To keep with the times, Blake's modernized his argyle sweater and put a white streak in his hair, but his beats are the same as always. He can't stay on pitch through one entire phrase, but his dancing is the most entertaining thing I've seen all night. It's exciting to see someone so unafraid to suck it. Next to Elaine's idiot dance on Seinfeld, this is my favorite TV choreography ever.
Randy liked this one better than his last, and he dug the reggae spin, but he still wasn't jumping up and down. He tells Blake that he doesn't have to beat box on every song. Paula growls "but if you can..." And if you can't? She calls Blake the "contemporary rebel of this competition". Umkay. She officially loses all credibility with me (for tonight) when she tells him he sang every note "spot on key". Pull your labia out of your ears, woman. Simon says that was a horrible choice of song and was "utterly tuneless". He knows Blake has a lot of "young support", but he had a bad night. Randy agrees, and Paula says "jive talkin'" about seven or eight times. Tink asks Blake if he thought Simon would get it and Blake says "I didn't think so." It wasn't hard to grasp, ass. Just to listen to.
Tink goes over to say hi to Nancy Reagan in the audience. Wait a second, that's a drunk ass Judge Judy! My bad. She gets up and tries to kiss the Judges like they're at a cocktail party and have all the time in the world. Tink jokes that she and Simon were separated at birth, and she waves like she's on a parade float. I wish the fairy put the time to good use and asked her to judge Blake's performance.
LaKisha has chosen "Run to Me" as her second song, and you'll never believe this but Gibblet found it surprising. He tries to talk her into using her high register again, and this time she listens. Wow. She does have an upper range. Who knew?
She does a beautiful job and makes me feel it. I am loving this woman tonight. And then she bones the last note and does that pull the microphone away from the face thing so maybe we'd just think we couldn't hear the part where she came back on track. Ok, so the upper register is iffy, but I vote for her fifty times anyways because she had the balls to sport the biggest panty line in AI history. Now that's a contemporary rebel.
Randy said it was much better than the first number, even with the hoarse ending. Paula tells her not to beat herself up over it at all, she's still a champ. Simon keeps it short. It was better than the first one but she and Blake are both vulnerable tonight. Aw. One crap note and no love? Boooooo.
Jordin's closing out the show with "Woman in Love" which was sung by Barbra Streisand. The girl's got a pair, I'll give her that. Gibblet is impressed with her control and thinks she's going to turn in the best performance of the night. She starts off strong, but there's only so much yelling one girl can do in a night. Her voice is wobbly and off key by the middle, and by the end she is screeching like she just found out Barbra originally dedicated this song to Elliot Gould.
Randy calls her pitchiness out and Paula calls her beautiful. Harsh. Simon says it was very old fashioned and pageant-y. What the hell kind of pageants does this guy watch?
I light a smoke and cry for Boogie. You may not be able to kill it, but you can sure beat(box) the hell out of it and make it wish it were dead. I know my sadness has nothing to do with wiggy and a lot to do with the storm of injustice brewing for Wednesday night. I dial and I pray, but I have a feeling LaKisha's out. What do you think?
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Comments (15)
Hey Flipit, I agree Lakisha is probably done. If it were based on last night alone Blake should be gone, but I think his fan base is a lot deeper than Kiki's.
Great recap!
-JR
1 of 15 | Posted by JasonR
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Posted on May 9, 2007 9:18 AM
Love you, love you, love you, Flipit. Reading your recaps makes temping a heluva lot more fun.
Unlike you, I am a Blake fan. However, You Should Be Dancing is NOT a good choice at this point in the the competition (though I did like This is Where I Come In). I think Night Fever or How Deep Is Your Love (which he did in the group round in Hollywood) would have been a better choice for his first song.
Like you, I have a feeling LaKisha's out. Blake has enough of a fan base (yes, including me) to keep him on for at least another week, though he's going to REALLY have to bring it next week to make it to the finals. However, I can see LaKisha and Melinda starting to cancel each other out, if that makes any sense.
Jordin is good with the right song, I'll admit. Her first song was really good. Her sugariness irritates me, though (I had some similar issues with Carrie Underwood at times, though she definitely deserved to win). And I am getting SO SICK of the "she's only 17!" garbage. Every season, there's at least one really young finalist (though, granted, they usually don't get as far as Jordin has). Also, wasn't Diana DeGarmo 16? Did they keep saying that? (I didn't watch that season.)
I still maintain that Jordin is heavily favored by the producers to win, and that's totally not her fault, but it still rubs me the wrong way.
2 of 15 | Posted by maybeimamazed02
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Posted on May 9, 2007 9:20 AM
Blake's performance last week won me over, but I groaned when he beatboxed again this week. Yes, its neat that he can do it, but AI is a singing competition and beatboxing should be an infrequent occurance. I think tonights results will be relatively predictable, with Kiki going home and Blake in the bottom two.
3 of 15 | Posted by abaumga2
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Posted on May 9, 2007 9:23 AM
ROTFLMBBAO!!! *Dead*. One of the best recap. Great screen shots. And I think Kiki is gonna bite it tonight, even though I think it should be BeatBoxBoy.
