
It's a Wednesday night, and since Lost is on hiatus it's America's Got Talent time. Who will join the mass of acts deemed talented enough to compete in Las Vegas in the far-oof Round 2. More importantly, who will join Voices of Glory, the unpopular dancing kid, and the yokel as the show-ending act that actually has a chance to win. From a city we've almost certainly visted before...this is America's Got Talent!
Standard recap video package, which of course no one needs when they have as talented and handsome a recapper as I. Nick tells us AGT is the smash hit of the summer (you're welcome, NBC!) and tonight the search will heat up, presumably more than it's heated up every other night when Nick has promised that. Main titles.
Nick opens the show in Houston this time, moving the auditions to an honest-to-goodness new city in a petty attempt to escalate our feud. Well played Cannon, but the show is young.

A lot of interiors of NASA, a countdown of Nick in places he never should have been given security clearance, he shrieks "blast off," and we're ready for one of those montages of people screaming and waving flags. Nick reminds us that everything is bigger in Texas (or so he hopes) and this will be the biggest audition yet. There's the footage of the judges entering which I'm pretty sure they're just reusing at this point (minus some guy in an admittedly sweet "Don't Hassle the Hoff" tee) and we're at last ready to go.

Up first is some blond singer named Divani who's wandering around with a walkman. She's telling us how good she is at expressing emotion , how much she wants to be a singer, how she's going to give 110% today, blah, blah, blah. Is there like one script these people read from? Out on stage, she tells David that she's originally from Russia (which seems like it would have made more interesting background) and then, after Sharon ribbing David for being male, Divani's ready to sing. But oh dear, is this woman terrible. I think the earlier "drowned cat" act was more melodious than her. Piers hits the X and the audience boos loudly, and afterwards she justifies herself to David because she cannot sing "when everyone is loud." Nick scores his second point on me tonight by humorously noting she can't sing when everyone is quiet, either, and Divani is out.
Jolie and Lester provide some uncomfortable fun by having Nick throw vegetables into a lawn mower that Lester (quite impressively) has balanced in his mouth, and this kicks off a fun failure montage. Texas homeboy Rusty gives a mediocre rendition of "If I Were A Richman" and is Xed out, Stone White does this weird robot rockstar thing that's actually pretty good but gets the axe anyway, and after the vegetable throwers finally get sent home the judges file off to complain about the lack of talent. For all of those who had 8 minutes in the pool, Piers wins it for you by saying, "Houston, we have a problem" as we go to break.

There's a recap of the failure montage (THAT WE JUST SAW), Nick reheats the Houston-problem line, and next up are a bunch of girls with identical outfits and wigs. Nick has gone a whole commercial break without being the center of attention and wears one of the wigs as he interviews the girls, who are apparently some local dance team. They take the stage and jump around a lot, and after some build-up from David they're off. They do a well-choreographed and extremely synchronized dance to "Shake Your Groove Thing" and the audience definitely likes them. Piers demands to know the idea behind the wigs, and some girl nervously stammers her way through an answer about loving the seventies. Piers decides it's reasonable and that he will spare her life, and suddenly Sharon is all about meeting the choreographers. They come out too as Hoff raves about their dance (but shockingly no patented "you're what this show os all about) and all the judges vote them through. They jump around and shriek as only preteen girls and Nick Cannon can, and then there's crying and celebrating and it's time for another break.

« Big Brother Countdown Picture Contest: Three Days! | Main | Big Brother Countdown Picture Contest »


Comments (3)
Not to nitpick but when Hairo was performing, Nick said it looked like he didn't have any "bones", not "balls". Because of all the awkward positions he was putting himself in.
I hate Nick at this point as much as you do (why do they keep going away from an interesting act to show his reactions? Jerry wasn't this insecure.) but he wasn't at fault THIS time.
1 of 3 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on July 7, 2009 4:22 AM
Anonymous, if you watch the Susan Boyle clip, the hosts on Britain's Got Talent do the same thing. I'm guessing we got it from them.
I think the red thing on Marty the Magician's jacket was some sort of high-tech nametag. I'm pretty sure the red spelled out Marty.
2 of 3 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on July 7, 2009 8:48 AM
p.s. can't wait til big brother.
also, I thought Hairo was good, but IMO nowhere as entertaining as other breakers shown on SYTYCD.
3 of 3 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on July 7, 2009 8:54 AM