Castro was never featured in the Dallas auditions, and I only saw brief snippets of him with his guitar during that episode. So he's come rather far for someone who was never highlighted as a contender. I say leave now and become a better musician. Or go back to reality TV. I had no idea that he was on that MTV show Cheyenne as that main girl's love interest, did you? That's one step away from going on The Hills and hanging out at the coffeehouse with Spencer. It's all on the same station.
Your days are numbered, Justin Bobby.
Finally, Fetus. Precious Fetus. He insists that he hasn't sung a romantic love song yet, so he's selected Elvis Presley's "Love Me Tender." Ugh. Really? I'd rather have him bopping to "What is Love" Night at the Roxybury-style. Instead, he has to go and melt the hearts of everyone who still believes in angels and intelligent design. Oh, and those in favor of abstinence-only education.
I don't get it. Why is Fetus treated like a miracle? The arrangement of the song, spare and sweet in its piano accompaniment is what makes it, not the vocal acrobatics Fetus is doing with the melody. The chords are great. He might as well sing "When I Fall in Love."
At least Elvis Dog keeps his eyes open when he's singing. - Andrew Lloyd Webber
He falters on the high "always" at the end. Randy, however, jubilantly pushes for his poster boy and says Fetus caressed every word tenderly. Hott vocals of the night. I feel gross typing that extra "t." Paula gushes that it was one of her faves, that she felt his heart (what about the joy?! the joy, Paula, the joy!). Simon shows no restraint in saying that Fetus crushed the competition. Fetus's knees buckle from the surprise and he starts hyperventilating as Seabreath goes to catch him.
Leaning Tower of Cheese-a.
Seabreath reminds us this is the week they lost Tamyra and Daughty in past seasons. For good reason, Seabreath. In summary: Fetus makes me feel diabetic. Like someone laced my water with Nutrasweet, Splenda, MSG and all sorts of saccharine things that cause cancer. And I can't afford insulin so I am feeling light-headed and want to pass out after hearing him. He's totally safe. David Cook? Also totally safe. Syesha? She pulled out the stops, and deserves to stay. I feel compelled to root for her since the Fetus-Cook showdown has seemed inevitable for weeks now. Also, boobies = ratings and there's no way the Top 3 would be a sausage fest without diversity. Nigel Lythgoe is too smart for that.
Bon Voyage, Castro!
Castro, you went to Bonetown tonight. And not the good Bonetown, either. Mr. Tambourine Man says what you did to his song was unforgivable. Something that more cowbell can't fix. America can't be that retarded to not send you home. I would start peddling for some cash at Hollywood and Highland right about now if I were you. Just watch out for Spiderman.
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Comments (8)
Hahaha. OMG Castro sucked it up this week, but your recap was awesome. Way to go T.Vo!
1 of 8 | Posted by bone | Posted on May 7, 2008 10:05 PM
It's actually 101st, not 101th. Sorry, I'm a word nerd. Like Cookie. I just discovered that he and I are soulmates, so I'm full of love tonight.
Castro annoys me - so much. Carly and Brooke (who I actually liked) were way stronger vocally than he is and he did not deserve his spot in the top 4, at all.
I want Cook to win, mainly because his brother is dying of cancer and it would be a nice thing for his family. But on the other hand, I don't want him to win because it means that he'll be stuck doing Idol-related stuff for quite awhile and he won't be able to do his own thing. Like how Daughtry said he was actually glad he didn't win for that reason.
I'm over David A. I like him, but meh. I got a super gay vibe from his Star Search days video - anyone else get that? Too bad for the fangirls.
LOVE David Cook! And great recap!
2 of 8 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on May 8, 2008 1:31 AM
Great recap-ness!
Jason deserves to go (from the show and from my memory) for so many reasons - not the least being his contempt for the show and it's producers.
I like that Syesha has pulled up near the leaders.
I hope Fetus wins. He is the only one who MIGHT be better off (career wise) winning rather than being a runner-up.
3 of 8 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on May 8, 2008 7:58 AM
Something that more cowbell can't fix.
How funny can you be. I was laughing throughout the entire recap, and then you had to end it with that last remark. Too FUNNY!
4 of 8 | Posted by crazycatally | Posted on May 8, 2008 1:13 PM
"Paula likes extended metaphors and says the song left her with a big appetite to see him grow and flourish."
Paula the cougar.
5 of 8 | Posted by dredge | Posted on May 8, 2008 1:17 PM
I think the guy would win the arch-fest fer sure!!!! Spot on recap!!! Can't wait to see who wins this puppy, but hmmm could it be a David--If it's DC I'm a gonna win the office pool!!!
6 of 8 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on May 8, 2008 2:31 PM
Loved the recap T.Vo - you had me giggling hysterically to myself at "My face thinks it's Brooke White"!
hilarious!!
7 of 8 | Posted by molo | Posted on May 8, 2008 5:20 PM
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me someone else has this episode still saved on their DVR or whatever!!! Watch the original end of Archuletta's performance where his voice cracks, and then watch the reviews, where they replay the singing at the end....TWO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ENDINGS!! In the review, his voice doesnt crack at all. Its a different performance...
Any insight on how that happens on a "live" show???
8 of 8 | Posted by Crowni84 | Posted on May 19, 2008 11:34 AM