peed my pants laughing! (See, Jen, it's easy!) Twat waffle is a new one to add to my vocabulary. I love it.

The gnome's commentary kicked ass. Victor is the funniest contestant in this race and he doesn't even know it.

"I'd pay GOOD MONEY to see Jaime forced into the waiter challenge." And I'd have paid good money to see Victor dressed as the princess and Tammy as the gentleman. That would have been pure awesome.

And the Adam Lambert comment was spot on. :)

If I were Kisha, Jen and her bladder would never live their impromptu potty trip down. I'd be sitting next to her at 89 in the rocking chair going, "We could have had a million dollars, you know. Naked men feeding us grapes by the poolside, face lifts, butt lifts, tummy tucks -- we'd have looked like LaToya and would be living it up at Sunny Beaches Retirement Bungalows. But, no. You had to stop and pee. And you are still peeing in your diapers, woman!"

Jaime is an utter cow. I'm still waiting for the first death-by-cabbie on reality TV.

Very funny!

I must say, I was hoping that the redheads would lose- Jaime's awfulness is shadowing Cara's coolness by now- but Jen stopping to pee.... really, that was stupid enough to deserve them being eliminated. And hopefully made fun of it for years to come.

Though for the first time in this episode (I think) this season I heard a team use broken Spanish when they were lost! I think the redheads, might've been the sisters, they definitely said 'donde' when searching. I can finally check it off my list of AR standards.

Tammy&Victor ftw! They're the only ones I can stand anymore.

I would totally have had pee running down my legs to get to that mat before those cheerleader hoes!! Especially with those long costumes on to hide it. There's no shame in doing the pee-pee dance for a million bucks! No matter how much I love my sister, I would have been draggin' her ass to get her there.

And, yeah, it does seem like they've spent an awful long time in China. But, as T&V mentioned last week, if the cabbies don't know where something is, it doesn't help that they know the language. Agreed that they should pick more neutral territory in future...um, Siberia perhaps (Sarah Palin can keep an eye on them).

Wow. Just... Wow. I think we've got ourselves a true Reality TV Hall of Shame winning team with Keisha and Jen; after all, it isn't every day someone literally pisses away a million dollars. (Especially since the teams're going to need to drag a pig to a Hawaiian luau, something that their physical strength would have given them an advantage on.)

I never watch the full coming next week previews for the final episode but I caught the beginning.

They are in Hawaii and Jamie and Cara are in a cab, yelling at the guy, and the cabbie's female boss is on speakerphone going "tell your people I am not their personal concierge" LMAO

She should have just peed in the pool! Kisha and Jen deserve to lose. First they are a mess in the water. all that stupid bitch had to do was pull herself (life jacket and all) along the lane lines! Duh! then the whole pee thing...they deserved to Lose.

I ans glad that the three that made it, made it. They are friggin hillarous. Luke yelling at margie is great. the asian "sisters" Victor and tammy kill me in their own too smart for their own good ways and of course Beauty and the Beast Red heads are a total crack up.

I love the recaps, I too get to add new terms to my dirty word vocab each and every week!

Peace out Twat Waffles!

Uh, it's a million dollars. She couldn't "hold it" a few more seconds?

Kisha really is a very nice sister. Jen's lucky to have her.

It DOES seem like they've been in China for a long, long time. If it's given Victor and Tammy an edge I'm okay with that.

I do remember a few season back when the hippie boys won, they were in Japan towards the end of the race. One of the guys not only had been to Japan but was fluent, so we do get people fluent in the language of the country they are in from time to time. However if I was on the race and not Tammy and Victor, I probably wouldn't think it was fair either. I wonder if they plan where they are going before they pick their contestants.

I'm sure they have to settle everything that is going to happen like which legs are non-elimination, what the tasks are going to be, where they are going to go, any "twists", etc. I am sure it is just like Survivor... they have all of the info for the season filed away so that they can't get sued later for cheating in favor of any particular player(s).

Yes, the Chinese thing is an advantage... but so is being a track star! Seriously. Or someone who runs 10 miles a day. Or someone who does a job where they have to lift heavy things regularly. All of those skill sets would give you an advantage in the game. Shit... a high level of reading comprehension gives a big advantage! Look how many people have been screwed over all of the seasons simply because they didn't read the clue properly. I don't think the Chinese thing is particularly unfair, to be honest.

Great recap. Chinese thing? Totally unfair. Probably fewer Chinese speak English than any other country. Add to that the fact that Chinese is a very difficult language and it just gives V&T too much advantage. Notice they were ahead the whole China trip. I couldn't believe Jen wouldn't just pee herself. Gawd! Someone on Big Brother peed theirself in a challenge and I don't even remember who it was! OMG check in then PEE! If only she'd had a twat waffle she could have made it high and dry. I'm going for Cara and Satan for the win because I can't stand M&L (he's a lil' bitch and she's an enabler), and T&V don't need the money. I mean they are high paid Cali lawyers, I'm sure they make six figures, sooo SATAN FOR THE WIN!

Great recap - and quick, too!

