TVgasm Recaps: Your Source for American Idol

American Idol: Scream It Like You Mean It

Hi Gasmi, Waffleboy here filling in for Flipit who is taking a much deserved vacation south of the border, that hopefully is featuring plenty of beach time, good food, fun, and maybe a telenovela recap or two. Anyway, you're stuck with me for this recap, and if you keep making that face, it's going to stay that way.

Seeing as It's Rolling Stones night, that a pretty cool segue into last night's episode, huh? Also it's fun to notice just how much Mick Jaeger is looking like Ruth Gordon as he gets older.

I'm telling you, the resemblance is eerie

Anyway, enough segueing, let's make the jump and find out just what the hell happened on American Idol last night.

Posted by WaffleBoy at 8:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (9)

American Idol Results: There's a Reason We Have an Age Minimum to Vote

The news on American Idol was pretty shocking this week. Shocking because I can't believe any of us actually cared! BUT WE DID DAMMIT! There's lots of angry tears and a distraught homeless woman waiting for us, so let's jump in!

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Does anyone have a map? Cuz my ass is lost.

Posted by Flipit at 4:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (14)

American Idol: Mediocrity is the Goal. With a Little More Effort Y'all Might Get There! GUITAR

Tonight, American Idol proves....well nothing. It proves nothing. But the women were better. There. You feeling sad yet? Wanna feel sadder? Keep reading.

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The only difference between you and me is MY TEARS ARE REAL! And you're thinner. And prettier. And more barren. And richer. But we're just as balding! Why do I feel the need to know you? WHY?!

Posted by Flipit at 3:07 AM | Permalink | Comments (34)

American Idol: I Don't Know What Kind of Aaaaartist You Aaaare!

Tonight, the girls who suck consistently are awesome and the awesome girls suck. Way to change it up, Idol!

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Well, at least someone's consistent.

Posted by Flipit at 12:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (20)

American Idol Results: From Church Lady to Cokehead in Less Than a Year.

Wow. Tonight's American Idol results is full of greatness. If this is what a subpar season looks like then I'm ALL IN.

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I don't really have anything to say about this, but yay for kinda pretty people!

Posted by Flipit at 1:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (20)

American Idol: When In Doubt, Sing Veeeery Slooooowly

Tonight on American Idol, Skara says things that I knida agree with two times, most of the girls blow chunks, and OrganiJoplin lives!!

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It's nights like this you wonder how this girl didn't get on the show.

Posted by Flipit at 2:08 AM | Permalink | Comments (20)

American Idol: The God Card

Tonight on American Idol, there is a lot of sitting on stools. The favorites fall hard, and the weaker contestants rise to the top. And lots of guys do pushups.

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Yes, Skara. WE CAN HEAR YOU.

Posted by Flipit at 3:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (14)

American Idol: Cholaheta is Half Blind...and Results

Tonight, America makes some harebrained decisions and Kris comes back to remind us that he wasn't second place on American Idol. This....is American Idol Results!!!!!

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Not lookin' good for Aloha.

Posted by Flipit at 2:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (16)

American Idol: ....But Fat Guys Can. Yay Double Standards!

The producers are dead set on a girl winning this season of American Idol, so each one of them has to be physically fit and at least semi cute. The guys are set up to lose, so they can be as fug as they need to be. Thankfully for us, this means we'll at least get to hear some decent singing this year. At this point I don't care if you look like a monkey. Just don't suck.

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You're gonna be fantastic. On the radio.