All right, dolls. This is it. First I'd like to thank Flippy and T.Vo for sharing writing duties on this one, cause I am obsessed with American Idol, and have been since the day this show first aired.
For Sale
Let me take you back to 2002 - Season One. I was working for a very, very confused company in New York who I somehow managed to dupe into paying me to basically do nothing. They kept telling me to "hold on, we're just getting organized, and then we'll let you know what we need from you." This went on for about a year before I finally got bored and moved to LA. And not only were they paying me to sit around and do nothing, they even hired me an assistant to help me do it! He was just as happy to be paid to sit around as I was, and we spent our days doing crossword puzzles and taking long lunches at Rye Playland, where we would eat sandwiches, and then play baci for an hour. It was lovely.
One day, one of the brilliant executives noticed that we were taking daily three hour lunches, and informed us that it had to stop. Not for the sake of working, mind you, they were still deep into their "getting organized" phase, but nonetheless, the days of picnic lunches and baci were done. Crosswords weren't enough to keep us busy. And then, we were saved by American Idol.
From the moment the first show aired, we were both hooked. We would spend the whole day talking about the contestants and the show. He was a Nikki McKibbin fan, and I was (don't judge!) for Justin Guarini. We both agreed that while Kelly Clarkson had a fabulous voice, she was missing that "X Factor". For the record, I have uttered the word "X Factor" approximately 9,128,756 times since my Idol journey began. It's one of my most important criteria. Obviously, I was wrong about Kelly, as evidenced by the fact that Since U Been Gone has now reached VIP status on my ipod. It's my go-to song for everything.
I never said I was psychic.
In the beginning, I prided myself on backing the top performers. My picks didn't always win, but they always made top two. First, there was Justin. I was for Ruben Studdard from the start. Then I was a Bo Bice girl. Another one of my jobs is as an airline stewardess, and shortly after the end of Season Three, I was working the 8 am flight from LA to New York when I overheard one of the gate agents say that Bo was currently boarded on the 9 am flight. I literally flung my tray of pre-departure mimosas at a passenger and took off down the concourse.
The 8 am flight took a delay that day, but I make no apologies, cause I met Bo, and let me tell you, that guy has a great ass. It was during Season Four that my picks started to go wrong. While I was understanding when George Huff had to go, I was devastated when LaToya London was voted off. I still think she was robbed. I have met Fantasia, and while she is an absolute sweetheart and a great talent, she really wasn't for me. And I was very annoyed with her work ethic when she starred in The Color Purple. Sixty missed performances is unacceptable. Especially when you're working for Oprah.
Oh no she didn't!
My losing streak continued into Season Four. First, I strongly backed Mandisa. From the moment she opened her mouth, I declared the season a complete waste of time, as I was convinced we already had the clear winner. When she was scandalously voted off, I fell into a deep depression, and could not even speak of Idol for days. But I bouced back with Chris Daughtry, who I still love.
But when Chris was gone, I had no one. While she was a very pretty girl, I just did not have the McPheever. And when it came to Taylor Hicks, my friend Fabulonista said it best. When I tried to explain his appeal with the old standard: "Well, he's got that whole 'be yourself' thing going", she replied "I don't know where this 'be yourself' thing came from, but I don't like it." Thank you very much, Fab. The concepts of "being yourself" and "X Factor" are indeed diametrically opposed.
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Comments (13)
I was extremely dissappointed Drew (the farmer) and Kyle didn't make it...especially given potential serial killer Colton David Berry (he uses three names...a sure tip-off he's homicidal,) and future Cher impersonator Danny Noriega both made the cut. (Can't you just picture Danny singing "If I Could Turn Back Time"?) Not to mention David Cook...who just irritates me. I look at him and think," talentless hack."
Josiah is an obvious nutball who needs medication. That kid's emotions are all over the map.
And I think Michael Johns is from Australia.
Great recap!
1 of 13 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on February 15, 2008 3:45 PM
I think my current fave pick is Michael Johns, or whoever it was that sang Bohemian Rhapsody. I'm severely tone deaf, so I choose based on looks rather than performance. And no, I don't actually vote, because I know my criteria are a little screwy.
2 of 13 | Posted by abaumga2 | Posted on February 15, 2008 3:46 PM
I'm glad that Kyle guy didn't make it thru. People may have liked him but do I have to remind everyone of Sanjaya??? We don't need another one this season and I'm surprised that Simon was so upset.
I agree that Michael Johns is hot and while I'm not a huge Queen fan, I liked his audition alot.
3 of 13 | Posted by murphena | Posted on February 15, 2008 4:07 PM
Ugh, after Hollywood Week I was so over Josiah. I kind of liked him in the beginning, but oy. I'm all for a man who can cry, but seriously dude, grow a pair.