Here's my conspiracy theory about China and TAR... I figure the Chinese gave Phil a huge under the table bonus to showcase their country... and to make sure that a Chinese ancestry team finishes first.

That all probably went down before the world's economy stopped to take a whiz.

Well, Victor and Tammy were a top team before they got to China, so I hardly think the race is fixed.

Sorry, I pretty much hate Margie. After all, she is the one who made Luke what he is today. And she has acted pretty immature and vindictive herself--and even to Luke. I'm not fan of his, but the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, especially when the umbilical cord is still attached. Wow, way to mix a metaphor.

I guess we know now that Jaime isn't bigoted against any particular ethnic or language group--just cabbies. She doesn't even care if they speak English.

Twat waffle sounds cute and kind of fun. Can I be one?

If Cara and Jaime win I will not longer watch this show.

Chinese (yes, I know there are many different dialects) is the most widely spoken language in the world. Why are people upset that a team on the race speaks another language besides Spanish? No one says anything when a team is tossing Spanish around in a Spanish speaking country.

Carol, not mad because they speak Chinese or that the race went to China... (it easily could have been that T&V didn't make it to this leg), but to spend 3 episodes and two complete legs in China seems like overkill.

They were in India for that long last season. *shrug* No one had a cow over it then.

Ok so let me clarify, my beef with the whole Tammy & Victor, China/Chinese thing is this. I just think it was a poor choice on the casting director / producers' part to cast 2 people that had just recently been to China (specifically the places where the race was taking place) and spoke fluent Chinese. I think it's GREAT they speak another language. I think it's GREAT that they travel. Just don't pick a team that has a clear advantage like that unless you change the destinations then. I mean come on, they didn't HAVE to go to Beijing - it's a big country - find somewhere else. And they didn't HAVE to have TWO challenges to do with language (one with writing & one with speaking). And they didn't HAVE to make a BIG part of the race be in that country. And if those things are decided before the casting, then don't choose a team with such a clear advantage over everyone else. I mean, if they spent the last 3 episodes in a country where people ONLY spoke sign language and were all deaf, and 2 challenges had to do with speaking sign language - people would go CRAZY! It's the same thing.

And I know people have made comparisons to seasons before when people spoke Spanish. However, Spanish is more widely known (there was always more than one team that spoke Spanish) and there are many countries that speak Spanish (unlike China/Chinese).

I just think the show's more interesting and fair when it's an even playing field for everyone. I like Tammy and Victor and they're my favorite to win but they truly had an unfair advantage.

When Tammy and Victor first got to China, I thought their knowledge of the language and the country would be a huge advantage, but it didn't help them when they had to dive/swim.
I think that if the producers determine the locations and activities in advance, then it is not fair to exclude people just because they have traveled there and/or know the language. Tammy and Victor have been a consistently strong team since the start of the race. Jaime and Cara could know the language and they would still be a poor team because they are navigationaly-challenged (among their many challenges.)
If Tammy and Victor had not been selected simply because they knew the language, it would have been unfair. This may have been their only opportunity to try out for the show.

bB, they went to Bejing, because the Chinese governement had just spent an assload of money building the new Olympic stuff there and wanted to show it off. V&T went to the Olympics as did a lot of other people. It isn't really much of a conspiracy. Now, I might agree more if V&T were coming in at the back of the pack every week and then suddenly were in the lead in China, but they have been one of the top couples almost every time from the beginning. In fact, I think they have won more legs than anyone else this season. The only one where I remember them not being in the top few was when Victor went on his long walk in the woods.

And when they were in Brazil, one of the couples spoke Portuguese. But they still lost. ;-)

But it is like I said before, there are a lot of skillsets that give you an advantage in the game. Kisha and Jen were athletes and could run really fast. That good looking guy withe the bossy girlfriend practically lifted a car by himself when he was moving that gypsy family. To me, high endurance would be the biggest skillset you could have. Look at this season and the others, a great many of the challenges involve physicial strength and endurance: Pulling the rickshaw, taking the cheese down the hill, etc. Should they exclude people who are athletes or weightlifters or professional movers, etc from competing? To me they are the ones with the advantage. :p

I would have pissed all over Phil and the gnome if it meant still having a shot at a million bucks. Seriously, all the foul and degrading shit you just went through for 3 weeks is out the window because you had to tinkle? FAIL.

The cheerleaders are total cnuts, but since I'd love to bang them I'm kind of conflicted about their being in the final 3. Victor and Tammy probably deserve to win the most, and although Margie is to blame for Luke being a sheltered, pouty douchebag, I feel bad for her.

I can't say I'm rooting for anyone, but I would be okay with Victor/Tammy or Margie/Luke. The cheerleaders are just despicable people and I'd hate to see them be despicable and have money. I'd still bang them though.

I have to agree what I believe is the consensus... I would be ok if tammy/ victor or margie/ luke won... With that said I also would like to have an "audition" with the cheerleaders... I am very glad the sisters were gone beasue they were being bitches.

Hey....are you going to post the finale? I know who won, but i purposely haven't watched it b/c I was holding out to read your recap!! Don't leave me hanging....

best recapper evaaar! LOVE