It's the finale I've always dreamed of! And by always I mean since like week 5 or something!

"Heartless" is, at this very moment, going down in history as the greatest song choice ever. Well played.

"There were only one million votes separating the top 2 tonight" and the rest of that should read "from the third-place finisher." Don't for one moment believe that only one million votes separated Ham from Krispy. Those producers are pretty slick intending for people to make the assumption that the one million vote differential was between the top two as opposed to actually being the difference between Krispy and Gokey. Think of it like this: Top Two:[Ham/Krispy] -- [1 million votes] -- Church Lady. It must be their way of creating drama, which is good because they sure couldn't create any on stage.

Great stuff there, Flipit. Almost as entertaining as seeing the smug wiped right off ol' CL's face. Not much can top that.

BRILLIANT! Couldn't be happier with the final and your snarkiness is the perfect finale to a really good AI week. Thanks for the giggles!

Hey, I thought Oregon was the pasty-lesbian-with-glued-on-hair state?

Anyway, I'm going to miss Church Lady and that weird snake hand he gets when he sings.

I'm a little worried though. Now that now that CL is gone (sing it with me people: "ding dong the douche is Dead, the dickish old douche is dead"), your recaps might lose their ferocity...oh well, perhaps Hambert will wear his ruby shoes next week.

I actually shrieked with joy when Hokey was voted off, I was so excited.

Would have liked to have seen Allison in his place (as in, in the top 3) but at least her elimination last week meant that we only had to hear the crucifixion of "Dream On" once.

And during Jordin's performance, the first thing that came to my mind was "Hey, wait a second, didn't Pat Benetar have a song about this already?" Ripoff indeed.

I am looking forward to the finale. Great recap Flip!

Flipit--

YOU are my Idol for these ferociously funny re-craps! You spin straw into trash TV gold like Rumpledforeskin.

Fave part of this ep-- the return of The New Mrs Church Lady, JAMAR... OMFG could you believe Gokes almost stole Hambert's Ambiguously Gay Thunder with that tearful reunion?! Danny actually said "And then we just held each other" in response to Tink's queery.

Church and Jamar are so a couple.

Joking about Hambert running wild on a Marine base just isn't worth it. Adam could have had three Marine penises inside him on live TV and it wouldn't be gayer than Gokey.

But I'm happy the finale will now feature plenty of Krispy eye kandy. When he makes that sex-face of his during every performance, to paraphrase the legendary Belinda Carlisle, I get weak.

Krispy Twink-- SIGH. I bet his butthole tastes like cinnamon.

Love,
LLB

Oh, and Gasmii-- Please enjoy my HARPER'S ISLAND recaps on this very site while we await Destiny on the 19th. Muchas gracias!

Flipit, c'mon, your cleaning lady speaks English, she just acts like she doesn't understand you. Como esta? Me no speeky eengleesh. Haha, try short changing her next check and see what happens! "You cheap ass cheeto eatin' lazy mutherfluffer gimme the rest of my pay check!" Hahaha. Anywho love the recap, had me laughing. Soo glad Gokey's gone but Dream On will never be the same, oh well that songs like 90 years old anyway right?

FLIPIT - please recap one icarly episode for me!!! LOL. i'm waiting...

so glad gokey's gone. will be interesting to see where his "career" takes him.

growing tired of the hambert's shouting, so here's to kris!

dax

My cousin works for ABC radio and participated in a phone press conference with Gokey the other day, and she wrote this about it on her facebook page in response to comment by one of her friends about what a great guy Gokey was and that he should have won:
"I dunno about that. He says stuff like this: 'I really want to start a movement with my music, it sounds so big, so cocky, but to start a revolution and change people’s hearts...My whole testimony is overcoming the impossible in my life and now I want to take that message that if I can do it, you can do it.'”

Ugggh. I think he may have really been holding back on the evangelical stuff to try not to alienate viewers, but now that the gag has been removed, prepare yourselves for new heights of messiah complex . . .

