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This season we learned being incredibly bitchy (cheerleaders), insufferably whiny (you know who) and bilingual yet oblivious (Tammy/Victor) gets you to the final three. It's now time to learn which of those traits really pays off - just remember - no matter who wins - we all lose. Why? Because this is AMAZING RACE!
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: She Loses, Everyone Wins!" »
Last week we learned the Chinese need to learn English so that Americans can win a million dollars easier, Cara can beat Michael Phelps any day (provided she doesn't continue to swim like a sea cow) and the leg of the race is never over until Phil says so! Why? Cause it's his mo-fo house and he the daddy of a baby called AMAZING RACE!
We start off with the Cheerleaders getting a face full of "PSYCH!!!" from Phil as they learn the race isn't over. I can't believe Jaime didn't gut Phil right there but they rally and race on. It could be worse - she could slam her head in a car door. Oh but wait...
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: How to Piss Away a Million Dollars" »
Last week we learned that there's no end to Jaime's horrific-ness, Lil Guys came up a lil short in the end and oh yeah - all hell broke loose in the biggest fight on the show ever. Ladies and Gents, it's now time to learn that life can be a bitch - especially if it's racing against you for a million dollars in an... AMAZING RACE!
We begin where we left off in China. Jen and Kisha, first on the last leg, get to take off first to the next stop - Beijing! LOL. Jaime's gonna be fucking THRILLED they're staying in China! I hope like hell her clue reads, "You're next stops are Rome, Paris, Bali--- just kidding, it's CHINA again! SUCKER!"
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: First Place Losers and the Wedgie of Justice!" »
Welcome back everyone! Last week we learned that Mai Thai Trannies sing in the key of "B-Flat" while Jaime sings in the key of "B-itch", the dental program of Thailand thrives on reality show competitions, and the Lil Guys are apparently the biggest rule-breakers the show has ever seen! Now - this week - let's find out who really puts the "itch" in "BITCH!" (and I just signed that too!)... ladies and gentlemen... AMAZING RACE!!!
Margie and Luke are the first to depart Bangkok and head off to Guilin, China! There, they must find a salon to get their next clue. Thank God! Poor Margie could really use a cut and color. And you know Luke's not passing up a chance for mani/pedi's! EEEK!
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: The "Bitch" Heard 'Round the World!!" »
Hiya folks! Good to be back after a week off! Since it was awhile ago, let's recall what we learned on the last episode: elephants may forget about rubbing their taints on teams but we never will, Lil' Guys are rule-breakin' rebels, Jaime is satan incarnate and most importantly, a recipe for drama: 1 Bionic Mom, 1 Melodramatic Boy, -2 Waters; Bake at 350 for 3 hours... and serve up another tasty episode of AMAZING RACE!!!
How do we go on after losing one of my fav teams ever, Mel & Mike?! The same way we always do - with the hope the evil one will continue to make an ass of herself. Take it away Jaime!
On the last episode we learned an old man's wits outweigh his hemorrhoids, Lil' Guys are big on luck, Cheerleaders made us give them an "F!" and give them a "U!" and the Flight Attendants showed us that you can do anything in life if you put your mind to it... except win AMAZING RACE.
Teams start off in Jaipur, India and Tammy and Victor are the first off to the next destination - Phuket, Thailand! Teams must look for a giant gorilla statue...
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: Lil' Guys Get It In the End" »
On the last episode we learned never to trust a gaysian, always wear underwear in Russia and drunken locals + flight attendants = awesome. So get your bottle of vodka and the nearest babushka - it's AMAZING RACE time!!!
Margie and Luke depart first and discover they're all going to India! Jai ho! Once in India they need to find a sacred tree. Wow. Isn't EVERYTHING sacred in India? Good luck finding the right tree. I'm guessing it's the one Ghandi peed on.
But Margie and Luke are NOT happy about India...
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: Domo Arigato Mommie Roboto" »
Hey readers! I'm doing a quickie recap for last weeks so I can get this past Sunday's episode up pronto! Let's get to it!
Last week - we lost quite possibly the dumbest player ever on the race, Amanda, and one of the hottest, Kris (Thanks Amanda - YOU SUCK.) We grieve but we must go on - we have to - because this is the AMAZING RACE!!!
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: Her Russian Name? Anastasia Beaverfrozen!!" »
Last week we learned that Kris and Amanda should never procreate, Tammy needs to buy a Garmin so she can beat Victor in the head with it and being old doesn't mean you can't be a contender on the race - just that you can't win it. Ladies and Gentlemen, it's AMAZING RACE!
Teams start off from Transylvania. After a restful evening of sleeping in coffins and sucking blood out of virgins (this would have been a PERFECT spot for a Tina joke - GOD I MISS HER!), Mel and Mike are the first to leave for Siberia! Their next stop is a Hydroelectric Dam...
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: U Turned Me Off" »
Welcome back kids! On last week's episode we learned that believing that God has something better to do than worry about you - works miracles, hicks can't always find their way out of the woods and that the real contest might be who in this group will become the show's new "Dumbest Contestant EVER" (my bet is on Amanda but the Flight Attendants could pull through). Ladies and Gents - this is AMAZING RACE!
The third leg begins in Austria with Tammy and Victor heading off to Bucharest, Romania. There they will proceed to a Gymnastics Hall. THIS will be a cake-walk for our two favorite Lil' Guys...
Continue reading "Amazing Race: Amazing Race: Keoghan Take Me Away!!" »