4 of 15 | Posted by UptownGirl
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Posted on May 9, 2007 10:34 AM
So long as Melinda doens't go tonight.. I really don'e care who does out of the remaining 3... Blake... meh... he's so played out and his beatboxing sucks.
Lakisha.. she can sing yes, but I never saw the appeal of her.
Jordin, she's great when she picks the right songs, but when it's the wrong song, BOY does she suck balls.
5 of 15 | Posted by Shollia
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Posted on May 9, 2007 11:21 AM
OK, is it only me who thought Barry's grayer and rounder head holds what is probably the worst pair of slurr-inducing dentures since Geoge Washington carved himself a set? And is it only me who thinks Melinda, with her crazy hand shaking and staggered stage lurching, is gonna get bounced right after that walking set of boobs, aka Lakisha, is finally tossed out on her dead-eyed, personality-free butt? Just asking.
6 of 15 | Posted by BobbyP
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Posted on May 9, 2007 11:29 AM
Holy shit, does Blake ever suck. He sucks harder than anything has ever sucked before. He can't sing, he beatboxes as well as your average 8th grader (if I ever see Paula or Randy in person, I will personally beat the snot out of each of them for calling his hackneyed shit "unique.") Plus, he's ugly. This person has got be related to Big Brother's Mike Booger in some way, right down to his wiggy wiggy white boy fucktardedness (it's a word).
I find him to be the perfect microcosm for this entire season. Marginally talented, thoroughly unattractive, and unduly adored. Thanks, AI. Fuckers.
7 of 15 | Posted by Die_MediaWhores
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Posted on May 9, 2007 11:33 AM
I think that Blake is in trouble. As much as I like him (esp. his rendition of "Time of the Season") I agree with Paula (WTF?!), he should have sang "Jive Talkin'".
I'm disappointed in most of the song choices - it's not like they didn't have thousands of songs to choose from! One/any of the girls should have done "Emotion" and another "Guilty" and hell, even "Too Much Heavan". .....and no, I am NOT ashamed of my BeeGees knowledge. Thank god no one busted out "Islands in the Stream"!
PS. Barry is scary with grey hair!
8 of 15 | Posted by jennae
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Posted on May 9, 2007 11:54 AM
It was so cool that they got Will Farrel to do his Sean Connery impression last nite. What?! That was Barry Gibb?
9 of 15 | Posted by cvreeken
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Posted on May 9, 2007 12:11 PM
Ugh, I hate hate hate Blake. I thought this was a SINGING competition, not a piss me off competition. He can't sing. Does no one else realize this? HE CANNOT SING! I'd be less pissed if Sangina was still there instead of him, I'm super cereal, guys. Die_Mediawhores gets the award for truthiness of the year comment.
Flipit, one of your best recaps ever. I lol'ed at your "Thanks for drinking" screen cap.
Screw winning a trip to the Idol finale, I want to win a trip to watch the finale with Flipit!
10 of 15 | Posted by brendahamLincoln
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Posted on May 9, 2007 12:35 PM
Thanks for pointing out KiKi's panty line -- we were shocked. I am a large woman, and believe me, if you wear a dress like that, you definitely freeball it. Without question. (Or thong it, but I just didn't want to send everyone racing to scrub their eyeballs at the thought...)
11 of 15 | Posted by killbondnow
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Posted on May 9, 2007 2:41 PM
^^^amen. self love is important. so are pantie lines.
"Barry's grayer and rounder head holds what is probably the worst pair of slurr-inducing dentures since Geoge Washington carved himself a set? "
"This person has got be related to Big Brother's Mike Booger in some way, right down to his wiggy wiggy white boy fucktardedness (it's a word)."
"It was so cool that they got Will Farrel to do his Sean Connery impression last nite. "
george washington carving himself a pair is still killing me. thanks guys.
12 of 15 | Posted by Flipit
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Posted on May 9, 2007 2:52 PM
Hey flipit, nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah!! My boy is still in and you get to watch him again next week! The beatbox gods have smiled upon him this week...
13 of 15 | Posted by Pegster
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Posted on May 9, 2007 9:48 PM
i'll get you my pretty
14 of 15 | Posted by Flipit
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Posted on May 10, 2007 12:53 PM
great recap, as per usual. funny captions! even funnier comments (fucktardedness is my new fave)
First of all -- those songs completely SUCK UNWIPED ARSE. No wonder the judges weren't impressed. Shithouse material!
Barry Gibb is a crappy liar bc it's so clear he couldn't stand hearing anyone (female) trying to do his stuff. Plus he HATED the beatboxing! (as did I -- give it a rest, mate!)
Kiki was great, but woefully underappreciated. I don't understand why the judges (and voters) weren't wowed by her perfs week after week, tho she did get a little hoarse towards the end both times this week... And she really didn't bring it on those high notes, which was a shame. She rocked that Shirley Bassey/Bond track a few weeks ago, tho. I don't care what anyone says.
Blake will go next.
Jordin's got the prize, fer sure. As I commented elsewhere, once her voice matures and she gains the benefit of proper coaching, her voice will be truly stupendous!
but never as good as Kiki's...
15 of 15 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates!
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Posted on May 10, 2007 8:24 PM