LOL, Flip! I'm trying not to giggle madly at your recap at work, but failing miserably. WARNING: Do not drink Dr Pepper and read a Flip recap. Innocent computer screens get sprayed.

Love that Kevin Bacon was in the audience and Blake was sitting near him. Does that make him 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon? Sorry, delirious that CL is gone!

Danny was a douche. His hometown visit made me want to put on "Happy Days" reruns to wipe the bad taste out of my mouth.

Krispy's hometown visit was a lot more interesting: OMG, the Sweet Potatoes Queens showed up. The green-wigged women in the audience. They've written a zillion books on how to be a Southern woman aging gracefully with spice. The Southern ladies' version of the Red Hat Society, only with bigger hair and tiaras. They rock.

Adam's hometown visit. Dang, he sings like a nice guy, a bit mystified with the whole fame thing but totally jazzed on it. Best part: "A woman bared her breasts to me and I got so excited." Sure you did, Adam. :)

Challenge to win a free Diet Coke if I name a guest who actually sings: Make it a Fat Dr Pepper and I will say Randy Travis. You know, the absolutely appalled country music star who is still probably hiding out on his ranch after Adam's rendition of "Ring of Fire," muttering about dark nail polish on boys who sing higher than girls and wear more makeup than his wife (Southern women cake it on y'all.)

Oh such happiness! My roommate thought I was murdering kittens given the screech of delight I let out when Gokey was goned.

They just had to drag the wife up again, didn't they? One last reminder of his loss and pain -- and now he has more loss and pain. Idol gives back!

Skara's response: Oh my God, what happened? Was priceless. Classic. I'm holding it in my memory.

Okay - I'm going to play the daddy (no, not that way) for a minute... I love you, but... I have to say that you (and even more so, many of your commenters) seem to have made Danny the outlet for some deep emotional rage that has nothing to do with his singing. You sound a lot like racists, bullies or Red Sox fans. A mob is a mob.

And I'm disappointed that you didn't point out how they had to carefully place the camera during Adam's visit, so the twenty or so people looked like a crowd. Had nothing to do with his popularity - just that his hometown was jaded San Diego rather than somewhere in the midwest.

Spanx did look great (my great compassion prevents me from commenting on her song, her singing or her showmanship.)

I loved the interaction right before Katy Perry came on stage. Ryan asked Adam and Danny how they were feeling about the results and Danny said "I just want to get it over with" and Adam with excitement said "I want to see Katy Perry!"

Hey Fire@Will, cool it on the Red Sox Fans bashing. We are a proud people.

fire@will: Not getting the racist charge, daddy dear. :) I'm a proud Southern (worse, a Texan) and I don't mind admitting that some members of my state (and the South) have their quirks and charms. I thought Flip's recap was hysterical. Besides, as the lovely Dame Edna once said, "If you can't see the humour in yourself, you could be missing the joke of the century." :)

For the record, yes, there has been blatant favoritism showered on both Danny and Adam this season. No one has tried to cover it up, but that sort of thing is endemic in Reality TV; some people just make for better TV. (And Kris is boring when he not singing, poor cutie, but luckily his singing won out.)

My dislike for Gokey comes from the way they jammed him and his dead wife down our throat at the expense of better singers. I also don't like his voice; not my thing. That has nothing to do with him being Christian (so am I and a lot of America), white (I am half-white, half-Cherokee, who cares), or being from Milwaukee (Texan, y'all, worst state in the Union for jokes). Please don't tar and feather everyone with the same brush. Some people don't like Gokey because they don't like his voice and he comes off as an arrogant toe rag.

I have to confess something: "We hugged. Then we faced each other. Then we climbed on top of each other. Then he won the wrestling match and I got violated. Then we pretended nothing happened and promised to hang out soon." This TOTALLY happened to me. I still see the guy cruising for fresh ass at Starbucks near my house. Oh, and I met him at CHURCH.

