I actually have no idea where Idol is tonight, so I guess we'll all be surprised. Clay Aiken, Jennifer Hudson and Fantasia have been discovered here, Seacrest tells us. That means nothing to me, but then he tells me that they're in Atlanta. You know who else is from Atlanta? None other than Ryan. And his parents show up! They look normal, which is actually incredibly disappointing.

Anyone else hoping for a loud mouthed abusive harpie?

First up is some dude who has a soul patch. Good to hear people haven't decided to stray from the ways of the soul patch in 2008. He actually works for a glass company, and in the background FOX chooses "Broken Glass" by Annie Lennox. Don't ask how or why I know that. He's passionate about glass, but not so passionate that he wouldn't jump at the opportunity to go to Hollywood. He would probably take some glass with him so he wouldn't feel too far from his roots. Joke's on him though. There's glass everywhere!

Now to the actual audition. Simon asks why he's there, and this always confuses me. Camera time? Duh Cowell. Save your insolent questions. Dude's gonna sing some Queen, which is pretty ambitious. And straight out of Shaun of the Dead, he sings Don't Stop Me Now. Unfortunately, Simon doesn't even let him get through the audition before interrupting him about his crazy eyes. He tries again with dead eyes, but only gets about 3 words in before the crazy eyes kick back in. They tell him to turn around, and then he turns back around as he starts, missing the point behind not wanting to see his crazy eyes. By now I'm so distracted I could care less about whether he gets through or not.

Surprise!

When he's done, Simon says he wishes they'd done that to Clay Aiken years ago. Paula's a yes, Simon's a no, and Randy hesitates. Cut to outside the room, he walks out with a pass to Hollywood! He won't last long.

More montages, then a dude who auditioned in season 4 two people in front of Carrie Underwood. Man, just think about how close he was to getting through! I assume that's what he wants us to do. He's pretty boring. Oh, he wishes he still knew her. Because he totally had the chance to hit it. People tell him he's got star quality, and he has really nice friends because he's boring. Come on; get more of a personality please.

But keep everything else just the same.

So he gets in to audition, and he tells Simon he doesn't know what he was thinking when he auditioned 3 years ago. He's going to sing a song by Rascal Flatts (I loathe country and am not sure how to spell that, and I refuse to look it up), and I immediately like him less. Hmm, the audition isn't very good, but the song is just terrible. He really should have sang something not shitty. Oh man, after the audition, he says he's a music major, majoring in singing. Simon is blunt, saying his pen has more charisma than this guy. This guy isn't getting through, but Paula won't say yes or no because it doesn't matter what she says. I smell a montage...

Ryan tells us that this season Paula isn't really saying yes or no. And we get clips of it! Clips! From the clips, Simon obviously harasses her trying to get a straight answer, but her love of people or prescription drugs prevents her from developing opinions.

Next we have a small-town country girl who I'm guessing is going to get through. Because she's normal looking and we're focusing on her, so why not? Two days ago she called her dad to tell him she was on her way to Atlanta to audition, and her brother called her 30 minutes later and her dad had been in a car accident and passed away. Yeesh.

Any diseases you'd like to tell us about?

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Posted in American Idol by Treadingonme at 4:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (7)
Last Comment: Donna Martin Graduates! on Feb 8, 2008 05:03 PM.