I'm actually really loving the top 24 this season - I was really hoping that nerdy Kyle would make it in, but oh well.
And Carly Smithson is Irish and Michael Johns is Australian, in case you were wondering. Love them both. But David Archiletta is my fave so far - let's see how it goes, knock on wood.
4 of 13 | Posted by georgiababe | Posted on February 15, 2008 10:42 PM
I always love a recapper who loves the show -- provides for a good balance of affection and snarkiness. I took an American Idol break for a few seasons, but I'm back this year (as of this week), and looking forward to reading your recaps!
5 of 13 | Posted by rjfrankel | Posted on February 15, 2008 11:01 PM
Great recap and agreed 100% with all your picks to win throughout the seasons.
Thank God Kyle didn't make it not that the scary Colton should've made it, but come on now, we all know it would've been a big waste of time if he had made it. If Kyle should've taken anyone's spot, it should've been Danny Noriega, I guess being outwardly gay is something American needs to see but it's only alright unless your not annoying and Danny is annoying as hell.
While I'm not on the Carly "Overrated" Smithson train, I'm fully aboard on the Michael "Chosen One" train and an honorable mention goes out to Asia, my top girl this season.
6 of 13 | Posted by bigjr6633 | Posted on February 16, 2008 5:23 AM
Great recap! I thought I was the only one who saw through Josiah's BS. I can't believe what a diva he was for a guy that's living out of his car. I'm glad I don't have to put up with him all season. It's going to be enough to have to deal with Carly 'resuscitate my career' Smithson. I hope she goes before the top 12. If a recording deal and $2M in promotion couldn't make her a singing star, then nothing will. I'm not understanding the David Archuletta hype but then I don't get the Hannah Montanna popularity either. I can't wait to see how this season shapes up.
7 of 13 | Posted by greeneyes | Posted on February 16, 2008 7:19 PM
great recap!!!
all in all i am looking forward to this season more than the last-i don't get all the love that was thrown at that Josiah dude-what a drama queen and his fake british accent was so uuuggghh! Loved that michael john dude and asia! BTW-ChickBomb-you rock! keep it up!
8 of 13 | Posted by yuds101 | Posted on February 16, 2008 7:34 PM
Overall, I really enjoyed this recap. One little pet peeve though -- get the names right!:) It's David Archuleta, and the last girl cut was Cardin, not Carmen.
Also, Michael Johns is definitely from Australia, not England.
Again, I really enjoyed this, but you gotta get the facts straight:)
9 of 13 | Posted by jayfersgirl | Posted on February 17, 2008 9:15 AM
Goth Amanda's head is like waayy too big for her body. Or maybe she just has too much hair. I don't know, she looks like a bobblehead. Her head is enormous and then you see her body and it just doesn't fit.
I am glad Josiah's little puss n boots act from shrek won't be gracing our TV screens anymore. so tired of hearing him whine, and you are right, his name is annoying.
I just thought it was ridiculous taht he's telling us he has nothing, he lives in his car, waaaaah, when it was his choice to leave home. With no career or money. Only a car. And a guitar. And a shitload of tears.
10 of 13 | Posted by DP Hooker | Posted on February 17, 2008 8:04 PM
Greeneyes--I totally agree with you on not getting the David Archuletta hype. I get that he's adorable, but like you, I also don't get the Hannah Montana hype, so I can't really get on that train.
In other news, I want to marry Michael Johns. He is my top pick at the moment. Sadly, I haven't been able to watch the Tuesday episodes of Idols this season, but I tend to do well with my picks, the last 2 seasons aside. That's only because I didn't care for Taylor or Katherine and anyone last season.
11 of 13 | Posted by lalia | Posted on February 17, 2008 8:41 PM
God I hate this show. They spend all this time on this Josiah dude who's on an emotional rollercoaster and exploit his obvious mix of ego and inexperience. Then they cut him. We still haven't seen 4-5 of the people that actually made it in the top 24. The joke might be on AI after all. There's a LOT of support for this guy all over the place, he's going to be on the Ellen DeGeneres show which is a huge deal. Maybe that'll show AI to stop bringing in these obvious plants they're trying to pimp and stick with real amateurs.
12 of 13 | Posted by VICI | Posted on February 18, 2008 1:41 AM
Seacrest was so funny when he was patronizing Josiah right after he got booted. Loved it! That is why he is the best in the business.
It seems like Asia'h (ridiculous spelling) is getting a lot of love, but I honestly can't stand her! I felt bad for her about her father, but I really just did not like her voice at all. It's squeaky or raspy or something not pleasant at all. Kady Malloy hasn't gotten much airtime so far but she was awesome in her audition and I hope she goes far.
13 of 13 | Posted by BRaps | Posted on February 19, 2008 8:36 AM