Flipit, I admire your strength, I dunno how I would have survived this season without you, much love to you as always...

love, J-Mo :)

Great recap, but I can't believe you didn't mention the whole Danny parting the sea of Fords with big giant Moses arms in the commercial. I almost rolled off the couch laughing and came pretty close to shooting Parrot Bay outta my nose.

All I could hear are happy horns while reading this!!! I'm so in glee for you Flip, and the rest of us too. Poor, dear, CL--this wasn't very special, now was it . . . . tho I personally did not feel the same kind of douche-served fullfilling satisfaction I did when Daughtry got cut early, and his jaw hit the floor. (he WAS getting douchey, right? It wasn't just me, was it!?)

Anyway, for the record, I was and am a fan of CL's voice, I even like his teeth, but in life, when you think you're all that and welfare cheese too, brace yourself for the wrath of 'gasm!!!!

Also, FTR, Krispy is also christian, so I don't think it's a religious thing that CL inspires such disgust in so many, esp. here . . . there's lots o hater's out there . . .

Anyway, good luck with his movement, and once again I ask, what was it about him that gave the show and judges such stiff nipples, do they really think he's more marketable than any of the top 4, and if so, why!? I know there's christian music out there, I love "Flood" by Jars of Clay, but is that going to out sell Carrie, or Kelly, or even Cook!?

Anyhoo, I think there's 88 mil votes coz America is f 'in sick of the pimping for no good reason. At least Glam mostly earned the praise, and when CL was good, he was good, but when he was bad, (can we say scatting on a rock song) there was no accounting for it. I even read they had to change the edit of the recap at the last second coz he didn't do that in rehearsal . . . must have been inspired, yo!

I'm so proud of Krispy, and his daddy is so, so, so very sweet--I'd give him a big kiss! Honestly, he was fodder w no screen time when this thing started up, and yes, people find him cute, and that helps, but I really feel he earned it!!! Mad props, and now he might just take this whole thing! Eat that Simon!

So, my hopes for next week . . . . Glam doesn't screech, and covers "Take On Me" Simon gives Tink the deep tongue kiss he's been waiting for, Skara wrote a song that Krispy can conceivably sing and it doesn't suck.

Their shock at the elimination was so wrong and so biased, ass shats!!! They're lucky I was there with a pea shooter!!!

I mean wasn't there . . . .

i am going to miss reading these comments when this season is over. he DID part the cars like the red sea of fords. that description killed me! i didn't see that. i just tried to make his arms into a nazi sign but couldn't so just cut the pic. lol.

sorry for getting so bilious about gokester, but i think you should blame him for turning me into that monster. i don't want to be that way and read lots of self help books and stuff, but certain egos just do it to me. blame the victim, that's what i say. that story about him traveling around with his "message" in his music? BWAHAHAHAH. he is going to change the world with really slow versions of "you are so beautiful" and add some scats. whatevs. thanks for reading you guys!

I think we all saw a piece of Danny's "movement" when he crouched down and dropped it on stage during his massacre of Dream On.

Ahh-some.

Just ahh-some.

Again with all the Gokey vitriol. Other than Allison, who did he stick around longer than (arguably) "better singers?" W/E, he's gone, and now maybe we can just not talk about him ad nausea. Fat chance. I know.

Why did Katy Perry have Adam's name embroidered on her cheap Elvis cape? She sucks in every way. I wish she was a contestant on AI so I could throw barbs at her every week and learn the mysterious ways of Internet Commenter Hate. I could totally get into snarking about that skank.

Great recap as always. Is Skara-mouche gonna be back next year?

fire@will:

I agree with jennaboa on the reasons I hate Gokey. I find him to be arrogant, boring and not that great.

I'll thank you not to compare me to a racist.

And also, Adam did have quite a bit gathering of people - I know two who were there and they said that there were loads of people.

Memememe: Personally, I thought Danny's best friend was a better singer (less interesting story and face worked against him.) And Matt and possibly even Allison.

Katy Perry is a fashion train wreck. Her clothes were more interesting than her performance in the fact they were tragically fug. Like Flip, I found that even that couldn't detract from the craptacularness of her singing. I would have loved to hear Simon critique her: "This is a *singing* competition, not a circus midway freak show."

But, then again, elephants might have helped. Just a bit. :)

Memememe - I would agree with jennaboa that Matt and Allison were better singers than Danny - and if we go back to the entire top 12, Alexis was SO much better. I think Anoop also had a better voice - just no talent for picking songs that didn't put us to sleep.

mememememe, I love Skara-mouche!!!

the nickname, ie, there's an article coming in the sun times (yea, I'm psychic like that) where she says she could go anytime--Simon says she's staying. I'd rather see her be behind the scenes and help the kiddies pick better songs, even "classics"--wouldn't it make for a better show to give them some help in that way.

Always remember, sometimes hate is the closest thing to love . . .

I was happy Katy sang live, no matter how awful it was--I'm still hella pissed that Brit is doing a whole tour and not singing one live note, not even with a track . . . tho Katy could have used a few canned vox in that mix. She seems fun to me . . .

In case there's any doubt about the douchiness of Thank Heaven He's GOneKEY, check out his interview on eonline.com under Watch W/ Kristin....shades of BB's Amber anyone??

xqzmoi: "There were only one million votes separating the top 2 tonight" and the rest of that should read "from the third-place finisher." Don't for one moment believe that only one million votes separated Ham from Krispy.

Not only do I think they were telling the truth, but I think Twink actually could win. Think about all the CL voters that will be converting to Krispy.

I think both of them want to win, but both should be hoping they dont. Ham winning may give him less freedom in his music...idk, i can't think of the words i want to say...anyone know what i mean?

Kris, on the other hand, should be praying he loses because, otherwise, he'd get a heck of a lot of backlash that would translate to less record sales...He'd probably be forever known as the one that stopped Adam from winning.

I'm an antitheist, antidouchist, antideadwifewhoringist, antipimpedrealitycontestantist, and antiscreamandspitinsteadofsingingist, but I'm really not sure where the racism comes in?

Is it because Gokey tries to sing and dance like sixty-year-old black woman from a Mississippi snakehandler tent revival?

Because that doesn't make him black, you know.

Good one, Itchy

I was also wondering how racism comes into in when all 3 finalists are white guys

Amen. Amen. Amen. All my votes for Krispy and Adam paid off. I'm so happy. Now I don't care who wins.

"Glam doesn't screech, and covers 'Take On Me'"

You said it, Juddfan. There is a cover version of "Take On Me" out now, by an alternative band, that is awesome. I doubt Ham will do it because that high note is scary. It could make or break him.

Does poor little Kris HAVE to sing a Skara song? That's a handicap right there. He could sing the hell out of an alternative or emo song, IMO. All the young girls and guys would love it.

As for Gokey vitriol, I think there is plenty to dislike about this guy, so why not just leave the religion and the dead wife out of it? (I know, I know, he doesn't.) And talking about "hating" anybody, let alone someone as innocuous as Gokey, is a bit hyperbolic IMO. The closest person I come to hating is Dick Cheney, but I don't think I'd ever say that about him. Even Dick doesn't kill puppies or rape children or whatever.

>> Even Dick doesn't kill puppies or rape children or whatever. >>

Dropping bombs on them, on the other hand...

"Don't eat banana and peanut butter sandwiches on the pot." - Spit-take! That was freakin' hilarious!

pixielated, glad you're on board with the choice, and i think he could nail the high note and the next 10 above it, so it could be crazyness!

As for Mr. Cheney, are you sure? Oh yeah, he only shoots faces off while hunting . . . I'm sure none of us would get in trouble for doing that!!!

Anyway, I don't hate Gokey, and I used to had Tommy Girl Cruise, but I guess I'm just mellowing with age . . . enjoy the finale all!!!

My mom made the funniest comment on Katy Perry's outfit: "She's dressed like Evil-Lynn from He-Man!" LOL!

Yay!!!! No more Church Lady!!!
Go Adam! He can totally be the next Spanx!